Brovid Hasselsmof[Growling historic on the fury road]Registered Userregular
I feel like I would prefer gender neutral pronouns, but I also absolutely can't be arsed with trying to navigate the world like that, at least not now, so I don't. I wish they were just more of a thing.
I feel like I would prefer gender neutral pronouns, but I also absolutely can't be arsed with trying to navigate the world like that, at least not now, so I don't. I wish they were just more of a thing.
Where I’m at with this right now is as follows: I don’t feel male, not exactly. I very much want to be treated as male by people and perceived as mostly male. In order to make this happen, I need to use male pronouns in all settings but the most intimate (as in, close friends and partners). For people who know me very well in person and won’t ever be like ‘haha, this is hard to keep track of,’ I would rather they use they pronouns for me, because that is more aligned to my identity and I know they see me as a person.
For all other circumstances, I don’t think it’s possible to be treated the way I want to unless I use male pronouns. If I used they pronouns, they would be considered optional and they would be considered to default to female, whereas I want they pronouns layered on top of a male identity. But yeah, I can’t imagine going to present to the client and being like oh I use they pronouns and then explaining they pronouns to the midwestern state govt officials. Not gonna happen—or like, it could, but I am not interested in having that interaction. Nor am I interested in having friends or acquaintances who use she for me when they can’t be bothered to remember/implement they.
This is how I feel now and perhaps (almost certainly) it will be different in the future.
Oh also is anyone going to the Out and Equal conference next month? I’m giving a presentation with my trans colleagues about why having trans visibility+diversity and inclusion is good for the workplace, and the importance of personal narrative in that setting.
(....yeah yeah yeah I know I know, I also do not understand why I am doing the corporate gay thing; I guess cause get to hang out with the hot nb consultant from the other office er I mean because I believe our message that trans (v explicitly including nb, and I speak to that in our presentation) visibility is important. Plus yeah, going from not being able to say the word trans to being able to talk about it including my personal story in front of many people is good for me).
Capitalism is not going away overnight (or perhaps ever, in the truly bad future), so work to make it suck less, especially for marginalized people, is a good thing. Framing it in terms of how it benefits our corporate overlords is...yeah, not great. But it’s still a good thing.
And I guess spending time with hot coworkers is its own reward.
Whatever a person chooses as their idenity does not need validity placed on it by others.
It is valid the moment the person chooses it and the fact anyone thinks differently cuts right to the heart of why trans identity is so maligned.
All trans identity is valid.
Period.
To clarify, this was a hypothetical, is the only reason I was asking. Had a person declared this identity, I would absolutely not question it.
the tbh is that a friend is writing a story and wanted to include a character that identified as I described, but wasn't sure if that was "how that worked." I was fairly sure it was valid, but figured I'd ask to seek some reassurance.
said friend is lesbian but cis, and wanted to include lgbt characters that didn't feel like self-inserts
Brovid Hasselsmof[Growling historic on the fury road]Registered Userregular
edited September 2019
I used my voice app yesterday for the first time in 4 months, and for the first time it showed my voice in the male range. Barely perceptible progress, ho.
Between that and the LGBTQ Presidential forum Friday - and how many questions were about trans issues (with largely good answers from the candidates!) - it feels as though we're cresting another hill. Not, like, in an "everything is about to be fine and great" sort of way (I doubt I'll live to see that), but kind of like how public acceptance of same-sex relationships swung in a major way in a pretty short amount of time.
I'm eyeing that October trans rights Supreme Court (US) case with trepidation. I don't trust this court, but there's still a chance. And even failing that, a chance for the Equality Act in a year and a half. And there's the trans march for visibility this Saturday nationwide...
I dunno, I'm cautiously excited.
Triptycho: A card-and-dice tabletop indie RPG currently in development and playtesting
I’m going to go to the trans visibility march with my colleagues! The rally is at 9 am and that is too early for me on a weekend, but the march starts at 11 so I can head over then. Should be interesting and maybe I’ll learn more about the local trans community.
Steam, LoL: credeiki
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mysticjuicer[he/him] I'm a muscle wizardand I cast P U N C HRegistered Userregular
I went to a festival called Bi+ Bonanza on Sunday, where I got to see a panel of all POC NBs talk about smashing the binary, a Samoan Fa'afafine do a dance performance, and also see a performance artist lie on a bed of nails with a cinder block on their stomach and while another performer broke the cinder block with a mallet.
It was pretty good!
Also I realised after I had dressed that my outfit (including one of my bifurious necklaces, naturally) was bi flag themed, with blue pants, purple cardigan, and bright pink lip colour.
Apparently I’m so bi that I am now unconsciously theming my outfits to match!
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lonelyahavaCall me Ahava ~~She/Her~~Move to New ZealandRegistered Userregular
Happy Bi Visibility Day, Y'all.
I'm here for hugs and fistbumps all day if y'all need.
Sigh. I'm still deep in the closet to everyone other than very close friends. Visibility day kinda brings me down.
I popped in to make this exact post
sad deflated high five, bud
In an ideal world we could all be out, and safe and happy and supported at the same time.
Unfortunately we do not live in that world yet.
Not being out, for whatever reason, does not make you any less valid than those of us lucky and privileged enough to be able to be!
Got my first laser treatment today for upper body acne scarring! It wasn't really painful at all. Can't speak to results yet, as it's all red and inflamed, which looks worse. Microneedling is next month to take care of the texture side of things.
Everyone was so nice and accommodating, which is super important when you're incognito trans and have to take off your concealing sports bra. They didn't seem to have a lot of experience with trans patients, which, not too surprising for this area. But they handled it fine, made me comfortable.
They took some Before pictures. Maybe when it's done I can show the results!
Triptycho: A card-and-dice tabletop indie RPG currently in development and playtesting
I really super love it when someone claims there's these studies that show *insert bullshit claim about something that doesn't really happen* and when you're like, "Wow I'd really like to see that study" they just ignore it and refuse to even think about actually proving any of their claims like "oh okay you're actually just full of shit nevermind."
I really super love it when someone claims there's these studies that show *insert bullshit claim about something that doesn't really happen* and when you're like, "Wow I'd really like to see that study" they just ignore it and refuse to even think about actually proving any of their claims like "oh okay you're actually just full of shit nevermind."
Being trans in 2019 on Twitter.
Mostly just huntin' monsters.
XBL:Phenyhelm - 3DS:Phenyhelm
Hmm, so, it's been a good while since my referral went through to the endocrinologist and while I knew the wait time would be long-ish I sorta expected to have at least received some correspondence by now, especially since they said they'd be sending me a literal paper letter.
But then when I checked the text message they sent me I realised that the clinic who had accepted my referral is different to the one that my GP recommended I be referred to. Unsure what to make of this I called my GP's Practice, and the nurse I spoke to said that with the public healthcare system here they often don't give you requests and just fit you in where ever, but I'd have to call the medicare referrals office to find out where I was sent.
So I did that, and sure enough my referral was sent to the "Sexual Health Clinic" at one of the hospitals in the city. Hm, okay. I look up their website and all I can find in terms of info about this clinic is that they deal with STIs/SDIs, not a single mention of an endocrinologist there at all. The medicare peson confirmed that it was sent there and they accepted the referral and that my GP was very specific about the purpose of my referral so... I guess they must do something relevant there?
Either way I am kinda put out, because the clinic that my GP wanted me to go to has a really good rep for being great with HRT stuff in the state, but this is how it goes with the public system here and I really can't afford to go see an endo privately as my insurance doesn't cover it at all.
Gonna call this hospital clinic tomorrow and try and get a feel for what they're like on this stuff but... I am a little apprehensive honestly.
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GrogMy sword is only steelin a useful shape.Registered Userregular
It sounds like your GP is on your side so if this clinic turns out to be no good you'll have them on your side, at least.
Yeah I just have no idea what the best course of action will be if the clinic turns out to be difficult, and I am kinda confused why I am being sent to a clinic that, as far as I can tell, doesn't have endocrinology involved in it at all. The hospital does have a dedicated endo clinic, but they're in a completely different part of the hospital campus entirely.
If this turns out poorly I don't know that my GP can just put through another referral asking for a different clinic, and I have to go through that system if I want all my consultations fully covered.
I'll call them tomorrow and try and find out what the deal is though, I should just try and not stress about it until then.
I really super love it when someone claims there's these studies that show *insert bullshit claim about something that doesn't really happen* and when you're like, "Wow I'd really like to see that study" they just ignore it and refuse to even think about actually proving any of their claims like "oh okay you're actually just full of shit nevermind."
Being trans in 2019 on Twitter.
Yeah it was a coworker claiming that doctor's shouldn't prescribe hormones for 5/6 year old kids because who knows how that might affect them.
I wanted to ignore all the bullshit and just say, "Yeah they might end up happy with who they are we can't have that."
My understanding was that hormones aren't necessary or even particularly helpful until, like, mid-teen years, and you only need puberty blockers before then. Is that outdated?
Fleur de Alys on
Triptycho: A card-and-dice tabletop indie RPG currently in development and playtesting
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Brovid Hasselsmof[Growling historic on the fury road]Registered Userregular
edited September 2019
Nah that's right. Nobody's giving hormones to (trans) 6 year olds.
Posts
Thank you! I didn't notice that for a couple reasons but thank you for pointing that out.
Ooh yes thank you much better word.
It is valid the moment the person chooses it and the fact anyone thinks differently cuts right to the heart of why trans identity is so maligned.
All trans identity is valid.
Period.
XBL:Phenyhelm - 3DS:Phenyhelm
Where I’m at with this right now is as follows: I don’t feel male, not exactly. I very much want to be treated as male by people and perceived as mostly male. In order to make this happen, I need to use male pronouns in all settings but the most intimate (as in, close friends and partners). For people who know me very well in person and won’t ever be like ‘haha, this is hard to keep track of,’ I would rather they use they pronouns for me, because that is more aligned to my identity and I know they see me as a person.
For all other circumstances, I don’t think it’s possible to be treated the way I want to unless I use male pronouns. If I used they pronouns, they would be considered optional and they would be considered to default to female, whereas I want they pronouns layered on top of a male identity. But yeah, I can’t imagine going to present to the client and being like oh I use they pronouns and then explaining they pronouns to the midwestern state govt officials. Not gonna happen—or like, it could, but I am not interested in having that interaction. Nor am I interested in having friends or acquaintances who use she for me when they can’t be bothered to remember/implement they.
This is how I feel now and perhaps (almost certainly) it will be different in the future.
(....yeah yeah yeah I know I know, I also do not understand why I am doing the corporate gay thing; I guess cause get to hang out with the hot nb consultant from the other office er I mean because I believe our message that trans (v explicitly including nb, and I speak to that in our presentation) visibility is important. Plus yeah, going from not being able to say the word trans to being able to talk about it including my personal story in front of many people is good for me).
And I guess spending time with hot coworkers is its own reward.
To clarify, this was a hypothetical, is the only reason I was asking. Had a person declared this identity, I would absolutely not question it.
the tbh is that a friend is writing a story and wanted to include a character that identified as I described, but wasn't sure if that was "how that worked." I was fairly sure it was valid, but figured I'd ask to seek some reassurance.
Well that and being trans. It's complicated.
This sucks.
She was ok with things until she wasn't.
XBL:Phenyhelm - 3DS:Phenyhelm
You will come through this stronger.
And I am changing a lot.
XBL:Phenyhelm - 3DS:Phenyhelm
XBL:Phenyhelm - 3DS:Phenyhelm
'Huh, sure is a kinda permanent slight discomfort there.'
'Oh.. oh!'
Apparently 'they/them' can only be plural, not singular. If you're a massive bigot/stupid fucking silly goose. :rotate:
Steam
I'm eyeing that October trans rights Supreme Court (US) case with trepidation. I don't trust this court, but there's still a chance. And even failing that, a chance for the Equality Act in a year and a half. And there's the trans march for visibility this Saturday nationwide...
I dunno, I'm cautiously excited.
It was pretty good!
Also I realised after I had dressed that my outfit (including one of my bifurious necklaces, naturally) was bi flag themed, with blue pants, purple cardigan, and bright pink lip colour.
Apparently I’m so bi that I am now unconsciously theming my outfits to match!
I'm here for hugs and fistbumps all day if y'all need.
Democrats Abroad! || Vote From Abroad
WITNESS MEEEEEEEEEEEE
I don't know if this helps at all but
We're here. We see you.
Democrats Abroad! || Vote From Abroad
I popped in to make this exact post
sad deflated high five, bud
Steam ID - VeldrinD | SS Post | Wishlist
Unfortunately we do not live in that world yet.
Not being out, for whatever reason, does not make you any less valid than those of us lucky and privileged enough to be able to be!
i guess i'm bi
I'm feeling a bit less down today, thanks. I think I'm going to think about expanding the circle another person or two maybe. Baby steps.
Everyone was so nice and accommodating, which is super important when you're incognito trans and have to take off your concealing sports bra. They didn't seem to have a lot of experience with trans patients, which, not too surprising for this area. But they handled it fine, made me comfortable.
They took some Before pictures. Maybe when it's done I can show the results!
Being trans in 2019 on Twitter.
XBL:Phenyhelm - 3DS:Phenyhelm
But then when I checked the text message they sent me I realised that the clinic who had accepted my referral is different to the one that my GP recommended I be referred to. Unsure what to make of this I called my GP's Practice, and the nurse I spoke to said that with the public healthcare system here they often don't give you requests and just fit you in where ever, but I'd have to call the medicare referrals office to find out where I was sent.
So I did that, and sure enough my referral was sent to the "Sexual Health Clinic" at one of the hospitals in the city. Hm, okay. I look up their website and all I can find in terms of info about this clinic is that they deal with STIs/SDIs, not a single mention of an endocrinologist there at all. The medicare peson confirmed that it was sent there and they accepted the referral and that my GP was very specific about the purpose of my referral so... I guess they must do something relevant there?
Either way I am kinda put out, because the clinic that my GP wanted me to go to has a really good rep for being great with HRT stuff in the state, but this is how it goes with the public system here and I really can't afford to go see an endo privately as my insurance doesn't cover it at all.
Gonna call this hospital clinic tomorrow and try and get a feel for what they're like on this stuff but... I am a little apprehensive honestly.
If this turns out poorly I don't know that my GP can just put through another referral asking for a different clinic, and I have to go through that system if I want all my consultations fully covered.
I'll call them tomorrow and try and find out what the deal is though, I should just try and not stress about it until then.
Yeah it was a coworker claiming that doctor's shouldn't prescribe hormones for 5/6 year old kids because who knows how that might affect them.
I wanted to ignore all the bullshit and just say, "Yeah they might end up happy with who they are we can't have that."