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[Steam] April showers bring May Birthdays

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Posts

  • destroyah87destroyah87 Registered User regular
    edited May 11
    TheStig wrote: »
    Fairchild wrote: »
    What's truly disturbing is that I am absolutely sure there is porn out there that involves eating turtles.

    Does my erotic ninja turtles fanfic count?

    So, here's the thing,
    According to the late 90s live action TMNT TV show, while we all thought there were only four turtles that were exposed to the mutagenic "ooze" that created the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, in reality there were actually a fifth turtle, who was female. Splinter missed her when he collected the four, and she crawled around in the New York City sewers for a while until she was found by a wizard (who was also a ninja). He took her to China, and taught her how to fight. Later on the ninja wizard and Splinter had a psychic connection and they both found out about the other turtles.

    After a while the wizard ninja dies, and the female turtle goes to New York City to meet the Ninja Turtles. They find out that while they all assumed that they were brothers, none of them were related to each other at all, laying the groundwork for some red hot inter-turtle action. Humanoid mutated turtles fucking is totally fine, but we gotta draw the line at humanoid mutated turtle incest.

    Anyway, the main thing I want you to take from this is not to let your dreams be dreams, your erotic ninja turtles fanfic could technically be canon.

    The only reason I actually know this dumb shit is because I used to babysit a friend's kids who were big TMNT fans, and when they found out that I also liked the Ninja Turtles when I was a kid they showed me the live action TV show and I was confused as hell and read up about it.

    I wish they'd bring the old sidescrolling beat'emups to Steam.

    And those turtles fought the Power Rangers. (In Space)

    destroyah87 on
    steam_sig.png
    HevachSmokeStacksBetsuniRoyceSraphimElvenshae
  • HevachHevach Registered User regular
    edited May 11
    TheStig wrote: »
    Fairchild wrote: »
    What's truly disturbing is that I am absolutely sure there is porn out there that involves eating turtles.

    Does my erotic ninja turtles fanfic count?

    So, here's the thing,
    According to the late 90s live action TMNT TV show, while we all thought there were only four turtles that were exposed to the mutagenic "ooze" that created the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, in reality there were actually a fifth turtle, who was female. Splinter missed her when he collected the four, and she crawled around in the New York City sewers for a while until she was found by a wizard (who was also a ninja). He took her to China, and taught her how to fight. Later on the ninja wizard and Splinter had a psychic connection and they both found out about the other turtles.

    After a while the wizard ninja dies, and the female turtle goes to New York City to meet the Ninja Turtles. They find out that while they all assumed that they were brothers, none of them were related to each other at all, laying the groundwork for some red hot inter-turtle action. Humanoid mutated turtles fucking is totally fine, but we gotta draw the line at humanoid mutated turtle incest.

    Anyway, the main thing I want you to take from this is not to let your dreams be dreams, your erotic ninja turtles fanfic could technically be canon.

    The only reason I actually know this dumb shit is because I used to babysit a friend's kids who were big TMNT fans, and when they found out that I also liked the Ninja Turtles when I was a kid they showed me the live action TV show and I was confused as hell and read up about it.

    I wish they'd bring the old sidescrolling beat'emups to Steam.

    I'd loved the live action movies enough to actually watch the first episode of that, despite being like 16 when it came out, because it was approximately a continuation of the movies (such as them living in the abandoned subway station after their sewer lair was destroyed). It was... Really bad, and the older I've gotten the more things I've found bad about it on reflection.
    Splinter named the female turtle Venus de Milo, after a work of art (not an artist as he did with the male turtles). That's one that didn't quite hit me until like twenty years later. She didn't get her own signature color (she was a slightly paler blue than Leonardo) or weapon. She was a complete ditz, without Michelangelo's wit to make up for it. And the first episode dedicated like nine minutes of runtime to establishing that she wasn't related to any of the others by blood, and most of the rest to the guys competing to impress her (while explaining that she wasn't *really* their sister so this was ok).

    She is officially stricken from canon. Even the four half-naked time traveling monks from TMNT3 didn't earn that fate. Venus alone was utterly erased from being.

    Hevach on
    SmokeStacksdestroyah87RoyceSraphim
  • Raiden333Raiden333 Registered User regular
    @Big Classy Thanks a bunch for the early b-day present (or technically not because of Timezones) of Shape of the World, it looks pretty trippy, looking forward to trying it out!

    steam_sig.png
    Ianatordestroyah87KalnaurDonnictonJazzKarozGear GirlBetsuniJaysonFourTetraRayPixelated PixieElvenshaean_altTalus9952
  • DonnictonDonnicton Hey it's me, your old pal Movie Sonic - let me in. LEMME IN. Registered User regular
    Highest security bank in Prague?

    More like Adam Jenson's new playground.

    SmokeStacksbloodatonementJazzKarozRoyceSraphimCommander ZoomCroakerBCTalus9952
  • RoyceSraphimRoyceSraphim Registered User regular
    I'm going to restart this game and make the Sunrider a force to be feared

    *watches every unit at pirate base open fire on my flagship*

  • Pixelated PixiePixelated Pixie Future world ruler Registered User regular
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    @JaysonFour strikes with some preemptive birthday madness.

    DLCs! Woo! No backlog! Thanks for the Nubians and Forgotten Gods! <3 <3 <3

    destroyah87BetsuniKalnaurTetraRayRoyceSraphimIanatorJazzEd GrubermanStormwatcherMugsleyan_altGear GirlTalus9952
  • FencingsaxFencingsax It is difficult to get a man to understand, when his salary depends upon his not understanding GNU Terry PratchettRegistered User regular
    So I started MGSV. I am just ignoring the story, but once the actual game gets going, it seems like it might be fun.

    torchlight-sig-80.jpg
  • DarkPrimusDarkPrimus Registered User regular
    Fencingsax wrote: »
    So I started MGSV. I am just ignoring the story, but once the actual game gets going, it seems like it might be fun.

    The story is mostly stupid garbage but it has some really cool stuff near the back half.

    The gameplay is exceptional.

    wpyz0Y5.png
    Gamertag: PrimusD | Rock Band DLC | GW:OttW - arrcd | WLD - Thortar
    Aistancj iwakuraStormwatcher
  • AistanAistan Registered User regular
    Later on you can play as one of your soldiers and not be dumb ol venom snake as well.

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  • FencingsaxFencingsax It is difficult to get a man to understand, when his salary depends upon his not understanding GNU Terry PratchettRegistered User regular
    DarkPrimus wrote: »
    Fencingsax wrote: »
    So I started MGSV. I am just ignoring the story, but once the actual game gets going, it seems like it might be fun.

    The story is mostly stupid garbage but it has some really cool stuff near the back half.

    The gameplay is exceptional.

    I already know the storybeats and the punchline, and I frankly really don't want to pay attention to that

    torchlight-sig-80.jpg
  • KarozKaroz Registered User regular
    Really nice birthday today with some gifts on top.
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    Thanks to @destroyah87 @JaysonFour and @Big Classy for the Subnautica Below Zero, The Hex, and Sairento VR respectively.

    Thanks to you all for making this a special community. :heartbeat:

    KalnaurPoketpixieRoyceSraphimIanatorJazzPixelated PixieEd GrubermanElvenshaeMNC Doverdestroyah87BetsuniBedlamTetraRayCorsiniMadicanJaysonFourMugsleyan_altGear Girl
  • -Loki--Loki- Don't pee in my mouth and tell me it's raining. Registered User regular
    edited May 12
    You know, I really wish Steam had the ability to add a 'sort as' name to games. It bugs the shit out of me when I see games in a series out of order. Like I have Borderlands 2>Borderlands GOTY>Borderlands The Pre Sequel. Would be nice if they added a sort as name in each games settings, so I could change them to Borderlands GOTY>Borderlands 2>Borderlands The Pre Sequel. Or the irritating Tomb Raider situation, where none are in their chronological release order (Rise of the Tomb Raider>Shadow of the Tomb Raider>Tomb Raider), which gets worse if you have any other games that fall between those first few letters.

    -Loki- on
    Jazz
  • JazzJazz UKRegistered User regular
    edited May 12
    -Loki- wrote: »
    You know, I really wish Steam had the ability to add a 'sort as' name to games. It bugs the shit out of me when I see games in a series out of order. Like I have Borderlands 2>Borderlands GOTY>Borderlands The Pre Sequel. Would be nice if they added a sort as name in each games settings, so I could change them to Borderlands GOTY>Borderlands 2>Borderlands The Pre Sequel. Or the irritating Tomb Raider situation, where none are in their chronological release order (Rise of the Tomb Raider>Shadow of the Tomb Raider>Tomb Raider), which gets worse if you have any other games that fall between those first letters.

    That would be amazing. Some series' already do that anyway (Hitman leaps to mind, at least the old ones, which actually do show up in chronological release order, not alphabetical), so the functionality exists somewhere in the back-end, even if it's not user-definable.

    Edit: screengrab from my Steam library:

    4g91r2btmyib.jpg

    The new games don't follow it (I don't have new Hitman 2, as you can see, but I'm guessing it would be after new Hitman 1), but the old series games are listed in chronological order.

    Jazz on
    RoyceSraphim
  • cj iwakuracj iwakura The Rhythm Regent Chantry of NightmaresRegistered User regular
    Fencingsax wrote: »
    DarkPrimus wrote: »
    Fencingsax wrote: »
    So I started MGSV. I am just ignoring the story, but once the actual game gets going, it seems like it might be fun.

    The story is mostly stupid garbage but it has some really cool stuff near the back half.

    The gameplay is exceptional.

    I already know the storybeats and the punchline, and I frankly really don't want to pay attention to that

    I liked the story. It's messy, but it definitely had its moments.

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    Well, good morning. Welcome to the new scenario. What should we do today?
    Prohass
  • StormwatcherStormwatcher Blegh BlughRegistered User regular
    -Loki- wrote: »
    You know, I really wish Steam had the ability to add a 'sort as' name to games. It bugs the shit out of me when I see games in a series out of order. Like I have Borderlands 2>Borderlands GOTY>Borderlands The Pre Sequel. Would be nice if they added a sort as name in each games settings, so I could change them to Borderlands GOTY>Borderlands 2>Borderlands The Pre Sequel. Or the irritating Tomb Raider situation, where none are in their chronological release order (Rise of the Tomb Raider>Shadow of the Tomb Raider>Tomb Raider), which gets worse if you have any other games that fall between those first few letters.

    uplay lists all their series in release order :D

    Steam: Stormwatcher | PSN: Stormwatcher33 | Switch: 5961-4777-3491
    camo_sig2.png
    Kalnaur
  • SmokeStacksSmokeStacks The Myth, the Legend, the Bowman, the Shambler FuckerRegistered User regular
    If you own the classic games the Tomb Raider situation gets even goofier.

    Also, I basically have a sub-library of games that all begin with TOM CLANCY'S [GAME NAME] thanks to irresponsible bundle purchases.

    73CQcJZ.png
    StormwatcherElvenshae
  • JazzJazz UKRegistered User regular
    Deus Ex is almost in the right order. For some reason it has The Missing Link (Human Revolution's DLC) listed before Human Revolution itself. Otherwise it's in the right order.

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  • DarkPrimusDarkPrimus Registered User regular
    Jazz wrote: »
    Deus Ex is almost in the right order. For some reason it has The Missing Link (Human Revolution's DLC) listed before Human Revolution itself. Otherwise it's in the right order.

    qdxi0c9m3p8m.jpg

    But I mean, you'd just play the Director's Cut which has it integrated, right?

    wpyz0Y5.png
    Gamertag: PrimusD | Rock Band DLC | GW:OttW - arrcd | WLD - Thortar
    Drovek
  • JazzJazz UKRegistered User regular
    DarkPrimus wrote: »
    Jazz wrote: »
    Deus Ex is almost in the right order. For some reason it has The Missing Link (Human Revolution's DLC) listed before Human Revolution itself. Otherwise it's in the right order.

    qdxi0c9m3p8m.jpg

    But I mean, you'd just play the Director's Cut which has it integrated, right?

    vn6bx7zcv11w.jpg

    And is the only way you can buy it on PC now. But not the point!

  • FairchildFairchild Rabbit used short words that were easy to understand, like "Hello Pooh, how about Lunch ?" Registered User regular
    Playing the Steam version of ARKHAM: Origins GOTY now, the first of the ARKHAM series of games without Kevin Conroy doing Batman's voice, which is rather jarring. The game loads with all of your Alternate keybindings set to 'Left Mouse Button' which means, guess what ? that none of the mouse commands work, until you go into Options and reset ALL OF THE ALTERNATE KEYBINDINGS to something else. Woo hoo !

    I remember this happening with the PC version of Origins at launch, too, but I was a younger, more foolish person back then and it took me a long time, including deleting and re-installing the game, to figure out what the problem was.

  • Raiden333Raiden333 Registered User regular
    Thanks to @destroyah87 for Dawn of Man, seems like a pretty chill management game!

    You know, until the bears show up.

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    IanatorKalnaurJazzdestroyah87TetraRayBetsuniKarozElvenshaeBig ClassyMugsleyan_altGear GirlKoopahTroopahTalus9952
  • Raiden333Raiden333 Registered User regular
    Yeah okay this is my jam
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    destroyah87KarozJazzElvenshaeRoyceSraphimBetsuniMugsleyPoketpixieKoopahTroopah
  • CroakerBCCroakerBC YorkRegistered User regular
    So, I've just wrapped up my first playthrough of Heaven's Vault. I'll open with this: I thought it was great. I absolutely did.
    But, you're asking, what is it? Well, it's a point-and-click adventure, where you go along with archaeologist Aliyah as she investigates the aforesaid Vault. What is it? Where is it? What does it do? Why has another investigation ended in a mysterious death? These are all questions floating through the narrative, and some of them are even answered. Maybe all of them are, and maybe I just didn't know it.

    That's thanks to the central mechanic of Heaven's Vault - translations. As Aliyah walks through the vividly realised worlds, moving from shattered mausoleums to thriving markets on the back of interstellar rivers, she tends to run across ruins and artifacts. Examining these tends to yield up inscriptions, written in a language that no-one now speaks. Your first inscription may be simple - three symbols, with options provided for each one. You make your selections to gain a phrase, to gain a little more context in the world, to get a handle on the history, on the story of the places Aliyah finds herself. And the next inscription might include those same symbols, and now your guesses help make sense of a larger piece - or not. It took me quite a while to figure out that a particular glyph meant 'if', for example. And in the meantime, my other translations made less sense, and I gleaned fewer clues than I might have.

    It's a fun mechanic, and the way it exposes you to the lore and the plot over time is really quite clever. If Lara Croft is the action archaeologist, blowing up every temple she comes across, Aliyah is the more cerebral - cautious, sarcastic, fiercely individual - and fascinated by the past, approaching every new inscription with enthusiasm and curiosity.

    The world she inhabits is vividly, beautifully rendered. Scattered moons support scarce human populations - there are deserts, there are lush farming centres, there are dead wastelands. And between them all are interstellar rivers, on which you can sail to get from one world to another. How the system works, why it's there? Those are things you may be able to find out. But in the meantime, rest assured that it's beautiful, and a lot of fun to poke into the farthest corners of.

    It's also a world absolutely stepped in history - layers and layers of it, as your inscription hunting will slowly uncover. There's been some dark parts of the past, and some poignant moments as well. You'll find them intertwined with lost technologies that no-one alive understands or can maintain, stories and secrets encircling the worlds and their rivers. There's so many stories out here, and the game evokes the sense of discovery and the wonder and fascination of it perfectly.

    Also, the soundtrack. It's quietly compelling, and blends wonderfully with the environment. I'm not a big soundtrack person, but this one was pitch perfect.

    There's a lot of reading here, not going to lie. A lot of it is in smart dialogue between Aliyah and companions, where your choice of options determines which dialogue tree you go down; I don't know if there's a way to hear all the dialogue in one playthrough, but I suspect not. What I did get to read was clever, interesting, and organically written.

    Pacing-wise, this is self-driven; you can storm through the basic plot quite quickly, I suspect. But if you slow down, explore ruins, dig through ancient texts, poke around in corners - then you'll have a deeper, more emotionally and narratively fulfilliing experience.

    Anyway. I'm about to start New Game Plus. But wanted to say that this is an amazing, rewarding, cleverly written adventure, and I advise everyone to give it a try.

    (thanks @akajaybay for giving it to me in the first place!)

    destroyah87Commander ZoomEd GrubermanStormwatcherCantidoKarozSteel AngelElvenshaeDrake ChambersBig ClassyBetsuniMugsley
  • MadicanMadican No face Registered User regular
    Someone jumped the gun a bit and sent a string of code across.

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    Thank you @Karoz for CrossCode!

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    PSN: AuthorFrost
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    Ed GrubermanBedlamCroakerBCKalnaurDonnictoncB557StormwatcherMNC DoverJazzdestroyah87KarozPixelated PixieKai_SanTetraRayElvenshaeBetsuniIanatorMugsleyan_altGear GirlKoopahTroopahTalus9952
  • AistanAistan Registered User regular
    Best Game of 2018 Crosscode

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    Mugsley
  • BedlamBedlam Registered User regular
    Just did a map with zero stamps in Train Valley and got it to 3 stamps.

    So you could say

    8-)

    Ive been training.

    ElvenshaeBetsuniStormwatcherMugsley
  • DirtyboyDirtyboy Registered User regular
    Tracking puns in this thread is painful.

    BedlamElvenshaeBetsuniMugsley
  • JazzJazz UKRegistered User regular
    Dirtyboy wrote: »
    Tracking puns in this thread is painful.

    They never seem to run out of steam.

    BedlamElvenshaeBetsuniMugsleyTalus9952
  • Raiden333Raiden333 Registered User regular
    unknown.png?width=1763&height=910

    Farming, check. Bridgebuilding, check. Thatched roof cottages replacing fur huts, check.

    Yeah this game has got its hooks in.

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    Elvenshaedestroyah87IanatorMugsleyPoketpixieTalus9952
  • Raiden333Raiden333 Registered User regular
    And @Karoz gave me a code for VA-11 Hall-A! Been wanting to try this one out for awhile, thanks dude, may birthday power. :bro:

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    BedlamPixelated PixieDonnictonTetraRayJazzElvenshaecB557Ed GrubermanKarozBetsunidestroyah87KalnaurIanatorMugsleyan_altJaysonFourKoopahTroopahTalus9952
  • SmokeStacksSmokeStacks The Myth, the Legend, the Bowman, the Shambler FuckerRegistered User regular
    I gotta say, the Steam Thread is an excellent platform for train puns.

    73CQcJZ.png
    BedlamElvenshaeBetsuniMugsleyJaysonFour
  • XeddicusXeddicus Registered User regular
    edited May 12
    Edit: Ah, damnit, nevermind, beated.

    Xeddicus on
    "For no one - no one in this world can you trust. Not men. Not women. Not beasts...this you can trust."
  • JazzJazz UKRegistered User regular
    I gotta say, the Steam Thread is an excellent platform for train puns.

    We gauge it just right.

    ElvenshaeBetsuniMugsley
  • SpoitSpoit *twitch twitch* Registered User regular
    Jazz wrote: »
    I gotta say, the Steam Thread is an excellent platform for train puns.

    We gauge it just right.

    I dunno, some of them feel a bit railroaded

    steam_sig.png
    ElvenshaeBetsuniMugsleyTalus9952
  • JazzJazz UKRegistered User regular
    Spoit wrote: »
    Jazz wrote: »
    I gotta say, the Steam Thread is an excellent platform for train puns.

    We gauge it just right.

    I dunno, some of them feel a bit railroaded

    Sometimes it boils over.

    ElvenshaeBetsuniMugsleyTalus9952
  • Steel AngelSteel Angel Registered User regular
    @Sir Carcass would not approve of how we're conducting ourselves.

    Big Dookie wrote: »
    I found that tilting it doesn't work very well, and once I started jerking it, I got much better results.

    Steam Profile
    3DS: 3454-0268-5595 Battle.net: SteelAngel#1772
    ElvenshaeRoyceSraphimBetsuniCorsiniKalnaurSir CarcassMugsleyan_altHeartfinderTalus9952
  • FiggyFiggy Registered User regular
    choo choo

    XBL : Figment3 · SteamID : Figment · Website : www.nathanswyers.com
    TheStigElvenshaeMugsleyTalus9952
  • Santa ClaustrophobiaSanta Claustrophobia Ho Ho Ho Disconnecting from Xbox LIVERegistered User regular
    Spoit wrote: »
    Jazz wrote: »
    I gotta say, the Steam Thread is an excellent platform for train puns.

    We gauge it just right.

    I dunno, some of them feel a bit railroaded

    You're plumb loco.

    ElvenshaeMugsleyTalus9952
This discussion has been closed.