i always feel weird about buying condoms because i am a large man and so i have to buy large condoms
i feel like an asshole buying those boxes with the overblown text and taglines
like they're going "okay, sure, buddy" but tall people are differently shaped
i'm so much more comfortable going straight into some anarchist sex shop run by kinky lesbians and like, buying a vibrator or bondage equipment or something
Anarchist sex shop.
My mind is awash with possibilities.
Dildos modeled after Sacco and Vanzetti's dicks.
is there a sex shop which sells historically themed sex toys
like, regular sex toys
just with a country's branding on it
a pair of red, communist era dildos named, respectively, the hammer and the sickle, etc
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OnTheLastCastlelet's keep it haimish for the peripateticRegistered Userregular
I'm not embarrassed to buy condoms but I would probably run away if none of the plain varieties were available. The clerk at CVS can know that I'll be doing some fucking later, but I don't want her knowing my preferences! Ah, cherry flavored lubricant and ribbing, I see how you like it. That'll be $6.
Alright. Not going into the office tomorrow, and tomorrow is full-shower day.
Time to wank.
wait what?
A trap is for fish: when you've got the fish, you can forget the trap. A snare is for rabbits: when you've got the rabbit, you can forget the snare. Words are for meaning: when you've got the meaning, you can forget the words.
+3
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OnTheLastCastlelet's keep it haimish for the peripateticRegistered Userregular
uh oh this movie is on my streaming site and has 96% on rotten tomatoes as a really good horror movie
While you all are discussing fornication, I'm puzzling out why the product of my upstairs neighbors' genital hijinks thinks it's acceptable to stomp across the floor repeatedly at 8pm.
Also, nobody should be embarrassed to buy condoms. I mean, yeah, maybe you don't want a grandmotherly-looking old lady ringing up your magnums or whatevs, but... can you imagine how much d she's probably worked with in her life? Ain't a damn thing our young selves can do that's gonna surprise a septuagenarian.
I'm not embarrassed to buy condoms but I would probably run away if none of the plain varieties were available. The clerk at CVS can know that I'll be doing some fucking later, but I don't want her knowing my preferences! Ah, cherry flavored lubricant and ribbing, I see how you like it. That'll be $6.
i always feel weird about buying condoms because i am a large man and so i have to buy large condoms
i feel like an asshole buying those boxes with the overblown text and taglines
like they're going "okay, sure, buddy" but tall people are differently shaped
i'm so much more comfortable going straight into some anarchist sex shop run by kinky lesbians and like, buying a vibrator or bondage equipment or something
Anarchist sex shop.
My mind is awash with possibilities.
Dildos modeled after Sacco and Vanzetti's dicks.
is there a sex shop which sells historically themed sex toys
like, regular sex toys
just with a country's branding on it
a pair of red, communist era dildos named, respectively, the hammer and the sickle, etc
The Fleur-de-lis sounds terrifying
“I was quick when I came in here, I’m twice as quick now”
-Indiana Solo, runner of blades
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spacekungfumanPoor and minority-filledRegistered User, __BANNED USERSregular
Condoms are awful. It is debatable whether it is even worth it to put one on to have sex. Monogamy 4 life (literally).
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CindersWhose sails were black when it was windyRegistered Userregular
Alright. Not going into the office tomorrow, and tomorrow is full-shower day.
Time to wank.
i don't understand what any of these things have to do with any of the others
Well, the not-office part means I get to sleep in a bit and thus can dedicate more time to said wank, and the second part means that the timing is apt for a proper scrub of the cooch.
It's a very structured system, you see. Although I jack off every night anyway. Tmi?
Honestly, not chatting with people in the grocery store line or whatever here is sort of rude...but! (and it's an important but) if they don't respond or give any indication they don't want to converse you stfu, no harm no foul
yeah
I can't really think of any time I've wanted to have a conversation in the grocery store with someone waiting in line aside from like, coordinating where the little lane divider is or whatever
somehow this doesn't surprise me
I end up in amazing conversations with regularity, spool's usually floored at the stuff I learn...I'll come out of "running" into the store after 20 minutes and he'll be waiting in the car mildly irritated and I'll hug some stranger and maybe hold their hands for a moment then come tell him about how their son tried to set the cat on fire last week. I love my life
it helps that my entire job is talking to people, some of them very energy-draining, some of them really needing my full on attention on an emotional level because art, on a financial level because I'm a consultant trying to sell them art supplies, and on a technical level because the materials we sell need to be used correctly or it's a big-ol waste of money and time
so my small talk is usually just about dry by 6pm
nodnod, I got that impression from posts you've made before. I'm lucky in a lot of ways because most of my life involves only talking to people when I fucking feel like it, the rest of the time they get a raised eyebrow and wander off to bring me my coffee or whatever
motherhood ftw
oh yeah
I am starting to get people who are interested in me doing freelance work for them and so I'm more or less dreaming of the day this day job can be less than "most of my entire life" because the social anxiety is really just ugh
but then
freelancing also comes with a whole new variety of social anxiety ugh
basically don't be an artist, ever
i always feel weird about buying condoms because i am a large man and so i have to buy large condoms
i feel like an asshole buying those boxes with the overblown text and taglines
like they're going "okay, sure, buddy" but tall people are differently shaped
i'm so much more comfortable going straight into some anarchist sex shop run by kinky lesbians and like, buying a vibrator or bondage equipment or something
i always feel weird about buying condoms because i am a large man and so i have to buy large condoms
i feel like an asshole buying those boxes with the overblown text and taglines
like they're going "okay, sure, buddy" but tall people are differently shaped
i'm so much more comfortable going straight into some anarchist sex shop run by kinky lesbians and like, buying a vibrator or bondage equipment or something
HUMBLE FUCKING BRAG, dude.
I mean, even if true, humblebrag.
should i just be explicit?
i have a big fat cock
it's great, gotten good reviews, absolutely ruined my first sexual experience ever when it got choked out by a regular size condom
also wearing linen pants is very dangerous
slightly bent to the left though, which seems far more common than dicks bent to the right, what's the deal with that?
Most people are right-handed. Right-handed jerking causes a left-ward bend. I have no evidence for either this phenomenon or my answer to it.
Mystery solved, Aristotelian style.
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OnTheLastCastlelet's keep it haimish for the peripateticRegistered Userregular
Alright. Not going into the office tomorrow, and tomorrow is full-shower day.
Time to wank.
i don't understand what any of these things have to do with any of the others
Well, the not-office part means I get to sleep in a bit and thus can dedicate more time to said wank, and the second part means that the timing is apt for a proper scrub of the cooch.
It's a very structured system, you see. Although I jack off every night anyway. Tmi?
Posts
is there a sex shop which sells historically themed sex toys
like, regular sex toys
just with a country's branding on it
a pair of red, communist era dildos named, respectively, the hammer and the sickle, etc
i don't understand what any of these things have to do with any of the others
when i was younger i often didn't trouble with condoms which is extremely terrible, in retrospect
while not really defensible, i totally 'get' it tho
one time I had to ask where the lube was!
i was loud and proud about it
WHERES THE LUBE
wait what?
http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/the_babadook/
O
M
G
Also, nobody should be embarrassed to buy condoms. I mean, yeah, maybe you don't want a grandmotherly-looking old lady ringing up your magnums or whatevs, but... can you imagine how much d she's probably worked with in her life? Ain't a damn thing our young selves can do that's gonna surprise a septuagenarian.
meet people at social gatherings
literally impossible
What kind of lube?
It takes forever to dry out long hair.
The Fleur-de-lis sounds terrifying
-Indiana Solo, runner of blades
Water based?
Silicon?
Well, the not-office part means I get to sleep in a bit and thus can dedicate more time to said wank, and the second part means that the timing is apt for a proper scrub of the cooch.
It's a very structured system, you see.
Although I jack off every night anyway. Tmi?
oh yeah
I am starting to get people who are interested in me doing freelance work for them and so I'm more or less dreaming of the day this day job can be less than "most of my entire life" because the social anxiety is really just ugh
but then
freelancing also comes with a whole new variety of social anxiety ugh
basically don't be an artist, ever
Uncanny Magazine!
The Mad Writers Union
I have many questions.
I believe the first is: what is "full-shower day"?
COMING OUT AFTER THANKSGIVING
SO EXCITE
I misread that as the badonkadonk
way better movie probably
twitch.tv/tehsloth
This did not get the recognition it deserved
recocknition
Most people are right-handed. Right-handed jerking causes a left-ward bend. I have no evidence for either this phenomenon or my answer to it.
Mystery solved, Aristotelian style.
did you just finish cybering with other raven... but wait... it's 4am there...
ARE YOU ON VIAGRA
i think we've discussed this before but i've also made a lot of very questionable decisions especially after some bad things happened to me
but i'm the luckiest dude alive so healthy as an ox
Let the schwa and nasal diphthongs wash over you.
This always comes as revolutionary news when I bring it up in chat, but, you're not supposed to wash your hair everyday. It is BAD for your SCALP.
So I don't.
I don't.
uhm so i guess i don't have a way to watch it now
<.<
And has been in the hands of school children all across the country.
I don't think that's the right word.
This is a solid observation. I have been deprived of the other raven dong for too many a month.
But next month, babeh... next month is gonna be a good month.
oh god
i'm not watching and writing to congress to ban it
fuck u aussies
right but my question is how you wash your body otherwise
i get you don't want to scrub the oils out of your hair or w-e
do you mean when you don't take a 'full shower' you like, but your hair in a bag? or you take a bath
or you spit in the crooks of your elbow and rub really hard?