Guess who stayed up way too late blowing up ships and shanghaiing them into his fleet?
Blessed are you, Lord our God, creator of the universe, who has granted us horse meat. (Dr. Flamingo)
Blessed are you, Lord our God, creator of the universe, who has granted us pictures of boobs. (Cog)
Blessed are you, Lord our God, creator of the universe, who has granted us heteronormativity. (Boozer)
Blessed are you, Lord our God, creator of the universe, who has granted us MechaHitler. (Discrider)
Blessed are you, Lord our God, creator of the universe, who has granted us chainsaws for hands. (Extreaminatus) (*)
Blessed are you, Lord our God, creator of the universe, who has granted us Krampus, the Austrian Christmas monster. (Initiatefailure)
@Iongantas, who has the best angle for kickstarting their own religion?
You know, I actually remember a time before the internet. Hell I even remember when there weren't portable phones. Get off my lawn!
Kids these days with their iPods and their Internet. In my day, all we needed to pass the time was allowing nacho cheese to curdle in your beard while you creep in League of Legends. (Cog)
Kids these days with their iPods and their Internet. In my day, all we needed to pass the time was clearing a bloody path through Walmart with a scimitar. (Iongantas)
Kids these days with their iPods and their Internet. In my day, all we needed to pass the time was fisting. (Discrider)
Kids these days with their iPods and their Internet. In my day, all we needed to pass the time was masturbation. (Initiatefailure) (*)
Kids these days with their iPods and their Internet. In my day, all we needed to pass the time was the Star Wars Holiday Special. (Boozer)
Kids these days with their iPods and their Internet. In my day, all we needed to pass the time was the Amish. (Dr. Flamingo)
@Extreaminatus, what brings back fond memories that make you want to stroke your chin?
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ExtreaminatusGo forth and amplify,the Noise Marines are here!Registered Userregular
Lord knows my after class time passing was spent roughing up the suspect enough times a day that I could have been charged with cruel and unusual punishment.
Kids these days with their iPods and their Internet. In my day, all we needed to pass the time was masturbation.
But how will these kids learn how to make friends without participating in a healthy group activity such as fisting?
Only masturbation just stunts their social growth.
Ohhh, now I see.
I hadn't been exposed to the full range of masturbation applications obviously.
Must be based somewhat on socio-geographical factors.
Different strokes for different folks and all that.
It's interesting how some of the lines from Last Week Tonight could make good CAH answers. Two gems from the latest episode are "a clown made of mummified foreskin and cotton candy" and "a mint condition uterus".
Press DOWN DOWN LEFT RIGHT B to unleash a man in yoga pants with a ponytail and feather earrings. (Boozer)
Press DOWN DOWN LEFT RIGHT B to unleash crazy opium eyes. (Cog)
Press DOWN DOWN LEFT RIGHT B to unleash Rudolph's bright red balls. (Extreaminatus)
Press DOWN DOWN LEFT RIGHT B to unleash the bleeding ghostly foreskins of a thousand botched circumcisions. (Iongantas) (*)
Press DOWN DOWN LEFT RIGHT B to unleash when you fart and a little bit comes out. (Dr. Flamingo)
Press DOWN DOWN LEFT RIGHT B to unleash the Hawaiian goddess Kapo and her flying detachable vagina. (Discrider)
@Initiatefailure, what's got you wiggling your joystick like a madman?
... wut... I'm gonna have to think about this one. I like all of these and they all paint beautiful pictures.
but I think... I think in terms of a Super Combo to defeat your enemy, that the Shor- bleeding ghostly foreskins of a thousand botched circumcisions-yuken would be the most immediately devastating
Wow, that was fast. Guess everyone wanted to get to the cleaning off part ASAP.
Why am I sticky? Pulling out (Extreaminatus)
Why am I sticky? Flying sex snakes (Discrider) (*)
Why am I sticky? A low standard of living (Cog)
Why am I sticky? Girls that always be textin' (Boozer)
Why am I sticky? A cum-stained Starfleet Uniform (Initiatefailure)
Why am I sticky? A stick (Dr. Flamingo)
@Iongantas, why is the winner stuck to the ceiling?
Yes, Dr. Flamingo did deploy blank power with that answer. Credit where it's due, it was definitely an unexpected angle.
When I am a billionaire, I shall erect a 50-foot statue to commemorate the peaceful and nonthreatening rise of China. (Dr. Flamingo)
When I am a billionaire, I shall erect a 50-foot statue to commemorate fear itself. (Extreaminatus)
When I am a billionaire, I shall erect a 50-foot statue to commemorate statistically validated stereotypes. (Boozer)
When I am a billionaire, I shall erect a 50-foot statue to commemorate that ass. (Initiatefailure)
When I am a billionaire, I shall erect a 50-foot statue to commemorate being on fire. (Iongantas) (*)
When I am a billionaire, I shall erect a 50-foot statue to commemorate a black male in his early 20s, last seen wearing a hoodie. (Cog)
@Discrider, what would look best bellowing "REMEMBER ME!"?
Sometimes you have to wonder if the bigger freaks are up on stage or in the audience.
You've seen the bearded lady! You've seen the ring of fire! Now, ladies and gentlemen, feast your eyes upon the grey nutrient broth that sustains Mitt Romney! (Iongantas)
You've seen the bearded lady! You've seen the ring of fire! Now, ladies and gentlemen, feast your eyes upon a mime having a stroke! (Axman13)
You've seen the bearded lady! You've seen the ring of fire! Now, ladies and gentlemen, feast your eyes upon being a motherfucking sorcerer! (Dr. Flamingo)
You've seen the bearded lady! You've seen the ring of fire! Now, ladies and gentlemen, feast your eyes upon Her Majesty, Queen Elizabeth II! (Initiatefailure)
You've seen the bearded lady! You've seen the ring of fire! Now, ladies and gentlemen, feast your eyes upon testicular torsion! (Discrider) (*)
You've seen the bearded lady! You've seen the ring of fire! Now, ladies and gentlemen, feast your eyes upon police brutality! (Extreaminatus)
Michael Bay's new three-hour action epic pits Jean-Claude Van Damme against carnies. (Extreaminatus)
Michael Bay's new three-hour action epic pits actually taking candy from a baby against eating all the cookies before the AIDS bake-sale. (Dr. Flamingo)
Michael Bay's new three-hour action epic pits fabricating statistics against immaculate conception. (Axman13)
Michael Bay's new three-hour action epic pits three consecutive seconds of happiness against estrogen. (Initiatefailure)
Michael Bay's new three-hour action epic pits hot people against a big hoopla about nothing. (Discrider) (*)
Michael Bay's new three-hour action epic pits Sean Penn against an army of skeletons. (Iongantas)
@Boozer, what looks like it'll pack the most EPS (explosions per second)?
And the Academy Award for balls goes to Wil Wheaton crashing an actual spaceship. (Cog)
And the Academy Award for failing out of college, not having a job and never leaving my basement goes to my worthless son. (Extreaminatus)
And the Academy Award for making a pouty face goes to The Little Engine That Could. (Boozer)
And the Academy Award for having sex on top of a pizza goes to 72 virgins. (Dr. Flamingo)
And the Academy Award for a mating display goes to William Shatner. (Discrider) (*)
And the Academy Award for liking big butts and not being able to lie about it goes to Roland the Farter, flatulist to the king. (Initiatefailure)
When I am a billionaire, I shall erect a 50-foot statue to commemorate being on fire.
Bit miffed I couldn't convert surging into the lead into a win.
But it was a pretty good game, especially towards the end there.
Next game: Get a single blank black card, and win the game because 10 points instead of 9
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Viagra
Blessed are you, Lord our God, creator of the universe, who has granted us horse meat. (Dr. Flamingo)
Blessed are you, Lord our God, creator of the universe, who has granted us pictures of boobs. (Cog)
Blessed are you, Lord our God, creator of the universe, who has granted us heteronormativity. (Boozer)
Blessed are you, Lord our God, creator of the universe, who has granted us MechaHitler. (Discrider)
Blessed are you, Lord our God, creator of the universe, who has granted us chainsaws for hands. (Extreaminatus) (*)
Blessed are you, Lord our God, creator of the universe, who has granted us Krampus, the Austrian Christmas monster. (Initiatefailure)
@Iongantas, who has the best angle for kickstarting their own religion?
Round 48: Extreaminatus is judging
Kids these days with their iPods and their Internet. In my day, all we needed to pass the time was _______.
Please PM your answers while Extreaminatus fondly remembers being able to play with keyboards and mice.
Calling a card always makes it weaker IMO.
Get off my lawn!
Kids these days with their iPods and their Internet. In my day, all we needed to pass the time was allowing nacho cheese to curdle in your beard while you creep in League of Legends. (Cog)
Kids these days with their iPods and their Internet. In my day, all we needed to pass the time was clearing a bloody path through Walmart with a scimitar. (Iongantas)
Kids these days with their iPods and their Internet. In my day, all we needed to pass the time was fisting. (Discrider)
Kids these days with their iPods and their Internet. In my day, all we needed to pass the time was masturbation. (Initiatefailure) (*)
Kids these days with their iPods and their Internet. In my day, all we needed to pass the time was the Star Wars Holiday Special. (Boozer)
Kids these days with their iPods and their Internet. In my day, all we needed to pass the time was the Amish. (Dr. Flamingo)
@Extreaminatus, what brings back fond memories that make you want to stroke your chin?
Kids these days with their iPods and their Internet. In my day, all we needed to pass the time was masturbation.
Only masturbation just stunts their social growth.
Soggy biscuit?
Bukkake?
There's plenty of options, really.
I hadn't been exposed to the full range of masturbation applications obviously.
Must be based somewhat on socio-geographical factors.
Different strokes for different folks and all that.
Round 49: Initiatefailure is judging
Press DOWN DOWN LEFT RIGHT B to unleash _______.
Please PM your answers while Initiatefailure laments the cool down on the Sticky Cannon shot.
Press DOWN DOWN LEFT RIGHT B to unleash a man in yoga pants with a ponytail and feather earrings. (Boozer)
Press DOWN DOWN LEFT RIGHT B to unleash crazy opium eyes. (Cog)
Press DOWN DOWN LEFT RIGHT B to unleash Rudolph's bright red balls. (Extreaminatus)
Press DOWN DOWN LEFT RIGHT B to unleash the bleeding ghostly foreskins of a thousand botched circumcisions. (Iongantas) (*)
Press DOWN DOWN LEFT RIGHT B to unleash when you fart and a little bit comes out. (Dr. Flamingo)
Press DOWN DOWN LEFT RIGHT B to unleash the Hawaiian goddess Kapo and her flying detachable vagina. (Discrider)
@Initiatefailure, what's got you wiggling your joystick like a madman?
but I think... I think in terms of a Super Combo to defeat your enemy, that the Shor- bleeding ghostly foreskins of a thousand botched circumcisions-yuken would be the most immediately devastating
Round 50: Iongantas is judging
Why am I sticky?
Please PM your answers while Iongantas desperately attempts to evade an enraged Fasto.
Why am I sticky? Pulling out (Extreaminatus)
Why am I sticky? Flying sex snakes (Discrider) (*)
Why am I sticky? A low standard of living (Cog)
Why am I sticky? Girls that always be textin' (Boozer)
Why am I sticky? A cum-stained Starfleet Uniform (Initiatefailure)
Why am I sticky? A stick (Dr. Flamingo)
@Iongantas, why is the winner stuck to the ceiling?
Honorable mention to textin' girls and starfleet uniforms.
Hissssss*splurt*
Round 51: Discrider is judging
When I am a billionaire, I shall erect a 50-foot statue to commemorate _______.
Please PM your answers while Discrider plans a snake-friendly homage to bukkake.
Steam: Elvenshae // PSN: Elvenshae // WotC: Elvenshae
Wilds of Aladrion: [https://forums.penny-arcade.com/discussion/comment/43159014/#Comment_43159014]Ellandryn[/url]
I would have written "Being a stick" if it was.
But if "a stick" is a prior CAH card, then it was the best play.
When I am a billionaire, I shall erect a 50-foot statue to commemorate the peaceful and nonthreatening rise of China. (Dr. Flamingo)
When I am a billionaire, I shall erect a 50-foot statue to commemorate fear itself. (Extreaminatus)
When I am a billionaire, I shall erect a 50-foot statue to commemorate statistically validated stereotypes. (Boozer)
When I am a billionaire, I shall erect a 50-foot statue to commemorate that ass. (Initiatefailure)
When I am a billionaire, I shall erect a 50-foot statue to commemorate being on fire. (Iongantas) (*)
When I am a billionaire, I shall erect a 50-foot statue to commemorate a black male in his early 20s, last seen wearing a hoodie. (Cog)
@Discrider, what would look best bellowing "REMEMBER ME!"?
If only because it would be awesome if this were @Iongantas 's winning card.
But also because I would totally order a statue of me on fire.
IONGANTAS VICTORY!
Thank you everyone for helping break in the new thread. The next game will likely start Wednesday.
PSN: Boozer_777
Bit miffed I couldn't convert surging into the lead into a win.
But it was a pretty good game, especially towards the end there.
Next game: Get a single blank black card, and win the game because 10 points instead of 9
Island Name: Felinefine
I haven't been able to play in person for months now so this was nice.
You know, after Cog gets a shot at a full game.
Hey that was our half ass game you jerk!
Also reserve me please. I'm on mobile and can't figure out the color tag using the UI so if that code is wrong I'll fix it at home