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My Appendix Was a Grendel!

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    nevilleneville The Worst Gay (Seriously. The Worst!)Registered User regular
    edited May 2008
    I visited him while he was in the hospital on Monday. Dude was a damn riot on morphine.

    your avatar is aces, my friend.

    neville on
    nevillexmassig1.png
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    ZombiemamboZombiemambo Registered User regular
    edited May 2008
    Nads wrote: »
    Useless ass organ, I say.

    It is a useless organ. I can't confirm it, but I've heard the appendix was at one time used to digest raw meat. Since we don't eat raw meat anymore (or we shouldn't anyways), you've basically got an explosive inside of you.

    Zombiemambo on
    JKKaAGp.png
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    FishmanFishman Put your goddamned hand in the goddamned Box of Pain. Registered User regular
    edited May 2008
    Nads wrote: »
    Useless ass organ, I say.

    It is a useless organ. I can't confirm it, but I've heard the appendix was at one time used to digest raw meat. Since we don't eat raw meat anymore (or we shouldn't anyways), you've basically got an explosive inside of you.

    Close, but wrong. The appendix is similar to a an organ found in the digestive system of herbivores, used to break down plant matter into digestible nutrients. However, nothing can be said for certain.

    The human gut is completely capable of breaking down meat into nutrients. There is, in fact, nothing wrong with properly prepared raw meat. See Steak Tartare, or Sushi. Even something as simple as a steak cooked blue (the step below rare) is pretty raw.

    Fishman on
    X-Com LP Thread I, II, III, IV, V
    That's unbelievably cool. Your new name is cool guy. Let's have sex.
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    Baroque And RollBaroque And Roll Every spark of friendship and love Will die without a homeRegistered User regular
    edited May 2008
    neville wrote: »
    I visited him while he was in the hospital on Monday. Dude was a damn riot on morphine.

    your avatar is aces, my friend.

    Thanks, good sir. I'm a big Godspeed fan.

    Baroque And Roll on
    2dtr87s.png
    SteamID: Baroque And Roll
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    ZombiemamboZombiemambo Registered User regular
    edited May 2008
    Fishman wrote: »
    Nads wrote: »
    Useless ass organ, I say.

    It is a useless organ. I can't confirm it, but I've heard the appendix was at one time used to digest raw meat. Since we don't eat raw meat anymore (or we shouldn't anyways), you've basically got an explosive inside of you.

    Close, but wrong. The appendix is similar to a an organ found in the digestive system of herbivores, used to break down plant matter into digestible nutrients. However, nothing can be said for certain.

    The human gut is completely capable of breaking down meat into nutrients. There is, in fact, nothing wrong with properly prepared raw meat. See Steak Tartare, or Sushi. Even something as simple as a steak cooked blue (the step below rare) is pretty raw.

    Sorry, not used to digest raw meat, but handle the bacteria in raw meat (you know, the kind that is taken directly from a fresh carcass). In either case I'm sure it's still incorrect. But whatever it did or does, it's getting smaller with each generation so we're not using it as much as we used to, if at all.

    Zombiemambo on
    JKKaAGp.png
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    Tweaked_Bat_Tweaked_Bat_ Registered User regular
    edited May 2008
    sarukun wrote: »
    Vann Diras wrote: »
    sarukun wrote: »
    If you say you got attacked by a deer, you sound like a faggot.
    b-but deer can be stronger than horses
    What about a unicorn?

    Tweaked_Bat_ on
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    JasconiusJasconius sword criminal mad onlineRegistered User regular
    edited May 2008
    I had appendicitis for 9 hours and it took 2 minutes to diagnose.

    You had it for months and then your appendix exploded and they never did the 5 second "does it hurt here" test?

    Exploded appendix is supposed to be pretty fatal.

    You know what is better than living 5 months with appendicitis?

    Living 3 days hooked up to a bag of opiate.

    Jasconius on
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    nevilleneville The Worst Gay (Seriously. The Worst!)Registered User regular
    edited May 2008
    long time no see, Jasc.
    sup.

    neville on
    nevillexmassig1.png
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    BYToadyBYToady Registered User regular
    edited May 2008
    I had an ingrown toenail that apparently had a staph infection for like, a year.

    Just never found time to go to the podiatrist. Its was nice getting that cut out.

    BYToady on
    Battletag BYToady#1454
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    JasconiusJasconius sword criminal mad onlineRegistered User regular
    edited May 2008
    neville wrote: »
    long time no see, Jasc.
    sup.

    heil.

    oh you know.

    working.

    in 4 months I will actually have time to play video games again.

    I don't think I remember what they are like anymore.

    I think they have buttons.

    That you can press.

    Jasconius on
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    nevilleneville The Worst Gay (Seriously. The Worst!)Registered User regular
    edited May 2008
    Jasconius wrote: »
    neville wrote: »
    long time no see, Jasc.
    sup.

    heil.

    oh you know.

    working.

    in 4 months I will actually have time to play video games again.

    I don't think I remember what they are like anymore.

    I think they have buttons.

    That you can press.

    Yeah, school + work has done that to me as well.
    It isn't as bad as the last month of school, but I'm sure my classes will begin thoroughly raping me again come September

    neville on
    nevillexmassig1.png
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    ArtreusArtreus I'm a wizard And that looks fucked upRegistered User regular
    edited May 2008
    BYToady wrote: »
    I had an ingrown toenail that apparently had a staph infection for like, a year.

    Just never found time to go to the podiatrist. Its was nice getting that cut out.

    I had three of those fuckers, minus the staph infection, and let me tell you. There was nothing nice about getting them cut out. ... Aside from the whole.. not having a toenail growing through my toe anymore.

    The hydrocodone did not hurt either. Although it wore off pretty quickly leaving me in paaaaaiin.

    Artreus on
    http://atlanticus.tumblr.com/ PSN: Atlanticus 3DS: 1590-4692-3954 Steam: Artreus
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    JasconiusJasconius sword criminal mad onlineRegistered User regular
    edited May 2008
    neville wrote: »
    Jasconius wrote: »
    neville wrote: »
    long time no see, Jasc.
    sup.

    heil.

    oh you know.

    working.

    in 4 months I will actually have time to play video games again.

    I don't think I remember what they are like anymore.

    I think they have buttons.

    That you can press.

    Yeah, school + work has done that to me as well.
    It isn't as bad as the last month of school, but I'm sure my classes will begin thoroughly raping me again come September

    I'm done in September, after a 3 month 4 class per week gauntlet run in addition to full time+

    It's going to be helllllll.

    Jasconius on
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    BYToadyBYToady Registered User regular
    edited May 2008
    Artreus wrote: »
    BYToady wrote: »
    I had an ingrown toenail that apparently had a staph infection for like, a year.

    Just never found time to go to the podiatrist. Its was nice getting that cut out.

    I had three of those fuckers, minus the staph infection, and let me tell you. There was nothing nice about getting them cut out. ... Aside from the whole.. not having a toenail growing through my toe anymore.

    The hydrocodone did not hurt either. Although it wore off pretty quickly leaving me in paaaaaiin.

    Oh, I've had to have both sides of both big toenails cut out because of my x-man like mutant powers of having retarded nails that just love growing DOWN instead of out. One of the 4 operations involved included a 3 week regimen of antibiotics to kill the infection so they could cut out the ingrown nail.

    Frankly, the pain during (turns out I've built a tolerance to novicane(sp) 3 injections and an hour later and I can STILL feel her poking at my toe) and after was less than anytime I bumped my toe for the year before I went in for the surgery.

    BYToady on
    Battletag BYToady#1454
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    WeaverWeaver Who are you? What do you want?Registered User regular
    edited May 2008
    I had no warning when my appendix failed. Just up & failed in the middle of the night, when I was 16, the Friday before finals week.

    Also, all hail wikipedia
    Although it was long accepted that the immune tissue, called gut associated lymphoid tissue, surrounding the appendix and elsewhere in the gut carries out a number of important functions, explanations were lacking for the distinctive shape of the appendix and its apparent lack of importance as judged by an absence of side-effects following appendectomy. [11] William Parker, Randy Bollinger, and colleagues at Duke University proposed that the appendix serves as a safe haven for useful bacteria when illness flushes those bacteria from the rest of the intestines.[12] [5] This proposal is based on a new understanding of how the immune system supports the growth of beneficial intestinal bacteria [13] [14], in combination with many well-known features of the appendix, including its architecture and its association with copious amounts of immune tissue. Such a function is expected to be useful in a culture lacking modern sanitation and healthcare practice, where diarrhea may be prevalent.[5] Current epidemiological data [15] show that diarrhea is one of the leading causes of death in developing countries, indicating that a role of the appendix as an aid in recovering beneficial bacteria following diarrhea may be extremely important in the absence of modern health and sanitation practices.[5]

    Weaver on
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    ZeroFillZeroFill Feeling much better. A nice, green leaf.Registered User regular
    edited May 2008
    well there you go

    ZeroFill on
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    AmbassadorAmbassador Registered User regular
    edited May 2008
    I had a friend die of this exact thing, back in school. It err yeah, exploded and the toxins killed him. Last I heard, his dad was sueing the motherfucking pants off of the doctors he consulted while his son was repeatedly sick. Sucky, sucky thing to happen man, glad you're ok.

    Ambassador on
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    Muse Among MenMuse Among Men Suburban Bunny Princess? Its time for a new shtick Registered User regular
    edited May 2008
    Van you are a true man of steel.

    Muse Among Men on
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    WeaverWeaver Who are you? What do you want?Registered User regular
    edited May 2008
    Luckily they got mine out before rupture, because it was failing fast. Failed in the middle of the night and I couldn't even stand the pain was so great. Kept vomiting all over the place and screaming. Couldn't eat or drink for three days after the operation until my digestive system kicked in again.

    Weaver on
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    WeaverWeaver Who are you? What do you want?Registered User regular
    edited May 2008
    I'ma go make pancakes now.

    Mmmmmmm pancakes for dinner

    Weaver on
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    OmegaTofuNinjaOmegaTofuNinja Registered User regular
    edited May 2008
    Vann Diras wrote: »
    Yeah my doctors were nothing but pleasant and took good care of me. Plus, it let me introduce myself as "The Medical Mystery" for awhile. That was fun.

    Fire Truck, that's terrible what happened to your sister. They originally hoped to just take mine out by scope, but once they got in and saw my appendix had like melded to my back, they had to open me up. Having staples in my stomach is weird and I do not enjoy it.

    Interestingly enough, his sister IS his girlfriend

    I know this for a fact.

    OmegaTofuNinja on
    Facebook Wii: 7912 0299 8667 6601 I tweet sometimes Poetry?!
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    JasconiusJasconius sword criminal mad onlineRegistered User regular
    edited May 2008
    Weaver wrote: »
    Luckily they got mine out before rupture, because it was failing fast. Failed in the middle of the night and I couldn't even stand the pain was so great. Kept vomiting all over the place and screaming. Couldn't eat or drink for three days after the operation until my digestive system kicked in again.

    Man I guess I was lucky, I never threw up, and after the first 5 or 6 hours I didn't even feel nauseous. My case was acute and it hurt like a motherfucker. My surgery was about 18 hours after I was first in pain.

    Fortunately between the intravenouses contrast injection I got during my CT scan (which feels probably like what the Matrix jack-in feels like except in your arm), and the painkillers I wasn't in agony for the last 8 or 9 of those 18 hours.

    But fuck not eating, I was chowing down 15 minutes after my discharge.

    Jasconius on
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    BYToadyBYToady Registered User regular
    edited May 2008
    Vann Diras wrote: »
    Yeah my doctors were nothing but pleasant and took good care of me. Plus, it let me introduce myself as "The Medical Mystery" for awhile. That was fun.

    Fire Truck, that's terrible what happened to your sister. They originally hoped to just take mine out by scope, but once they got in and saw my appendix had like melded to my back, they had to open me up. Having staples in my stomach is weird and I do not enjoy it.

    Interestingly enough, his sister IS his girlfriend

    I know this for a fact.

    If its on the internet, it must be true!

    BYToady on
    Battletag BYToady#1454
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    OmegaTofuNinjaOmegaTofuNinja Registered User regular
    edited May 2008
    BYToady wrote: »
    Vann Diras wrote: »
    Yeah my doctors were nothing but pleasant and took good care of me. Plus, it let me introduce myself as "The Medical Mystery" for awhile. That was fun.

    Fire Truck, that's terrible what happened to your sister. They originally hoped to just take mine out by scope, but once they got in and saw my appendix had like melded to my back, they had to open me up. Having staples in my stomach is weird and I do not enjoy it.

    Interestingly enough, his sister IS his girlfriend

    I know this for a fact.

    If its on the internet, it must be true!

    I know both Fire Truck and his girlfriend/sister in the real world life game TM

    OmegaTofuNinja on
    Facebook Wii: 7912 0299 8667 6601 I tweet sometimes Poetry?!
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    ArtreusArtreus I'm a wizard And that looks fucked upRegistered User regular
    edited May 2008
    God damnit tofu shut up. Basically it was Firetruck's girlfriend, not his sister that had the horrifying gall-sickness, I was there, I witnessed it, it sucked. Vann just got two different stories confused and thought it was Firetruck's sister that was sick.

    Tofu I am so mad at you right now, no lube.

    Artreus on
    http://atlanticus.tumblr.com/ PSN: Atlanticus 3DS: 1590-4692-3954 Steam: Artreus
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    OmegaTofuNinjaOmegaTofuNinja Registered User regular
    edited May 2008
    She's your sister too man, I don't know why you're mad at me. Be mad at your brother for banging your sister

    OmegaTofuNinja on
    Facebook Wii: 7912 0299 8667 6601 I tweet sometimes Poetry?!
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    ZeroFillZeroFill Feeling much better. A nice, green leaf.Registered User regular
    edited May 2008
    A solitary killer, the firetruck stalks its prey.

    ZeroFill on
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    SheriSheri Resident Fluffer My Living RoomRegistered User regular
    edited May 2008
    Incest threesome you say

    Sheri on
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    OmegaTofuNinjaOmegaTofuNinja Registered User regular
    edited May 2008
    I could've sworn that I raised them better

    I'm disappointed in you kids

    OmegaTofuNinja on
    Facebook Wii: 7912 0299 8667 6601 I tweet sometimes Poetry?!
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    ArtreusArtreus I'm a wizard And that looks fucked upRegistered User regular
    edited May 2008
    Well I am also banging tofu, so I guess it could be a foursome.

    edit: wait since when did you get to be the dad?

    Artreus on
    http://atlanticus.tumblr.com/ PSN: Atlanticus 3DS: 1590-4692-3954 Steam: Artreus
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    OmegaTofuNinjaOmegaTofuNinja Registered User regular
    edited May 2008
    awkwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaard

    OmegaTofuNinja on
    Facebook Wii: 7912 0299 8667 6601 I tweet sometimes Poetry?!
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    DichotomyDichotomy Registered User regular
    edited May 2008
    Dislexic wrote: »
    Davoid wrote: »
    Don't thank me, thank THE KNIFE

    This is correct.

    This should have gotten more attention

    Dichotomy on
    0BnD8l3.gif
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    Mr. Henry BemisMr. Henry Bemis God is love Registered User regular
    edited May 2008
    awkwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaard
    AWKWAAAAAAAAARD TUUUUUUUUUURTLE

    Mr. Henry Bemis on
    Nothing is true; Everything is permitted
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    ArtreusArtreus I'm a wizard And that looks fucked upRegistered User regular
    edited May 2008
    awkwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaard
    AWKWAAAAAAAAARD TUUUUUUUUUURTLE

    Oh man you should see Awkward turtle has a friend, but it is pretty hard to show somebody over the internet, so you will just have to imagine it.

    Artreus on
    http://atlanticus.tumblr.com/ PSN: Atlanticus 3DS: 1590-4692-3954 Steam: Artreus
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    Mr. Henry BemisMr. Henry Bemis God is love Registered User regular
    edited May 2008
    is that like two people do it and hook the thumbs

    that sounds awesome

    Mr. Henry Bemis on
    Nothing is true; Everything is permitted
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    BarcardiBarcardi All the Wizards Under A Rock: AfganistanRegistered User regular
    edited May 2008
    Vann Diras wrote: »
    So for like the past four or five months I've kept getting dreadfully sick. Doctors couldn't figure out why, nothing seemed to really work. It was like we needed Hugh Laurie to come save me or some shit but that wouldn't work because he's just an actor. A British actor.

    But thankfully, we found the problem! Sunday morning around 4 AM I began vomiting uncontrollably. So we go to the emergency room. After a day of dicking around, we find out that my appendix has exploded! No, not ruptured. When the appendix ruptures, it just like gets a hole in it an leaks all it's poisonous shit out. Mine blew up - there were pieces of appendix melded to my spine and all over my abdominal region. Fucker infected the entirety of my gallbladder, too!

    Oddly enough, this probably occurred something like two weeks ago. Two weeks! When someone's appendix ruptures, usually they die within like a few hours from the toxins. I lived 2 weeks, motherfucker! How's that feel?

    So after having my gallbladder removed as well as the remains of my badass exploding appendix, I'm pretty okay now.

    In all honesty I should be dead. But it's pretty cool that I'm not, right?

    how in the fuck are you still alive?

    Barcardi on
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    ArtreusArtreus I'm a wizard And that looks fucked upRegistered User regular
    edited May 2008
    is that like two people do it and hook the thumbs

    that sounds awesome

    uhhhh... more like you make the turtle with one hand and then use the other hand to hump the first turtle. The first turtle is not even on its back, so I guess the awkwardness just comes from the surprise buttsex.

    Artreus on
    http://atlanticus.tumblr.com/ PSN: Atlanticus 3DS: 1590-4692-3954 Steam: Artreus
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    sarukunsarukun RIESLING OCEANRegistered User regular
    edited May 2008
    sarukun wrote: »
    Vann Diras wrote: »
    sarukun wrote: »
    It doesn't really sound life threatening.

    I mean, if your heart exploded and you lived two weeks, yeah, that would be something.


    I mean, even if your liver or a kidney blew up, that would be something.


    But an appendix just sounds lame.

    Let's blow up your organ and let deadly toxins flow throughout your body and see how long you go.

    I'm not saying it's not deadly

    just that it doesn't sound particularly impressive.



    If you say you got attacked by a deer, you sound like a faggot.
    b-but deer can be stronger than horses

    That's exactly my Goddamned point

    YES, THEY CAN MURDER YOU BUT YOU STILL SOUND LIKE A FAGGOT IF YOU TELL PEOPLE.

    sarukun on
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    Mr. Henry BemisMr. Henry Bemis God is love Registered User regular
    edited May 2008
    sarukun wrote: »
    sarukun wrote: »
    Vann Diras wrote: »
    sarukun wrote: »
    It doesn't really sound life threatening.

    I mean, if your heart exploded and you lived two weeks, yeah, that would be something.


    I mean, even if your liver or a kidney blew up, that would be something.


    But an appendix just sounds lame.

    Let's blow up your organ and let deadly toxins flow throughout your body and see how long you go.

    I'm not saying it's not deadly

    just that it doesn't sound particularly impressive.



    If you say you got attacked by a deer, you sound like a faggot.
    b-but deer can be stronger than horses

    That's exactly my Goddamned point

    YES, THE CAN MURDER YOU BUT YOU STILL SOUND LIKE A FAGGOT IF YOU TELL PEOPLE.
    no you wouldn't you'd be lucky to be alive

    if someone told me they got attacked by a horse i'd be no way dude are you okay

    Mr. Henry Bemis on
    Nothing is true; Everything is permitted
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    sarukunsarukun RIESLING OCEANRegistered User regular
    edited May 2008
    no you wouldn't you'd be lucky to be alive
    I never said he wasn't lucky to be alive.


    Just that it didn't sound particularly impressive.

    sarukun on
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