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    Skull ManSkull Man RIP KUSU Registered User regular
    edited January 2008
    potatoe wrote: »
    i only read the memos addressed to "your admiral awesomeness of the stratospheric alliance of all things great and perfect"

    or just "potatoe" for short

    Skull Man on
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    TxdoHawkTxdoHawk Registered User regular
    edited January 2008
    I dated a girl from Wisconsin for about a year and a half. It was amazing, she was like a best friend and a girlfriend all rolled into one. One day, she just snaps, goes really cold, dumps me a week later, and starts immediately fucking this random dipshit who's about to go off to serve in the Army. (I found this out rather bluntly through her.) Oh, and here's the kicker, the guy had a wife at the time. She didn't even care.

    Years later, this random woman IM's me and...yup, it's his now ex-wife. Turns out he'd been running around, and while he still fucks around with my ex, he's got a laundry list of other women he leads around too. She had only just then found out all this stuff. I shrug, being long past it at this point, answer her questions and go back to my normal business. At the time though, it crushed the shit out of me.

    TxdoHawk on
    TuxedoHawk.png
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    potatoepotatoe Registered User regular
    edited January 2008
    pssh

    women

    who needs 'em?

    potatoe on
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    PonyPony Registered User regular
    edited January 2008
    i guess the closest thing to a stalker i had was a girl i met over the internets who lived in the next city and one day just showed up at my house unannounced with a bag of clothes and expected to spend a weekend of hot dickings with me because i had mentioned to her that it was pretty rad i had the whole house to myself that weekend

    she wasn't crazy like the melody chick that was stalking skull man

    she was just desperate and misunderstood shit

    so i guess i just don't have a good sense of how crazy a chick stalker could be

    Pony on
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    potatoepotatoe Registered User regular
    edited January 2008
    so, did you spend the weekend giving hot dickings?

    potatoe on
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    bowtiedsealbowtiedseal Registered User regular
    edited January 2008
    awkward people end up having crushes on me quite a lot, and then I let them down easy and they keep liking me and it starts to creep me out and I don't know how to deal because I can't be mean to people

    edit: ugh top of the page

    bowtiedseal on
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    PonyPony Registered User regular
    edited January 2008
    potatoe wrote: »
    so, did you spend the weekend giving hot dickings?

    no!

    her and i had a chat

    i made it clear that while she was a nice girl and all, i wasn't interested in her like that and she totally misread the situation

    she cried

    i hugged her, apologized if i had lead her on

    she went back to her town and never came on msn or logged onto the RPG we met over again

    Pony on
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    Metzger MeisterMetzger Meister It Gets Worse before it gets any better.Registered User regular
    edited January 2008
    Because she probably killed herself.

    Metzger Meister on
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    potatoepotatoe Registered User regular
    edited January 2008
    i had a terrible revelation today

    i realized that i ignored all of the advances of a gorgeous chick 3 years ago
    i mean, all of them
    she actually had the message carried to me through a third party that she wanted to fuck my brains out

    if i could travel back in time, i'd punch myself for being a nervous shitstain

    potatoe on
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    potatoepotatoe Registered User regular
    edited January 2008
    Pony wrote: »
    potatoe wrote: »
    so, did you spend the weekend giving hot dickings?

    no!

    her and i had a chat

    i made it clear that while she was a nice girl and all, i wasn't interested in her like that and she totally misread the situation

    she cried

    i hugged her, apologized if i had lead her on

    she went back to her town and never came on msn or logged onto the RPG we met over again

    well, at least she knows how to cut her losses and avoid future awkward situations
    i'll give her that

    potatoe on
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    ChicoBlueChicoBlue Registered User regular
    edited January 2008
    potatoe wrote: »
    i had a terrible revelation today

    i realized that i ignored all of the advances of a gorgeous chick 3 years ago
    i mean, all of them
    she actually had the message carried to me through a third party that she wanted to fuck my brains out

    if i could travel back in time, i'd punch myself for being a nervous shitstain

    Dude, she was a zombie.

    One of those Porn of the Dead zombies.

    ChicoBlue on
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    ButtersButters A glass of some milks Registered User regular
    edited January 2008
    TxdoHawk wrote: »
    I dated a girl from Wisconsin for about a year and a half. It was amazing, she was like a best friend and a girlfriend all rolled into one. One day, she just snaps, goes really cold, dumps me a week later, and starts immediately fucking this random dipshit who's about to go off to serve in the Army. (I found this out rather bluntly through her.) Oh, and here's the kicker, the guy had a wife at the time. She didn't even care.

    Years later, this random woman IM's me and...yup, it's his now ex-wife. Turns out he'd been running around, and while he still fucks around with my ex, he's got a laundry list of other women he leads around too. She had only just then found out all this stuff. I shrug, being long past it at this point, answer her questions and go back to my normal business. At the time though, it crushed the shit out of me.

    You should have fucked her.

    Butters on
    PSN: idontworkhere582 | CFN: idontworkhere | Steam: lordbutters | Amazon Wishlist
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    potatoepotatoe Registered User regular
    edited January 2008
    but, in her defense, i'd hunt you down for as well

    potatoe on
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    potatoepotatoe Registered User regular
    edited January 2008
    ChicoBlue wrote: »
    potatoe wrote: »
    i had a terrible revelation today

    i realized that i ignored all of the advances of a gorgeous chick 3 years ago
    i mean, all of them
    she actually had the message carried to me through a third party that she wanted to fuck my brains out

    if i could travel back in time, i'd punch myself for being a nervous shitstain

    Dude, she was a zombie.

    One of those Porn of the Dead zombies.

    i am going to ride this explanation into the sunset

    potatoe on
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    bowtiedsealbowtiedseal Registered User regular
    edited January 2008
    I think I may be dead inside

    I've never reciprocated anyone's feelings and I haven't been interested in anyone romantically since I was 16

    bowtiedseal on
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    potatoepotatoe Registered User regular
    edited January 2008
    I think I may be dead inside

    I've never reciprocated anyone's feelings and I haven't been interested in anyone romantically since I was 16

    i am alive enough for both of us

    if i take a view of myself from afar, i am what some may call "clingy"
    it's disgusting
    but i overtly love those who love me to some sort of crazy extreme

    potatoe on
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    ChicoBlueChicoBlue Registered User regular
    edited January 2008
    I think I may be dead inside

    I've never reciprocated anyone's feelings and I haven't been interested in anyone romantically since I was 16

    So...

    So when you said all those things to me after we...

    You didn't mean them?


    OH GOD.

    WHERE IS THE NEAREST BRIDGE?!

    ChicoBlue on
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    bowtiedsealbowtiedseal Registered User regular
    edited January 2008
    ChicoBlue wrote: »
    I think I may be dead inside

    I've never reciprocated anyone's feelings and I haven't been interested in anyone romantically since I was 16

    So...

    So when you said all those things to me after we...

    You didn't mean them?


    OH GOD.

    WHERE IS THE NEAREST BRIDGE?!

    I'm actually a little afraid that a spanish man 14 years my senior will turn up on my doorstep one of these days declaring his everlasting love and I'll have to call the police or something

    only tangentially related to bridge jumping. but I might have to jump off a bridge if that happens.

    bowtiedseal on
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    PonyPony Registered User regular
    edited January 2008
    Because she probably killed herself.

    i watched the papers because i suspected this but a teenage suicide or disappearance would've been big news in her town so i figure she was fine

    but i was curious about this because just two years before a girl i broke up with had actually attempted suicide after

    man that was a fucked up situation.

    dated a girl for a couple of months. she wouldn't put out, or even make out. she was in fact uncomfortable with overall physical closeness. basically we would sit around my house or hers playing videogames or watching tv. so it was basically like having a platonic friendship that we were acting was a real relationship.

    i wanted to break up with her, but when i'd make an attempt to approach the subject she'd somehow sense it was coming and tell me how much she cares about me and how much she hates her family and how i'm the only part of her life that makes sense etc.

    bitch was basically puttin' the hold on me as an anchor for her emotional issues. she didn't really want a boyfriend, she just wanted an exclusive friend. i started to resent her for it. but i didn't want to just dump her cold because i knew she'd take it bad and i was already getting the rep as an asshole for dumping chicks cold.

    so instead i cheated on her. terrible idea, i know, but there it is.

    that went on for a few weeks, but since her and the girls i had been porkin were in kinda the same social circle i knew eventually it was gonna come out and it'd be bad. the whole decision was stupid. so i decided to level with her, be the bad guy and be like "yeah, i'm sorry, i'm a sexhound and it's all my fault i'm a jerk"

    so i did that. she took it hard. bawled and bawled. still wanted to stay with me though! apologized for not putting out, even! offered some apology sex. i was just like, jesus christ girl, get help. i'm not the dude for you, and i can't be.

    she stopped coming to school for three days. just stayed home and was depressed. then she tried to slit her wrists. this was clearly the days before "down the street, not across the road" became a catchphrase, because she didn't die from it and her parents pulled her from school and she went into therapy and i didn't see her for over a year.

    then eventually she makes contact again, tells me she forgives me, that she's happier now and gets along with her family better, and oh yeah she's basically a lesbian and that was the core of her issues and that she was basically trying to pretend it wasn't the case and she was never really sexually attracted to me at all she just wanted to deny her own homosexuality and also she's moving to hamilton and she can't keep these kittens her cat had and would i like one.

    i still have that cat.

    her name is willow

    this is her:
    Willow01.jpg

    Pony on
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    potatoepotatoe Registered User regular
    edited January 2008
    i think i know too much about pony

    i knew that that was the willow story after the second sentence

    potatoe on
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    KilljoyKilljoy __BANNED USERS regular
    edited January 2008
    Same here.

    Like I could rattle off five pages of interesting shit he's said on here, and I've just been here a couple of months.

    Killjoy on
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    TxdoHawkTxdoHawk Registered User regular
    edited January 2008
    Wow Pony, that woman had some serious issues, but at least you got a kitty out of it.

    TxdoHawk on
    TuxedoHawk.png
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    Metzger MeisterMetzger Meister It Gets Worse before it gets any better.Registered User regular
    edited January 2008
    Sweet, crazy homophobe lesbian gave you a kitty. :^:


    Also, typically, women attempt suicide more than men, because typically attempted suicides aren't serious attempts at self-murder, but cries for help, consciously or uncosciously.


    If you want to kill yourself, you'll get it done.

    Metzger Meister on
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    PonyPony Registered User regular
    edited January 2008
    TxdoHawk wrote: »
    Wow Pony, that woman had some serious issues, but at least you got a kitty out of it.

    the thing is

    she seemed happier as a person

    basically she realized she was a lesbian when she was like 12

    and she hated it and herself

    and that self-hatred also turned into hating her parents in some way

    when she started dating me she was trying hard to convince herself that it was just a phase or whatever and she wanted to feel normal

    but she really wasn't sexually attracted to me or any other dude at all really and she was really uncomfortable with any attempt.

    once she came to grips with the core of her depression and issues she seemed like 100% a happier person

    so, good on that, i suppose

    Pony on
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    Draco_AuricDraco_Auric Registered User regular
    edited January 2008
    Compassionate and patient with others regardless of difficulty

    Really?

    Draco_Auric on
    brick2jv6.jpg
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    PonyPony Registered User regular
    edited January 2008
    Compassionate and patient with others regardless of difficulty

    Really?

    hahahahaha no

    that's pure bullshit

    but by golly, when i am on company payroll

    i can feign compassion well

    and my patience for stupid people is nigh-infinite

    i just remind myself of my money

    and i stop seeing them as people

    Pony on
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    potatoepotatoe Registered User regular
    edited January 2008
    pony once kissed my on the forehead

    i don't remember if he was drunk or not when that happened

    but it did happen

    potatoe on
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    PonyPony Registered User regular
    edited January 2008
    potatoe wrote: »
    pony once kissed my on the forehead

    i don't remember if he was drunk or not when that happened

    but it did happen

    drunk

    but i would've done it anyway

    i am an affectionate and cuddly person by nature

    i am hugs and forehead and cheek kisses

    ironic, considering

    you know

    Pony on
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    ChicoBlueChicoBlue Registered User regular
    edited January 2008
    I just had some toast.

    Like, toasted bread, you know?

    That was some good toast.

    ChicoBlue on
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    PonyPony Registered User regular
    edited January 2008
    potatoe

    by the way

    you are definitely invited to my 25th birthday party, which is going to be fucking huge

    see when i was a lad i was told i wouldn't live to see 25

    my plan is to burn the grim reaper in effigy

    Pony on
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    Metzger MeisterMetzger Meister It Gets Worse before it gets any better.Registered User regular
    edited January 2008
    Pony, after your 25th birthday are you gonna start doing irresponsibly dangerous things?

    Like fighting a shark with a knife?

    Metzger Meister on
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    As7As7 Registered User regular
    edited January 2008
    I got fired from being a janitor. It was a summer job. The justification was that they wanted to give the job to a friend who had worked there before but I was pretty bad at it, I knew it.

    As7 on
    XBOX Live: Arsenic7
    Secret Satan
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    potatoepotatoe Registered User regular
    edited January 2008
    Pony wrote: »
    potatoe

    by the way

    you are definitely invited to my 25th birthday party, which is going to be fucking huge

    see when i was a lad i was told i wouldn't live to see 25

    my plan is to burn the grim reaper in effigy

    god yes

    i promise to not get as drunk as last time so i don't hit on people as much

    or more drunk

    whichever is the better solution

    potatoe on
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    PonyPony Registered User regular
    edited January 2008
    Pony, after your 25th birthday are you gonna start doing irresponsibly dangerous things?

    Like fighting a shark with a knife?

    "I'M ON BORROWED TIME MOTHAFUCKA!!!"

    the answer to your question is no

    my brother pointed out to me it would be ironic that, when burning the reaper in effigy, i would accidentally inhale the smoke and my asthmatic lungs would fail and i would die from smoke inhalation

    headline would read

    "LOCAL MAN KILLED BY IRONY"

    live by the sword, die by it, i suppose

    Pony on
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    Charles KinboteCharles Kinbote Registered User regular
    edited January 2008
    Only if you're a swordsmith!

    Charles Kinbote on
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    stimtokolosstimtokolos Registered User regular
    edited January 2008
    Only if you're a swordsmith!

    I would totally do a blacksmithing course in a year off from study, except I'm not strong enough, or hairy enough, or large enough, or not wearing a shirt but wearing pants and an apron enough.

    stimtokolos on
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    Charles KinboteCharles Kinbote Registered User regular
    edited January 2008
    a friend of mine dropped out (?) of high school to move to new zealand and learn to be a blacksmith

    fucking lunatic but he's an awesome duder

    sadly he came to visit and can't go back because he dislocated his shoulder putting some guy's head through a window

    Charles Kinbote on
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    potatoepotatoe Registered User regular
    edited January 2008
    that is actually the best reason to drop out of highschool

    potatoe on
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    Draco_AuricDraco_Auric Registered User regular
    edited January 2008
    Pony wrote: »

    "I'M ON BORROWED TIME MOTHAFUCKA!!!"

    the answer to your question is no

    my brother pointed out to me it would be ironic that, when burning the reaper in effigy, i would accidentally inhale the smoke and my asthmatic lungs would fail and i would die from smoke inhalation

    headline would read

    "LOCAL MAN KILLED BY IRONY"

    live by the sword, die by it, i suppose



    I almost wish this would happen, but then where would we get our incredibly far fetched stories from?

    Draco_Auric on
    brick2jv6.jpg
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    stimtokolosstimtokolos Registered User regular
    edited January 2008
    a friend of mine dropped out (?) of high school to move to new zealand and learn to be a blacksmith

    fucking lunatic but he's an awesome duder

    sadly he came to visit and can't go back because he dislocated his shoulder putting some guy's head through a window

    So he is too hurt to be a blacksmith?
    He could totally put a guys head through a window here if he wanted.
    Plenty of stupid little kids who think they can mug people.
    It is pretty fucking funny, they hang out in the alleys near train stations, there are like 2 dodgy stations on my line where you could find them. Funny stuff.

    stimtokolos on
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