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[Cards Against Humanity] Christmas Hangout Edition. YaYa Wins.

13

Posts

  • Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    A nun works well in a pitch if you don't have Madea to keep them kids on the straight and narrow.

    @jdarksun is the Card Santa

    The new Black Card is: What's a girl's best friend?

    PM me your answers while jdarksun rolls out the chocolate and his copy of Sister's Act 3.

  • Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    edited January 2014
    Great Eyeliner, Fabulous Shoes, A Man with a Large Bank Account. Me? Cynical? Don't be ridiculous.

    What's a girl's best friend? A monkey smoking a cigar (YaYa)
    What's a girl's best friend? Emotions (facetious)
    What's a girl's best friend? Insatiable Bloodlust (Dr. Flamingo)
    What's a girl's best friend? Children on leashes (Man in the Mists)
    What's a girl's best friend? Getting naked and watching Nickelodeon (Goose!)
    What's a girl's best friend? Ryan Gosling riding in on a white horse (Stilts: Winner)
    What's a girl's best friend? Licking things to claim them as your own (see317)

    So what is your best friend @jdarksun?

    Grunt's Ghosts on
  • jdarksunjdarksun Struggler CORegistered User regular
    What's a girl's best friend? Ryan Gosling riding in on a white horse

    swoooooon

  • Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    I just found your erotica about him... Yeah. Maybe @Stilts would like them.

    Stilts is the Card Santa

    The new Black Card is: What does Dick Cheney prefer?

    PM me which romcom Dick likes while Stilts avoids buckshot to the face for not picking George Clooney.

  • Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    edited January 2014
    Someone should have a Fox News white card made. It would be great for this question.

    What does Dick Cheney prefer? Dick Cheney (Dr. Flamingo: Winner)
    What does Dick Cheney prefer? Peeing a little bit (Man in the Mists)
    What does Dick Cheney prefer? Taking a man's eyes and balls out and putting his eyes where his balls go and then his balls in the eye holes (Goose!)
    What does Dick Cheney prefer? Helplessly giggling at the mention of Hutus and Tutsis (facetious)
    What does Dick Cheney prefer? Civilian Casualties (YaYa)
    What does Dick Cheney prefer? Former President George W. Bush (see317)
    What does Dick Cheney prefer? Revenge fucking (jdarksun)

    What is the Old Dick's favorite thing, @Stilts ?

    Grunt's Ghosts on
  • jdarksunjdarksun Struggler CORegistered User regular
    So much win.

  • StiltsStilts Registered User regular
    jdarksun wrote: »
    So much win.

    No kidding.

    Some solid choices here, but I really love the simplicity and truthiness of "Dick Cheney."

    Runners-up: "civilian casualties" and "former President George W. Bush"

    IKknkhU.gif
  • see317see317 Registered User regular
    REally makes me wish there were points for being a runner up.

  • Man in the MistsMan in the Mists Registered User regular
    Clearly, Dick Cheney was an auto-win card this round.

  • Dr. FlamingoDr. Flamingo 49 Gilded Disc Perceives the Sun Registered User regular
    One time that question came up in a game and I had the Dick Cheney card in hand... Aaaaaaand I was the Card Czar that round.

  • Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    Don't brag about winning a war when there are still cards in hands @Dr. Flamingo.

    Dr. Flamingo is the Card Santa this round, but remember @Stilts has 4 out of the 5 points he (she? it?) needs to win.

    The new Black Card is: But before I kill you, Mr. Bond, I must show you __________.

    PM me your answers while the Dr. Flamingo calibrates his Death Ray on the Moon.

  • Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    edited January 2014
    This summer, see 007 survive the worst of humanity and get the girl.

    But before I kill you, Mr. Bond, I must show you A Powerpoint Presentation. (YaYa)
    But before I kill you, Mr. Bond, I must show you Special musical guest, Cher. (jdarksun: Winner)
    But before I kill you, Mr. Bond, I must show you Half-assed foreplay. (facetious)
    But before I kill you, Mr. Bond, I must show you Mufasa's death scene. (Man in the Mists)
    But before I kill you, Mr. Bond, I must show you My humps. (see317)
    But before I kill you, Mr. Bond, I must show you the "Bring It On" pentalogy. (Stilts)
    But before I kill you, Mr. Bond, I must show you mopey zoo lion. (Goose!)

    How will you kill James Bond and finally take over the world, @Dr. Flamingo?

    Grunt's Ghosts on
  • KaneskiKaneski Registered User regular
    edited January 2014
    Hah!

    Kaneski on
  • Dr. FlamingoDr. Flamingo 49 Gilded Disc Perceives the Sun Registered User regular
    Hm, definitely Cher.

  • Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    edited January 2014
    Do you believe in life after love? I can hear the buzz of my death beam saying that you really aren't strong enough OH!

    >.>

    @jdarksun is the new Card Santa

    The new Black Card is: I'm not like the rest of you. I'm too rich and busy for ___________.

    PM me your answers while jdarksun and Cher run off on a magical spy mission.

    Grunt's Ghosts on
  • Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    @YaYa must think he's too rich and busy to PM me.

  • Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    I'm too good to update this game anymore. Find a nerd to do it.

    I'm not like the rest of you. I'm too rich and busy for MY EX-WIFE.
    I'm not like the rest of you. I'm too rich and busy for dry heaving.
    I'm not like the rest of you. I'm too rich and busy for Leprosy.
    I'm not like the rest of you. I'm too rich and busy for Grandma.
    I'm not like the rest of you. I'm too rich and busy for Inappropriate yodeling.
    I'm not like the rest of you. I'm too rich and busy for existing.
    I'm not like the rest of you. I'm too rich and busy for whining like a little bitch.

    Not that I care but what are you too busy to do now that you are famous, @jdarksun?

  • jdarksunjdarksun Struggler CORegistered User regular
    I'm not like the rest of you. I'm too rich and busy for MY EX-WIFE.


    It's easier lie to tell one's self.

  • Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    You are until the alimony hits you.

    @YaYa is the Card Santa

    The new Black Card is: Why am I sticky?

    PM me your answers and we'll see if we can get YaYa cleaned up before court.

  • Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular

    Looks like they got in a... sticky situation. AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!

    Why am I sticky? A disappointing birthday party
    Why am I sticky? Consensual sex
    Why am I sticky? Full Frontal Nudity
    Why am I sticky? Pabst blue ribbon
    Why am I sticky? Filling every orifice with butterscotch pudding
    Why am I sticky? Edible underpants
    Why am I sticky? Golden showers

    What mess did you get into this time @YaYa?

  • YaYaYaYa Decent. Registered User regular
    Butterscotch pudding is the best and most obvious cause of my stickiness

  • Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    There are a few of this cards that make me go "The hell where you thinking?" @Man in the Mists just played one.

    Man in the Mists is the card santa

    The new Black Card is: Money can't buy me love, but it can buy me _______.

    PM me your cards while Man in the Mists calculates how much an enema will cost to clear butterscotch from harder to reach areas.

  • Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    edited January 2014
    Sorry I havent updated. Work is killing me, computer is dead, and its snowing (freezing rain kinda). I could use some money.

    Money can't buy me love, but it can buy me Man in the Mists.
    Money can't buy me love, but it can buy me hot cheese.
    Money can't buy me love, but it can buy me a sweet spaceship.
    Money can't buy me love, but it can buy me Preteens.
    Money can't buy me love, but it can buy me a slightly shitter parallel universe.
    Money can't buy me love, but it can buy me Weapons-grade plutonium..
    Money can't buy me love, but it can buy me Panda sex.

    So what's in your wallet @Man inthe Mists?

    Grunt's Ghosts on
  • tzeentchlingtzeentchling Doctor of Rocks OaklandRegistered User regular
    Oh, if only money could buy me panda sex....

  • Man in the MistsMan in the Mists Registered User regular
    Maybe we can find you a panda planet, tzeentchling. We'll go there in my sweet space ride.

  • Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    And you also get @Goose! as a new alien space roommate. Or maybe that's the drugs talking.

    Speaking of drugs: Goose! Is the new Card Santa

    The new Black Card is: What's my anti-drug?

    Pm me your answer while we rush Goose! to rehab. He said No, no, no.

  • ElvenshaeElvenshae Registered User regular
    tzeentchling wrote: »
    Oh, if only money could buy me panda sex....

    As someone who has spent a lot of time at the National Zoo, I can assure that not even millions of dollars will guarantee panda sex.

    omgbfz5lzi1s.png
    Steam: Elvenshae // PSN: Elvenshae // WotC: Elvenshae
    Wilds of Aladrion: [https://forums.penny-arcade.com/discussion/comment/43159014/#Comment_43159014]Ellandryn[/url]
  • Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    Poor @Stilts. Once you where playing CAH, then you started doing the hard stuff. Come back to us. We miss you.

  • Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    And you wish you could quit cause
    You're really sick of it but you're
    On drugs

    What's my anti-drug? An icepick lobotomy
    What's my anti-drug? Chugging a lava lamplamp
    What's my anti-drug? Dropping a chandelier on your enemies and riding the rope up
    What's my anti-drug? Winking at old people
    What's my anti-drug? Michael Jackson
    What's my anti-drug? Racism
    What's my anti-drug? Goose!

    What keeps you on the straight and narrow, @Goose!

  • Goose!Goose! That's me, honey Show me the way home, honeyRegistered User regular
    I will take 100% for everyone's sobriety forever. Congrats, vanity pick wins.

  • Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    Scores are updated in the OP but not the cards used to get them. @YaYa scared me too much with a picture of Goose! naked on a bearskin rug playing the saxophone.

    YaYa is the Card Santa.

    The new Black Card is: Dear Abby, I'm having trouble with _____ and would like your advice.

    PM me your cards while YaYa asks for help on picking as 2 of them could end the game and 3 will create a 4 way tie for first.

  • Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    Dear Abby, I'm having trouble with @Stilts not giving me a card and would like your advice.

  • Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    Some of this got pass an editor? JJJ is slipping.

    Dear Abby, I'm having trouble with Hipsters and would like your advice.
    Dear Abby, I'm having trouble with A stray pube and would like your advice.
    Dear Abby, I'm having trouble with Nazis and would like your advice.
    Dear Abby, I'm having trouble with Panty Raids and would like your advice.
    Dear Abby, I'm having trouble with Laying a egg and would like your advice.
    Dear Abby, I'm having trouble with A murder most foul and would like your advice.
    Dear Abby, I'm having trouble with All my friends dying and would like your advice.

    What advice will you give now Abby @YaYa?

  • YaYaYaYa Decent. Registered User regular
    edited February 2014
    when all your friends are dying, your best hope is to make only enemies

    YaYa on
  • Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    Well, @see317 you might want to stop stabbing them in the back if you want to keep friends around.

    see317 is the Card Santa.

    The new Black Card is: What's there a ton of in heaven?

    Send me your cards while see317 sees how many of his friends are up there.

  • see317see317 Registered User regular
    I was just thinking that anyone who still read Dear Abby was probably facing that problem through natural causes.

  • Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    Dear God, its me. Grunt. Yeah, that guy. Anyways, I know @Goose! and @YaYa are busy in heaven but if they could give me a card that would be great.

    Oh, and world peace, feed the hungry kids, and forgive me for Saturday. And if you could cure this rash I got Saturday, that would be great.

    Amen.

  • discriderdiscrider Registered User regular
    I'd say that the "All my friends dying" should've been held for this card, if it hadn't won the last round.

    Steam Community page: http://steamcommunity.com/id/discrider/
  • Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    Heaven seems busy. Mrs. DeeTen wants to live forever.

    What's there a ton of in heaven? The gays
    What's there a ton of in heaven? Friendly fire
    What's there a ton of in heaven? Historical revisionism
    What's there a ton of in heaven? Frolicking
    What's there a ton of in heaven? Child beauty pageants
    What's there a ton of in heaven? Bill Clinton, naked on a bearskin rug with a saxophone
    What's there a ton of in heaven? A black male in his early 20s last seen wearing a hoodie

    All dogs might go to heaven, but what fills its masses @see317

  • see317see317 Registered User regular
    edited February 2014
    This is a hard one, but I now have it on good authority that there's a lot of historical revisionism going on up there.

    see317 on
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Penny Arcade Forums› Critical Failures