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Stories of terrible teachers

Cold Salmon and HatredCold Salmon and Hatred __BANNED USERS regular
edited July 2008 in Social Entropy++
So uh my Physics teacher just basically cost me a $3000 scholarship.

We have these things called "exemptions" at my school for final exams. That is, you can exempt one exam and not have to take it. I decided to exempt Physics. So, I go talk to my Physics teacher and he's supposed to give me my absolute final mark. "98%" he says, and shows me a big list of marks which add up to this.

Now let me tell you about this scholarship. Basically if I have a 95% average of core subjects, I automatically get a $3000 scholarship. Throughout the year, I kept my marks up and had a bit over 95%. I figure with the Physics mark this high I'd have to fuck up pretty badly on my finals.

Anyway, today I go back for my final report cards, and when I get my physics mark I look down at the paper. 95%. What the fuck.

Turns out my asshole teacher forgot to mark a shitload of quizzes he was supposed to have marked weeks ago, and I hadn't done them apparently (although I know for a fact that I did do them and his stupid organizational system of just letting stuff lie all over his desk somehow failed him).

Nice of him to tell me about that when I went to get my final mark, like he was supposed to.

TL;DR- My Physics teacher just cost me a $3000 scholarship by being an inconsiderate douchebag.

So, what kind of stupid shit have you gone through with teachers?

Cold Salmon and Hatred on
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    noluitnoluit Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    I had an angry butch lesbian history teacher in high school once.

    It was not good times D:

    noluit on
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    the wookthe wook Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    one of the teachers i slept with to pass a class gave me herpes

    the wook on
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    JansonJanson Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    When I was 7/8 my teacher would give us a list of words once a week to learn for a spelling test. But they would invariably be spelled incorrectly. My mother would read over the list, make the corrections and then hand the list back to my teacher.

    I've been lucky to have absolutely awesome teachers otherwise.

    Janson on
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    Cold Salmon and HatredCold Salmon and Hatred __BANNED USERS regular
    edited June 2008
    Man I sound like a nerd in that post don't I

    but $3000 fuuuuckkk

    Cold Salmon and Hatred on
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    JansonJanson Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Koshian wrote: »
    how about cool teachers

    I've basically been given passing grades by three teachers because they like me
    This is so wrong. I guess the one good thing about UK schools is a) anonymous marking b) anonymous exam marking and c) exam marking by independent boards. If there is one thing I feel fairly assured about it is that all of my good grades were actually earned and were not doled out because the teacher liked me.

    Janson on
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    RialeRiale I'm a little slow Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Fuck college professors who either refuse to give out As because "No work is ever perfect" or who cannot keep your grade straight. That is all.

    Riale on
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    SporkAndrewSporkAndrew Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited June 2008
    I had a Physics teacher in Sixth form that came straight from being fired from a University. He would skip over really advanced stuff because "you should've learned this already" and spent ages walking us through the simple stuff that we had actually learned last year.

    There were times when he would write massive equations up on the board, all copied from notes, show his working and get the answer wrong. Then he'd argue with us when we called him on getting them wrong and say that we were in fact wrong.

    SporkAndrew on
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    Charles KinboteCharles Kinbote Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    i am pretty excited for my teachers this coming august

    Charles Kinbote on
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    ZoolanderZoolander Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Maybe you should've tried harder so you wouldn't lose the scholarship because of a 95

    Zoolander on
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    Cold Salmon and HatredCold Salmon and Hatred __BANNED USERS regular
    edited June 2008
    I have a history teacher somewhat like that Riale

    he's my favorite teacher because he marks really hard, never gives 100% on anything

    If I get a 95% on anything with him I feel really good because I know I did really well

    Cold Salmon and Hatred on
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    lostwordslostwords Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    A science teacher of mine from high school was arrested for child porn a few years back. The funny part was, no one suspected him and he was generally well-liked by most people. I mean, he was terrible in hind sight.

    lostwords on
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    CrackedLensCrackedLens Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    i had a real bitch of a teacher for homeroom for 4 years in highschool

    that was awesome

    awesome teachers though: Mrs Nash

    she was cool as can be. she let me be me while still not putting up with any of my shit

    CrackedLens on
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    thorgotthorgot there is special providence in the fall of a sparrowRegistered User regular
    edited June 2008
    i had this terrible french teacher in high school

    no wait, that was all of the french teachers in high school

    thorgot on
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    Charles KinboteCharles Kinbote Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    best teacher I've ever had

    Brother Alan in eighth grade english

    dude was a monk and was the single best human being i've ever met. he was kind and wonderful but still sarcastic and biting. he also knew so, so much, and basically got me into philosophy. every kid that has had him identifies him as their best teacher.

    Charles Kinbote on
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    JansonJanson Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    There were a couple of 5' nothing female English teachers at my high school.

    Scariest teachers ever. Oh, they definitely received respect. :D They could bellow like no one else.

    Janson on
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    HacksawHacksaw J. Duggan Esq. Wrestler at LawRegistered User regular
    edited June 2008
    I once had a Physical Science teacher who had no business teaching the class. The dude could barely teach, and most of his in-class exercises left me with more questions than answers regarding the subject material. He didn't even give us any assigned reading. 2 graded tests, one optional test. Didn't learn a fucking thing my entire time there.

    But I got an A- out of it, and it fulfilled one of the two science credits I needed for my AA, so I guess it turned out alright.

    Hacksaw on
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    CrackedLensCrackedLens Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Janson wrote: »
    There were a couple of 5' nothing female English teachers at my high school.

    Scariest teachers ever. Oh, they definitely received respect. :D They could bellow like no one else.

    there was this short little old 5th grade teacher in elementary

    when she would get upset she would take off her shoe and beat on the desk

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    MysstMysst King Monkey of Hedonism IslandRegistered User regular
    edited June 2008
    My math teacher in 8th failed me in Algebra 1/2 because we just didn't like each other.

    So I took Algebra 1/2 twice, started to hate math, and never went any farther than Pre-Calc.

    Mysst on
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    Airking850Airking850 Ottawa, ONRegistered User regular
    edited June 2008
    My high school had some damn good teachers, including one who A) won awards every year for his teaching, and B)looked exactly like Adam West

    Airking850 on
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    Cold Salmon and HatredCold Salmon and Hatred __BANNED USERS regular
    edited June 2008
    Yeah my physics teacher would give us notes, read them to us and that was it, then make us write open book tests. Wouldn't tell us when assignments were due or if we even had assignments

    I don't think I learned anything except that he has no business teaching anyone

    Cold Salmon and Hatred on
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    SporkAndrewSporkAndrew Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited June 2008
    Janson wrote: »
    There were a couple of 5' nothing female English teachers at my high school.

    Scariest teachers ever. Oh, they definitely received respect. :D They could bellow like no one else.

    I had an art teacher that was 5' nothing. She was the nicest person if you behaved and actually had some respect whilst in her classroom, but if anyone acted up she could make your ears bleed by shouting so loud.

    She was awesome.

    SporkAndrew on
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    JansonJanson Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Janson wrote: »
    There were a couple of 5' nothing female English teachers at my high school.

    Scariest teachers ever. Oh, they definitely received respect. :D They could bellow like no one else.

    I had an art teacher that was 5' nothing. She was the nicest person if you behaved and actually had some respect whilst in her classroom, but if anyone acted up she could make your ears bleed by shouting so loud.

    She was awesome.
    Yes! These teachers were lovely too, so long as you behaved, of course.

    Janson on
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    waggawaggawaggawagga Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    man when i was in the sixth grade, i had a teacher that did not let us go outside for recess.
    so one time i was playing go fish and she tells me "you can't play that, it's not educational"
    so i asked her how uno was educational (she let us play uno and would often join in on our games)
    she said it teaches us colors and numbers.
    Colors and numbers.
    In the sixth grade.

    waggawagga on
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    Me Too!Me Too! __BANNED USERS regular
    edited June 2008
    My English teacher let me make up an absolute shitton of back work so that I wouldn't fail and have to repeat senior year
    And I highly doubt that my final project deserved a 100
    Hell, one of the pages was the essay I wrote about being Batman

    Me Too! on
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    glithertglithert Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    There's this substitute teacher who will, in a very serious tone, tell you to cut the malarky.
    At least he's better than the fat woman who was abducted by aliens.

    glithert on
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    ZoolanderZoolander Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    I've never had a good teacher in all of engineering.

    Zoolander on
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    Charles KinboteCharles Kinbote Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    i had a 5' nothing art teacher my junior year, my first year at Explosion High

    she was fucking hilarious

    "Now if we get in a lockdown, there will be NO CELL PHONE USE. Why, you ask? You want to know why? Let's say you're huddled in your desk. And one room over, underneath a different desk, there is a bomb. A bomb hooked up to cell phone frequencies. You call your friend, you go "oh my god we're in a lockdown", guess what. That bomb? It goes off. Now I don't know if you little...well, I can't say that, but you kids are going to heaven, but let's say you get up there and you see your friends and family. And they're all saying "what's going on, how did we get here", and you have to stand up in front of them and say 'my bad, guys, I just HAD to call my little friend in math'. How would you like to be in that position?"

    The woman was from Roswell, too, so she had about the worst accent ever.

    Charles Kinbote on
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    DruhimDruhim Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited June 2008
    I remember the prof I had for a survey chemistry course
    dude was a big old blowhard that was very unforgiving of any minor mistake in a student's work even though we constantly caught mistakes that he made

    my favorite was when he went on a rant against environmentalists who complain about carbon emissions from petroleum fuels
    he made the point that humans give off more carbon dioxide globally than cars do, which is certainly true
    what he neglected to include is that carbon emissions from humans and other organisms are part of the natural carbon cycle where we're simply recycling carbon that's been stored in the short term in plant and animal tissue, but has not been sequestered in the ground
    whereas petroleum fuels are an issue precisely because it liberates massive amounts of carbon that were sequestered deep underground over millions and millions of years, thus upsetting the carbon balance significantly
    dude was a real piece of work

    Druhim on
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    Me Too!Me Too! __BANNED USERS regular
    edited June 2008
    My bio teacher was just batshit crazy. She was a vegan and a "cat lady"
    Her and her partner had something like 24 cats
    Twenty four cats
    That's as many as four sixes, and that's terrible

    Me Too! on
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    NarbusNarbus Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    One of my computer science teachers set a class aside for a review prior to the midterm. The session went something like this:

    us: "Could you go over red/black trees again?"
    her: "We already covered red/black trees two weeks ago, I'm not going to go over old information."
    us: "Um...ok, how about these two sort functions."
    her: "We covered this last month. Look, if you're not going to ask questions about things haven't already covered I'm going to start on new material."


    Another one of my teachers (numerical analysis) liked to set aside the last 10, 15 minutes of each class to write some huge problem on the board from his notes. Not actually discuss it and show us the principles underneath, but just scrawl it on the board as fast as he could. This meant the class would be so busy trying to write down the problem that at the end of class he could grab his stuff and dart out the door before any of us could stop him and ask him for help. He later got deported for trying to rape a grad student.

    The last teacher who really sticks out was, again, a computer science teacher. She tried very hard to convince us that the Vatican had performed a full head transplant on monkeys and how excited she was about this development and what it meant for medical research. Also she said that you could buy "smell cards" for your computer that would generate smells on the fly and this was also very exciting.

    Narbus on
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    Cold Salmon and HatredCold Salmon and Hatred __BANNED USERS regular
    edited June 2008
    My homeroom teacher in Grade 7 was the best ever

    we didn't get some projects from the start of the year ever

    he still hasn't marked them 5 years later

    and he'd tell us ghost stories during religion class

    Cold Salmon and Hatred on
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    Me Too!Me Too! __BANNED USERS regular
    edited June 2008
    Also my Java teacher was just god-awful
    I mean, I loved the guy, he had been my track coach for a couple of years, but my god he was just a terrible teacher when it came to programming
    I basically taught myself by skimming the book and doodling code in a notebook, because he talked and it was like I was Charlie Brown

    Me Too! on
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    Charles KinboteCharles Kinbote Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    i don't even know what homeroom means

    Charles Kinbote on
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    Cold Salmon and HatredCold Salmon and Hatred __BANNED USERS regular
    edited June 2008
    he teaches a lot of your subjects and you go back to him for like advisory time or something

    Cold Salmon and Hatred on
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    Charles KinboteCharles Kinbote Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    huh weird

    Charles Kinbote on
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    Me Too!Me Too! __BANNED USERS regular
    edited June 2008
    Not always, Zot
    Here, homeroom meant you showed up in the morning for attendance, and then maybe you would have them for an actual class later in the day
    Like I never had my homeroom teacher for an actual class, because she taught French and I didn't take it

    Me Too! on
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    Cold Salmon and HatredCold Salmon and Hatred __BANNED USERS regular
    edited June 2008
    yeah that's what it means now, in high school

    but at the time that was what homeroom teacher meant

    Cold Salmon and Hatred on
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    tony_importanttony_important Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    My french teacher in grade 10 was fucking bananas.
    She used to just come into class and yell at us about how we're bad students.
    Then she'd start to cry, and apologize. It was weird.
    Needless to say, she wasn't in the school 2nd semester.

    tony_important on
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    Me Too!Me Too! __BANNED USERS regular
    edited June 2008
    The librarians used to just let me show up and chill instead of going to class
    "Do you have a pass?" "Uh hang on"
    At this point I'd reach across the desk and snag a blank pass and scribble on it
    "There you go" "Alright cool"

    Me Too! on
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    Cold Salmon and HatredCold Salmon and Hatred __BANNED USERS regular
    edited June 2008
    oh yeah, I've never had a good French Teacher

    except Mrs. Benning

    she was a babe and she was teaching grade 9s French despite being a grade 4 teacher, so needless to say we didn't learn much but she was so nice

    and then we had our religion teacher

    god damn, religion was the last thing on my mind in her class

    Cold Salmon and Hatred on
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