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I Really Hope the [Kids] are alright

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Posts

  • Satanic JesusSatanic Jesus Hi, I'm Liam! Registered User regular
    Peen wrote: »
    Whelp, made it to 10 2/3 before daughter number one got her first period. Our efforts to inform and normalize body stuff seem to have worked for now, she's taken it in stride and seems to be in good spirits (and the ice cream sundaes probably don't hurt), but I don't know how much fuss to make. I want to acknowledge that it's a big deal without making it weird, any advice from other period having folks would be greatly appreciated.

    When I got mine at 11 (in 1993 in Ireland), we didn't have proper sex ed. So I wake up one day, toss my covers back, and there's blood everywhere. I panic and try hiding it. I almost got away with it, except my sister found my bloody underwear. So she drags me to the living room where the rest of our family is, holds up my undies, and happily announces that I got my period. Our dad then starts clapping and says that I'm now a woman. I really wasn't happy at all.

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  • AldoAldo Hippo Hooray Registered User regular
    Jesus. That fucking sucks. That want even that long ago. D:

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  • BrodyBrody The Watch The First ShoreRegistered User regular
    It's been years since I really had to deal with my asthma, so I often forget it's a thing, but spending 5 minutes trying to run from a bunch of kids did a real good job reminding me.

    "I will write your name in the ruin of them. I will paint you across history in the color of their blood."

    The Monster Baru Cormorant - Seth Dickinson

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  • PerrsunPerrsun Registered User regular
    Netflix has this (new?) show Ridley Jones. We haven’t watched it yet, but the boy loves to watch the opening theme.

    There is something weird going on in this theme vocally. The singer seems to sing the name using a different intonation or vocalization Every Single Time.

    You’ve got extra syllables sometimes, coupled with super-quick-words other times.

  • BrodyBrody The Watch The First ShoreRegistered User regular
    Perrsun wrote: »
    Netflix has this (new?) show Ridley Jones. We haven’t watched it yet, but the boy loves to watch the opening theme.

    There is something weird going on in this theme vocally. The singer seems to sing the name using a different intonation or vocalization Every Single Time.

    You’ve got extra syllables sometimes, coupled with super-quick-words other times.

    Probably an attempt to make it feel less like the whole theme is just them repeating the name 15 times in the song.

    "I will write your name in the ruin of them. I will paint you across history in the color of their blood."

    The Monster Baru Cormorant - Seth Dickinson

    Steam: Korvalain
    KalnaurPerrsunAldo
  • KalnaurKalnaur I See Rain . . . Centralia, WARegistered User regular
    Perrsun wrote: »
    Netflix has this (new?) show Ridley Jones. We haven’t watched it yet, but the boy loves to watch the opening theme.

    There is something weird going on in this theme vocally. The singer seems to sing the name using a different intonation or vocalization Every Single Time.

    You’ve got extra syllables sometimes, coupled with super-quick-words other times.

    Why does this make me think of this Carmen Sandiego song?

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  • SharpyVIISharpyVII Registered User regular
    edited July 26
    Our son has slept really well this past week.

    However I'm now working evenings followed by nights for the next few days.

    He just doesn't seem to sleep well at all when I'm at work.

    He's way more whiny and cries alot whenever it's just my wife home at night.

    He has the same routine regardless of who puts him to bed.

    Any suggestions? My wife is exhausted.

    SharpyVII on
  • m!ttensm!ttens Registered User regular
    How much does the routine change when it's just your wife? It could be with two of you he is getting plenty of stimulation and activity but it's hard to keep that up as a single parent and then have to deal with getting them to bed.

    Elvenshae
  • AldoAldo Hippo Hooray Registered User regular
    My kid loves Ridley Jones at the moment. All the songs in the episodes are also of the level of Glee and in the dubbed version they're even more cringe. Themes and educational value are ok, I appreciate that main character is an impatient athletic young girl who lives in a museum with her mom and her grandma. The best thing is that the whole show is one big reference to Indiana Jones.

    Elvenshae
  • SharpyVIISharpyVII Registered User regular
    m!ttens wrote: »
    How much does the routine change when it's just your wife? It could be with two of you he is getting plenty of stimulation and activity but it's hard to keep that up as a single parent and then have to deal with getting them to bed.

    It's more or less the same. He was at nursery yesterday afternoon so had plenty of fun.

    Tonight has been the complete opposite. Nursery in the afternoon as I'm at work, wife has put him to bed and he's slept through.

    There is nothing different between yesterday and today yet he's slept so much better.

    So who knows!

  • KalnaurKalnaur I See Rain . . . Centralia, WARegistered User regular
    SharpyVII wrote: »
    Our son has slept really well this past week.

    However I'm now working evenings followed by nights for the next few days.

    He just doesn't seem to sleep well at all when I'm at work.

    He's way more whiny and cries alot whenever it's just my wife home at night.

    He has the same routine regardless of who puts him to bed.

    Any suggestions? My wife is exhausted.

    He has the same routine but doesn't sleep as well for your wife? I'm just making sure I'm reading that right.

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  • SharpyVIISharpyVII Registered User regular
    edited July 27
    Kalnaur wrote: »
    SharpyVII wrote: »
    Our son has slept really well this past week.

    However I'm now working evenings followed by nights for the next few days.

    He just doesn't seem to sleep well at all when I'm at work.

    He's way more whiny and cries alot whenever it's just my wife home at night.

    He has the same routine regardless of who puts him to bed.

    Any suggestions? My wife is exhausted.

    He has the same routine but doesn't sleep as well for your wife? I'm just making sure I'm reading that right.

    He is worse for my wife when she's on her own more often than not. But these last two days have been polar opposites despite everything being the same including me not being there.

    When he does wake he shouts for my wife so I wonder if he's got some separation anxiety with her.

    Just wish I knew why he's slept so well tonight, can't think of anything that would make a difference!

    SharpyVII on
  • AldoAldo Hippo Hooray Registered User regular
    Perhaps the only difference is that the kid was more tired than yesterday night?

    --

    I'm wracking my brain with what I'm going to do for Little King's 5th birthday party. We know who he wants to invite, don't know if they can make it. We live in an apartment, so we can't have them running around the place too much. We don't have a garden or shared outdoor space for parties, so we need to go somewhere. It will be in August, so there is a good chance that the weather is going to be nice and we can go to a public park. The nearest ones are rather small, so we would need to move slightly further afield. That means it'll be difficult as there are no public restrooms anywhere.

    It'll be mostly me running the show, so I don't want to go to an indoor playground, as that's a logistical and emotional nightmare with six 4-5 year olds with very different energy levels.

    My preliminary plan so far is for them to start in our apartment, then go outside for a scavenger hunt ending with whacking a pinata and playing in a public playground. Then head back to the apartment for pancakes and decorating tote bags or some other creative activity.

    This is all playing right into my brain spiders.

  • lonelyahavalonelyahava Call me Ahava ~~She/Her~~ Move to New ZealandRegistered User regular
    Keep it simple.

    Take them to the park, let them run around like children. You don't even need to do the tote bags or anything else like that.

    They're 5. They literally will not care about that bag the instant they get home, at which point is just another thing that another parent is stepping over and tripping on in the night.

    Ellie's birthday is in Feb, which is basically the same weather as your August

    We took the kids outside with buckets of water and sponges and had them a water fight. Then we gave them cake, pizza, sushi. And then let them just run around in our yard/park.

    AldoDisruptedCapitalistkimeElvenshaeMNC DoverPeenShadowfireschuss
  • AldoAldo Hippo Hooray Registered User regular
    Thanks, yeah, my partner just told me as well that anything creative is just wasted effort.

    MNC DoverKalnaur
  • Blake TBlake T Registered User regular
    I think a scavenger hunt sounds like a good idea!

  • Mojo_JojoMojo_Jojo We are only now beginning to understand the full power and ramifications of sexual intercourse Registered User regular
    Nending has a new thing she does where she screams for two hours when put to bed at night. She is completely inconsolable during this period and eventually she just stops and sleeps.

    It's been three days of this and I'm exhausted. It was so loud yesterday that a neighbor came round to check everything was alright.

    Homogeneous distribution of your varieties of amuse-gueule
  • lonelyahavalonelyahava Call me Ahava ~~She/Her~~ Move to New ZealandRegistered User regular
    Aldo wrote: »
    Thanks, yeah, my partner just told me as well that anything creative is just wasted effort.

    The scavenger hunt is good! And it's not so much as it's wasted, but better saved for next year when they might care a bit more.


    I did some finger painting canvas things for Ellie's first and second birthdays, and nobody even took them home.

    But next year it might be worth trying again. Providing I want to clean it up after.

    You can be creative without making yourself crazy, or going too big.

    Want to make pancakes? Set up a topping table for the kids to do their own. Or do a pizza making party or something like that. They'll remember the party, but you won't need to tidy up more than you would have normally, and the other parents might not hate you for setting the bar too high (yes this is a thing I worry about).

    AldoElvenshae
  • AldoAldo Hippo Hooray Registered User regular
    Oh yeah, Little King's bestie had a bouncy castle in her garden for her 4th birthday. It was in part a compensation for all the parties they missed all throughout Covid, but still. A bit much, eh.

  • MuzzmuzzMuzzmuzz Registered User regular
    So, today I'm taking the training wheels off the bike... any tips? I'm watching guides, and trying to wrack my brain about how I was taught.

  • AldoAldo Hippo Hooray Registered User regular
    Muzzmuzz wrote: »
    So, today I'm taking the training wheels off the bike... any tips? I'm watching guides, and trying to wrack my brain about how I was taught.

    Soft surface, helmet, saddle low enough for them to put a foot on the ground.

    Balancing your bike is all about speed, so make sure there's enough space for them to accelerate a bit.

    Uh besides that, practice practice practice.

  • ElvenshaeElvenshae Registered User regular
    Muzzmuzz wrote: »
    So, today I'm taking the training wheels off the bike... any tips? I'm watching guides, and trying to wrack my brain about how I was taught.
    We ended up sending my oldest to a class taught by REI, and they got him riding his bike in an afternoon after several weeks of no actual progress.

    They started by lowering the seat (as above) and taking off the pedals. Then, they worked on pushing with your feet. After they got that done, then they did “push 3 times, big, then pick your feet up and coast.” Then that again, but push once more in the middle. Then do it with some turns.

    Only after all of that - which was more than half the class? - did they put the pedals back on. At that point, instead of just picking their feat up after the first three pushes, they’d pick them up and put them on the pedals and go.

    Class was taught in a parking lot, so it was nice and flat and they had enough room to go for a bit without running into things.

    It was pretty amazing. We used the same method on my youngest (without the class, because of COVID) and it took him only a couple of days of “light trying” to go from training wheels to bike rider.

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  • DaMoonRulzDaMoonRulz Mare ImbriumRegistered User regular


    Is there an advice book on how to raise an Actor?

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  • Captain InertiaCaptain Inertia Registered User regular
    My kid loudly announces to everyone when I fart

    How long does this phase last

    ElvenshaeBrody
  • GnizmoGnizmo Registered User regular
    My son just told me about a drawing idea he had. He was going to draw a normal town but make it look frozen in time. Requests for clarification for what that means was met with snarky retorts of everyone just not getting it. This is not how I expected to learn he is smoking weed, but I can't think of another explanation for this spotaneous occurance of pure stoner logic.

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  • RanlinRanlin Oh gosh Registered User regular
    edited July 29
    Muzzmuzz wrote: »
    So, today I'm taking the training wheels off the bike... any tips? I'm watching guides, and trying to wrack my brain about how I was taught.

    You could consider also temporarily removing the pedals and making it into a balance bike. Once they get the balance part down without constantly kicking the pedals, put 'em back on and it'll be an even simpler transition.

    edit: Wow, I somehow completely missed Elvenshae already saying that, hah

    Ranlin on
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  • PeenPeen tw1tch0rz occasionallyRegistered User regular
    My kid loudly announces to everyone when I fart

    How long does this phase last

    Near as I can tell, never.

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  • DaMoonRulzDaMoonRulz Mare ImbriumRegistered User regular
    My kid loudly announces to everyone when I fart

    How long does this phase last

    Until you loudly announce it yourself

    3basnids3lf9.jpg




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  • #pipe#pipe Cocky Stride, Musky odours Pope of Chili TownRegistered User regular
    Hey parenting thread! Long time no post!

    I'm hoping for a little encouragement about our Bean's development, as we're a little worried about various kinds of progress. He seems to have kind of just stopped, developmentally, some time ago and it's starting to freak us out.
    • He's 3.5 (birthday in Feb)
    • His language basically hasn't progressed in maybe 6 months or more? He has never once used an "I" statement. He doesn't know how to respond to questions like "what's you name" or "how old are you?", when asked he literally just screams at you. The only sentences he uses are quoted or adapted from TV. He doesn't know how to answer in the affirmative, when asking for things he just points and says "That one" and we have to guess.
    • He is absolutely not interested in interacting with other adults in any capacity. We went to our family doctor the other day and when we were in the doctor's office by ourselves he whined in fear the entire time, and when the doctor was in there with us he cried and screamed and recoiled whenever the doctor did anything directed toward him. He also 100% refuses to talk to his relatives on video chat and screams when we point the camera at him, and any situation where he is forced to interact with another adult, like getting a haircut, is a full blown panic attack fear response of inconsolable screaming and begging to leave.
    • His potty training seems to be going super duper slowly, my wife has been working with him on it everyday for probably 4 months and he's made little progress, and also public bathrooms cause those same panic attack fear responses.

    We've wanted to take him to a pediatrician for a while now but we lost our family doctor and needed to find a new one before we could be referred. It's also worth noting that he's had essentially zero in-person interaction with anyone other than me and his mum since Covid started a few weeks after his second birthday, and it really does seem like he just hasn't had any cognitive or social development in that entire time, but the thing with the hair cuts and the public bathrooms was around before then too.

    He's starting preschool in September and we're both super worried. I see it going one of two ways - he's going to be shoved into a social situation where his mum and dad aren't around for him to fall back on and he'll just get on with it and progress, or he'll have a complete melt-down and not know how to interact with anyone and they'll send him home.

  • kimekime Queen of Blades Registered User regular
    #pipe wrote: »
    Hey parenting thread! Long time no post!

    I'm hoping for a little encouragement about our Bean's development, as we're a little worried about various kinds of progress. He seems to have kind of just stopped, developmentally, some time ago and it's starting to freak us out.
    • He's 3.5 (birthday in Feb)
    • His language basically hasn't progressed in maybe 6 months or more? He has never once used an "I" statement. He doesn't know how to respond to questions like "what's you name" or "how old are you?", when asked he literally just screams at you. The only sentences he uses are quoted or adapted from TV. He doesn't know how to answer in the affirmative, when asking for things he just points and says "That one" and we have to guess.
    • He is absolutely not interested in interacting with other adults in any capacity. We went to our family doctor the other day and when we were in the doctor's office by ourselves he whined in fear the entire time, and when the doctor was in there with us he cried and screamed and recoiled whenever the doctor did anything directed toward him. He also 100% refuses to talk to his relatives on video chat and screams when we point the camera at him, and any situation where he is forced to interact with another adult, like getting a haircut, is a full blown panic attack fear response of inconsolable screaming and begging to leave.
    • His potty training seems to be going super duper slowly, my wife has been working with him on it everyday for probably 4 months and he's made little progress, and also public bathrooms cause those same panic attack fear responses.

    We've wanted to take him to a pediatrician for a while now but we lost our family doctor and needed to find a new one before we could be referred. It's also worth noting that he's had essentially zero in-person interaction with anyone other than me and his mum since Covid started a few weeks after his second birthday, and it really does seem like he just hasn't had any cognitive or social development in that entire time, but the thing with the hair cuts and the public bathrooms was around before then too.

    He's starting preschool in September and we're both super worried. I see it going one of two ways - he's going to be shoved into a social situation where his mum and dad aren't around for him to fall back on and he'll just get on with it and progress, or he'll have a complete melt-down and not know how to interact with anyone and they'll send him home.

    Preschool will probably help regardless, and I wouldn't worry about the potty training (unless it's required for the aforementioned preschool...). Some kids just aren't ready to be potty trained even by 3.5. I'd say keep up with giving him opportunities, but don't stress out about progress, he'll make it when he does.

    Are you able to schedule some get-togethers with other adults so he can get more experience with them? Even better if they have kids too. Outdoors and vaccinated and masked and honestly the chance of Covid is basically nil, imo. Maybe that would be all he needs :)

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  • CorvusCorvus . VancouverRegistered User regular
    So, my oldest was still in diapers at almost four but started training at that age and we had zero incidents. He wasn’t ready before then.

    :so_raven:
  • KalnaurKalnaur I See Rain . . . Centralia, WARegistered User regular
    edited July 29
    #pipe wrote: »
    Hey parenting thread! Long time no post!

    I'm hoping for a little encouragement about our Bean's development, as we're a little worried about various kinds of progress. He seems to have kind of just stopped, developmentally, some time ago and it's starting to freak us out.
    • He's 3.5 (birthday in Feb)
    • His language basically hasn't progressed in maybe 6 months or more? He has never once used an "I" statement. He doesn't know how to respond to questions like "what's you name" or "how old are you?", when asked he literally just screams at you. The only sentences he uses are quoted or adapted from TV. He doesn't know how to answer in the affirmative, when asking for things he just points and says "That one" and we have to guess.
    • He is absolutely not interested in interacting with other adults in any capacity. We went to our family doctor the other day and when we were in the doctor's office by ourselves he whined in fear the entire time, and when the doctor was in there with us he cried and screamed and recoiled whenever the doctor did anything directed toward him. He also 100% refuses to talk to his relatives on video chat and screams when we point the camera at him, and any situation where he is forced to interact with another adult, like getting a haircut, is a full blown panic attack fear response of inconsolable screaming and begging to leave.
    • His potty training seems to be going super duper slowly, my wife has been working with him on it everyday for probably 4 months and he's made little progress, and also public bathrooms cause those same panic attack fear responses.

    We've wanted to take him to a pediatrician for a while now but we lost our family doctor and needed to find a new one before we could be referred. It's also worth noting that he's had essentially zero in-person interaction with anyone other than me and his mum since Covid started a few weeks after his second birthday, and it really does seem like he just hasn't had any cognitive or social development in that entire time, but the thing with the hair cuts and the public bathrooms was around before then too.

    He's starting preschool in September and we're both super worried. I see it going one of two ways - he's going to be shoved into a social situation where his mum and dad aren't around for him to fall back on and he'll just get on with it and progress, or he'll have a complete melt-down and not know how to interact with anyone and they'll send him home.

    I am not a medical professional, so understand this comes from a parent not a medical perspective. Our kiddo did all these things, and we had him evaluated for autism, which yes, he is.

    Our kiddo is now 4, almost 5 (in October). He still uses one word answers most commonly if he speaks at all, he still uses a lot of "that one" type pointing requests, his first bouts of mimicry were around your kiddo's age and were from shows not people. He hated being around too many people, the toilet freaks him out and used to induce full on panicked crying. Once he'd been evaluated, we took him to a special class with kiddos like him, and he got better at being around people after about a month at that class. He's got an IEP for preschool, and we work with him throughout the day.

    He also loves music, understands everything I say (way too much, in fact) and he can already spell easily, and he can type words which is how when his show was talking about the Mariana Trench he went to the Chromebook and looked up the Mariana Trench. And then started clicking on videos about it and opened the Wikipedia page for it, and I just watched to see how far he'd get, and when I said that the Wiki page had a lot of words and I wasn't sure if he'd get it, he said "I det et."

    He's way smart, he learns from screens better than people, and he's hilarious and helpful. He can fully dress himself, knows how way too many things work, and is very independent if he can be. He just also happens to still not talk much, eats only pureed food, and still has issues with the bathroom.

    If you even think he might have developmental delays (and it sounds like some of it has been) having him evaluated sooner rather than later will help loads.

    Kalnaur on
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  • #pipe#pipe Cocky Stride, Musky odours Pope of Chili TownRegistered User regular
    kime wrote: »
    Are you able to schedule some get-togethers with other adults so he can get more experience with them? Even better if they have kids too.

    This is a real kick in the pants because no, not really. We don't really have any friends here who are into get-togethers, especially during covid. We've tried, it's like pulling teeth. My family is all overseas, my wife's family is weirdly standoffish right now which is a whole other layer of stress. I wish... I really do.

    And just in general, @Kalnaur thank you for your post, it almost made me cry. Your little guy sounds amazing and I've been so anxious about finding out if Bean is on the spectrum that it's nice to remember even if he is he'll be ok. Thank you.

    Kalnaur
  • kimekime Queen of Blades Registered User regular
    #pipe wrote: »
    kime wrote: »
    Are you able to schedule some get-togethers with other adults so he can get more experience with them? Even better if they have kids too.

    This is a real kick in the pants because no, not really. We don't really have any friends here who are into get-togethers, especially during covid. We've tried, it's like pulling teeth. My family is all overseas, my wife's family is weirdly standoffish right now which is a whole other layer of stress. I wish... I really do.

    And just in general, Kalnaur thank you for your post, it almost made me cry. Your little guy sounds amazing and I've been so anxious about finding out if Bean is on the spectrum that it's nice to remember even if he is he'll be ok. Thank you.

    Ugh, that sucks :( . I know pre-Covid there were a lot of things you could do with strangers with kids (story time at the library, etc). I'm not sure what still exists nowadays, but you can look if there's anything outside? Check for summer-camp type things that allow you to also be there (and don't look too intimidating), maybe?

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  • MulysaSemproniusMulysaSempronius but also susie nyRegistered User regular
    edited July 29
    Pipe, if you were in the states I'd suggest getting an early intervention evaluation. I'm sure Canada had something similar, but I couldn't say at all what the process is.
    My son has a hard time with impulse control, was a late talker, and has a very hard time playing with other kids/ interacting with other people. He's not diagnosed with anything ( trying to get a diagnosis seems to be very expensive or nearly impossible currently), but he was able to get evaluated by his school for services. We weren't sure if he needed the extra help, so even going through the process was helpful in seing what was expected at his age. I highly suggest, if you can, trying to set if there's a process to help. It could just be socialization is needed, and preschool could jump- start his process. But my son was able to get somebody who worked one-on-one with him, and it was amazing how he progressed.

    MulysaSempronius on
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    Kalnaur
  • #pipe#pipe Cocky Stride, Musky odours Pope of Chili TownRegistered User regular
    Yeah that's the plan. We're waiting on a referral to a new paediatrician, who we're going to ask about evaluation.

    Kalnaur
  • BrodyBrody The Watch The First ShoreRegistered User regular
    Sapling is 4 years old today!

    "I will write your name in the ruin of them. I will paint you across history in the color of their blood."

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  • CorvusCorvus . VancouverRegistered User regular
    #pipe wrote: »
    Yeah that's the plan. We're waiting on a referral to a new paediatrician, who we're going to ask about evaluation.

    Hey do I remember right that you’re in BC? I am and we have two families we’re friends with that have recently gone through the process of having kids diagnosed with either autism or ADHD or both, I don’t remember the specifics, but I can find out how the process works here.

    :so_raven:
  • #pipe#pipe Cocky Stride, Musky odours Pope of Chili TownRegistered User regular
    I am in BC, yes. Richmond, specifically. I would love any insight you can send!

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