Munkus BeaverYou don't have to attend every argument you are invited to.Philosophy: Stoicism. Politics: Democratic SocialistRegistered User, ClubPAregular
The Pillagers of Mammon - 50% to recover any artifacts or relics in battle (8/*/3/3/3) Attachments: None
The Harem of Asmodeus - 50% Chance to gain half the HP of a legion you defeat in battle permanently (8/*/3/4/3) Attachments: None
The Gorgons - Melee Last (8/6/6/0/4)
The Horde of Leviathan - 50% chance to swap your lowest stat with a legion or place of power you battle (As long as it's higher) (8/*/4/3/3) Attachments: None
The Swarm of Beelzebub - +1 Movement, Lose 2 HP each round not in combat (This can be negated by garrisoning at a place of power) (6 of 8/*/3/3/3) Attachments: None
The Army of Satan - Combat goes an extra round (8/*/3/3/3) Attachments: None
The Nightmares of Belphegor - -1 Movement, Regain Double HP when garrisoned (8/*/3/3/3) Attachments: None
The Trees of Woe - Grasping Roots: May heal without a place of power if they do not move (11/3/1/6/3)
Envy is the regent and will receive an event card this turn. Play will proceed down the list from them.
The Infernal Bazaar
Asmodeus has won the auction for the Legion known as the Gorgons
Bephegor has won the auction for the Legion known as the Trees of Woe
Legions
The Sons of Set - Fierce: +1d3 Melee damage when causing Melee damage (10/4/4/5/1) Bid: 3 Souls 4 Ichor 0 Darkness 0 Hellfire
The Grand Order of Cenobites - Reverse Engineer: 25% chance to recover artifacts or relics in Battle (6/8/4/3/3) Bid: 4 Souls 4 Ichor 0 Darkness 0 Hellfire
The Devoted of Lucifer - Hoist the Colors: +3 to stats if the house’s Archdemon is of the House of Lucifer (11/3/4/4/4) Bid: 5 Souls 4 Ichor 2 Darkness 2 Hellfire
The Lethean Phalanx - Draught of Forgetfulness: Units this legion fight cannot use their special abilities during combat. (8/6/5/4/1) Bid: 5 Souls 3 Ichor 0 Darkness 0 Hellfire
Death's Great Scythe - +3 Melee, Damage caused by a legion equipped with this artifact gives the Archdemon an equal amount of Souls. Bid: 8 Souls 0 Ichor 0 Darkness 8 Hellfire
Ichor Vats - Healing of the Legion holding this artifact is Doubled. Bid: 5 Souls 3 Ichor 0 Darkness 4 Hellfire
Throne of Skulls - Triple Champion’s Bonus when marching with the Legion Bid: 6 Souls 0 Ichor 0 Darkness 8 Hellfire
The Infernal Machine - +5 Infernal, Damage caused by a legion equipped with this artifact gives the Archdemon an equal amount of Hellfire Bid: 8 Souls 0 Ichor 0 Darkness 12 Hellfire
Finger of Betrayal - Allows Archdemon free action to root out traitors. -3 prestige each turn so long as the traitor is unexposed, +3 prestige if the traitor is found Bid: 8 Souls 0 Ichor 9 Darkness 0 Hellfire
Talisman of Greed - Double the amount of resources gained every turn Bid: 10 Souls 0 Ichor 10 Darkness 0 Hellfire
Book of Enoch - Reduce Infernal Might Backlash by 1 during each round of Champion Combat, Prestige +2 Bid: 7 Souls 0 Ichor 5 Darkness 0 Hellfire
Ongoing Events
Mammon has insulted Belphegor before the Infernal Conclave! The House of Sloth must decide whether to accept the insult or refute it and claim the Right of Vendetta.
Mammon has brought a demand of Leviathan before the Infernal Conclave! The House of Envy must decide whether to capitulate to the demand of 1 resource or refuse it and be subject to the Right of Vendetta.
Beelzebub has insulted Belphegor before the Infernal Conclave! The House of Sloth must decide whether to accept the insult or refute it and claim the Right of Vendetta.
Asmodeus has brought a demand of Beelzebub before the Infernal Conclave! The House of Gluttony must decide whether to capitulate to the demand of 1 resource or refuse it and be subject to the Right of Vendetta.
Fuck you, Belphegor! You're a fuck and you're covered in fuck! You leave a fuck-trail everywhere you go! The savvy investor buys into fuck and fuck-related industries any time you come to town! Some might say that the degree to which you are a fuck is intolerable and I would be inclined to agree with them! Oooh, the fucks on this guy!
The House of Mammon has issued a decree honoring our most loyal and prestigious customers, The Greater Houses of Hell.
It is our pleasure to continue to be the traditional supplier of "Soul De la Fuckboy", for the great Asmodeus - The illustrious House of Lust.
The Emissary, Virgil, offers respect to a fellow house of desire- a house of ambition!
Long Live Archdemon Dongs Galore, may we always do business...
It is desire that bind us as worthy practitioners of our infernal responsibilities.
No one understands that better than our precious customer, Leviathan - The glorious House of Envy.
We are proud to have provided avenues in the procurement of what is known as the greatest collections in history under the Archdemon Auralynx.
This Humble emissary Virgil, offers respect to a fellow house of desire- a house of ambition!
Long Live the House of Envy, may we always do business...
We of the Greater Houses hunger for more. More Power. More Respect. More Fear.
Our Ambition goes beyond the petty squabbling for souls, as practiced by the lesser hellclans.
No House displays more of this drive than Satan - the Fierce House of Wrath.
No enemy survives their attention, just as no vulgar insult brought before them goes unheeded.
The Murderbot's reign of violence is legendary throughout the planes.
We are pleased with our meager part in providing arms to the Deadly Archdemon Rainfall's glorious legion!
This poet king, Virgil, offers offers respect to a fellow house of desire- a house of ambition!
Long Live Archdemon Rainfall, may we always do business...
Last of the Great Houses of Hell, is the House of hunger and drive, Beelzebub - The House of Gluttony.
Provider of the great cycle of profit, we cannot forget to pledge joy to this unstoppable House.
As we collect souls from dealings throughout hell, it is in this incredible house that we trade for rarities.
Archdemon Lucedes in turn, engorges souls from throughout the realm- delicacies that grow their girthy power.
The Man Who Sought More Than his Lot In Limbo, Virgil, offers respect to a fellow house of desire- a house of ambition!
Long Live Archdemon Lucedes, may we always do business...
I will not speak of the LOITER-SACKS, or any of the lesser clans without AMBITION.
They may rot in bed, the idling, lazy good-for-nothings, as we achieve glory in the Arena and beyond.
We give our honors to our grandest customers, and certainly not the MUMBLECRUST toothless beggers,
who hope infamy will fall at their feet.
Without the Ambition of the Great Houses, demonkind is but a rebellion of indecisive, time-wasting ditherers.
Long Live the Great Houses, may we always do business...
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Donovan PuppyfuckerA dagger in the dark isworth a thousand swords in the morningRegistered Userregular
Asmodeus has brought a demand of Beelzebub before the Infernal Conclave! The House of Envy must decide whether to capitulate to the demand of 1 resource or refuse it and be subject to the Right of Vendetta.
This is supposed to be the house of gluttony, right?
Gonna be traveling tomorrow in the afternoon - evening.
Leaving work a few hours early to drive about 5 hours,
out to IL to help a brother out with moving.
He's going from a small apartment to a nice house. Gonna be there this weekend.
Should be exciting!
If you can't contact me, feel free to contact Discrider, Baidol, or INANTP.
I'm gonna try and stay connected though.
Can't stay up forever, hoarding all of Pride's mistakes in order to take cheap shots.
Probably best to talk to Baidol if you want to trade.
Night.
38thDoelets never be stupid againwait lets always be stupid foreverRegistered Userregular
edited February 2018
And now, time for the news! Looks like an exciting day in hell folks, we've got quite a bit of insults and demands coming from Lust Greed and Gluttony, but none of the blood the folks at home want to see. Additionally, it looks like some powerful legions were recruited. This reporter was able to get some interviews with Sloth, let's see what they are saying.
First up we have the Vizier of Sloth, can you tell us what inspired you to purchase the Trees of Woe?
I like Flowers!
I see. Any thoughts on your long term strategy?
You may say I'm a fool
Feeling the way that I do
I believe in friends and laughter
And the wonders love can do
I believe in songs and magic
And that's why I believe in you
Aaah, okay, lets never interview her again!
Hey!
We go now to the Archdemon of Sloth himself! We thank you for your time your highness, how are you doing today?
The Dude Abides.
How will you be responding to these threats?
I do mind, the Dude minds. This will not stand, ya know, this aggression will not stand, man.
I see, well we won't bother you any further, let's go now to the Champion of Sloth. Sir, will Sloth respond to this hostility?
What... a pain.
Can you expand on that for us?
What... a pain.
Next we go to the Emissary of Sloth
DEAAAAAAAAAAAAAL
Ooh, looks like he's hard at work. Well that's all I've got, anything to add Pleinair?
...
What? Yes those were the Lords of Sloth! What do you mean that's not what they look like? As if this reporter would take the time and effort to interview impostors just to boost the ratings!
...
Don't look at me like that! Remember if you'd like to be interviewed for the news tomorrow, please send me your story today. Pleinair put the axe down! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
EFFECTIVE IMMEDIATELY, INVICTUS IS NO LONGER IN THE GAME. WE WISH HIM ALL THE BEST. @WeedLordVegeta IS THE NEW VIZIER OF ENVY. PLEASE AFFORD THEM ALL THE CONVERSATION AND COURTESY YOU AFFORDED THEIR PREDECESSOR
"Go down, kick ass, and set yourselves up as gods, that's our Prime Directive!"
AuralynxDarkness is a perspectiveWatching the ego workRegistered Userregular
Okay, we have a new Vizier now who's just the best, really. The greatest Vizier. You guys are gonna be amazed; he's really something.
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Munkus BeaverYou don't have to attend every argument you are invited to.Philosophy: Stoicism. Politics: Democratic SocialistRegistered User, ClubPAregular
Easy fix: Relax the rules of the conclave so Viziers can tear everyone's throats out all the time.
Before we go global with this, maybe test it with a small subset. The House of Lust volunteers to be granted this power to make sure there's no unforseen concerns.
Easy fix: Relax the rules of the conclave so Viziers can tear everyone's throats out all the time.
I am sorry master, but we have shreds of decorum here. We are not the Palm Springs Homeowner’s Association.
"Go down, kick ass, and set yourselves up as gods, that's our Prime Directive!"
Hail Hydra
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Munkus BeaverYou don't have to attend every argument you are invited to.Philosophy: Stoicism. Politics: Democratic SocialistRegistered User, ClubPAregular
Posts
Also thank you for signing up, Reserves are heroes!
CALIBRATING JOY CHIP
Turn 2
Map of Hell
The following Legions are in play:
The Harem of Asmodeus - 50% Chance to gain half the HP of a legion you defeat in battle permanently (8/*/3/4/3) Attachments: None
The Gorgons - Melee Last (8/6/6/0/4)
The Horde of Leviathan - 50% chance to swap your lowest stat with a legion or place of power you battle (As long as it's higher) (8/*/4/3/3) Attachments: None
The Swarm of Beelzebub - +1 Movement, Lose 2 HP each round not in combat (This can be negated by garrisoning at a place of power) (6 of 8/*/3/3/3) Attachments: None
The Army of Satan - Combat goes an extra round (8/*/3/3/3) Attachments: None
The Nightmares of Belphegor - -1 Movement, Regain Double HP when garrisoned (8/*/3/3/3) Attachments: None
The Trees of Woe - Grasping Roots: May heal without a place of power if they do not move (11/3/1/6/3)
Envy is the regent and will receive an event card this turn. Play will proceed down the list from them.
The Infernal Bazaar
Asmodeus has won the auction for the Legion known as the Gorgons
Bephegor has won the auction for the Legion known as the Trees of Woe
Legions
The Sons of Set - Fierce: +1d3 Melee damage when causing Melee damage (10/4/4/5/1) Bid: 3 Souls 4 Ichor 0 Darkness 0 Hellfire
The Grand Order of Cenobites - Reverse Engineer: 25% chance to recover artifacts or relics in Battle (6/8/4/3/3) Bid: 4 Souls 4 Ichor 0 Darkness 0 Hellfire
The Devoted of Lucifer - Hoist the Colors: +3 to stats if the house’s Archdemon is of the House of Lucifer (11/3/4/4/4) Bid: 5 Souls 4 Ichor 2 Darkness 2 Hellfire
The Lethean Phalanx - Draught of Forgetfulness: Units this legion fight cannot use their special abilities during combat. (8/6/5/4/1) Bid: 5 Souls 3 Ichor 0 Darkness 0 Hellfire
Acheron's Butchers - Fresh Meat: Melee Damage permanently lowers opposing Legion’s HP (8/6/0/6/4) Bid: 5 Souls 3 Ichor 0 Darkness 0 Hellfire
Artifacts
Ichor Vats - Healing of the Legion holding this artifact is Doubled. Bid: 5 Souls 3 Ichor 0 Darkness 4 Hellfire
Throne of Skulls - Triple Champion’s Bonus when marching with the Legion Bid: 6 Souls 0 Ichor 0 Darkness 8 Hellfire
The Infernal Machine - +5 Infernal, Damage caused by a legion equipped with this artifact gives the Archdemon an equal amount of Hellfire Bid: 8 Souls 0 Ichor 0 Darkness 12 Hellfire
Relics
Finger of Betrayal - Allows Archdemon free action to root out traitors. -3 prestige each turn so long as the traitor is unexposed, +3 prestige if the traitor is found Bid: 8 Souls 0 Ichor 9 Darkness 0 Hellfire
Talisman of Greed - Double the amount of resources gained every turn Bid: 10 Souls 0 Ichor 10 Darkness 0 Hellfire
Book of Enoch - Reduce Infernal Might Backlash by 1 during each round of Champion Combat, Prestige +2 Bid: 7 Souls 0 Ichor 5 Darkness 0 Hellfire
Ongoing Events
Mammon has insulted Belphegor before the Infernal Conclave! The House of Sloth must decide whether to accept the insult or refute it and claim the Right of Vendetta.
Mammon has brought a demand of Leviathan before the Infernal Conclave! The House of Envy must decide whether to capitulate to the demand of 1 resource or refuse it and be subject to the Right of Vendetta.
Beelzebub has insulted Belphegor before the Infernal Conclave! The House of Sloth must decide whether to accept the insult or refute it and claim the Right of Vendetta.
Asmodeus has brought a demand of Beelzebub before the Infernal Conclave! The House of Gluttony must decide whether to capitulate to the demand of 1 resource or refuse it and be subject to the Right of Vendetta.
Prestige Totals
Greed - 10 (10)
Gluttony - 10 (10)
Wrath - 10
Envy - 10
Lust - 4 (10)
Sloth- 0 (10)
PMs are going out now, do not disappoint us, Emissaries. I want to see good insults in this Conclave.
Also what does the bracket numbers mean
~So sayeth the House of Gluttony~
The Emissary, Virgil, offers respect to a fellow house of desire- a house of ambition!
No one understands that better than our precious customer, Leviathan - The glorious House of Envy.
We are proud to have provided avenues in the procurement of what is known as the greatest collections in history under the Archdemon Auralynx.
This Humble emissary Virgil, offers respect to a fellow house of desire- a house of ambition!
We of the Greater Houses hunger for more. More Power. More Respect. More Fear.
Our Ambition goes beyond the petty squabbling for souls, as practiced by the lesser hellclans.
No enemy survives their attention, just as no vulgar insult brought before them goes unheeded.
The Murderbot's reign of violence is legendary throughout the planes.
We are pleased with our meager part in providing arms to the Deadly Archdemon Rainfall's glorious legion!
This poet king, Virgil, offers offers respect to a fellow house of desire- a house of ambition!
Provider of the great cycle of profit, we cannot forget to pledge joy to this unstoppable House.
As we collect souls from dealings throughout hell, it is in this incredible house that we trade for rarities.
Archdemon Lucedes in turn, engorges souls from throughout the realm- delicacies that grow their girthy power.
The Man Who Sought More Than his Lot In Limbo, Virgil, offers respect to a fellow house of desire- a house of ambition!
I will not speak of the LOITER-SACKS, or any of the lesser clans without AMBITION.
They may rot in bed, the idling, lazy good-for-nothings, as we achieve glory in the Arena and beyond.
We give our honors to our grandest customers, and certainly not the MUMBLECRUST toothless beggers,
who hope infamy will fall at their feet.
Without the Ambition of the Great Houses, demonkind is but a rebellion of indecisive, time-wasting ditherers.
Long Live the Great Houses, may we always do business...
What is even the point of having a Hell at all if there's not gonna be some assplay involved? Damned amateurs!
This is supposed to be the house of gluttony, right?
If Envy wants it... give it to them?
Can't stay up forever, hoarding all of Pride's mistakes in order to take cheap shots.
Probably best to talk to Baidol if you want to trade.
Night.
Feeling the way that I do
I believe in friends and laughter
And the wonders love can do
I believe in songs and magic
And that's why I believe in you
would respond in a timely manner
to these insults...
But we fail to see
what makes those who have insulted us
worthy of any energy whatsoever
the house of Sloth does not
expend energy
unnecessarily
or on the insignificant
oh wait
As the Archdemon of Sloth I take these insult very
ohh an onion ring!
Is his name Jafar?
Before we go global with this, maybe test it with a small subset. The House of Lust volunteers to be granted this power to make sure there's no unforseen concerns.
I am sorry master, but we have shreds of decorum here. We are not the Palm Springs Homeowner’s Association.
We are, in the sense that they would be entirely contained in a diagram showing whose purview they fall under once they arrive here.