this one time my friend came in a girls mouth without warning and she was upset so she spat it out into his eye. after washing it out because it stung like a bitch apparently, she thought it was hilarious. so he took all her clothes and tossed them out a window and kicked her out. much more hilarious
this one time my friend came in a girls mouth without warning and she was upset so she spat it out into his eye. after washing it out because stung like a bitch apparently, she thought it was hilarious. so he took all her clothes and tossed them out a window and kicked her out. much more hilarious
this one time my friend came in a girls mouth without warning and she was upset so she spat it out into his eye. after washing it out because stung like a bitch apparently, she thought it was hilarious. so he took all her clothes and tossed them out a window and kicked her out. much more hilarious
hahahaha what
dude was still living at his parents place at the time too. and they were home. I guess they thought it was funny too
Shit, that reminds me. I knew this guy I used to do theater with, and we were driving to get lunch between rehearsals. Cool guy, not the kind I'd expect to be crude or gross or anything. Totally decides to disclose to me that he gets head in the car from his girlfriend all the damn time. I'm like "Wow, uh, cool dude." Theater people usually tend to keep their cars a friggin' mess, so you usually find a shit ton of empty bottles of water, gatorade, what have you.
He proceeds to tell me that he uses these receptacles for his semen after getting road head. I was like "Haw haw, that's gross, but funny. Good joke."
Three days into tech week, I end up leaving my phone in his car. I go out to get it.
Behind the passenger seat. Gatorade bottle with fucking dried up jizz in it. My phone was laying right next to it in that crack between the seat and the door. I retched a few times, grabbed my phone, and have had to swear off Gatorade to this day. I don't talk to him much anymore and didn't bring it up.
He didn't even throw it away.
Wait, this is a thread about terrible sex. Whoops.
I sorta knew this guy in high school, he didn't actually go there but he helped out with a lot of the theater productions, tech stuff. He was maybe 20 or 21 at the time I was acquainted with him. Weird goth dude and a total asshole. Had a lot of weird tattoos and piercings, including several piercings on his dick, and was always trying to "show his piercings" to some of the sluttier theater girls.
I later found out that a girlfriend of his got angry about his various and repeated unfaithfulness, and in the middle of servicing him, got a firm grip and ripped all the piercings out of his dick in one go.
I wondered in horror what this would do to the structural integrity of one's dick, and was informed that since that day, it was like a lump of cookie dough.
I sorta knew this guy in high school, he didn't actually go there but he helped out with a lot of the theater productions, tech stuff. He was maybe 20 or 21 at the time I was acquainted with him. Weird goth dude and a total asshole. Had a lot of weird tattoos and piercings, including several piercings on his dick, and was always trying to "show his piercings" to some of the sluttier theater girls.
I later found out that a girlfriend of his got angry about his various and repeated unfaithfulness, and in the middle of servicing him, got a firm grip and ripped all the piercings out of his dick in one go.
I wondered in horror what this would do to the structural integrity of one's dick, and was informed that since that day, it was like a lump of cookie dough.
Wow. Good story.
On an unrelated note, does anyone know how to retrieve a pair of testicles from an abdominal cavity? A...friend of mine really needs to know.
Posts
If you're wearing a condom, not difficult at all.
man sex is so manly that the other person's feelings don't matter
I knew that girl was different, but I didn't just how different until it was too late.
Druhim has solved the puzzle.
hahahaha what
dude was still living at his parents place at the time too. and they were home. I guess they thought it was funny too
so yeah, it's not that hard for a dude to fake it
These sexual education DVDs have taught me wrong!
I don't have eyes in my mouth.
also you're the second person i called a card today
i think in this very same thread!
yeah you really get around
I didn't know that actually happened
...I can see now why women think men are pigs.
Facebook: MeekinOnMovies
Twitter: Twitter.com/MeekinOnMovies
My 10 commandments of game reviewing
7 Great Games Playing Watch_Dogs will remind you of/url]
Far Cry 4: 10 Essential Features it Must Have
10 Videogames Ruined By The Hype
We seem to be in some sort of iScribble slump.
I blame Campion.
Because his tablet breaks every time he tries to iScribble and I cry.
Just went with it because if you go ass to pussy you risk giving her a urinary tract infection so heyo
and now you have the aids
So did she wake up again before you finished?
hahaha
and she just went with it? I'd imagine after it happened you would just become trying to see if you could hold on for 8 seconds
He proceeds to tell me that he uses these receptacles for his semen after getting road head. I was like "Haw haw, that's gross, but funny. Good joke."
Three days into tech week, I end up leaving my phone in his car. I go out to get it.
Behind the passenger seat. Gatorade bottle with fucking dried up jizz in it. My phone was laying right next to it in that crack between the seat and the door. I retched a few times, grabbed my phone, and have had to swear off Gatorade to this day. I don't talk to him much anymore and didn't bring it up.
He didn't even throw it away.
Wait, this is a thread about terrible sex. Whoops.
drunk sex is just awful
I'm not very sensitive to begin with and when I've got that much rum in me, I'm really just humoring you. Plus oh god so sore when you wake up.
Worried with good reason. (NSFW. Honestly. Really. Don't fucking click this.)
I'm afraid to click that spoiler. I'm not sure I want to know. I'll just keep trying to fuck everything. -- trentsteel
I later found out that a girlfriend of his got angry about his various and repeated unfaithfulness, and in the middle of servicing him, got a firm grip and ripped all the piercings out of his dick in one go.
I wondered in horror what this would do to the structural integrity of one's dick, and was informed that since that day, it was like a lump of cookie dough.
Internet rule.
also if it's generally so wet already sou don't notice a bit more fluid
Wow. Good story.
On an unrelated note, does anyone know how to retrieve a pair of testicles from an abdominal cavity? A...friend of mine really needs to know.
Time is a factor here.