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Choose Your Own [chat] 2

BogartBogart Streetwise HerculesRegistered User, Moderator mod
edited July 2017 in Debate and/or Discourse
The Miskatonic University is not large by the standards of modern temples of learning, but it has a reputation like no other. Few seats of learning have quite the turnover in staff that Miskatonic seems to bear, and fewer still have such dazzling and well-secured collections of eldritch artifacts on its grounds. And no other, surely, can boast that it's Assistant Dean has been found in his office, dressed in robes not altogether unlike that of a religious order, disembowelled and placed carefully in a pentagram drawn in his own blood last Tuesday morning.

It is this last unhappy occurrence that sees you peering at the dark stains on the floor of Dean Lumley's office, the august Dean himself behind you nervously shifting his weight from one foot to another as he mutters under his breath about the University's reputation. Plainly, this is no ordinary murder, and Assistant Dean Rufus Campbell was no ordinary academic. Foul deeds are afoot, and their source is perhaps fouler than any here suspect. That trace of greenish slime leading to the window the cleaner has not quite managed to scrub out sets your mind racing, as do the fragments of university gossip about the Assistant Dean's occasional lectures on matters perhaps not best suited to impressionable young minds.

But who are you, investigator? What brought you to the fog-bound streets of Arkham and the darkening corridors of the Miskatonic University to stand here, about to embark on the most dangerous adventure of your life?

You are Professor Sylvia Rathbone, visiting scholar from the dreaming spires of Oxford's little-known but well-funded St. Derleth University, home to one of only three known copies of Abdul Alhazred's Necronomicon. Young, considering your impressive achievements in extra-dimensional science, somewhat austere in manner but focused like whatever the mid-1920's equivalent of a wicked cool laser might be when investigating. You are eminently qualified to look into paranormal phenomena, and your reputation as the foremost mind in the field of eldritch research proceeds you. Turn to page 114.

You are Mr. Whiskers, a cat. Turn to page 356.

Bogart on
cptruggedChanusRMS OceanicElkiPowerpuppiesApothe0sisSleepThomamelasSir Landsharkmatt has a problemSurfpossumBurnageArchtyrannusGooeyFuzzy Cumulonimbus CloudronyasurrealitycheckKid PresentableHavelock2.0jakobaggercB557DarkPrimusemnmnmemysticjuicerRedTideNeco
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Posts

  • cptruggedcptrugged I think it has something to do with free will. Registered User regular
    YES.

    PowerpuppiesSleepronyaKid PresentableHavelock2.0mysticjuicer
  • milskimilski Poyo! Registered User regular
    >get ye flask

    I ate an engineer
    EchoSleepmysticjuicer
  • Hahnsoo1Hahnsoo1 Make Ready. We Hunt.Registered User regular
    I am Mr. Whiskers.

    Di87pOF.jpg
    PSN: Hahnsoo | MH Rise: Hahnsoo, Switch FC: SW-0085-2679-5212
    Arch
  • nexuscrawlernexuscrawler Registered User regular
    I think @Vanguard deserves an award for best last post in a chat thread

    Vanguard
  • BogartBogart Streetwise Hercules Registered User, Moderator mod
    No sense posting your choice. All choices will be covered by further posts, and the idea is to click on the page option you want and carry on doing so until you die, or you reach the end. Page references in posts will be edited to link to later posts when those posts have been written.

    Sleepmysticjuicer
  • milskimilski Poyo! Registered User regular
    >Find Duke, the dog.

    >protect Duke until the end of the adventure

    I ate an engineer
    PowerpuppiesSleepRMS Oceanicmysticjuicer
  • Apothe0sisApothe0sis Have you ever questioned the nature of your reality? Registered User regular
    how can a trackpad be the worst thing ever

    have we forgotten the directional nubbin and the trackball

  • STATE OF THE ART ROBOTSTATE OF THE ART ROBOT Registered User regular
    I slept on it and yeah I still want Kingsway very bad.

  • RMS OceanicRMS Oceanic Registered User regular
    Mr Whiskers: OPEN the FORBIDDEN NECRONOMICON OF THE MAD ARAB ABDUL AL-HAZRAD

  • ChanusChanus Benny Harvey -RIP-Registered User regular
    Apothe0sis wrote: »
    how can a trackpad be the worst thing ever

    have we forgotten the directional nubbin and the trackball

    yes

    well

    had

    Allegedly a voice of reason.
    Apothe0sis
  • zepherinzepherin Russian warship, go fuck yourself Registered User regular
    I wasn't done talking about melee weapons and old school stuff. Where is my ancient warfare chat?

  • STATE OF THE ART ROBOTSTATE OF THE ART ROBOT Registered User regular
    I turn to page 143 because I am my own cat!

    Apothe0sis
  • AbdhyiusAbdhyius Registered User regular
    http://www.cracked.com/article/197_the-7-most-badass-last-stands-in-history-battle/
    "No man resisted or offered to stand up in his defense, save one only, a centurion, Sempronius Densus, the single man among so many thousands that the sun beheld that day act worthily of the Roman empire, who, though he never received any favor from Galba, yet out of bravery and allegiance endeavored to defend the throne." - Plutarch, Lives

    Sempronius Densus was a grizzled old war veteran who took his job as a Roman Imperial Guard very seriously. So he wasn't about to run when he saw a few thousand mutinous Roman soldiers marching on the palace preparing to execute the Emperor. It's important to keep in mind that Densus had no particular loyalties to the Emperor Galba. He just knew that his job description called for him to put his life on the line to save the son of a bitch, and he didn't fuck around when he was on the job. So Densus walked towards the mob, brandishing his Centurion Whacking Stick--a short cudgel that Roman officers used to administer back-breaking corporal punishment to out-of-line soldiers--and ordered the advancing men to stop.

    Seeing that the blood thirsty, sword carrying mob of 1,000 wasn't listening to the one dude with a stick, Densus pulled his pugio--a short dagger roughly half the size of the standard Roman sword. Thinking that should convey just how much business he meant, Densus once again screamed at them to stop. Again, they kept on marching. Certain that they'd been able to hear him that last time, Densus shrugged, probably said, "You asked for it," and lunged on the posse. Completely surrounded, Densus fought the entire army by himself to defend a man he hardly knew. Hardened by years of combat, he slashed his way through the army, as Plutarch puts it, "for some time." His courageous stand ended when he was brought down by a blow to the back of the knee and enthusiastically murdered by the mob. Unfortunately for the guy he was guarding, the men operating his carriage were so awestruck by Densus' giant balls that they dropped their gear and ran for it, face-planting the Emperor in the turf.

    Galba was killed, decapitated and his head was paraded around town on a spear. Plutarch fails to mention what the mob did with Sempronius Densus' body, though we have to imagine it involved very little parading, and a whole lot of staying the hell away. As slasher films would go on to teach us, you should never assume you've actually killed anyone who can kill that many people with just a knife.

    ftOqU21.png
    RMS OceanicChanusBlackDragon480TL DRmysticjuicer
  • Apothe0sisApothe0sis Have you ever questioned the nature of your reality? Registered User regular
    I am Mr Whiskers, a cat and if this thread gets locked before page 356 my rights as a feline are being oppressed

    Sleep
  • ThomamelasThomamelas Only one man can kill this many Russians. Bring his guitar to me! Registered User regular
    @Elldren

    I really want the narrator from the CSB videos to speak at my funeral. A post mortem discussion of my death. "Tom died peacefully in his sleep, unlike his screaming passengers."

    Abdhyiusmatt has a problemElldren
  • bowenbowen How you doin'? Registered User regular
    > Put it in the butt

    not a doctor, not a lawyer, examples I use may not be fully researched so don't take out of context plz, don't @ me
  • Jubal77Jubal77 Registered User regular
    Blizz laying down the rules in Overwatch for general trolling behavior. And all I can say is good more devs should do this.

    HerrCronRedTide
  • RMS OceanicRMS Oceanic Registered User regular
    Year of the Four Emperors is a pretty exciting story

  • ChanusChanus Benny Harvey -RIP-Registered User regular
    tav

    Allegedly a voice of reason.
    Tav
  • IlpalaIlpala Just this guy, y'know TexasRegistered User regular
    Abdhyius wrote: »
    http://www.cracked.com/article/197_the-7-most-badass-last-stands-in-history-battle/
    "No man resisted or offered to stand up in his defense, save one only, a centurion, Sempronius Densus, the single man among so many thousands that the sun beheld that day act worthily of the Roman empire, who, though he never received any favor from Galba, yet out of bravery and allegiance endeavored to defend the throne." - Plutarch, Lives

    Sempronius Densus was a grizzled old war veteran who took his job as a Roman Imperial Guard very seriously. So he wasn't about to run when he saw a few thousand mutinous Roman soldiers marching on the palace preparing to execute the Emperor. It's important to keep in mind that Densus had no particular loyalties to the Emperor Galba. He just knew that his job description called for him to put his life on the line to save the son of a bitch, and he didn't fuck around when he was on the job. So Densus walked towards the mob, brandishing his Centurion Whacking Stick--a short cudgel that Roman officers used to administer back-breaking corporal punishment to out-of-line soldiers--and ordered the advancing men to stop.

    Seeing that the blood thirsty, sword carrying mob of 1,000 wasn't listening to the one dude with a stick, Densus pulled his pugio--a short dagger roughly half the size of the standard Roman sword. Thinking that should convey just how much business he meant, Densus once again screamed at them to stop. Again, they kept on marching. Certain that they'd been able to hear him that last time, Densus shrugged, probably said, "You asked for it," and lunged on the posse. Completely surrounded, Densus fought the entire army by himself to defend a man he hardly knew. Hardened by years of combat, he slashed his way through the army, as Plutarch puts it, "for some time." His courageous stand ended when he was brought down by a blow to the back of the knee and enthusiastically murdered by the mob. Unfortunately for the guy he was guarding, the men operating his carriage were so awestruck by Densus' giant balls that they dropped their gear and ran for it, face-planting the Emperor in the turf.

    Galba was killed, decapitated and his head was paraded around town on a spear. Plutarch fails to mention what the mob did with Sempronius Densus' body, though we have to imagine it involved very little parading, and a whole lot of staying the hell away. As slasher films would go on to teach us, you should never assume you've actually killed anyone who can kill that many people with just a knife.

    I accidentally a word from that url and thought this was going to be about how Jojo is real.

    FF XIV - Qih'to Furishu (on Siren), Battle.Net - Ilpala#1975
    Switch - SW-7373-3669-3011
    Fuck Joe Manchin
    mysticjuicer
  • STATE OF THE ART ROBOTSTATE OF THE ART ROBOT Registered User regular
    The only bad thing about legalized pot is that the smell is a lot more common.

  • ThomamelasThomamelas Only one man can kill this many Russians. Bring his guitar to me! Registered User regular
    Year of the Four Emperors is a pretty exciting story

    Exciting and terrifying. It's amazing how the difference is a matter of where you're observing from.

    Yoshisummons
  • PowerpuppiesPowerpuppies Registered User regular
    I'm so excited

    sig.gif
    ElkiSleepEddy
  • RMS OceanicRMS Oceanic Registered User regular
    Thomamelas wrote: »
    Year of the Four Emperors is a pretty exciting story

    Exciting and terrifying. It's amazing how the difference is a matter of where you're observing from.

    True. The Year of the Six Emperors is equally intense, especially how the last emperor standing is a thirteen year old boy.

  • STATE OF THE ART ROBOTSTATE OF THE ART ROBOT Registered User regular
    Relavent to this [chat] thread

  • VanguardVanguard But now the dream is over. And the insect is awake.Registered User, __BANNED USERS regular
    I think @Vanguard deserves an award for best last post in a chat thread

    i am inclined to agree

  • AbdhyiusAbdhyius Registered User regular
    Thomamelas wrote: »
    @Elldren

    I really want the narrator from the CSB videos to speak at my funeral. A post mortem discussion of my death. "Tom died peacefully in his sleep, unlike his screaming passengers."


    this is fascinating

    ftOqU21.png
  • ChanusChanus Benny Harvey -RIP-Registered User regular
    turn the page is one of those songs i could live with never hearing again

    i've heard it like 400 too many times already

    Allegedly a voice of reason.
  • SleepSleep Registered User regular
    I am so fuckin excited the only other one of these is literally my only bookmarked thread.

    Bogart
  • STATE OF THE ART ROBOTSTATE OF THE ART ROBOT Registered User regular
    Chanus wrote: »
    turn the page is one of those songs i could live with never hearing again

    i've heard it like 400 too many times already

    Eh, I still like it. Is good song.

  • ChanusChanus Benny Harvey -RIP-Registered User regular
    Chanus wrote: »
    turn the page is one of those songs i could live with never hearing again

    i've heard it like 400 too many times already

    Eh, I still like it. Is good song.

    eh

    Allegedly a voice of reason.
    STATE OF THE ART ROBOT
  • VanguardVanguard But now the dream is over. And the insect is awake.Registered User, __BANNED USERS regular
    also i got an error on my switch this morning

    don't know the code off the top of my head but it's the first time it ever happened

    hrmmm

  • BlackDragon480BlackDragon480 Bluster Kerfuffle Master of Windy ImportRegistered User regular
    bowen wrote: »
    > Put it in the butt

    No matter where you go...there you are.
    ~ Buckaroo Banzai
    FroThulhu
  • ThomamelasThomamelas Only one man can kill this many Russians. Bring his guitar to me! Registered User regular
    Abdhyius wrote: »
    Thomamelas wrote: »
    Elldren

    I really want the narrator from the CSB videos to speak at my funeral. A post mortem discussion of my death. "Tom died peacefully in his sleep, unlike his screaming passengers."


    this is fascinating

    Which part? All of the CSB videos are like this. Someone did something dumb from a policy/procedure/design perspective and then something exploded.

  • STATE OF THE ART ROBOTSTATE OF THE ART ROBOT Registered User regular
    Chanus wrote: »
    Chanus wrote: »
    turn the page is one of those songs i could live with never hearing again

    i've heard it like 400 too many times already

    Eh, I still like it. Is good song.

    eh

    ehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

    ChanusHahnsoo1
  • STATE OF THE ART ROBOTSTATE OF THE ART ROBOT Registered User regular
    Vanguard wrote: »
    also i got an error on my switch this morning

    don't know the code off the top of my head but it's the first time it ever happened

    hrmmm

    doom
    Doom
    DOOM

  • ThomamelasThomamelas Only one man can kill this many Russians. Bring his guitar to me! Registered User regular
    Taco Bell has, quite literally, found a new marketing vehicle, and its name is Lyft.

    The fast-food chain is beginning a venture with the ride-sharing company this week that will allow Lyft passengers to request rides that incorporate a stop at a Taco Bell drive-through between 9 p.m. and 2 a.m.

    The companies will test the option, which will appear as “Taco Mode” in the Lyft app, during the next two weeks around a Newport Beach, Calif., location, with plans to expand the program nationally next year.
    ]

    The first shot of the Franchise Wars has been fired. In a few months we will get the glorious hygiene revolution that is the three seashells.

    ChanuscptruggedHahnsoo1SummaryJudgmentmatt has a problemMazzyxAtomikaFroThulhumysticjuicerEddy
  • descdesc Goretexing to death Registered User regular
    Vanguard wrote: »
    also i got an error on my switch this morning

    don't know the code off the top of my head but it's the first time it ever happened

    hrmmm

    Your Marios need more RAM

  • RMS OceanicRMS Oceanic Registered User regular
    Chanus wrote: »
    turn the page is one of those songs i could live with never hearing again

    i've heard it like 400 too many times already

    Is it because you're actually forty-seventh generation Roman but don't know or care when you're spitting?

    Chanus
This discussion has been closed.