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There Once Was A Man From Nantucket

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Posts

  • wanderingwandering Russia state-affiliated media Registered User regular
    edited April 10
    I'm sorry, I'm, uh, bothering you with all these write-ups, I'll get out of your hair.

    Oh, there is one other thing...

    I really enjoyed "Murder by the Book" (1971), which I guess is technically the first episode of the first season. It has the same basic structure as the previous episode (Columbo showing up within 15 minutes instead of halfway through, Columbo seeming to know basically from the beginning who the killer is), and I'm still a little dubious about this structure, but I gotta admit this episode slaps, to use the parlance of our time.

    1. Peter Falk really settles into the role. I didn't mention it but I actually found him a little grating and over-the-top in the last episode. Here, he's maximally charming. 2. There's a very delightful scene where Columbo takes the victim's wife home and cooks her an omelet. 3. The smarmy mystery writer is a fun villain. 4. The episode was filmed with a lot of panache: it's always doing something interesting with the camera. It opens with a great Hitchockian shot that swoops from the LA cityscape to a writer tapping away at a keyboard, for example.

    Apparently the episode was directed by some guy named "Steven Spielberg". Wonder what else he's done

    RmVwZ4q.jpg?1

    Chairman Meow on
  • JacobkoshJacobkosh Gamble a stamp. I can show you how to be a real man!Moderator mod
    edited April 10
    I've seen this one! My dad and I were at the family cabin in the Ozarks a year or two ago and it came up on the rerun channel that's one of the like 3 channels we get out there. I really loved it. I specifically remember it because we both did a double-take when Spielberg's name popped up.

    Chairman Meow on
  • PreacherPreacher Registered User regular
    edited April 10
    Jacobkosh wrote: »
    I've seen this one! My dad and I were at the family cabin in the Ozarks a year or two ago and it came up on the rerun channel that's one of the like 3 channels we get out there. I really loved it. I specifically remember it because we both did a double-take when Spielberg's name popped up.

    The full episode is actually up on youtube, along with some others.

    Chairman Meow on
    I would like some money because these are artisanal nuggets of wisdom philistine.

    pleasepaypreacher.net
  • tynictynic PICNIC BADASS Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited April 10
    I also was unaware of the exact wording of the poem
    I can see the TMNT and Columbo existing in the same universe, sure.

    Chairman Meow on
  • JedocJedoc In the scuppers with the staggers and jagsRegistered User regular
    edited April 10
    7opuoa95m33e.png

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    GDdCWMm.jpg
  • astrobstrdastrobstrd So full of mercy... Registered User regular
    edited April 10
    Yes of course I know the poem
    Well, Mr. Krang, that all seems to check out, that makes sense...

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    Selling the Scream Podcast: https://anchor.fm/jeremy-donaldson
  • astrobstrdastrobstrd So full of mercy... Registered User regular
    edited April 10
    Yes of course I know the poem
    But just one last thing...

    Chairman Meow on
    Selling the Scream Podcast: https://anchor.fm/jeremy-donaldson
  • wanderingwandering Russia state-affiliated media Registered User regular
    edited April 10
    I'd be down for a new live action Columbo series. There are so many new types of rich douches for Columbo to clown on. Techbro CEOs, transphobic british comedians, psuedo-intellectual alt-right nazis...

    No doubt no one could fully fill Falk's shoes but no one says there shouldn't be more Winnie the Pooh, Sherlock Holmes, or Doctor Who just because the best Pooh (Sterling Holloway), Holmes (Jeremy Brett), and Doctor (Christopher Eccleston :bzz:) are no longer available...

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  • Donovan PuppyfuckerDonovan Puppyfucker A dagger in the dark is worth a thousand swords in the morningRegistered User regular
    edited April 10
    Who can portray that easy charisma so effortlessly, though?

    Perhaps John Hamm?

    I don't think he'd be the right fit though.

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  • wanderingwandering Russia state-affiliated media Registered User regular
    edited April 10
    I definitely see John Hamm as guest-star villain rather than as Columbo.

    I'm thinking talent search for a relatively unknown working class actor with a glass eye

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  • Rhesus PositiveRhesus Positive GNU Terry Pratchett Registered User regular
    edited April 10
    Yes of course I know the poem
    Adrian Brody sold all his stuff to get into character for an audition

    I wonder if he'd poke his eye out for a shot at Columbo

    Chairman Meow on
    [Muffled sounds of gorilla violence]
  • GrogGrog My sword is only steel in a useful shape.Registered User regular
    edited April 10
    who'd be a good cast for genderswap columbo?

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  • MorivethMoriveth BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWNRegistered User regular
    edited April 10
    I still think Mark Ruffalo would be a good Columbo

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  • PreacherPreacher Registered User regular
    edited April 10
    Grog wrote: »
    who'd be a good cast for genderswap columbo?

    I could see Allison Tolman as a good female Columbo. She was great in season 1 of fargo

    For a dude, Patrick Wilson.

    Chairman Meow on
    I would like some money because these are artisanal nuggets of wisdom philistine.

    pleasepaypreacher.net
  • PhillisherePhillishere Registered User regular
    edited April 10
    Grog wrote: »
    who'd be a good cast for genderswap columbo?

    Aubrey Plaza. She's got the slouch, and Legion showed she can bounce from jovial and scattered to terrifyingly mean real quick.

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  • Centipede DamascusCentipede Damascus Registered User regular
    edited April 10
    I'd go for Natasha Lyonne or Ilana Glazer, myself

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  • tynictynic PICNIC BADASS Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited April 10
    I also was unaware of the exact wording of the poem
    I'd go for Natasha Lyonne or Ilana Glazer, myself

    oh yeah she'd kill that role

    Chairman Meow on
  • wanderingwandering Russia state-affiliated media Registered User regular
    edited April 10
    The Case For Making Columbo America’s Doctor Who

    [...] I dare you to look me square in the eye and tell me you would not watch Kathy Bates in a rumpled old trenchcoat trying to keep track of her notes among the young and beautiful and murderous. Or Giancarlo Esposito. Or Jake Johnson from New Girl in about fifteen years. Rhea Perlman. Sam Rockwell, that beautiful weirdo. JOHN C. REILLY. Danny Pudi, in about eight years. An unshaven Stanley Tucci. Danny Trejo. Richard Kind. Margo Martindale. John Cho. Each one would bring a different characteristic of Columbo’s to the forefront — his core kindness, his feigned absent-mindedness, his needling slyness, his love for animals, his whimsy, his native intelligence, his love for cigars.
    https://the-toast.net/2014/03/05/the-case-for-columbo/
    Ways In Which Lt. Columbo's Perfection Resembles The Perfection Of God

    [...] Columbo’s work is not merely to catch murderers, then, but to shine a light on even the littlest bit of niceness, or intelligence, or humor, or anything worthy of respect; as Abraham said to God before the destruction of Sodom, “Would You also destroy the righteous with the wicked?
    https://www.shatnerchatner.com/p/ways-in-which-lt-columbos-perfection

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  • tynictynic PICNIC BADASS Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited April 10
    I also was unaware of the exact wording of the poem
    Richard Schiff would be great.

    Chairman Meow on
  • wanderingwandering Russia state-affiliated media Registered User regular
    edited April 10
    tynic wrote: »
    I'd go for Natasha Lyonne or Ilana Glazer, myself

    oh yeah she'd kill that role
    yeah wrap it up, we're done, Natasha Lyonne Columbo is now what I need

    Chairman Meow on
  • FencingsaxFencingsax It is difficult to get a man to understand, when his salary depends upon his not understanding GNU Terry PratchettRegistered User regular
    edited April 10
    tynic wrote: »
    I'd go for Natasha Lyonne or Ilana Glazer, myself

    oh yeah she'd kill that role

    Well, probably not appropriate for Columbo then

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  • GrogGrog My sword is only steel in a useful shape.Registered User regular
    edited April 10
    wandering wrote: »
    The Case For Making Columbo America’s Doctor Who

    [...] I dare you to look me square in the eye and tell me you would not watch Kathy Bates in a rumpled old trenchcoat trying to keep track of her notes among the young and beautiful and murderous. Or Giancarlo Esposito. Or Jake Johnson from New Girl in about fifteen years. Rhea Perlman. Sam Rockwell, that beautiful weirdo. JOHN C. REILLY. Danny Pudi, in about eight years. An unshaven Stanley Tucci. Danny Trejo. Richard Kind. Margo Martindale. John Cho. Each one would bring a different characteristic of Columbo’s to the forefront — his core kindness, his feigned absent-mindedness, his needling slyness, his love for animals, his whimsy, his native intelligence, his love for cigars.
    https://the-toast.net/2014/03/05/the-case-for-columbo/

    fuck, danny absolutely killing it with these choices

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  • HoukHouk Nipples The EchidnaRegistered User regular
    edited April 10
    I also was unaware of the exact wording of the poem
    wandering wrote: »
    tynic wrote: »
    I'd go for Natasha Lyonne or Ilana Glazer, myself

    oh yeah she'd kill that role
    yeah wrap it up, we're done, Natasha Lyonne Columbo is now what I need

    Natasha Lyonne as Columbo 1, Mark Ruffalo as Columbo 2, one each episode, it's the same character and nobody ever mentions it.

    Chairman Meow on
  • Munkus BeaverMunkus Beaver You don't have to attend every argument you are invited to. Philosophy: Stoicism. Politics: Democratic SocialistRegistered User, ClubPA regular
    edited April 10
    wandering wrote: »
    tynic wrote: »
    I'd go for Natasha Lyonne or Ilana Glazer, myself

    oh yeah she'd kill that role
    yeah wrap it up, we're done, Natasha Lyonne Columbo is now what I need

    Natasha Lyonne as Columbo 1, Mark Ruffalo as Columbo 2, one each episode, it's the same character and nobody ever mentions it.

    Columbo and Coluumbo

    Chairman Meow on
    Humor can be dissected as a frog can, but dies in the process.
  • EncEnc A Fool with Compassion Pronouns: He, Him, HisRegistered User regular
    edited April 10
    Oh, and one more question...

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  • Munkus BeaverMunkus Beaver You don't have to attend every argument you are invited to. Philosophy: Stoicism. Politics: Democratic SocialistRegistered User, ClubPA regular
    edited April 10
    “No that’s not Colombo, that’s Slightly Bigger Colombo”

    Chairman Meow on
    Humor can be dissected as a frog can, but dies in the process.
  • Munkus BeaverMunkus Beaver You don't have to attend every argument you are invited to. Philosophy: Stoicism. Politics: Democratic SocialistRegistered User, ClubPA regular
    edited April 10
    TIL that my ipad thinks that Colombo is a word and Columbo isn't.

    My computer too, apparently.

    Chairman Meow on
    Humor can be dissected as a frog can, but dies in the process.
  • TheStigTheStig Registered User regular
    edited April 10
    I could go for a nice hot bowl of colombo.

    Chairman Meow on
    bnet: TheStig#1787 Steam: TheStig
  • WotanAnubisWotanAnubis Registered User regular
    edited April 10
    Watching some episodes, I'm starting to think Columbo would have a lot more trouble solving cases if the murderers didn't insist on weaving a bunch of fantastical tales at every one of his little 'confused' questions. Seems nobody ever told these people to never talk to the cops.

    Chairman Meow on
  • TheySlashThemTheySlashThem Registered User regular
    edited April 10
    that actually kind of adds to how much of an inversion of the usual cop show narrative columbo is, now that you mention it

    in most police procedurals, the only people who EVER refuse to talk, ask to see a warrant, ask for a lawyer, or otherwise exercise their rights when dealing with the cops, are the culprits (and we all know why this is the case, of course)

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  • tynictynic PICNIC BADASS Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited April 10
    I also was unaware of the exact wording of the poem
    apart from the narrative necessity, I think there's a strong psychological factor tied to Columbo's shambling grandfather schtick. He's clearly a bumbling idiot, so it seems harmless to spin him a story. And being rude to such a genial duffer by refusing to talk to him would require a will of absolute steel.

    Columbo would crack me like quail egg in five minutes and I probably wouldn't even notice.

    Chairman Meow on
  • Rhesus PositiveRhesus Positive GNU Terry Pratchett Registered User regular
    edited April 10
    Yes of course I know the poem
    Plus all the murderers are smug bastards who are probably getting off on fooling the police initially, and then they feel like they can't just turn it off once Columbo keeps digging lest they seem more suspicious

    Chairman Meow on
    [Muffled sounds of gorilla violence]
  • NaphtaliNaphtali Hazy + Flow SeaRegistered User regular
    edited April 10
    tynic wrote: »
    apart from the narrative necessity, I think there's a strong psychological factor tied to Columbo's shambling grandfather schtick. He's clearly a bumbling idiot, so it seems harmless to spin him a story. And being rude to such a genial duffer by refusing to talk to him would require a will of absolute steel.

    Columbo would crack me like quail egg in five minutes and I probably wouldn't even notice.

    you'd be the one handing over the pharaoh's staff then, you're saying

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  • tynictynic PICNIC BADASS Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited April 10
    I also was unaware of the exact wording of the poem
    Naphtali wrote: »
    tynic wrote: »
    apart from the narrative necessity, I think there's a strong psychological factor tied to Columbo's shambling grandfather schtick. He's clearly a bumbling idiot, so it seems harmless to spin him a story. And being rude to such a genial duffer by refusing to talk to him would require a will of absolute steel.

    Columbo would crack me like quail egg in five minutes and I probably wouldn't even notice.

    you'd be the one handing over the pharaoh's staff then, you're saying

    the fact I came out on the winning side of that game is a searing indictment of the detective skills of everyone else in the room.

    Chairman Meow on
  • NaphtaliNaphtali Hazy + Flow SeaRegistered User regular
    edited April 10
    tynic wrote: »
    Naphtali wrote: »
    tynic wrote: »
    apart from the narrative necessity, I think there's a strong psychological factor tied to Columbo's shambling grandfather schtick. He's clearly a bumbling idiot, so it seems harmless to spin him a story. And being rude to such a genial duffer by refusing to talk to him would require a will of absolute steel.

    Columbo would crack me like quail egg in five minutes and I probably wouldn't even notice.

    you'd be the one handing over the pharaoh's staff then, you're saying

    the fact I came out on the winning side of that game is a searing indictment of the detective skills of everyone else in the room.

    they failed to ask one more question, clearly

    Chairman Meow on
    Steam | Nintendo ID: Naphtali | Wish List
  • tynictynic PICNIC BADASS Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited April 10
    I also was unaware of the exact wording of the poem
    Naphtali wrote: »
    tynic wrote: »
    Naphtali wrote: »
    tynic wrote: »
    apart from the narrative necessity, I think there's a strong psychological factor tied to Columbo's shambling grandfather schtick. He's clearly a bumbling idiot, so it seems harmless to spin him a story. And being rude to such a genial duffer by refusing to talk to him would require a will of absolute steel.

    Columbo would crack me like quail egg in five minutes and I probably wouldn't even notice.

    you'd be the one handing over the pharaoh's staff then, you're saying

    the fact I came out on the winning side of that game is a searing indictment of the detective skills of everyone else in the room.

    they failed to ask one more question, clearly

    In the case of the detective, this is actually literally true because if he'd asked one more question I would have had to show him my ultimate goal card instead of my decoy goal card.
    But my decoy goal card cast me as a 19th century version of Michelle from 'Allo 'Allo and I was playing that to the hilt so I don't really blame him.

    Also I've always wanted to hiss "Listen very carefully, I shall say this only once" in a french accent in a setting where it's both appropriate and relevant. So many bucket list moments were hit that evening.

    Chairman Meow on
  • malikwaqas758malikwaqas758 Registered User new member
    edited April 10
    My favorite puzzles are the little things that look like other things

    From a distance, it looks like a normal store, but then you come closer and you realize that everything is made of matches and batteries.

    They combine a strange layer of difficulty and a layer of discovery for everything

    I like jigsaw puzzles too, but it's crazy

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  • PeasPeas Registered User regular
    edited April 10
    Does erotic stuff really fit well with jigsaw puzzles? I am just going to imagine that it will be really hard to concentrate, not to mention all the mess during the process

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  • DidgeDidge Flighty Dame Registered User regular
    edited April 10
    This feels weirdly appropriate

    64e9dc874de48c566516c59596919b56c2efe1c1.jpg

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