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The Even Worse Joke Thread

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    Goose!Goose! That's me, honey Show me the way home, honeyRegistered User regular
    I hope he got an extra slice for that.

    Hey Satan | Social Links
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    Rhesus PositiveRhesus Positive GNU Terry Pratchett Registered User regular


    Shameless promotion of a joke I thought of on Friday

    [Muffled sounds of gorilla violence]
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    Mr FuzzbuttMr Fuzzbutt Registered User regular
    2lY0sVs.jpg

    broken image link
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    JedocJedoc In the scuppers with the staggers and jagsRegistered User regular
    I cursed your heart today, Mr Fuzzbutt. I cursed it.

    GDdCWMm.jpg
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    GarthorGarthor Registered User regular
    Oh shit, I am hungry!

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    honoverehonovere Registered User regular
    Amazon is adapting Consider Phebas?

    I'm sure that's going to be a trainwreck.

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    djmitchelladjmitchella Registered User regular

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    PerrsunPerrsun Registered User regular

    Xbox - Last.fm - PSN
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    joshofalltradesjoshofalltrades Class Traitor Smoke-filled roomRegistered User regular
    Not really a joke per se, more of a prank, but this house is in my neighborhood and I found it pretty amusing:

    jxgbck1xvbno.jpeg

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    Rhesus PositiveRhesus Positive GNU Terry Pratchett Registered User regular
    Went dancing at a marine club last night

    Pulled a mussel

    [Muffled sounds of gorilla violence]
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    Rhesus PositiveRhesus Positive GNU Terry Pratchett Registered User regular
    We're currently doing a bank holiday rubbish tip run, and the person in front of us just threw away two golf bags.

    Mrs Rhesus: "That seems a waste, I bet a charity shop would take them."

    Me: "Maybe there's a hole in one."

    [Muffled sounds of gorilla violence]
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    3cl1ps33cl1ps3 I will build a labyrinth to house the cheese Registered User regular
    Rhesus Positive wrote: »
    We're currently doing a bank holiday rubbish tip run, and the person in front of us just threw away two golf bags.

    Mrs Rhesus: "That seems a waste, I bet a charity shop would take them."

    Me: "Maybe there's a hole in one."

    You're fired.

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    BedlamBedlam Registered User regular
    Gl1EOde.jpg

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    PolaritiePolaritie Sleepy Registered User regular
    Bedlam wrote: »
    Gl1EOde.jpg

    ...So is that a divorce or a marraige?

    Steam: Polaritie
    3DS: 0473-8507-2652
    Switch: SW-5185-4991-5118
    PSN: AbEntropy
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    ElvenshaeElvenshae Registered User regular
    Polaritie wrote: »
    Bedlam wrote: »
    Gl1EOde.jpg

    ...So is that a divorce or a marraige?

    Yes.

    omgbfz5lzi1s.png
    Steam: Elvenshae // PSN: Elvenshae // WotC: Elvenshae
    Wilds of Aladrion: [https://forums.penny-arcade.com/discussion/comment/43159014/#Comment_43159014]Ellandryn[/url]
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    Munkus BeaverMunkus Beaver You don't have to attend every argument you are invited to. Philosophy: Stoicism. Politics: Democratic SocialistRegistered User, ClubPA regular
    Bedlam wrote: »
    Gl1EOde.jpg

    This is the saddest way to break up with someone, my God

    Humor can be dissected as a frog can, but dies in the process.
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    MichaelLCMichaelLC In what furnace was thy brain? ChicagoRegistered User regular
    Elvenshae wrote: »
    Polaritie wrote: »
    Bedlam wrote: »
    Gl1EOde.jpg

    ...So is that a divorce or a marraige?

    Yes.

    They always were a prickly pair.

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    JedocJedoc In the scuppers with the staggers and jagsRegistered User regular
    Plus, I always thought he was a bit of a prick.

    GDdCWMm.jpg
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    PinfeldorfPinfeldorf Yeah ZestRegistered User regular
    Joke about giving up fellatio for lent turning succulent into a pun.

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    BedlamBedlam Registered User regular
    co2Lpg1.png

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    AngelHedgieAngelHedgie Registered User regular
    This was posted in the YouTube thread, but this is where it belongs:

    https://youtu.be/PWwvR6cSH4o

    XBL: Nox Aeternum / PSN: NoxAeternum / NN:NoxAeternum / Steam: noxaeternum
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    see317see317 Registered User regular
    AngelHedgie wrote: »
    This was posted in the YouTube thread, but this is where it belongs:

    https://youtu.be/PWwvR6cSH4o

    I have to say, if Dad Joke Kratos was a thing, it might be the DLC that sold me GoW (and the PlayStation needed to play it).

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    PaperLuigi44PaperLuigi44 My amazement is at maximum capacity. Registered User regular
    Damn it, I had a great joke about legs but I've forgotten it. I hate amkneesia.

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    BedlamBedlam Registered User regular
    T7STwkV.jpg

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    JoolanderJoolander Registered User regular
    edited May 2018
    AngelHedgie wrote: »
    This was posted in the YouTube thread, but this is where it belongs:

    https://youtu.be/PWwvR6cSH4o

    I never realized that Kratos is played by Teal’c

    e: wtf autocorrect

    Joolander on
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    see317see317 Registered User regular
    Joolander wrote: »
    AngelHedgie wrote: »
    This was posted in the YouTube thread, but this is where it belongs:

    https://youtu.be/PWwvR6cSH4o

    I beaver realized that Kratos is played but Teal’c

    Pretty sure he just started in the role for this game.
    I've heard he also did the motion capture for the role.

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    tzeentchlingtzeentchling Doctor of Rocks OaklandRegistered User regular
    edited May 2018
    kne83e5szq13.png

    tzeentchling on
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    PinfeldorfPinfeldorf Yeah ZestRegistered User regular
    I don't understand why that is a joke but I immediately understand anyone who gets it is a nerd.

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    TaminTamin Registered User regular
    it's a little overcooked, but
    - alien dude comes to earth, doesn't know anything about anything
    - sees a butterfly, asks, "is this a pigeon?"

    the general meme is to overlay some other concept (usually in text) onto the butterfly, and then edit 'pigeon' to match

    this iteration places the words in the rough shape of a geographical feature, and then edits the subtitle to create the word describing said feature.

    looking at some others, I'm not sure if the speaker is supposed to be wrong or if being accurate is valid; so a funnier take might be for the butterfly to be an island, with the same subtitle edit.

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    pimentopimento she/they/pim Registered User regular
    Ohhh.....

    I get jokes.

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    3cl1ps33cl1ps3 I will build a labyrinth to house the cheese Registered User regular
    tzeentchling wrote: »
    kne83e5szq13.png

    this is actually my favorite version of this meme yet

    jfc i'm such a geek

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    PinfeldorfPinfeldorf Yeah ZestRegistered User regular
    Tamin wrote: »
    it's a little overcooked, but
    - alien dude comes to earth, doesn't know anything about anything
    - sees a butterfly, asks, "is this a pigeon?"

    the general meme is to overlay some other concept (usually in text) onto the butterfly, and then edit 'pigeon' to match

    this iteration places the words in the rough shape of a geographical feature, and then edits the subtitle to create the word describing said feature.

    looking at some others, I'm not sure if the speaker is supposed to be wrong or if being accurate is valid; so a funnier take might be for the butterfly to be an island, with the same subtitle edit.

    Nerds!

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    RingoRingo He/Him a distinct lack of substanceRegistered User regular
    I made a thing with pictures of my new kitten

    2FFx2Is.jpg

    8EdhiTG.jpg

    Sterica wrote: »
    I know my last visit to my grandpa on his deathbed was to find out how the whole Nazi werewolf thing turned out.
    Edcrab's Exigency RPG
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    MichaelLCMichaelLC In what furnace was thy brain? ChicagoRegistered User regular
    If there was ever a post deserving of reviving the Awesome Post forum...

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    joshofalltradesjoshofalltrades Class Traitor Smoke-filled roomRegistered User regular
    I’m going to open a restaurant chain called “I Don’t Care” so people can go to that place their spouse is always talking about.

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    PinfeldorfPinfeldorf Yeah ZestRegistered User regular
    I want to open a bar catered to lawyers near a courthouse and called it "You've Been Served".

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    pimentopimento she/they/pim Registered User regular
    I used to work around the corner from a bar called The Point. It quickly because The Evacuation Point when they were silly enough to do a fire drill on a friday afternoon.

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    BedlamBedlam Registered User regular
    Pinfeldorf wrote: »
    I want to open a bar catered to lawyers near a courthouse and called it "You've Been Served".
    That sounds more like a restaurant where you have to dance-fight the waiter in order to get your meal.

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    see317see317 Registered User regular
    Bedlam wrote: »
    Pinfeldorf wrote: »
    I want to open a bar catered to lawyers near a courthouse and called it "You've Been Served".
    That sounds more like a restaurant where you have to dance-fight the waiter in order to get your meal.
    No, that one's "You got served".
    I imagine there's going to be a lot of confusion between the two.

    And a bad joke I told my DM recently:
    An elf, a dwarf and a tiefling walk into a tavern.
    All three make their saves against bad jokes.
    The end.

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    Karrde1842Karrde1842 Registered User regular
    edited May 2018
    joshofalltrades wrote: »
    I’m going to open a restaurant chain called “I Don’t Care” so people can go to that place their spouse is always talking about.

    Followed soon by its sister chain, "You Decide"?

    Karrde1842 on
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Penny Arcade Forums› Social Entropy++