i dont think weve ever prepared for this or needed to because not many kids do it here and there arent a whole lot of kids in the area anyway
so we completely forget about it and then some kid knocks and the door and i am like 'uhh shit let me see what we got. okay here is a handful of chips'
Stuff that is undetectable and makes you shit yourself to death.
I would like this recipe.
Many acetylecholinesterase inhibitors are either invisible to detection methods or at least so difficult to find that most sloppy, fast paced labs won't catch them. They're found in many naturally occurring poisons and venoms, and humans have synthesized others for pesticides and shit like that. Many of the more deadly and popular nerve gas agents (chem weapons) use them to deal out death. A good deal of them actually are manufactured with chemical "tags" to help identify them because of how difficult it can be to test for them, so that if there is a release we will hopefully know what it is and where it came from. Yay science.
What makes them cool is called the SLUD reaction. SLUD stands for salivation, lacrimation, urination, and defecation. You basically drool, cry, piss, and shit yourself to death. A very common and effective form of chemical weapon that is horribly efficient yet funny.
'we got no food but maybe i can give you some tomato sauce in a cup or something'
See, this is topical, actually.
Last night in prime trick-or-treat time, i was out in the (connected) garage putting some stuff back in the fridge, and as I opened the door, a nearly full jar of salsa fell and broke on the ground.
I was already in a really bad mood thanks to my dear wife, and I yelled 'FUCK' quite loudly.
Apparently that was exactly some 5yr old girl was getting candy at the front door.
When I was out last night some guys had pretty good costumes, noface or whatever from spirited away and the clown from IT, two guys as the twin towers and one guy with half a strongbow can stuck to his forehead in an idle hands kinda thing. Also 'the gay fairy'. He gave me a lot of hair advice.
why not just give kids a bunch of crack and let the media blame the parents and school system and videogames and shit for turning even younger kids into drug addicts
with the way things are going why would anyone think that an 8year old ODing would be due to anything other than their own poor life choices
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HunterChemist with a heart of AuRegistered Userregular
edited November 2007
Anti-freeze (specifically the ethylene glycol in it) metabolizes into Oxalic acid, and then that reacts with calcium in your body to form Calcium oxalate crystals in your kidneys. It's fun, but way to easy to track and diagnose. Also, the treatment is to give the person alcohol so the body metabolizes that first and you simply piss the poison away unharmed.
'we got no food but maybe i can give you some tomato sauce in a cup or something'
See, this is topical, actually.
Last night in prime trick-or-treat time, i was out in the (connected) garage putting some stuff back in the fridge, and as I opened the door, a nearly full jar of salsa fell and broke on the ground.
I was already in a really bad mood thanks to my dear wife, and I yelled 'FUCK' quite loudly.
Apparently that was exactly some 5yr old girl was getting candy at the front door.
Oops.
Yeah, I was carving our pumpkin when my two year old came running amok thru our kitchen. This ruined my zen-like concentration, turning the spiral horn on the side of our jack-o-lantern into a big fucking hole. I yelled out "Cocksucker" without thinking, throwing down the exacto-knife. Ash stopped, turned to me, and said, "Sucker, daddy?" while pointing to the candybowl. So he didn't learn to swear from me yet.
Wedge Biggs on
I ain't never crossed a man who didn't deserve it. - Artis Ivey Jr.
'we got no food but maybe i can give you some tomato sauce in a cup or something'
See, this is topical, actually.
Last night in prime trick-or-treat time, i was out in the (connected) garage putting some stuff back in the fridge, and as I opened the door, a nearly full jar of salsa fell and broke on the ground.
I was already in a really bad mood thanks to my dear wife, and I yelled 'FUCK' quite loudly.
Apparently that was exactly some 5yr old girl was getting candy at the front door.
Oops.
Yeah, I was carving our pumpkin when my two year old came running amok thru our kitchen. This ruined my zen-like concentration, turning the spiral horn on the side of our jack-o-lantern into a big fucking hole. I yelled out "Cocksucker" without thinking, throwing down the exacto-knife. Ash stopped, turned to me, and said, "Sucker, daddy?" while pointing to the candybowl. So he didn't learn to swear from me yet.
he'll just have some subconscious mental connection between the phrase 'cocksucker' and candy
'we got no food but maybe i can give you some tomato sauce in a cup or something'
See, this is topical, actually.
Last night in prime trick-or-treat time, i was out in the (connected) garage putting some stuff back in the fridge, and as I opened the door, a nearly full jar of salsa fell and broke on the ground.
I was already in a really bad mood thanks to my dear wife, and I yelled 'FUCK' quite loudly.
Apparently that was exactly some 5yr old girl was getting candy at the front door.
Oops.
Yeah, I was carving our pumpkin when my two year old came running amok thru our kitchen. This ruined my zen-like concentration, turning the spiral horn on the side of our jack-o-lantern into a big fucking hole. I yelled out "Cocksucker" without thinking, throwing down the exacto-knife. Ash stopped, turned to me, and said, "Sucker, daddy?" while pointing to the candybowl. So he didn't learn to swear from me yet.
he'll just have some subconscious mental connection between the phrase 'cocksucker' and candy
where was it you lived again wedge?
because it looks like I'll be visiting there in the next 3 to 5 years.
witha bag of candy and some loose shorts.
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HunterChemist with a heart of AuRegistered Userregular
edited November 2007
I accidentally taught my son to call everybody, including my wife, stupid. I try not to swear because he repeats everything I say and gets me in trouble with it. So I just call people stupid.
The other day my wife did something he didn't like and he looks right at her and says "Mommy, stop being stupid". Of course I laugh like the asshole I am, and she's so pissed at me I'm not getting any for weeks.
'we got no food but maybe i can give you some tomato sauce in a cup or something'
See, this is topical, actually.
Last night in prime trick-or-treat time, i was out in the (connected) garage putting some stuff back in the fridge, and as I opened the door, a nearly full jar of salsa fell and broke on the ground.
I was already in a really bad mood thanks to my dear wife, and I yelled 'FUCK' quite loudly.
Apparently that was exactly some 5yr old girl was getting candy at the front door.
Oops.
Yeah, I was carving our pumpkin when my two year old came running amok thru our kitchen. This ruined my zen-like concentration, turning the spiral horn on the side of our jack-o-lantern into a big fucking hole. I yelled out "Cocksucker" without thinking, throwing down the exacto-knife. Ash stopped, turned to me, and said, "Sucker, daddy?" while pointing to the candybowl. So he didn't learn to swear from me yet.
he'll just have some subconscious mental connection between the phrase 'cocksucker' and candy
That might be helpful when someone offers him free candy.
I'm sorry but the best is when some really cute little 4 year-old comes to your door dressed as a bumble-bee or tigger and is way scared and his mom is trying to get him to go up and get some candy.
Then my dog who is dressed as darth vader comes barreling from the back of the house and starts licking him and he starts crying.
It was the cutest thing ever, but the kid is probably scared for life.
'we got no food but maybe i can give you some tomato sauce in a cup or something'
See, this is topical, actually.
Last night in prime trick-or-treat time, i was out in the (connected) garage putting some stuff back in the fridge, and as I opened the door, a nearly full jar of salsa fell and broke on the ground.
I was already in a really bad mood thanks to my dear wife, and I yelled 'FUCK' quite loudly.
Apparently that was exactly some 5yr old girl was getting candy at the front door.
Oops.
Yeah, I was carving our pumpkin when my two year old came running amok thru our kitchen. This ruined my zen-like concentration, turning the spiral horn on the side of our jack-o-lantern into a big fucking hole. I yelled out "Cocksucker" without thinking, throwing down the exacto-knife. Ash stopped, turned to me, and said, "Sucker, daddy?" while pointing to the candybowl. So he didn't learn to swear from me yet.
he'll just have some subconscious mental connection between the phrase 'cocksucker' and candy
That might be helpful when someone offers him free candy.
'we got no food but maybe i can give you some tomato sauce in a cup or something'
See, this is topical, actually.
Last night in prime trick-or-treat time, i was out in the (connected) garage putting some stuff back in the fridge, and as I opened the door, a nearly full jar of salsa fell and broke on the ground.
I was already in a really bad mood thanks to my dear wife, and I yelled 'FUCK' quite loudly.
Apparently that was exactly some 5yr old girl was getting candy at the front door.
Oops.
Yeah, I was carving our pumpkin when my two year old came running amok thru our kitchen. This ruined my zen-like concentration, turning the spiral horn on the side of our jack-o-lantern into a big fucking hole. I yelled out "Cocksucker" without thinking, throwing down the exacto-knife. Ash stopped, turned to me, and said, "Sucker, daddy?" while pointing to the candybowl. So he didn't learn to swear from me yet.
he'll just have some subconscious mental connection between the phrase 'cocksucker' and candy
That might be helpful when someone offers him free candy.
I already covered this you shitheel
Man, I'm sorry. No need to swear at me.
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HunterChemist with a heart of AuRegistered Userregular
'we got no food but maybe i can give you some tomato sauce in a cup or something'
See, this is topical, actually.
Last night in prime trick-or-treat time, i was out in the (connected) garage putting some stuff back in the fridge, and as I opened the door, a nearly full jar of salsa fell and broke on the ground.
I was already in a really bad mood thanks to my dear wife, and I yelled 'FUCK' quite loudly.
Apparently that was exactly some 5yr old girl was getting candy at the front door.
Oops.
Yeah, I was carving our pumpkin when my two year old came running amok thru our kitchen. This ruined my zen-like concentration, turning the spiral horn on the side of our jack-o-lantern into a big fucking hole. I yelled out "Cocksucker" without thinking, throwing down the exacto-knife. Ash stopped, turned to me, and said, "Sucker, daddy?" while pointing to the candybowl. So he didn't learn to swear from me yet.
he'll just have some subconscious mental connection between the phrase 'cocksucker' and candy
That might be helpful when someone offers him free candy.
Posts
Secret Satan 2013 Wishlist
My degree lets me put more clever poisons in the candy. Stuff that is undetectable and makes you shit yourself to death or get liver cancer.
Secret Satan 2013 Wishlist
Make sure it;s the bat-tank from begins.
Drive through the fucking door.
You should give him batarangs to chuck at other kids, then steal their candy as they cry. Children are a superstitious and cowardly lot
so we completely forget about it and then some kid knocks and the door and i am like 'uhh shit let me see what we got. okay here is a handful of chips'
Many acetylecholinesterase inhibitors are either invisible to detection methods or at least so difficult to find that most sloppy, fast paced labs won't catch them. They're found in many naturally occurring poisons and venoms, and humans have synthesized others for pesticides and shit like that. Many of the more deadly and popular nerve gas agents (chem weapons) use them to deal out death. A good deal of them actually are manufactured with chemical "tags" to help identify them because of how difficult it can be to test for them, so that if there is a release we will hopefully know what it is and where it came from. Yay science.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Acetylcholinesterase_inhibitor
What makes them cool is called the SLUD reaction. SLUD stands for salivation, lacrimation, urination, and defecation. You basically drool, cry, piss, and shit yourself to death. A very common and effective form of chemical weapon that is horribly efficient yet funny.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/SLUD
Secret Satan 2013 Wishlist
See, this is topical, actually.
Last night in prime trick-or-treat time, i was out in the (connected) garage putting some stuff back in the fridge, and as I opened the door, a nearly full jar of salsa fell and broke on the ground.
I was already in a really bad mood thanks to my dear wife, and I yelled 'FUCK' quite loudly.
Apparently that was exactly some 5yr old girl was getting candy at the front door.
Oops.
SE++ Map Steam
with the way things are going why would anyone think that an 8year old ODing would be due to anything other than their own poor life choices
Secret Satan 2013 Wishlist
Yeah, I was carving our pumpkin when my two year old came running amok thru our kitchen. This ruined my zen-like concentration, turning the spiral horn on the side of our jack-o-lantern into a big fucking hole. I yelled out "Cocksucker" without thinking, throwing down the exacto-knife. Ash stopped, turned to me, and said, "Sucker, daddy?" while pointing to the candybowl. So he didn't learn to swear from me yet.
he'll just have some subconscious mental connection between the phrase 'cocksucker' and candy
where was it you lived again wedge?
because it looks like I'll be visiting there in the next 3 to 5 years.
witha bag of candy and some loose shorts.
The other day my wife did something he didn't like and he looks right at her and says "Mommy, stop being stupid". Of course I laugh like the asshole I am, and she's so pissed at me I'm not getting any for weeks.
Secret Satan 2013 Wishlist
That might be helpful when someone offers him free candy.
Then my dog who is dressed as darth vader comes barreling from the back of the house and starts licking him and he starts crying.
It was the cutest thing ever, but the kid is probably scared for life.
"Oh what a day, what a LOVELY DAY!"
et tu, brute
vocativ
I already covered this you shitheel
Do you even know how many results you get when you GIS Darth Vader dog.
Fixed that for ya. His pronunciation is severely lacking. I mock him for it.
My dogs have been jedi, stormtroopers, bees, zombies, and military dogs
Man, I'm sorry. No need to swear at me.
Dress them up like cats next year and really fuck with people's minds.
Secret Satan 2013 Wishlist
I'm sorry, faggot
Second page, top row. WOW.
I don't know where that came from.
dress them up like cows by taping a bunch of cats to them
Because he should.
He'll have to make sure the kid knows to respond when he calls him "detective."
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