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Secret Satans 2018 - Gifting complete!

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Posts

  • SnicketysnickSnicketysnick The Greatest Hype Man in WesterosRegistered User regular
    edited December 2018
    Depends how big an item it is. If it fits on the desk*, definitely but otherwise the floor (we have laminate) is the backup.

    *without having to move half the things

    A firm surface is needed for creasing though, I can't get a sharp corner on carpet.

    Snicketysnick on
    7qmGNt5.png
    D3 Steam #TeamTangent STO
  • BucketmanBucketman Call me SkraggRegistered User regular
    I'm a floor guy myself.

    XaquinSlacker71
  • MuzzmuzzMuzzmuzz Registered User regular
    I've always been a floor person myself, seeing as my tables are always cluttered....


    Which is a problem because my floor is also cluttered.

    Brovid HasselsmofceresSlacker71Goatmon
  • CelloCello Registered User regular
    The floor is an easier place for me to cut things without absentmindedly cutting the thing underneath, and it's also where I cut fabrics, so

    Steam
    3DS Friend Code: 0216-0898-6512
    Switch Friend Code: SW-7437-1538-7786
    tynicBucketmanKetBraSlacker71
  • BroloBrolo Broseidon Lord of the BroceanRegistered User regular
    gift bags mean I haven't wrapped a present in paper in at least a decade

    BucketmanCaulk Bite 6E.Coyotesee317Goatmon
  • Brovid HasselsmofBrovid Hasselsmof [Growling historic on the fury road] Registered User regular
    I might go that route in future. I used to be good at wrapping when I was a teenager but I swear I get worse every year. All my gifts look like a chimp wrapped them.

  • #pipe#pipe Cocky Stride, Musky odours Pope of Chili TownRegistered User regular
    I just got a notification from my US mail service that a package is waiting for me :O

    TonkkaRankenphileCaulk Bite 6RainfallGoatmon
  • Blackhawk1313Blackhawk1313 Registered User regular
    On floor for me because it does not matter what surface or how hard I try to wrap with precision, it will always be an abomination of a wrapping job. So... usually @Ladybug2332 does it for me... but I can't even fall back on that this year with her on travel so... awful wrapping it is!

  • .. Registered User, ClubPA regular
    #pipe wrote: »
    I just got a notification from my US mail service that a package is waiting for me :O

    Don't take the bait! It's just Tonkka still trying to show everyone their package.

    And I wrap presents on the floor because we have wood floors. If I'm stuck wrapping somewhere carpeted, I have to move to a table or put down something smooth or I get crinkledy paper. Well, crinkled-ier paper. It's a disaster either way.

    Gimme stuff. Please. And I don't just mean my Secret Satan.
  • BroloBrolo Broseidon Lord of the BroceanRegistered User regular
    I actually made a child cry once my wrapping was so bad

    my neice was like... 4 or 5, and her mom had wrapped absolutely everything immaculately under this martha-stewart esque tree:

    M2vgLpAl.jpg

    and all the gift wrapping was colour coordinated and perfect

    and then I brought my shitty presents over and put them under the tree and they looked like this:

    Fkl1JuGl.jpg

    so I had this little girl yelling

    "no! they're UGLY! you RUINED them! you RUINED CHRISTMAS!"

    and she just wouldn't stop crying

    it was gift bags from then onwards

    Brovid Hasselsmof.ceresXaquintynicNogginN1tSt4lkerchrishallett83KadithStraightziTonkkaGoose!CelloSkeithTofystedethSnicketysnicklonelyahavaBucketmanBlake TCaulk Bite 6IloveslimesLalaboxPlatyVeldrinDashDKetBragodmodeSporkAndrewSlacker71see317Fishmanakajaybaypooka
  • .. Registered User, ClubPA regular
    Hope you threw those horribly wrapped presents right in her crying face. Also, wow.

    Gimme stuff. Please. And I don't just mean my Secret Satan.
    chrishallett83BucketmanCaulk Bite 6SporkAndrew
  • ceresceres When the last moon is cast over the last star of morning And the future has past without even a last desperate warningRegistered User, Moderator mod
    I always try to use a sturdy, pretty box if I can, that way if they hate the gift they can at least reuse the box

    And it seems like all is dying, and would leave the world to mourn
    satan
    BroloTonkkaCaulk Bite 6Lalabox
  • PerrsunPerrsun Registered User regular
    I might go that route in future. I used to be good at wrapping when I was a teenager but I swear I get worse every year. All my gifts look like a chimp wrapped them.

    This is how I feel. Right after high school I worked at a book store, and during those years I could wrap a rectangle perfectly in a matter of seconds.

    Now, the inside of the paper is peaking out, corners aren’t aligned. It’s a mess.

  • tynictynic PICNIC BADASS Registered User, ClubPA regular
    "Wrapping paper isn't environmentally friendly", I say, as I hurl a package of discounted sports socks with the price tag still attached in the direction of the christmas tree.

    XaquinPerrsunBrovid Hasselsmofchrishallett83BroloRaijin QuickfootTonkkaCelloceresSkeithTofystedethSnicketysnicklonelyahavaBucketmanCaulk Bite 6VeldrinKetBragodmodeSporkAndrewFishman
  • GrobianGrobian What's on sale? Pliers!Registered User regular
    Nullzone wrote: »
    No pics, but yesterday a package arrived that I can only assume is from my Satan...

    ...because inside was a product titled UNICORN SNOT.

    It's a clear liquid lip gloss along with several pots of loose glitter powder in different colors. Gonna get ALL bedazzled up in this biz.

    Many thanks, Satan!

    You're welcome and happy holidays! This concludes my sataning.

    PoGo friend code: 7835 1672 4968
    Nullzone
  • chrishallett83chrishallett83 Amazon: shorturl.at/giJSV Steam: shorturl.at/ftCLSRegistered User regular
    tynic wrote: »
    "Wrapping paper isn't environmentally friendly", I say, as I hurl a package of discounted sports socks with the price tag still attached in the direction of the christmas tree.

    Yes.

  • tynictynic PICNIC BADASS Registered User, ClubPA regular
    Mind you it's always very tempting to wrap the dog's gifts, because they really love tearing off the paper.

    CelloSkeithSnicketysnickBucketmanCaulk Bite 6VeldrinDashDgodmodeSporkAndrew
  • XaquinXaquin Right behind you!Registered User regular
    I got our dog a big pork bone for christmas and he is so upset that I wrapped it up and won't give it to him right now

    tynicTonkkaSkeithBucketmanCaulk Bite 6Veldringodmode
  • NogginNoggin Registered User regular
    "A dog who never eats pork bone is never a whole dog" - Pork bone vendor

    Battletag: Noggin#1936
    BroloBucketman
  • Raijin QuickfootRaijin Quickfoot I'm your Huckleberry YOU'RE NO DAISYRegistered User, ClubPA regular
    I cannot wrap. It's always terrible.

    HEY SATAN! HERE'S MY WISHLIST! GO NUTS YOU DEVIL!

    https://www.amazon.com/gp/registry/wishlist/1JI9WWSRW1YJI
  • Brovid HasselsmofBrovid Hasselsmof [Growling historic on the fury road] Registered User regular
    edited December 2018
    To my Satan, should you happen to read this: one of the items I put in my ideas post was a coat. I have just bought myself one because Regatta were having a sale and it's fecking midwinter so it was quite silly not having a coat. Obviously if by some chance you have acquired me a coat I will still be most grateful - nothing wrong with having multiple coats after all - but it is no longer as necessary an item as it was.

    I realise I am the worst kind of person for buying myself things right before xmas but in my defence it is cold.

    Brovid Hasselsmof on
  • CelloCello Registered User regular
    On the drive home, a beleaguered postman called me twice to say he had packages and he wanted to drop them off and could I please open the door, please, despite me pressing the button that should have done that several times

    Apparently it worked eventually because I got in and BAM, PRESENTS
    Doom Patrol! It looks good as hell!

    vwoz7qgg4w38.jpeg

    And Howard the Duck! Featuring every one of my favourite Marvel characters, apparently! And Extremely Canadian Man, Chip Zdarsky!

    ef2ggh4gu0fj.jpeg

    I am very excited to read both! Thanks, Lord Or Lady Of Darkness!

    Steam
    3DS Friend Code: 0216-0898-6512
    Switch Friend Code: SW-7437-1538-7786
    BroloXaquinTofystedethSnicketysnick.lonelyahavaBucketmanPsykomaGoose!LalaboxCaulk Bite 6IloveslimesPlatyVeldrinGrobianchrishallett83NogginDashDTonkkagodmodeN1tSt4lkerSporkAndrewSlacker71Fishman
  • TofystedethTofystedeth veni, veneri, vamoosi Registered User regular
    Christmas is the only time I wrap gifts. I wrap boxes pretty okay. I got my niece a stuffed TRex last year, and since she was only 1 I didn't even box it, just loosely wrapped it. My sister had such a look on her face when she pulled the weird lumpy thing out of the bag. Totally worth it.

    steam_sig.png
  • QuickSnapQuickSnap Registered User regular
    Satanee, I had to make a hard choice today. Replace my breaks, or buy your gifts.

    That was actually not a very hard decision for me to make. Your gifts are ordered and on the way. <3:D

    "A little bit esoteric. Just bare with him, he'll get it right eventually; or drink himself death. Which wouldn't be the worst thing in the world, really."



    Hey Satan! Look over here!!

    BroloXaquinTonkkaSlacker71
  • RankenphileRankenphile Passersby were amazed by the unusually large amounts of blood.Registered User, Moderator mod
    I never thought it would be me saying this, but...

    Please don’t die or kill anybody else on the streets for Satan.

    Raijin Quickfoot.Caulk Bite 6TonkkaLost SalientBucketman
  • Goose!Goose! That's me, honey Show me the way home, honeyRegistered User regular
    Satan has bequeathed me a gift

    exvb9ndehx4b.jpg
    It came in this package, so I opened it up and...

    9zxokiw29uzh.jpg
    Oh! A space pen! It can write at any angle, even in zero gravity!

    texv9bfp2df2.jpg
    And also it just looks really cool. There was a message...

    5l8d1mtjznax.jpg
    That's...not very illuminating. Never the less, thank you, Satan!

    NaphtaliCaulk Bite 6tynicRaijin QuickfootCelloPlaty.Veldrinchrishallett83NogginTonkkaTofystedethGrobianSnicketysnickgodmodeN1tSt4lkerSporkAndrewIloveslimesSlacker71Lost SalientFishmanBucketmanpooka
  • Raijin QuickfootRaijin Quickfoot I'm your Huckleberry YOU'RE NO DAISYRegistered User, ClubPA regular
    Oh shit! Sagat Satan?

    HEY SATAN! HERE'S MY WISHLIST! GO NUTS YOU DEVIL!

    https://www.amazon.com/gp/registry/wishlist/1JI9WWSRW1YJI
    Caulk Bite 6chrishallett83RanlinPerrsun#pipeGoose!BroloSporkAndrewFishmanBucketman
  • LasbrookLasbrook It takes a lot to make a stew When it comes to me and youRegistered User regular
    Obviously Mary Jane Watson is your Satan.
    Or perhaps a certain man from Thailand has returned to uppercut their way into your heart.

    Raijin QuickfootCelloXaquinSnicketysnickGoose!Bucketman
  • StraightziStraightzi Here we may reign secure, and in my choice, To reign is worth ambition though in HellRegistered User regular
    Oh I have one of those pens as my daily carry, it's very good

  • PlatyPlaty Registered User regular
    To my Satan, should you happen to read this: one of the items I put in my ideas post was a coat. I have just bought myself one because Regatta were having a sale and it's fecking midwinter so it was quite silly not having a coat. Obviously if by some chance you have acquired me a coat I will still be most grateful - nothing wrong with having multiple coats after all - but it is no longer as necessary an item as it was.

    I realise I am the worst kind of person for buying myself things right before xmas but in my defence it is cold.

    Curious me looked at your wishpost and it seems your wishlist link is dead

    I wanted to see which tarot deck you chose

  • DashDDashD Dread Pirate Chef Seattle, WARegistered User regular
    I got super excited, there were two boxes waiting at the office! But they were for my roommates. Oh well.

    Then I picked up the mail from the box. All bills. And, I've been summoned for jury duty.

    This feels like the work of Satan, but it's hard to tell...


    "Brilliant! Oh wait, if we were meant to fly, we would have been born with little bags of nuts."
    PAX_Badge_Sig.png
    Tonkkaceres
  • MadicanMadican No face Registered User regular
    I wrap on any available flat surface, always on Christmas Eve since I don't have many to do and this way I get the run of all available supplies. Because when I wrap gifts myself I never wrap them...normally. In my family it's almost a game to see how amusing you can make the gifting experience. Everything is fair game, so long as the actual gift eventually finds its way to the giftee, even if it took precisely seven decoy gifts with clues to alert them to look under the cushion of the chair they were sitting on.

    I think my best one was the year I made my brother's gift into a cat and he used medical equipment to perform surgery on it to extract the gift without destroying the wrapping. I may even have a picture saved, let me go check my album. Yep!

    Before surgery
    0r5f2x8l.jpg

    After surgery
    qI3hSsel.jpg

    camo_sig2.png
    PSN: AuthorFrost
    mageofstorm.png
    PlatyVeldrinXaquinTonkkaTofystedethCaulk Bite 6JimBobtheMonkeyNogginVirgil_Leads_YouSnicketysnickgodmodeGoose!IloveslimesSlacker71ceresFishmanBucketmanpooka
  • DrZiplockDrZiplock Registered User regular
    Hail, Satan!

    You have worked your dark magics well, my lord. Whilst I have been away there have been machinations to send me further into the wilds. Perhaps to commune with nature and breath the free air? Nay, more likely so that I may find a place of dark solitude to cry out your praise.

    Thankfully, while I am seeking a place to properly worship you have provided me with some tools so that I may bring you success and glory.

    How very kind of you to think of my hydration needs. It is rather dry here in Southern CA.
    0OyQ8wzh.jpg

    GWMU5cqh.jpg
    GScPoU4h.jpg

    Clearly you are also understanding that, generally, the best worship of "dark works" usually happens at dark and nobody likes to stub their toes.
    Xkc8LOzh.jpg

    You're right! It's best to always keep a look out for those who wish to thwart our plans. It is also nice to scout out trails on the way to ritualistic circles.
    iELLhL2h.jpg

    Of course we both know that sometimes it's best to threaten to cut people in order to ply information from them so that you may properly screw them. Though, it might be easier to just offer them a beer and talk things over.
    SAUDdxeh.jpg

    Thanks, Brolo! These are some fun and awesome tools that will instantly be added to my kit. I actually found myself in a situation to need the flashlight just this past weekend so I was pretty lucky/happy to have already tossed it into my bag. Hooray! Happy Sataning!

    "zip, i dunno what it is about you, but there's something very cat-like about your face. i can't really place it. you'd make a good mountain lion." Hail, Satan!
    PlatyTonkkaNaphtali.CelloXaquinCaulk Bite 6MadicanRankenphileJimBobtheMonkeyBroloNogginlonelyahavaSkeithGrobianSnicketysnickgodmodeGoose!SporkAndrewIloveslimesSlacker71VeldrinFishmanBucketmanpooka
  • StericaSterica Yes Registered User, Moderator mod
    edited December 2018
    WRONG CHRISTMAS THREAD

    Sterica on
    YL9WnCY.png
    BroloRaijin QuickfootCaulk Bite 6Goose!TonkkaceresBucketman
  • Brovid HasselsmofBrovid Hasselsmof [Growling historic on the fury road] Registered User regular
    Platy wrote: »
    To my Satan, should you happen to read this: one of the items I put in my ideas post was a coat. I have just bought myself one because Regatta were having a sale and it's fecking midwinter so it was quite silly not having a coat. Obviously if by some chance you have acquired me a coat I will still be most grateful - nothing wrong with having multiple coats after all - but it is no longer as necessary an item as it was.

    I realise I am the worst kind of person for buying myself things right before xmas but in my defence it is cold.

    Curious me looked at your wishpost and it seems your wishlist link is dead

    I wanted to see which tarot deck you chose

    Oh thanks, I've fixed it now. I was using the wrong kind of link because I am an elderly person who doesn't understand computers.

  • Goose!Goose! That's me, honey Show me the way home, honeyRegistered User regular
    Oh shit! Sagat Satan?

    Man I had forgotten about Sagat Satan. Thanks, Sagat Satan. You win!

  • JayKaosJayKaos Registered User regular
    Oh shit, I thought Satan was done with me, but the dark lord must've had a few more tricks up his sleeve - package waiting for me this morning:
    MfqqSKt.jpg

    Just what I needed to ensure all my assorted nerderies are on display.

    And when combined with the signature from the last note, it seems my Satan goes by "N.A.Phtali", clearly some kind of secret code which I'll need more time to decipher.
    Thanks so much, @Naphtali , and happy Satanmas!

    Steam | SW-0844-0908-6004 and my Switch code
    BroloBrovid HasselsmofGoose!TonkkaSlacker71chrishallett83XaquinNoggin.SnicketysnickPlatyVeldringodmodeCaulk Bite 6cerestynicIloveslimesGrobianNaphtaliRainfallFishmanN1tSt4lkerBucketman
  • StraightziStraightzi Here we may reign secure, and in my choice, To reign is worth ambition though in HellRegistered User regular
    edited December 2018
    There has been another delivery. A large paper envelope this time.
    3BZlLD1.jpg

    I readied a small arsenal to deal with this one.

    ADhljcA.jpg

    Turning the envelope over, I found a message written there.

    Bk5U6n0.jpg

    "OPEN CAREFULLY

    (NO KNIVES)"

    Listen, if you knew the kind of week I've been having...

    wcqa60j.jpg

    But fine, no knives. I'll just tear it open. It's only paper.

    LlRgOp7.jpg

    It tore open quickly, almost as if it wanted to be opened.

    LOqTwZp.jpg

    And then continued, rapidly coiling up and around my arm.

    Eopqpai.jpg

    I grabbed a knife to try to deal with it before it got too far.

    0SRtUdQ.jpg

    But it was too fast for me, wrapping itself around my neck and causing me to drop my knife.

    4wKWODV.jpg

    84EnuB2.jpg

    OhXlQ46.jpg

    8ir1276.jpg

    After all... it's only paper.

    puA7AZI.jpg

    With the beast burned down, I went to examine the contents of the package.

    U4uF8sJ.jpg

    "A TRIBUTE

    N.R. DEVIL"

    3BkWT7n.jpg

    Well, would you look at that handsome devil?

    Thank you @NRDEVIL! I love it!

    Straightzi on
    PlatySkeithRaijin QuickfootceresLalaboxIloveslimes.Goose!XaquinNogginVeldrinCaulk Bite 6TonkkaGrobianchrishallett83lonelyahavaSnicketysnickPsykomaNaphtaliSlacker71SporkAndrewFishmanN1tSt4lkerNullzoneBucketmanpooka
  • RankenphileRankenphile Passersby were amazed by the unusually large amounts of blood.Registered User, Moderator mod
    This entire series has been fantastic.

    Everyone keep giving him gifts, I want to see this spiral out of control.

    Raijin QuickfootXaquinStraightziCaulk Bite 6TonkkalonelyahavaSlacker71FishmanN1tSt4lkerBucketman
  • .. Registered User, ClubPA regular
    I don't even know what the gifts are anymore. Are there gifts? Just continue.

    Gimme stuff. Please. And I don't just mean my Secret Satan.
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