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Penny Arcade - Comic - Box Populi

DogDog Registered User, Administrator, Vanilla Staff admin
edited March 24 in The Penny Arcade Hub
imagePenny Arcade - Comic - Box Populi

Videogaming-related online strip by Mike Krahulik and Jerry Holkins. Includes news and commentary.

Read the full story here

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Posts

  • mcd25mcd25 Registered User new member
    hehe

  • Anon von ZilchAnon von Zilch Registered User regular
    Look, man, holes were cutting edge security for us back then! Did we even have shovels yet? Maybe give us, and Bjorn in particular, a break.

  • Rhesus PositiveRhesus Positive GNU Terry Pratchett Registered User regular
    One could argue that not drawing attention to the location could be an effective security measure

    Assuming there isn't a way the box can be tracked

    Which there might be, I was only half paying attention to the first cut and haven't watched the new one yet because four fucking hours

    [Muffled sounds of gorilla violence]
    cB557H3KnucklesPhoenix-D
  • QuidQuid I don't... what... hnnng Registered User regular
    Bjorn is doing the best he can!

    Rhesus Positive
  • DjiemDjiem Registered User regular
    And just like with the One Ring, Man continues to disappoint.

  • V1mV1m Registered User regular
    Djiem wrote: »
    And just like with the One Ring, Man continues to disappoint.

    "OK sure, we're the one who taught Sauron how to make those rings, and we helped him make them, and we totally told everyone he was cool, but it's absolutely Men's fault what happened next. Also shut up about the Silmarils, that was probably all humans too. Definitely not our fault. Now we have to go be smug about how wise and pure we are in Valinor, because we're sure not clearing up the fucking mess here."

    dejavu,againRhesus PositiveRingoH3KnucklesMan in the MistsDonnicton
  • LucascraftLucascraft Registered User regular
    In an ironic twist of fate, the box given to mankind was the last box to fall into evil hands.

    So... ground holes are best security measure?

    TrueLinkMoridin889H3KnucklesPhoenix-D
  • OctoberRavenOctoberRaven Plays fighting games for the story Skyeline Hotel Apartment 4ARegistered User regular
    edited March 24
    Of course, "just bury it in a hole" was also the plan for the planet H'lven, as their greatest warrior, Ch'p, aka The Chipmunk Green Lantern*, was hit by a yellow truck and died**

    *= Actual DC character
    **= Actually how he canonically died.

    OctoberRaven on
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  • dejavu,againdejavu,again Registered User regular
    V1m wrote: »
    Djiem wrote: »
    And just like with the One Ring, Man continues to disappoint.

    "OK sure, we're the one who taught Sauron how to make those rings, and we helped him make them, and we totally told everyone he was cool, but it's absolutely Men's fault what happened next. Also shut up about the Silmarils, that was probably all humans too. Definitely not our fault. Now we have to go be smug about how wise and pure we are in Valinor, because we're sure not clearing up the fucking mess here."

    "Also, that sweet island you were given as a gift because of the casualties you suffered at the hands of Morgoth, the gods will sink it if you try to come to Valinor. Because of your other 'gift' of mortality." Thanks, did either of those gifts come with a receipt?

  • TrueLinkTrueLink Registered User regular
    The search for the Mother Boxes doesn't make sense to me. Steppenwolf is reaching Earth after converting 20,000 out of his 70,000 planets for Darkside. You know he's got more Mother Boxes! Those things are to Steppenwolf what Kraft Macaroni & Cheese is to single parents.

    Or better yet -- he should show up, see the defenses the Amazons made and then laugh. "Fools! You're guarding Mother Boxes?! That's thousands of years old tech. I've got Unity on my phone now, and it's way faster."

  • LucascraftLucascraft Registered User regular
    I don't understand how Darkseid forgot which planet he lost the Motherboxes on.

    They showed his defeat. He flew away. In a spaceship. Surely those coordinates would have been in their logs or something.

    TrueLinkH3KnucklesZilla360Smrtnik
  • MaryAmeliaMaryAmelia Registered User regular
    V1m wrote: »
    Djiem wrote: »
    And just like with the One Ring, Man continues to disappoint.

    "OK sure, we're the one who taught Sauron how to make those rings, and we helped him make them, and we totally told everyone he was cool, but it's absolutely Men's fault what happened next. Also shut up about the Silmarils, that was probably all humans too. Definitely not our fault. Now we have to go be smug about how wise and pure we are in Valinor, because we're sure not clearing up the fucking mess here."

    "Also, that sweet island you were given as a gift because of the casualties you suffered at the hands of Morgoth, the gods will sink it if you try to come to Valinor. Because of your other 'gift' of mortality." Thanks, did either of those gifts come with a receipt?

    Oh and this ring wasn't destroyed a thousand years ago, when we had the Alliance of Elves and Men? Totally just because Men are weak. We are wise to live in golden forests and we kill everyone who comes near, and now that the world sucks again the asshole Men won't team up with us. Btw, we are wise because we eat organic food and saw two glowy trees, not because we live forever. Men should just die when they die, because that's a gift, but damn they are foolish and weak-hearted. Oh and also we go to the same place when we die, sucks for us.

  • HevachHevach Registered User regular
    Lucascraft wrote: »
    In an ironic twist of fate, the box given to mankind was the last box to fall into evil hands.

    So... ground holes are best security measure?

    Giant warrior temples are like huge beacons. There's obviously *something* important in there. Dig a hole in the middle of nowhere, stick your stuff in it, cover it, plant matching groundcover on the dirt patch, and kill the guy who dug the hole and bury him in a different hole far away, take the secret to your grave. There, boom, lost to memory and history and by the time anyone even figures out you buried it you're dead and it's not your problem.

    Rhesus PositiveH3KnucklesZilla360cB557SorceMoridin889Donnicton
  • qikinkqikink Registered User new member
    Hevach wrote: »
    ... There, boom, lost to memory and history and by the time anyone even figures out you buried it you're dead and it's not your problem.

    ENTER Stage Left - GOLLUM

    Zilla360dejavu,againRingoRhesus PositiveTofystedeth
  • HevachHevach Registered User regular
    edited March 24
    qikink wrote: »
    Hevach wrote: »
    ... There, boom, lost to memory and history and by the time anyone even figures out you buried it you're dead and it's not your problem.

    ENTER Stage Left - GOLLUM

    See, Isildur didn't bury it, he tossed it in a river.

    Still, he was dead and buried for like 2500 years before it turned up again, and 3000 before it became an issue. Somebody else's problem.

    Hevach on
    PreacherH3KnucklesZilla360cB557Man in the MistsRingoMoridin889Donnicton
  • DarkewolfeDarkewolfe Registered User regular
    What is this a reference to?

    What is this I don't even.
  • PreacherPreacher Registered User regular
    Darkewolfe wrote: »
    What is this a reference to?

    Justice league bigger longer uncut

    I would like some money because these are artisanal nuggets of wisdom philistine.

    Http:// pleasepaypreacher.net
    RingoDarkewolfeNothingAndy Joe
  • H3KnucklesH3Knuckles Jack of all interests... ...master of noneRegistered User regular
    edited March 24
    Watched the beginning of the Red Letter Media review, just enough to get the broad overview. They felt like it's a big improvement over the theatrical cut (though this seems to stem more from not being an 11th hour hackjob than the relative merits of the respective directors). More interestingly, they pointed out a few ways in which Snyder's cut had improved on some of the bigger complaints people had with Snyder's previous two DC flicks (Man of Steel and Batman vs Superman), calling into question the necessity of the efforts to change the tone & style for the theatrical release.

    The best part in my opinion is when they point out that right around the 2 hour mark, the movie has a 12-minute action scene that ends with the heroes having to escape and figure out what's next. Part of the drive for the theatrical release making so many changes was supposedly the 4 hour run time of Snyder's version, and yet it somehow eluded all the studio people that they could've just cut the whole thing in half with a 'to be continued' and made twice as much money.

    H3Knuckles on
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  • LucascraftLucascraft Registered User regular
    I'm a pretty big Snyder critic. I've said multiple times here on the Penny Arcade forums (and elsewhere too) that Snyder sucks, and I stand by that.

    But I actually liked the Snyder Cut of the movie. At least, I liked it better than the theatrical cut. It still isn't perfect, and it still has some rather dumb plot holes (see my post above about Darkseid forgetting which planet he left the motherboxes on), and Zack Snyder still doesn't understand Superman as a character. But it was better. I didn't hate it, and I was entertained. There. I said it. Are you happy now, Zack Snyder? I know you care about my opinion very much and I just admitted that you entertained me.

    H3KnucklesRingoDonnicton
  • HevachHevach Registered User regular
    "Better than the theatrical cut" doesn't say much. I mean, the Snyder cut is a bad movie, but it's just ONE bad movie. The theatrical version was two bad movies awkwardly stuck together like that bookshelf I built my wife.

    Hahnsoo1
  • Zoku GojiraZoku Gojira Monster IslandRegistered User regular
    edited March 25
    "In other news tonight, a mystical box of unknown origin and the missing remains of King Gerald I were unearthed today from the same car park in a London suburb."

    Zoku Gojira on
    "Because things are the way they are, things will not stay the way they are." - Bertolt Brecht
    H3Knuckles
  • Golden YakGolden Yak Burnished Bovine The PIT, level 26Registered User regular
    "We threw some dirt over it though, should be good."

    H9f4bVe.png
    H3Knuckles
  • SirBillSirBill Denver, CORegistered User regular
    For some reason I just can't stop myself from coming back and reading this comic over and over again, laughing each time.

    islington
  • T-DangerT-Danger Registered User regular
    And yet no one points out, "Wait, why are we protecting these things at all if they're that dangerous? If we're not going to use them, we should just destroy them."

  • DjiemDjiem Registered User regular
    T-Danger wrote: »
    And yet no one points out, "Wait, why are we protecting these things at all if they're that dangerous? If we're not going to use them, we should just destroy them."

    The boxes cannot be destroyed, T-Danger, son of S-Danger, by any means we possess.

  • islingtonislington Registered User regular
    SirBill wrote: »
    For some reason I just can't stop myself from coming back and reading this comic over and over again, laughing each time.

    It's Bjorn, he just keeps giving.

  • Steel AngelSteel Angel Registered User regular
    islington wrote: »
    SirBill wrote: »
    For some reason I just can't stop myself from coming back and reading this comic over and over again, laughing each time.

    It's Bjorn, he just keeps giving.

    He looks guilty, but not guilty enough to do a better job.

    Fuck Bjorn.

    Big Dookie wrote: »
    I found that tilting it doesn't work very well, and once I started jerking it, I got much better results.

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  • V1mV1m Registered User regular
    Maybe it wasn't a job that he wanted

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