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We're all just doing our best for our [Kids]

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Posts

  • HardtargetHardtarget There Are Four Lights VancouverRegistered User regular
    huh, they put a expansion team down in Tampa? that's cute


    also oh god @plufim i'm sorry to hear that

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  • plufimplufim Dr Registered User regular
    edited February 20
    MNC Dover wrote: »
    plufim wrote: »
    Just got a call from my wife, C tripped over on the playground and has a gash on his forehead, he's with the principal. My in-laws are on their way to get him, I would take twice as long as I bussed to work today.

    I hope it's OK, but I can't do much.

    Also my uncle died last night and I haven't processed that yet either.

    Jesus. I'm sorry to hear all that Plufim. If you need anything at all, don't be afraid to ask.

    Thanks, I just needed somewhere to vent. The uncle death is very recent, so I can't say much anywhere else.

    An update: on the way to pick up C, the in-laws had O.... Who vomited all over their car, meaning they could not drop him in to childcare as planned. They did get to C, the gash was not too bad, no stitches needed, but he's still not allowed to stay at school, which upset him.

    Now the in-laws have them both but they have a deadline so my wife has had to cancel her afternoon plans, which were a necessary part of her study.

    In the meantime my knee, for no fucking reason, has started to be in excruciating pain. So off to the physio.

    The last 24 hours have been garbage.

    plufim on
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  • Mojo_JojoMojo_Jojo But do you really believe him? Registered User regular
    Has anybody got a toddler clock? The things that you set with a time and it gives the kid a visual indication that it's okay to get out of bed? Burpette is clearly struggling with when she should be getting up, and we've had a few times where she's wandered into our room at 4am to see what the deal is with having some breakfast.

    Reading reviews makes it sound like they are all fundamentally flawed and either the "night" mod is a blue light four or five times as bright as the sun, or they need setting each and everyday, or they have no concept of weekends, or they also double up as an encrypted webcam, or blah blah blah

    Homogeneous distribution of your varieties of amuse-gueule
  • SporkAndrewSporkAndrew Registered User, ClubPA regular
    Mojo_Jojo wrote: »
    Has anybody got a toddler clock? The things that you set with a time and it gives the kid a visual indication that it's okay to get out of bed? Burpette is clearly struggling with when she should be getting up, and we've had a few times where she's wandered into our room at 4am to see what the deal is with having some breakfast.

    Reading reviews makes it sound like they are all fundamentally flawed and either the "night" mod is a blue light four or five times as bright as the sun, or they need setting each and everyday, or they have no concept of weekends, or they also double up as an encrypted webcam, or blah blah blah

    We've got the Gro-Clock. It's bright but then again he used to sleep with a blue nightlight that was around the same sort of luminosity so it hasn't affected anything. You can set two different times so you'd have one for nap times and one for bedtime, and it's easy enough to set the times to what you want with a few button presses. You need to turn it on each time you want to use it but it's become muscle memory to press the buttons to get it on (down down ok - down to wake the screen up, down to select "nighttime" mode and then "ok" to put the sun to bed)

    It's still working now at 5+ apart from the odd time where he'll not be feeling well so he'll come get us up, or something woke him up so he comes and gets in our bed. He still knows it's "bedtime" though so the instances of wanting to be up and awake have gone right down

    We've had positive feedback from friends that we recommended it to, so it's not just us. Last New Year's we had one set of friends staying over with their daughter and she and ours slept in his room, but because my wife has never figured out the clock she managed to set the get-up time to 10am. So when we all had a nice lie-in on New Year's day and woke up after 9 we went in and found them playing happily with the few toys he has in his room (quiet stuff like a few cars, some duplo and building blocks). They then shushed us and kicked us out of the room because the sun hadn't come up yet

    The one about the fucking space hairdresser and the cowboy. He's got a tinfoil pal and a pedal bin. His father's a robot and he's fucking fucked his sister. Lego. They're all made of fucking lego.
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  • ProlegomenaProlegomena Frictionless Spinning The VoidRegistered User regular
    We have found that the gro-clock works, it has at least eliminated the 4:30/5 am disturbances, though Owen tends to struggle with the last half hour before the sun comes on as far as not, say, kicking the wall next to his bed as hard as possible or loudly squawking through his version of the alphabet song*.

    *A B C D E F G H...... P M ......S Y.....NOW I KNOW MY A-B-C

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  • Banzai5150Banzai5150 Registered User regular
    Mojo_Jojo wrote: »
    Has anybody got a toddler clock? The things that you set with a time and it gives the kid a visual indication that it's okay to get out of bed? Burpette is clearly struggling with when she should be getting up, and we've had a few times where she's wandered into our room at 4am to see what the deal is with having some breakfast.

    Reading reviews makes it sound like they are all fundamentally flawed and either the "night" mod is a blue light four or five times as bright as the sun, or they need setting each and everyday, or they have no concept of weekends, or they also double up as an encrypted webcam, or blah blah blah

    We have a green glow one. Kate has been great about sleeping in so she would just bring us the clock when it was glowing green and we were already up.

    https://smile.amazon.com/gp/product/B00EAHSBV4/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_asin_title_o05__o00_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1

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  • SmrtnikSmrtnik job boli zub Registered User regular
    Mojo_Jojo wrote: »
    Has anybody got a toddler clock? The things that you set with a time and it gives the kid a visual indication that it's okay to get out of bed? Burpette is clearly struggling with when she should be getting up, and we've had a few times where she's wandered into our room at 4am to see what the deal is with having some breakfast.

    Reading reviews makes it sound like they are all fundamentally flawed and either the "night" mod is a blue light four or five times as bright as the sun, or they need setting each and everyday, or they have no concept of weekends, or they also double up as an encrypted webcam, or blah blah blah

    We've got the Gro-Clock. It's bright but then again he used to sleep with a blue nightlight that was around the same sort of luminosity so it hasn't affected anything. You can set two different times so you'd have one for nap times and one for bedtime, and it's easy enough to set the times to what you want with a few button presses. You need to turn it on each time you want to use it but it's become muscle memory to press the buttons to get it on (down down ok - down to wake the screen up, down to select "nighttime" mode and then "ok" to put the sun to bed)

    It's still working now at 5+ apart from the odd time where he'll not be feeling well so he'll come get us up, or something woke him up so he comes and gets in our bed. He still knows it's "bedtime" though so the instances of wanting to be up and awake have gone right down

    We've had positive feedback from friends that we recommended it to, so it's not just us. Last New Year's we had one set of friends staying over with their daughter and she and ours slept in his room, but because my wife has never figured out the clock she managed to set the get-up time to 10am. So when we all had a nice lie-in on New Year's day and woke up after 9 we went in and found them playing happily with the few toys he has in his room (quiet stuff like a few cars, some duplo and building blocks). They then shushed us and kicked us out of the room because the sun hadn't come up yet

    We have the same thing, our daughter loves it, and usually stays in bed until the sun is back. She goes to the bathroom if she needs to them back to her too until sun is up, even. She is 3.5 right now and we've had it for about a year now. She knows the down down ok combo and it's part of the bedtime routine for her to put the sun to sleep.

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  • SporkAndrewSporkAndrew Registered User, ClubPA regular
    Has anyone else encountered blind-spots with numbers before? Freddie seems to forget that the number 15 exists

    There's times when he's "measuring" something where he'll just count really fast and he'll get to "eleven twelve thirteen fourteen sixteen" and we thought it was just because he was rattling through the numbers so quick that he's skip over it, but school have been counting in fives last week so when I was showing him how that corresponded to time on his watch he bounced his fingers around the face "five ten twenty twenty-five thirty thirty-five" stopping at the 6.

    I make a point of reminding him that it exists and he'll go back and include it but it's still really weird

    The one about the fucking space hairdresser and the cowboy. He's got a tinfoil pal and a pedal bin. His father's a robot and he's fucking fucked his sister. Lego. They're all made of fucking lego.
  • Banzai5150Banzai5150 Registered User regular
    Has anyone else encountered blind-spots with numbers before? Freddie seems to forget that the number 15 exists

    There's times when he's "measuring" something where he'll just count really fast and he'll get to "eleven twelve thirteen fourteen sixteen" and we thought it was just because he was rattling through the numbers so quick that he's skip over it, but school have been counting in fives last week so when I was showing him how that corresponded to time on his watch he bounced his fingers around the face "five ten twenty twenty-five thirty thirty-five" stopping at the 6.

    I make a point of reminding him that it exists and he'll go back and include it but it's still really weird

    For a while Kate counted "1,2,3, 6,8 ,9, 10".. after slowing her down and making her sound out all the numbers, she finally caught on and can now do 1-10 no problem without forgetting anything. She had a bad hang up remember 3 existed so I had her count to 3 over and over.

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  • SporkAndrewSporkAndrew Registered User, ClubPA regular
    Banzai5150 wrote: »
    For a while Kate counted "1,2,3, 6,8 ,9, 10".. after slowing her down and making her sound out all the numbers, she finally caught on and can now do 1-10 no problem without forgetting anything. She had a bad hang up remember 3 existed so I had her count to 3 over and over.

    Yeah, I've been trying to get him to count from 10 onwards but then he doesn't understand and starts at 1 and then gets angry at me for suggesting that you could start counting at any number other than 1. I guess I'll just keep trying to slow him down

    The one about the fucking space hairdresser and the cowboy. He's got a tinfoil pal and a pedal bin. His father's a robot and he's fucking fucked his sister. Lego. They're all made of fucking lego.
  • BrodyBrody The Watch The First ShoreRegistered User regular
    I honestly still have to be careful counting past 20 (I have a hard time keeping track of which numbers I've said once you get into the repetitiveness of twenty-one, thirty-one, forty-one), and I work in the engineering field. I think my report cards from elementary school comment on it.

    "The shore does not dream of you." - Blind poet Gallan.
  • djmitchelladjmitchella Registered User regular
    We had a Gro clock for one kid, then a teach-me-time clock (same brand as the 'ok to wake' one Banzai5150 posted, just with a few more features), they both seemed to work fine.

  • ceresceres When the last moon is cast over the last star of morning And the future has past without even a last desperate warningRegistered User, Moderator mod
    We have found that the gro-clock works, it has at least eliminated the 4:30/5 am disturbances, though Owen tends to struggle with the last half hour before the sun comes on as far as not, say, kicking the wall next to his bed as hard as possible or loudly squawking through his version of the alphabet song*.

    *A B C D E F G H...... P M ......S Y.....NOW I KNOW MY A-B-C

    At least he's learning while obnoxious. And when he kicks the wall you can pound back and say "Hey, cut it out! It's LMNOP! You better have it right before I get out of bed!"

    Has anyone else encountered blind-spots with numbers before? Freddie seems to forget that the number 15 exists

    There's times when he's "measuring" something where he'll just count really fast and he'll get to "eleven twelve thirteen fourteen sixteen" and we thought it was just because he was rattling through the numbers so quick that he's skip over it, but school have been counting in fives last week so when I was showing him how that corresponded to time on his watch he bounced his fingers around the face "five ten twenty twenty-five thirty thirty-five" stopping at the 6.

    I make a point of reminding him that it exists and he'll go back and include it but it's still really weird

    My son would miss 14 and 15 consistently. We ended up deciding to mostly leave it alone because we were just happy he could count to 20. It worked itself out, I guess with school and when we counted with him we just said all the numbers. He also got "me" and "you" mixed up for a really long time. His teachers said that with basic developmental concepts like it's better not to turn it into a thing because they'll usually fix it themselves over time after seeing it modeled the correct way enough times.

    Now, mine was 4. If yours is 8 that's probably a little different and should be checked out :P

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  • MNC DoverMNC Dover Game Designer/Stay-at-home Dad Seattle, WARegistered User regular
    I watched the first episode of Doom Patrol yesterday. Cliff is told he’s been presumed dead for 7 years and he wants to get back to his family. For some reason I started reflecting that on my own life, being away from my kids for a long period of time, and it got to me hard.

    What the fuck is wrong with me? That sort of plot device never did anything to me before. What is going on? What have my kids done to me?!

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  • JansonJanson Registered User regular
    edited February 21
    Niko’s been bonding with @Moriveth more lately over video games; he still usually refuses to let Mori put him to bed, however.

    The kids hate sleeping in their own beds so often we just give up and let them pile in the bed with us.

    Niko has a lot of congestion and usually tries to prop his head up; it seems to be more comfortable for him (he can probably breathe more easily!).

    So tonight I find Niko sleeping on Mori like this:

    2019-02-21%2000.59.40.jpg

    (edit: that means Niko is lying across the bed and taking up a good 1/3rd by himself. Anya and I are wedged into the last third; I don’t even have enough space to lie on my back. Sigh)

    Janson on
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  • KakodaimonosKakodaimonos Registered User regular
    MNC Dover wrote: »
    I watched the first episode of Doom Patrol yesterday. Cliff is told he’s been presumed dead for 7 years and he wants to get back to his family. For some reason I started reflecting that on my own life, being away from my kids for a long period of time, and it got to me hard.

    What the fuck is wrong with me? That sort of plot device never did anything to me before. What is going on? What have my kids done to me?!

    Funny, isn't it. I had something similar when I started playing "Last of Us". Got through the opening and then I'm sitting there with my baby daughter sleeping on my chest and welp, maybe I'll go play a different game.

    DisruptedCapitalistPeen
  • BlazeFireBlazeFire Registered User regular
    Media where children are in peril affect me way more now that I have kids. I almost had to turn Bird Box off.

    I recently listened to an episode of Malcolm Gladwell's podcast (King of Tears, http://revisionisthistory.com/episodes/16-the-king-of-tears) that discussed why some songs make us cry. The episode was alright but the takeaway was that specifics in songs (and media in general, I think) that connect to our lives can really affect us.

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  • Mojo_JojoMojo_Jojo But do you really believe him? Registered User regular
    Yes, media with children in peril really stresses me out since having Burpette.

    I remember my first trip away where I watched a film about a child abduction on the flight. That was a poor move.

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  • schussschuss Registered User regular
    Do not, under any circumstances, read The Road then. That book was brutal enough kidless.

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  • furlionfurlion Riskbreaker Lea MondeRegistered User regular
    Last month child services took my brothers kids from him. It is too convoluted to get into but it was not over anything terrible. So yesterday we went to court, and they gave his kids to my wife and I. So now despite me being snipped and her getting an ablation we have 2 more kids, my 4 year old nephew and 1.5 year old niece. They are pretty great kids so I can't complain too much yet but this is not what we wanted. They should have them both back in the next month or so but it is going to be tough adjusting to two more kids. Especially on my wife since I work nights. Thank god they both sleep through the night at least.

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  • Banzai5150Banzai5150 Registered User regular
    furlion wrote: »
    Last month child services took my brothers kids from him. It is too convoluted to get into but it was not over anything terrible. So yesterday we went to court, and they gave his kids to my wife and I. So now despite me being snipped and her getting an ablation we have 2 more kids, my 4 year old nephew and 1.5 year old niece. They are pretty great kids so I can't complain too much yet but this is not what we wanted. They should have them both back in the next month or so but it is going to be tough adjusting to two more kids. Especially on my wife since I work nights. Thank god they both sleep through the night at least.

    It’s awesome of you and your wife to do this!

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  • SyphonBlueSyphonBlue Registered User regular
    furlion wrote: »
    Last month child services took my brothers kids from him. It is too convoluted to get into but it was not over anything terrible. So yesterday we went to court, and they gave his kids to my wife and I. So now despite me being snipped and her getting an ablation we have 2 more kids, my 4 year old nephew and 1.5 year old niece. They are pretty great kids so I can't complain too much yet but this is not what we wanted. They should have them both back in the next month or so but it is going to be tough adjusting to two more kids. Especially on my wife since I work nights. Thank god they both sleep through the night at least.

    So uh...how hard/expensive was this? Cause we are also in the middle of trying to do this. Except ours involves some terrible shit including the mother kidnapping the kids twice and taking them out of state, even though she has a court order prohibiting her from doing so. The father has already stated his intention of giving the kid to us, should he get custody (and at this point, being the second time she's kidnapped the kids against state orders, shouldn't be too hard).

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  • furlionfurlion Riskbreaker Lea MondeRegistered User regular
    SyphonBlue wrote: »
    furlion wrote: »
    Last month child services took my brothers kids from him. It is too convoluted to get into but it was not over anything terrible. So yesterday we went to court, and they gave his kids to my wife and I. So now despite me being snipped and her getting an ablation we have 2 more kids, my 4 year old nephew and 1.5 year old niece. They are pretty great kids so I can't complain too much yet but this is not what we wanted. They should have them both back in the next month or so but it is going to be tough adjusting to two more kids. Especially on my wife since I work nights. Thank god they both sleep through the night at least.

    So uh...how hard/expensive was this? Cause we are also in the middle of trying to do this. Except ours involves some terrible shit including the mother kidnapping the kids twice and taking them out of state, even though she has a court order prohibiting her from doing so. The father has already stated his intention of giving the kid to us, should he get custody (and at this point, being the second time she's kidnapped the kids against state orders, shouldn't be too hard).

    We are in a different situation I think. The court had the kids in foster care, but it is always better to have them with family. So once they did the home inspection and met with us they decided it was in the kids best interest for them to stay with us for now. Both parents will be getting the kids back once they do some counseling and take a psychiatric evaluation. They are only in our temporary custody while my brother and his wife comply with the court orders. They are actually great parents but through a series of increasingly convoluted and unlikely events, some of which were actually their own fault, child services got involved. As a parent looking at their parenting style objectively I do have some issues, but nothing bad enough to lose their kids over. I reserve that for the anti-vaccine nutcases who should lose all parental rights and be jailed for neglect.

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  • MulysaSemproniusMulysaSempronius but also susie nyRegistered User regular
    I was watching a t.v. show recently, and had to look up whether a kid made it or not before I could continue. Countless adults getting messed up and killed? Sad, but I can handle it. One kid who is lost, in danger, and may come to serious harm? That's a nope from me right now.

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  • Drake ChambersDrake Chambers Lay out my formal shorts. Registered User regular
    Yeah, while we're doing trigger warnings -- there's some controversy surrounding an Oscar-nominated short film called Detainment.

    I was curious and read about it and of all the things in life I wish I could un-know this is the worst. I'll just say if you are a parent, don't read about it. You will gain nothing from it. It'll just haunt you and make the world seem a darker place.

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  • BrodyBrody The Watch The First ShoreRegistered User regular
    edited February 21
    Man, when "When Called the Heart" season 5 came out a couple of months ago, I walked in for maybe the last half of the last episode, and one of the little girls was clearly upset, and that whole plot line had me practically balling. My wife got mad and almost kicked me out of the room cause I kept making loud gulping noises from trying to stop myself from full on crying. And the girl was totally fine, just sad because of the season end plot line, but I just kept thinking of my daughter looking that sad, and it made me sad.

    Brody on
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  • djmitchelladjmitchella Registered User regular
    So, on a lighter note -- one of our kids (9-year-old) takes a while in the bathroom these days, he tends to head off there and just listen to harry potter audiobooks for the n'th time on his mp3 player while taking care of business. Fine, whatever, we have two bathrooms, there's usually enough time.

    Yesterday, during breakfast, he gets up and starts moving that direction. But this time he doesn't just have headphones on, he has his hands full with a glass of juice and bowl of cereal he's taking along to pass the time..



    and that's how he discovered another of the boundaries his parents will set for him.

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  • El SkidEl Skid The frozen white northRegistered User regular
    edited February 21
    Yeah, I wish more studios could do what Last of Us did, weaving parenthood into their games. They don't hit you in the face with it (outside the first part), but parenthood is cleverly interwoven in the whole game. You can not be a parent and it's still a great game, but being a parent it's way more deep and engaging.

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  • Drake ChambersDrake Chambers Lay out my formal shorts. Registered User regular
    The story portions of Ori and the Blind Forest choke me up hard, to the degree that I can't immediately answer my kid's questions about it without sounding like I've been pepper sprayed.

    It's a fantastic story about protecting your children, and it's beautifully done. I imagine you can probably just watch it all as a short film somewhere online if you don't have the game. Highly recommended - just be prepared to bawl.

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  • ProlegomenaProlegomena Frictionless Spinning The VoidRegistered User regular
    The story portions of Ori and the Blind Forest choke me up hard, to the degree that I can't immediately answer my kid's questions about it without sounding like I've been pepper sprayed.

    It's a fantastic story about protecting your children, and it's beautifully done. I imagine you can probably just watch it all as a short film somewhere online if you don't have the game. Highly recommended - just be prepared to bawl.

    I played that through with my 3 year old, he's 7 now... I'm not sure I can talk about it yet.

    Drake Chambers
  • Drake ChambersDrake Chambers Lay out my formal shorts. Registered User regular
    The story is beautiful and worthwhile. It's a different take on the "monster" in games and stories.

    Spoiled story summarized:
    The main antagonist throughout the story is an owl that's depicted as a creature of darkness that hates the creatures of light. It is gradually revealed that the owl began her assault on the light side when a blast of light magic unintentionally incinerates her baby chicks in the nest, but she has one unhatched egg left and she's trying to protect it.

    At the climax, when the world is burning, she recognizes that Ori is a child of the light like her own. She sacrifices herself to end the destruction, saving the forest and her own unhatched egg in the process.

    Yeah, holy shit I made myself cry just typing that up, be forewarned!

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  • CogCog Registered User regular
    I sprained my back on Tuesday. Sprocket hurt her ankle at school and seems to think I should carry her everywhere. Something has to give.

    My back. It’s my back that will give.

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  • Banzai5150Banzai5150 Registered User regular
    I watch some medical drama shows with my wife from time to time. If a kid is the subject of the plot I know I’ll end up crying and hating the show. I can’t remember specifically the movie, but once I had a child of my own, a movie I had seen several times before, suddenly became hard to watch.

    Parenthood amirite?

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  • mrpakumrpaku Registered User regular
    I found the original Silent Hill available on like, PS3 or something years back shortly after we had the Little Man. Went from excited I could replay it (it was a favorite when I was a kid) to almost immediately nearly having an anxiety attack remembering that the entire game is "rescue your supernaturally imperilled child". I'll never be able to play it again because it now scares me on a level I'm not willing to inflict on myself for fun

    Smrtnik
  • djmitchelladjmitchella Registered User regular
    edited February 21
    I remember watching District 9 and realising that one of the aliens was a child, and even when the child is an alien prawn-sort-of-thing, I still was very concerned to confirm that nothing bad would happen to him before the movie was done.

    djmitchella on
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  • ceresceres When the last moon is cast over the last star of morning And the future has past without even a last desperate warningRegistered User, Moderator mod
    I hurt my neck by sleeping, because apparently that can happen when you're old. My 2 1/2 year old does not get it and is also an energetic ball of crazy, and she set me back hard last night and it's worse than it was when it started. Now I'm grouchy and hoping the doctor at urgent care gave me enough muscle relaxers to survive my child until this has worked itself out.

    And it seems like all is dying, and would leave the world to mourn
    Banzai5150
  • CogCog Registered User regular
    Banzai5150 wrote: »
    I watch some medical drama shows with my wife from time to time. If a kid is the subject of the plot I know I’ll end up crying and hating the show. I can’t remember specifically the movie, but once I had a child of my own, a movie I had seen several times before, suddenly became hard to watch.

    Parenthood amirite?

    Trainspotting.

    :bigfrown:

    Banzai5150
  • CogCog Registered User regular
    ceres wrote: »
    I hurt my neck by sleeping, because apparently that can happen when you're old. My 2 1/2 year old does not get it and is also an energetic ball of crazy, and she set me back hard last night and it's worse than it was when it started. Now I'm grouchy and hoping the doctor at urgent care gave me enough muscle relaxers to survive my child until this has worked itself out.

    It's super humbling when your body starts to refuse to cope with things it once would have taken in stride.

  • MNC DoverMNC Dover Game Designer/Stay-at-home Dad Seattle, WARegistered User regular
    Prior to having kids, the only movie that did anything to me was What Dreams May Come which came out in 1998. While it hurt to watch in 98, it didn't become unwatchable for me until I lost my mom in 2002. Now I simply cannot watch any part of that movie without balling.

    Then again, it's been almost 20 years now and I've had plenty of time to grieve and move on. Maybe I could handle watching it again. Best not to tempt it though.

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  • SmrtnikSmrtnik job boli zub Registered User regular
    MNC Dover wrote: »
    Prior to having kids, the only movie that did anything to me was What Dreams May Come which came out in 1998. While it hurt to watch in 98, it didn't become unwatchable for me until I lost my mom in 2002. Now I simply cannot watch any part of that movie without balling.

    Then again, it's been almost 20 years now and I've had plenty of time to grieve and move on. Maybe I could handle watching it again. Best not to tempt it though.

    Oh man i love that movie and yeah reliable waterworks each time.

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    MNC DoverDevlin_Dragonus
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