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I'm gonna be a papa! On purpose!
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Honestly, how many times do you have to watch a woman fellate six horses before it becomes interesting again?
Pshhh, horses are old hat. It's all about turtle and lion porn nowadays.
A veritable Noah's Ark of beastiality.
and then they realize that babies sleep about 20 hours a day and you just sit around and watch it eat and sleep for about the first 3 months
then it starts to react back at you and has a little personality and just gets cooler from there
but that first month is boooooooooring
Bare Bear on Bear Action.
they never got on any weird sleep schedules and were (have been so far) healthy with no real sickness or anything like that
although we had a pretty bad scare with my youngest in his first month when we found blood in his crib, it turned out to be no biggie
but my heart goes out to all the parents of kids that have troubles when they are tiny tiny
Then it does that wicked meconium poop that's like black ink mixed with tar.
Secret Satan 2013 Wishlist
Also, video games are fun and all, but a game that I have trouble saying no to is Where in the World is Carmen Sandiego? Seriously, I'm 31 and I still love that game.
that's my boy! hes a goofball
all you have to do is say howdy to him and he will crack the fuck up
you sure know how to bust my balls, man.
"apparently my baby's ass is an oil reserve..."
I thought my kid passed the Venom symbiote.
Secret Satan 2013 Wishlist
The folks at the hospital always joked (and still do) that they were going to name a wing of the place after us.
Looking back I still have very little concept of what it must of have been like for my folks.
and when i set her down on the bed i realize, oh no, that wasn't butt sweat, that was gaucamole all on my arm and shirt now, and dribbling down her leg on the bed.
oops!
hey the steak and shrimp was worth it, now if only i could've ordered beer there
hanging out with her on my lap and all of the sudden im all wet. and i know i didnt piss myself
not this time at least
but i think we are over the hump and she is going completely by herself now. and it is awesome
That kid is awesome.
victory!
My sister, on the other hand, never shut up
its funny because she sits on the regular toilet with this smaller seat that fits her butt, and she has a little step stool that helps her get up there
well shes good about getting her pants down and getting up there and then wiping and everything, but she has trouble getting her pants back up
theres been a few times where she needs help getting her pants up and steps down off the stool and goes almost face first into the linoleum
they were so wrong
Rach is gonna come home and find you sitting at the computer looking like the guy from stephen king's "thinner"
all gaunt and worn out with 12 empty bottles of lotion and 10 boxes of spent tissues piled around the desk
"I....I....oh thank god you're home!"
I'll be there for youuuu
When the rain starts to pour.
Actually I have to go pick her up
So the question becomes, will I have the strength to make it to the car?
This is the image I'm going to have in my head when I first meet Mori and Janson and I'm going to be snickering the whole time.
"Give me a gatorade and some vitamin E. I need you!"
is it wrong to laugh about that and hear you sound exasperated because you gotta go pick her up from the floor while you're playing cod4?
no its totally cool because if she wasnt ruining my K/D ratio i would be laughing too
shes pretty tough about it. tell her she's ok and to shake it off. she shakes her whole body, arms and legs and head, and goes "me OK!" and runs off to do something else
i am totally glad i sent you those games to aid you in your parental neglect
That is so adorable that I believe I just got diabetes.
I thought he was talking to me.
i was laying on the cough, she climbed up on the back, put her elbow out, tapped it twice and dropped the Big Elbow on me. Macho Man Randy Savage style
i was so proud. i really couldnt have asked for a cooler kid
she was being a tard, kinda feel bad about it though. luckily, they were baby teeth
This kid is fantastic.