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Mike Rowe Has Never Worked In A Video Store {Your Worst Job Thread}
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I worked as an ASM for Movie Gallery for a year. By far the worst job I've ever had. And it was in Colorado, so it was even worse. Here I will regale you with some stories from said job.
This Happens Every Week
It is 7PM on a Saturday. There are 50 to 75 people in the store at any given time. We have two people clocked in, because my fuckmuppet manager is trying to stay under the retarded hours allotment so he can get his $10 bonus for the week.
I have a line of about 15 to 20 people constantly. I'm moving along at a decent clip, getting two to three people rang out per minute. And someone invariably comes in an asks "Do you have Fat Albert in?"
I know three things about this person:
1) Their taste sucks. It is always the horrible "garbage in, garbage out" feature that has come in that week that people want. They never asked for Blade Runner or anything halfway fucking decent.
2) They are a lazy fuck. We'll get to that in a second.
3) They are apparently blind. If I see a clerk being bombarded by people during their busiest time of the day, I try to research my query before springing it on them.
This conversation occurs:
"Probably. We got a bunch in."
"Well can you check before I look?"
"Not right now, no. The new release wall is in alphabetical order. I just checked everything in, so everything I have will be out there."
They sigh. "Well, there is it?"
I'm getting rather perturbed. "After E and before G, one would think."
Now I get their most withering look, which compresses their mong face into a scowl and drops their IQ 20 more points. "Well, what general area for Chrissakes???"
I finally give up and point to the area. Some people would actually ask me to walk them over to the movie.
The Porn Room
We had an adult room, which did a decent business in a town of ex-cons and meth addicts. The room has a buzzer installed, so we knew when someone was heading back there so we could keep watch via security camera. People inherently tried to sneak by the buzzer because they were ashamed of their porn habit.
Unfortunately, it was my job to stock said room. Most people would be excited about this prospect. I fucking hated it.
Because of the nature of the content I had to open all boxes and price the merchandise back in the room. So when a customer asks me if they have any "TS rape" DVDs in while I'm doing all of this by myself, you can see the cause of my apprehension. I just wanted to get out of there without having a size eight asshole.
Also, one night about 11 PM a young couple with a kid who was about 5 years old come in. They wander around for a while, then I hear the buzzer go off. Both parents are in the adult room. The kid is wandering around the store by himself. I'm willing to let this slide as long as the kid behaves himself, which it looks like he's doing for the moment. No need to get in an argument over their suspect parenting techniques.
That is until I hear "Bobby, get you ass over here, NOW!" They called their son into the porn room with them.
I almost broke my neck getting back there to tell them to get the righteous fuck out of my store, post-haste.
And, after doing inventory on a room filled with DVDs of women fucking balloons and drinking cum out of other women's assholes, you tend to go home in a decidedly non-sexy mood. Inventory would destroy my sex life for three days, minimum.
So, SE, what was the worst job you've ever had to endure?
This Happens Every Week
It is 7PM on a Saturday. There are 50 to 75 people in the store at any given time. We have two people clocked in, because my fuckmuppet manager is trying to stay under the retarded hours allotment so he can get his $10 bonus for the week.
I have a line of about 15 to 20 people constantly. I'm moving along at a decent clip, getting two to three people rang out per minute. And someone invariably comes in an asks "Do you have Fat Albert in?"
I know three things about this person:
1) Their taste sucks. It is always the horrible "garbage in, garbage out" feature that has come in that week that people want. They never asked for Blade Runner or anything halfway fucking decent.
2) They are a lazy fuck. We'll get to that in a second.
3) They are apparently blind. If I see a clerk being bombarded by people during their busiest time of the day, I try to research my query before springing it on them.
This conversation occurs:
"Probably. We got a bunch in."
"Well can you check before I look?"
"Not right now, no. The new release wall is in alphabetical order. I just checked everything in, so everything I have will be out there."
They sigh. "Well, there is it?"
I'm getting rather perturbed. "After E and before G, one would think."
Now I get their most withering look, which compresses their mong face into a scowl and drops their IQ 20 more points. "Well, what general area for Chrissakes???"
I finally give up and point to the area. Some people would actually ask me to walk them over to the movie.
The Porn Room
We had an adult room, which did a decent business in a town of ex-cons and meth addicts. The room has a buzzer installed, so we knew when someone was heading back there so we could keep watch via security camera. People inherently tried to sneak by the buzzer because they were ashamed of their porn habit.
Unfortunately, it was my job to stock said room. Most people would be excited about this prospect. I fucking hated it.
Because of the nature of the content I had to open all boxes and price the merchandise back in the room. So when a customer asks me if they have any "TS rape" DVDs in while I'm doing all of this by myself, you can see the cause of my apprehension. I just wanted to get out of there without having a size eight asshole.
Also, one night about 11 PM a young couple with a kid who was about 5 years old come in. They wander around for a while, then I hear the buzzer go off. Both parents are in the adult room. The kid is wandering around the store by himself. I'm willing to let this slide as long as the kid behaves himself, which it looks like he's doing for the moment. No need to get in an argument over their suspect parenting techniques.
That is until I hear "Bobby, get you ass over here, NOW!" They called their son into the porn room with them.
I almost broke my neck getting back there to tell them to get the righteous fuck out of my store, post-haste.
And, after doing inventory on a room filled with DVDs of women fucking balloons and drinking cum out of other women's assholes, you tend to go home in a decidedly non-sexy mood. Inventory would destroy my sex life for three days, minimum.
So, SE, what was the worst job you've ever had to endure?
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Worked for 5 hours every night surrounded by blindingly hot water, various cleaning chemical mixtures that would invariably mix with the steam of the water, a floor so slick with years-old grease that you could slide across it a la Risky Business with full tread shoes on for $7 an hour.
Though I did get a call from a dude once and he demanded to get the "veteran's discount". That was kinda shitty.
And the time I worked for 12 hours straight, with no breaks while some of my co-workers took a smoke break every 30 minutes. Also, there was only one chair in the whole building, and that was in the manager's office.
PARKER, YOU'RE FIRED! <-- My comic book podcast! Satan look here!
I glued the rocks to the balcony.
There was no shade.
It was 45 degrees.
It was so hot I when sweat and the sweat hit the rocks it evaporated in about 1.5 seconds.
My knuckles got sunburnt.
It was pretty shit
Satans..... hints.....
I got there during the rush when everybody is buying textbooks.
There's this retarded rule that you're not allowed to bring any sort of bag inside the store.
I was put outside, standing under a tent, taking peoples bags.
For 6 hours. Every day for a week.
Then, when it was finally done. To add a final bit of pain, they laid me off once they didn't need a bag-taker.
A nice little prison farm named Canon City. Basically a Dennys surrounded by 4 medium security prisons and a Supermax.
man, how does that work?
PARKER, YOU'RE FIRED! <-- My comic book podcast! Satan look here!
there's a rad chinese restaurant there
College, sorry, I always misspell that word for some reason.
Basically it's where the students buy their overpriced textbooks.
So, yeah, I'm a pussy.
The one on main street? I can't remember the name of the motherfucker, but it was pretty damn good.
Ya ya, everyone hates New York...
That is pretty far south. And southern Colorado sucks a bunch. So, sorry, I suppose.
i think so
we stopped in canon city on our way back from mew mexico and had chinese
and the place was awesome
no idea what it was called
As we all are compared to this...
I've been there. Not to that Dennys, but I've driven through that town.
B.net: Kusanku
mew mexico
It think it was like Dragon Gate or something. Had a gold plated Buddha in the foyer. Only worthwhile restaurant in the whole town.
I'm assuming it wasn't wads of money.
Let's say I know what's in those blue sacks they throw into the biohazard containers, because they kept fucking opening while transporting them
oh, you mean the candybox!
Sister state to Connecticat
raspberry tea bags
Is that the kind of subway that has the bulletproof-glass partition that you have to slide money into the drawer for?
I went to a Subway in north St. Louis like that (at Natural Bridge and Kingshighway, for any Nelly fans) and not only was there glass between me and the cold cuts, but there were already gun shot fractures in the glass.
SE++ Map Steam
There are subways without that?
I would disagree Knob because a Sgt of one of the other fireteams would say thier is no sweeter Job
His quote of
My worst job was working in a Casino they had the rule book they played like Calvinball when they had to enforce it I could go on and on about how much I hated that place
They paid well but that barely covered up the fact I was the only white man in a indian casino used by hispanics. Racsim was so much fun to deal with
all our subways are just a counter with a dumb highschool girl and dell meat
no psychotic fucking security
I have worked in some pretty hostile areas and I still hate going on a subway. I feel i should have my M4, my IBA and sometimes my gasmask just to be on the safe side.
Such a fucking disgusting job.
Wow. Sounds like a great place to be.