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Warhammer 40k: witty stomp-joke goes here

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    Librarian's ghostLibrarian's ghost Librarian, Ghostbuster, and TimSpork Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    SJ wrote: »

    I use the lip of another paint pot top to hold the lid of the new pots down while I use them.

    Well the problem was I ended up opening it so violently that the fucking thing jumped out of my hand. Not happy.

    So it was less of a "damn cap stay open" moment, and more of a "HULK SMASH" moment?

    Jesus, I need to get off my lazy ass and take pictures of the Steel Legion I've finished.

    I chose to visualize this...


    With MS paint....
    spill.jpg

    I think it was more like this...
    Hulksmash.jpg

    Librarian's ghost on
    (Switch Friend Code) SW-4910-9735-6014(PSN) timspork (Steam) timspork (XBox) Timspork


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    SJSJ College. Forever.Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    SJ wrote: »

    I use the lip of another paint pot top to hold the lid of the new pots down while I use them.

    Well the problem was I ended up opening it so violently that the fucking thing jumped out of my hand. Not happy.

    So it was less of a "damn cap stay open" moment, and more of a "HULK SMASH" moment?

    Jesus, I need to get off my lazy ass and take pictures of the Steel Legion I've finished.

    I chose to visualize this...


    With MS paint....
    spill.jpg

    This is my new fucking background, damn you!

    edit: Awesome choice of MSPaint by the way. You aren't a goon, are you?

    SJ on
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    DissociaterDissociater Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    SJ wrote: »
    SJ wrote: »

    I use the lip of another paint pot top to hold the lid of the new pots down while I use them.

    Well the problem was I ended up opening it so violently that the fucking thing jumped out of my hand. Not happy.

    So it was less of a "damn cap stay open" moment, and more of a "HULK SMASH" moment?

    Jesus, I need to get off my lazy ass and take pictures of the Steel Legion I've finished.

    I chose to visualize this...


    With MS paint....
    spill.jpg

    This is my new fucking background, damn you!

    edit: Awesome choice of MSPaint by the way. You aren't a goon, are you?

    nah, I considered it. But I'm cheap.


    Oh so cheap.

    Dissociater on
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    SJSJ College. Forever.Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    It is oh so worth it.

    SJ on
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    leafleaf Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Hell yes I got a check in the mail for $100 from the government.

    What should I buy?


    Edit:
    08862dba052b201614b4f638da698e234f84bd68.gif

    leaf on
    newsig-notweed.jpg
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    RendRend Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    leaf wrote: »
    Hell yes I got a check in the mail for $100 from the government.

    What should I buy?

    Warhammer stuff?

    Rend on
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    Librarian's ghostLibrarian's ghost Librarian, Ghostbuster, and TimSpork Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Rend wrote: »
    leaf wrote: »
    Hell yes I got a check in the mail for $100 from the government.

    What should I buy?

    Warhammer 40k stuff for Timspork?

    Fix'd

    Librarian's ghost on
    (Switch Friend Code) SW-4910-9735-6014(PSN) timspork (Steam) timspork (XBox) Timspork


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    trentsteeltrentsteel Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    3clipse wrote: »
    Peekaboo, who loves you?
    I do!
    9a824dd7_dg2.jpg

    What is that monstrosity?

    Please tell me where to get that.

    i would start a Nurgle army just to have that.

    trentsteel on
    http://www.botsnthings.com/
    I made a TD for iphone and windows phone!

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    JJ Rabbit GangmemberRegistered User regular
    edited June 2008
    I posted the link on the previous page...

    J on
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    HompHomp Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Helldorado site

    It's a french mini site, so some of it might not be safe for work or something.

    Homp on
    chosen7171-1.gif
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    KublaKhanKublaKhan Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Well, I'm doing some quick mockups to test colour schemes with my new sisters, here's the first try, I want something that's a bit grimy looking but still 'pops' on the tabletop. Any thoughts, I'm mixed on this scheme? (Keep in mind this was a quick mockup, but the basic colours would remain the same though):
    IMG_8863.jpg
    IMG_8861.jpg

    KublaKhan on
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    DraevenDraeven Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    what colors are you using for the armor ? kubla ? it looks good but it just doesn't "Pop" for me but its still nice.

    Draeven on
    Morskitter wrote "Spikes, choppas, tentacles, magic? Can't hold a candle to Sergeant Pimp here."

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    Ziac45Ziac45 Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    God that model is the most disgusting thing I have ever seen in my life..

    Edit:Also Gamesday model is up to 31.00 on ebay with 2 days left!

    Ziac45 on
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    KublaKhanKublaKhan Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Draeven wrote: »
    what colors are you using for the armor ? kubla ? it looks good but it just doesn't "Pop" for me but its still nice.

    Deneb Stone, one of the new foundation paints

    KublaKhan on
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    EinEin CaliforniaRegistered User regular
    edited June 2008
    So, seeing as I've just recently added a Tutorials section to The Warforge, I've been doing quite a bit of thinking. My first and only tutorial has been about pressure casting so far, and it's kind've silly to have one tutorial, so I've been wanting to do a couple more.

    That said, I'm not sure what would be a good subject for tutorialization. Do you guys have any particular thing you can think of that I might be able to do? I've considered stuff like pinning, but at this point I basically eyeball everything by now because I've done it so much. Whatever I end up doing, I want to continue the trend of doing youtube video tutorials, because I think you can learn a lot more from video than still images.

    Ein on
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    NiklasNiklas SwedenRegistered User regular
    edited June 2008
    So, seeing as I've just recently added a Tutorials section to The Warforge, I've been doing quite a bit of thinking. My first and only tutorial has been about pressure casting so far, and it's kind've silly to have one tutorial, so I've been wanting to do a couple more.

    That said, I'm not sure what would be a good subject for tutorialization. Do you guys have any particular thing you can think of that I might be able to do? I've considered stuff like pinning, but at this point I basically eyeball everything by now because I've done it so much. Whatever I end up doing, I want to continue the trend of doing youtube video tutorials, because I think you can learn a lot more from video than still images.

    One of the hardest challenges I face as an newbie is highlighting, and I would LOVE a video tutorial on that. I know it´s pretty basic, but it would really make a difference for us beginners who nowadays has to rely on GW´s silly introductions.

    Niklas on
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    UtsanomikoUtsanomiko Bros before Does Rollin' in the thlayRegistered User regular
    edited June 2008
    I agree, Warforge should cover some of the basics of assembly, sculpting tips, and painting.

    GW made their intro guides way too indirect and brief; a simple pause in the brisk descriptions to say "Hey, you know where would be good places to put highlights? Here, here, and here, on all the raised spots." But then again they don't believe in the internet and you're supposed to drive 200 miles to a GW store to get the car dealership experience.

    I've thought about making an assembly, priming, and painting tutorial myself, and putting it on YouTube. I'd like to give people consistent techniques that produce good results in reasonable time; nothing complicated or overly fancy. The two things keeping me back has been my camera is from 1997 and I haven't had good models laying around I could use as demonstrations. Maybe some Orks would work well, I've got their paint scheme down alright.

    I'd suggest Jam looks at Dysartes.com's modeling tutorials and guides for inspiration, because they cover a lot of good subjects with their photo guides.

    Utsanomiko on
    hmm.gif
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    EinEin CaliforniaRegistered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Noted. Though I don't think my painting advice is worth much, seeing as how I hardly ever do it. :P

    Unrelated note:

    Holy damn this would be awesome.

    Ein on
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    DayspringDayspring the Phoenician Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Oh bad ass.
    I was kinda wanting to see some animated flame template action going on there though.

    Dayspring on
    My Warhammer stuff online: Youtube Twitter Insta
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    rucdocrucdoc Crazy guy in the corner ClassifiedRegistered User regular
    edited June 2008
    I bow before their greatness, and must have a four by six table, markers for my tau army, and all data installed NOW.

    rucdoc on
    Original Creepy Janitor

    http://www.dust514stats.com
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    leafleaf Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Haha my god, something to keep so many fuckers from moving six inches and "just alittle bit more".

    leaf on
    newsig-notweed.jpg
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    UtsanomikoUtsanomiko Bros before Does Rollin' in the thlayRegistered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Well, next time I'm playing on a 12"x16" board with few enough models to resolve movement and rolling individually, I'll be wishing it was with that touchscreen program. :P

    Utsanomiko on
    hmm.gif
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    CrownAxeCrownAxe Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Here is a 1.5k list for Witch Hunters i hope you can check out for me

    HQ 116
    Canoness
    + Cloak of St Aspira
    + Book of ST Locius
    + Eviscerator
    + Jump Pack
    + Bolt Pistol

    TR 615
    Veteran Superior
    + Book of St Locius
    9 Battle Sisters
    + Flamer
    + Heavy Flamer
    Rhino
    + Extra Armour
    + Smoke Launchers

    Veteran Superior
    + Book of St Locius
    9 Battle Sisters
    + Flamer
    + Heavy Flamer
    Rhino
    + Extra Armour
    + Smoke Launchers

    Veteran Superior
    + Book of St Locius
    9 Battle Sisters
    + Flamer
    + Heavy Flamer
    Rhino
    + Extra Armour
    + Smoke Launchers

    FA 460
    Veteran Superior
    + Eviscerator
    + Book of St Locius
    7 Seraphim
    + Twin Hand Flammers
    + Twin Hand Flammers

    Veteran Superior
    + Eviscerator
    + Book of St Locius
    7 Seraphim
    + Twin Hand Flammers
    + Twin Hand Flammers

    HS 306
    Exorcist
    + Smoke Launcher
    + Extra Armour
    + Pintle-Mounted Storm Bolter

    Exorcist
    + Smoke Launcher
    + Extra Armour
    + Pintle-Mounted Storm Bolter

    1497

    CrownAxe on
    AwesomeSig.jpg
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    PolloDiabloPolloDiablo Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    So I recently had my first battle against the Tau, and rape isn't a strong enough word to describe what they did to my guardsmen. So I put it to you, CF, how on earth is the Imperial Guard supposed to beat the Tau?

    I realize that my best bet is hand-to-hand, but they blasted apart my army in only a turn or two. Conventional wisdom would dictate that I should keep terrain between us, but it seems like every unit in the army can either jump over terrain and then jump back in the assault phase, getting me shot without being able to shoot back. And they can fire under their skimmers, but they block LOS for me. Clearly my infantry don't stand a chance, and while a few Leman Russes can get the job done, they're vulnerable to the mountain of railguns those xenos get.

    So, any advice for Imperial Guard vs. the Tau?

    PolloDiablo on
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    Salvation122Salvation122 Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    CrownAxe wrote: »
    Here is a 1.5k list for Witch Hunters i hope you can check out for me
    Not at all a bad generalist list but Orks will eat you for breakfast if they maneuver properly. If you expand to 1850/2k your absolute first priority is getting some heavy bolters in there.

    Salvation122 on
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    Salvation122Salvation122 Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    So, any advice for Imperial Guard vs. the Tau?
    Against Tau specifically? Don't take as many lascannons as normal. Instead, take Autocannons and heavy bolters. Both will negate the armor save, and if your opponent is spending boatloads on railguns you can likely wipe out (or at least break) their troop units pretty easily. I wouldn't recommend trying to get into assault playing as IG, as even though you can smack them around their armor save will still give them reasonable durability and you waste turns of heavy weapons fire rushing up towards them. Don't focus-fire on the tanks - shake one, then tear apart their infantry.

    Salvation122 on
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    ElldrenElldren Is a woman dammit ceterum censeoRegistered User regular
    edited June 2008
    So, any advice for Imperial Guard vs. the Tau?
    Against Tau specifically? Don't take as many lascannons as normal. Instead, take Autocannons and heavy bolters. Both will negate the armor save, and if your opponent is spending boatloads on railguns you can likely wipe out (or at least break) their troop units pretty easily. I wouldn't recommend trying to get into assault playing as IG, as even though you can smack them around their armor save will still give them reasonable durability and you waste turns of heavy weapons fire rushing up towards them. Don't focus-fire on the tanks - shake one, then tear apart their infantry.

    Autocannons, yay!

    Elldren on
    fuck gendered marketing
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    PolloDiabloPolloDiablo Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Thanks for the advice.

    Also, not specifically against the Tau, but which is generally more effective, Heavy Bolters or Autocannons? I generally give my squads heavy bolters, just for the volume of fires, but should I switch them out for autocannons?

    PolloDiablo on
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    JohnnyCacheJohnnyCache Starting Defense Place at the tableRegistered User regular
    edited June 2008
    So I recently had my first battle against the Tau, and rape isn't a strong enough word to describe what they did to my guardsmen. So I put it to you, CF, how on earth is the Imperial Guard supposed to beat the Tau?

    I realize that my best bet is hand-to-hand, but they blasted apart my army in only a turn or two. Conventional wisdom would dictate that I should keep terrain between us, but it seems like every unit in the army can either jump over terrain and then jump back in the assault phase, getting me shot without being able to shoot back. And they can fire under their skimmers, but they block LOS for me. Clearly my infantry don't stand a chance, and while a few Leman Russes can get the job done, they're vulnerable to the mountain of railguns those xenos get.

    So, any advice for Imperial Guard vs. the Tau?

    I have a friend who insists the tau actually cannot beat the guard. Because of the beatings he's been given.

    You want tanks. Cheap'd up tanks. Russes with no extra crap, chimeras with two heavy bolters, that kind of thing. The autocannons are a good suggestion, and I would also say actually take a trio of mortars and maybe stick a few with your entrenching squads if you anticipate any kroot. Mortars fix yer kroot problims. Don't buy sentinels or ogryn, kitted up specialists are the worst thing to take vs the tau. You might think about some deepstriking troops to distract his broadsides, such as stormtroopers. Make a couple "battlesuit response squads" up that use a lot of plasma guns and pistols - a unit of veterans or an jr. officer's retinue works good for this. scatter them evenly in your lines to respond to battlesuited incursions. Try to keep most of your troops 36" away from his gunline during deployment- if all he's got to fire is his heavy support choices and some battlesuit missiles you'll weather a first turn and get to shoot back.

    Do not under-estimate kroot - they will eat your guardsmen. Literally.

    Their skimmers don't block LOS back to you unless they land for a turn BTW

    IRT Devil chicken

    depends what you're shooting is the obvious truism - the autocannon can hurt more things, but you're giving up that third shot. Autocannons are best for trashing walkers, greater demons, sort of medium-sized crap. Heavy bolters are really just better at killing troops.

    JohnnyCache on
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    Salvation122Salvation122 Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    depends what you're shooting is the obvious truism - the autocannon can hurt more things, but you're giving up that third shot. Autocannons are best for trashing walkers, greater demons, sort of medium-sized crap. Heavy bolters are really just better at killing troops.

    Basically, Heavy Bolters versus guard, horde nids, certain eldar builds, and orks, and autocannons for everyone else.

    Salvation122 on
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    ElldrenElldren Is a woman dammit ceterum censeoRegistered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Autocannon do have a range advantage as well, which is important to consider against Tau.

    Elldren on
    fuck gendered marketing
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    PolloDiabloPolloDiablo Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Thanks, everyone. Hopefully next time will go a little smoother.

    PolloDiablo on
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    rucdocrucdoc Crazy guy in the corner ClassifiedRegistered User regular
    edited June 2008
    carapace armor, as normally you don't get saves against tau fire. and yeah skimers don't block LOS but you have to roll for target priority to shoot the troops instead.

    rucdoc on
    Original Creepy Janitor

    http://www.dust514stats.com
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    ElldrenElldren Is a woman dammit ceterum censeoRegistered User regular
    edited June 2008
    rucdoc wrote: »
    carapace armor, as normally you don't get saves against tau fire. and yeah skimers don't block LOS but you have to roll for target priority to shoot the troops instead.


    Carapace is overpriced. For the same points as equipping a minimum-sized platoon with carapace armor, you could add a whole extra squad.

    Elldren on
    fuck gendered marketing
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    WulfWulf Disciple of Tzeentch The Void... (New Jersey)Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Elldren wrote: »
    rucdoc wrote: »
    carapace armor, as normally you don't get saves against tau fire. and yeah skimers don't block LOS but you have to roll for target priority to shoot the troops instead.


    Carapace is overpriced. For the same points as equipping a minimum-sized platoon with carapace armor, you could add a whole extra squad.

    Spoken like a true hero of the Imperium!

    Wulf on
    Everyone needs a little Chaos!
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    Salvation122Salvation122 Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Wulf wrote: »
    Elldren wrote: »
    rucdoc wrote: »
    carapace armor, as normally you don't get saves against tau fire. and yeah skimers don't block LOS but you have to roll for target priority to shoot the troops instead.


    Carapace is overpriced. For the same points as equipping a minimum-sized platoon with carapace armor, you could add a whole extra squad.

    Spoken like a true hero of the Imperium!

    The following maxim works for every army except Nids and Eldar: when in doubt, buy more bodies before more toys.

    Salvation122 on
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    JohnnyCacheJohnnyCache Starting Defense Place at the tableRegistered User regular
    edited June 2008
    rucdoc wrote: »
    carapace armor, as normally you don't get saves against tau fire. and yeah skimers don't block LOS but you have to roll for target priority to shoot the troops instead.

    Just field conscripts and storm troopers instead of buying everybody carapace

    also, troops are a small target, skimmertanks are large targets. You may fire at either the closest large target or the closest small target without a test. The value of the infamous tau drop is that the skimmer shields you from assault.

    JohnnyCache on
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    UtsanomikoUtsanomiko Bros before Does Rollin' in the thlayRegistered User regular
    edited June 2008
    CrownAxe wrote: »
    Here is a 1.5k list for Witch Hunters i hope you can check out for me

    Besides the HQ, You've got 5 units equipped with the Book of St Lucius. I'm sure you noticed that the item enables a nearby unit to use the bearer's Leadership for a save. For a mere 5 points it's a decent item.

    The problem lies with the fact, besides your HQ, every unit already has the same Leadership stat of 9. There's nobody in your Sororitas army with less Ld and so those books aren't boosting anyone. That's 25 points better spent on other wargear, at the very least.

    Utsanomiko on
    hmm.gif
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    KublaKhanKublaKhan Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Alternatively, take one of those assassin's that pops up anywhere she is amazing against Tau, especially with that move an enemy unit rule, actually using Guard she is amazing just for being able to move an enemy unit into the open on the first turn against anyone.

    KublaKhan on
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    Salvation122Salvation122 Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    KublaKhan wrote: »
    Alternatively, take one of those assassin's that pops up anywhere
    EVERYONE WILL HATE YOU.

    Fuck the Callidus. So retarded.

    Salvation122 on
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