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[Movies]: YOU MANIACS!!! DAMN YOU ALL TO HELL!!!

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  • RedTideRedTide Registered User regular
    Atomika wrote: »
    I'm watching The Founder right now and I'm embarrassed for everyone

    Should have called the movie McJobs

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  • AtomikaAtomika Live fast and get fucked or whatever Registered User regular
    It's the film version of a rail-shooter

    All things are said, not shown, and nothing permeates past the surface

    This is a movie you'd get in a kit from IKEA

  • AtomikaAtomika Live fast and get fucked or whatever Registered User regular
    No, it's a feature-length dramatized recreation of a crime scene

  • BobbleBobble Registered User regular
    Wonder Woman got me so jazzed up that I actually loaded up Batman V Superman to play in the background over the weekend and just looked up whenever Gal was on screen.

    Loved the bit where Bruce was trying to be charming with the "I've known a few women like you" and Diana looks just like the teacher that had a grade-school kid ask to be her boyfriend.
    Oh this is funny. These mortal boys are so clueless but they're cute sometimes.

  • AstaerethAstaereth In the belly of the beastRegistered User regular
    I saw The Accountant today. First, until I started watching it I thought it starred Matt Damon. So there's that.

    Second, I feel kinda disappointed in it. It's not terrible, but it's one of those movies where most of the pieces are good but they don't fit together right. It's a shame because the core is really neat, they just should have given Affleck something actually interesting to do and skipped 90% of the backstory.

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  • ThirithThirith Registered User regular
    I think you may have mixed it up with The Accountant!, the inexistent Soderbergh sequel to The Informant! - now with twice as much male stripping.

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    "Nothing is gonna save us forever but a lot of things can save us today." - Night in the Woods
  • AtomikaAtomika Live fast and get fucked or whatever Registered User regular
    Thirith wrote: »
    I think you may have mixed it up with The Accountant!, the inexistent Soderbergh sequel to The Informant! - now with twice as much male stripping.

    "I think we gotta couple law breakers in here tonight . . . ."


    *whips out ledger*

  • ThirithThirith Registered User regular
    "... that's the biggest ledger I've ever seen!"

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    "Nothing is gonna save us forever but a lot of things can save us today." - Night in the Woods
  • BobbleBobble Registered User regular
    "Yes, I bet it needs a lot of.... balancing."

  • honoverehonovere Registered User regular
    Atomika wrote: »
    It's the film version of a rail-shooter

    All things are said, not shown, and nothing permeates past the surface

    This is a movie you'd get in a kit from IKEA

    These are actually what IKEA has in their stores:
    ja3l0t9ejq6j.jpg

  • ThirithThirith Registered User regular
    edited June 2017
    I can't put my finger on what it is, but I find that pic creepy. There's something almost Uncanny Valley about it; it's the kind of DVD cases you'd get in a film where the protagonist finds out that his entire life is a fabrication. The Truman Show with a more Cronenbergian touch.

    Thirith on
    webp-net-resizeimage.jpg
    "Nothing is gonna save us forever but a lot of things can save us today." - Night in the Woods
  • honoverehonovere Registered User regular
    Thirith wrote: »
    I can't put my finger on what it is, but I find that pic creepy. There's something almost Uncanny Valley about it; it's the kind of DVD cases you'd get in a film where the protagonist finds out that his entire life is a fabrication. The Truman Show with a more Cronenbergian touch.

    They also have video games the same style. Among others "CALL your MOMMY: say oops I'm sorry (100% uncut)" and "Grand-Ma's Auto"

  • JazzJazz Registered User regular
    Thirith wrote: »
    I can't put my finger on what it is, but I find that pic creepy. There's something almost Uncanny Valley about it; it's the kind of DVD cases you'd get in a film where the protagonist finds out that his entire life is a fabrication. The Truman Show with a more Cronenbergian touch.

    It reminded me of the grocery store where Otto worked in Repo Man, where all the products just had plain labels that said stuff like BEANS or BEER on them.

  • TexiKenTexiKen Dammit! That fish really got me!Registered User regular
    The Founder is great how they show the creation of the speedee system is filmmaking at its best someone must be a Burger King fan to not like the movie

  • DracomicronDracomicron Registered User regular
    Jazz wrote: »
    Thirith wrote: »
    I can't put my finger on what it is, but I find that pic creepy. There's something almost Uncanny Valley about it; it's the kind of DVD cases you'd get in a film where the protagonist finds out that his entire life is a fabrication. The Truman Show with a more Cronenbergian touch.

    It reminded me of the grocery store where Otto worked in Repo Man, where all the products just had plain labels that said stuff like BEANS or BEER on them.

    Or the sunglasses from They Live.

  • AtomikaAtomika Live fast and get fucked or whatever Registered User regular
    I hope the author of Ray Kroc's Wikipedia page got a screenwriting credit.

  • TexiKenTexiKen Dammit! That fish really got me!Registered User regular
    All that talk here about wishing Trevorrow would be moved off Episode 9 must have been heard by a dyslexic god because Lord & Miller are off of the Han Solo movie due to creative differences, even though it's a few months into filming.

    I guess Disney shot first a zing I'm so witty #clapbackAT-AT

  • TenzytileTenzytile Registered User regular
    So I watched The Birth of a Nation, the one from last year about Nat Turner, and it's a real misfire.

    More than anything, it takes (who I imagine to be) a pretty fascinating historical character and makes a generic hero's journey out of their story. Parker is clearly a fan, but his reverence amounts to several cliched, passionate speeches in closeup, and treating all of the supporting characters as caricatures. I particularly wasn't a fan of Nat's wife, who, from the moment she's introduced, seems to exist only as a pretty thing bad things can happen to so Nat gets motivated. His religious conviction doesn't go much further than his set of values (gotta have that bible-quote showdown, right?), and a few Christ allegories and such.

    It's a bit of a wasted opportunity conceptually, but what really got to me was the craft of the thing. I wouldn't call it inept, but it's the most lukewarm, non-distinct, stumbling succession of images I've seen in a while. A 201X-post-Malick's-return-postmodern-impressionist swath of cinematic dead-horse kicking. You've got your pointless handheld, your sun-up-sun-down mood shots, your 'lets follow a kid running around in steadicam', your goofy overlit night sequences, your dolly back when you wanna make a statement, your pointless time-lapse, your conceptually built and heavily symbolic scenes that are presented so haphazardly they sorta fail to make the point they were driving at in the first place. Moreover, it's just clumsily shot and edited. This really smells like something that came in at just over 3 hours and they destroyed the natural pacing of it to keep it under 2.

    It strikes me as well-intentioned but naive. It leans too hard on already established structures (visual and rhythmic) and doesn't reflect meaningfully on its subject matter.

  • KingofMadCowsKingofMadCows Registered User regular
    TexiKen wrote: »
    All that talk here about wishing Trevorrow would be moved off Episode 9 must have been heard by a dyslexic god because Lord & Miller are off of the Han Solo movie due to creative differences, even though it's a few months into filming.

    I guess Disney shot first a zing I'm so witty #clapbackAT-AT

    Colin Trevorrow: So I'm...still in charge of Episode IX? You'll speak to the Iger about...
    Kathleen Kennedy: Be careful not to choke on your aspirations, director.

  • KadokenKadoken Giving Ends to my Friends and it Feels Stupendous Registered User regular
    edited June 2017
    Apparently the Tupac biopic is bad. That sucks, I liked Straight Outta Compton; hoped it would be more like that.

    Kadoken on
  • FencingsaxFencingsax It is difficult to get a man to understand, when his salary depends upon his not understanding GNU Terry PratchettRegistered User regular
    Tenzytile wrote: »
    So I watched The Birth of a Nation, the one from last year about Nat Turner, and it's a real misfire.

    More than anything, it takes (who I imagine to be) a pretty fascinating historical character and makes a generic hero's journey out of their story. Parker is clearly a fan, but his reverence amounts to several cliched, passionate speeches in closeup, and treating all of the supporting characters as caricatures. I particularly wasn't a fan of Nat's wife, who, from the moment she's introduced, seems to exist only as a pretty thing bad things can happen to so Nat gets motivated. His religious conviction doesn't go much further than his set of values (gotta have that bible-quote showdown, right?), and a few Christ allegories and such.

    It's a bit of a wasted opportunity conceptually, but what really got to me was the craft of the thing. I wouldn't call it inept, but it's the most lukewarm, non-distinct, stumbling succession of images I've seen in a while. A 201X-post-Malick's-return-postmodern-impressionist swath of cinematic dead-horse kicking. You've got your pointless handheld, your sun-up-sun-down mood shots, your 'lets follow a kid running around in steadicam', your goofy overlit night sequences, your dolly back when you wanna make a statement, your pointless time-lapse, your conceptually built and heavily symbolic scenes that are presented so haphazardly they sorta fail to make the point they were driving at in the first place. Moreover, it's just clumsily shot and edited. This really smells like something that came in at just over 3 hours and they destroyed the natural pacing of it to keep it under 2.

    It strikes me as well-intentioned but naive. It leans too hard on already established structures (visual and rhythmic) and doesn't reflect meaningfully on its subject matter.

    Apparently the director is a mess.

  • AstaerethAstaereth In the belly of the beastRegistered User regular
    Watched The Cider House Rules today. It's a weird movie--anemic, episodic, and unsatisfying on a narrative or thematic level, but lushly produced with a bevy of great actors giving strong performances (Caine, Maguire, Theron, etc). It plays very well as a slice of life or picaresque, very poorly as a story with a beginning, middle, end, and point. Maltin's review on his podcast that he'd like to live in that world for four or six or eight more hours is accurate; Ebert's review that it's entirely unfocused is also accurate. It's a weird movie.

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  • JazzJazz Registered User regular
    The Toronto Sun's review of Transformers: The Last Knight is goddamn hilarious.

  • BogartBogart Streetwise Hercules Registered User, Moderator Mod Emeritus
    A good critical kicking is often the best part of a bad movie. This is from The Guardian's review.
    Transformers: The Last Knight comes in at 149 minutes, and each of those minutes lasts as long as the reign of Charlemagne. Once again, normal-sized cars turn themselves into gigantic robots, while professional actors and technicians watch something comparably tumescent happen to their bank accounts.

  • knitdanknitdan In ur base Killin ur guysRegistered User regular
    I admit I have an embarrassing amount of love for when the critics get the knives out

    “I was quick when I came in here, I’m twice as quick now”
    -Indiana Solo, runner of blades
  • ThirithThirith Registered User regular
    You might enjoy Anthony Lane's Nobody's Perfect, in that case.

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    "Nothing is gonna save us forever but a lot of things can save us today." - Night in the Woods
  • BogartBogart Streetwise Hercules Registered User, Moderator Mod Emeritus
    Nobody's Perfect is a terrific collection. Movies reviews are the meat of it, but there are tons of articles about literature, Lego and all sorts.

  • urahonkyurahonky Cynical Old Man Registered User regular
    I watched Logan last night. Of course I loved it because it was a great movie. It was pretty refreshing to watch a comic book movie that wasn't an all-out spectacle and 'the world is going to end if we don't do the thing!'. It was a very narrow focus and delivered it perfectly.

  • cursedkingcursedking Registered User regular
    It's also incredibly beautiful. I got it on blu ray and had forgotten how gorgeous the movie is.

    Types: Boom + Robo | Food: Sweet | Habitat: Plains
  • TexiKenTexiKen Dammit! That fish really got me!Registered User regular
    Free Fire was one of those "oooohh a hotel rental, why not" decisions, a movie I wanted to see in theaters but it was only there for what seemed to be a week only.

    Probably better to just wait for it as a streaming movie. Interesting idea that gets lost in trying to fill a full 90 minute movie, although it's a vastly superior Marty Score executive produced film compared to Revenge of the Green Dragons, which super sucked.

    In late 70's Boston I think, you have Scarecrow, an IRA member, using Envy Adams as his go-between to facilitate a purchase of M-16s rifles from Chappie and his intermediary, Lone Ranger. These groups also bring in their own grunts who just so happened to have a bar fight the night before and it sparks a shoot out in an abandoned warehouse (and no, this isn't a Netflix movie a zing a million home runs).

    It basically takes 30 minutes to get to the free fire portion of the film with the ptew ptews, and the beginning tension build is the better part of the film, precisely because no one trusts each other. Second guessing and prodding and trying not to be noticed by the guys you fought the previous night is built the right way so no one feels like they're in the right, they're all scummy people doing a scummy thing. And when the shooting starts it works well there too, people take shots to the legs and arms that aren't treated with the blood splatter of movies because these are mostly small arms fire wounds.

    The problems arise when everyone has unlimited ammo until plot deems it necessary to not have any ammo, as well as a waste of using this vast space to do camera shots. There's a lot of confusing and hard to follow shots of people moving from rubble to rubble to try and sneak up on people, which would have helped with a lot of top down or second story shots, and they never do this despite having all this open space to set it up. There's also a twist that isn't a twist and a strong feeling of knocking off other Marty Score movies that makes the whole thing come across as an imitation instead of its own thing

    Cillian Murphy and Brie Larson are good, Copley is the standout as always, Armie Hammer fails in trying to essentially channel Don Draper and not having the charm or skill in doing so, and the rest of the cast is ok but forgettable. So you've ultimately got a middling film that tries to mix Tarantino and Scorsese together and create something bland in between. This was made by the same guy who did High Rise with Loki and that seems to carry over here, taking an interesting idea and doing nothing with it.

  • TheBlackWindTheBlackWind Registered User regular
    edited June 2017
    So It Goes wrote: »
    Watchin Netflix movies

    Shimmer Lake was an excellent little movie, recommend it, don't read too much about it first

    Now watching Man Vs. and it's slow to get going but it's actually pretty okay once it does

    I will report back on the ending

    Watched Shimmer Lake and thought it was great. Hard to believe it's from a first time director. I'll be really interested to see if it doesn't turn into something of a calling card.

    Agree that people should go into it knowing as little as I did.

    TheBlackWind on
    PAD ID - 328,762,218
  • AstaerethAstaereth In the belly of the beastRegistered User regular
    Can anyone talk about why Shimmer Lake is worth seeing without talking about the plot? Is it twisty, good atmosphere, what's the deal?

    Also is it a Netflix original or what?

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  • Disco11Disco11 Registered User regular
    edited June 2017
    Astaereth wrote: »
    Can anyone talk about why Shimmer Lake is worth seeing without talking about the plot? Is it twisty, good atmosphere, what's the deal?

    Also is it a Netflix original or what?

    Netflix original, small town bank caper flic told in an interesting way.

    Edit: It's like 90 minutes so not a huge time sink. I give it a solid B+

    Rainn Wilson plays one of the main roles and is great in a semi-serious turn.

    Disco11 on
    PSN: Canadian_llama
  • AtomikaAtomika Live fast and get fucked or whatever Registered User regular
    man, when does Noah Hawley get to make a movie?

    After seeing Legion and the first two seasons of Fargo, this guy needs to do things on the big screen

  • RedTideRedTide Registered User regular
    Atomika wrote: »
    man, when does Noah Hawley get to make a movie?

    After seeing Legion and the first two seasons of Fargo, this guy needs to do things on the big screen

    I'd have to guess he probably has a lot of creative control and or freedom and either hasn't had the write story or deal come his way.

    RedTide#1907 on Battle.net
    Come Overwatch with meeeee
  • TheBlackWindTheBlackWind Registered User regular
    RedTide wrote: »
    Atomika wrote: »
    man, when does Noah Hawley get to make a movie?

    After seeing Legion and the first two seasons of Fargo, this guy needs to do things on the big screen

    I'd have to guess he probably has a lot of creative control and or freedom and either hasn't had the write story or deal come his way.

    In addition to running half the slate at FX, he apparently has a sci-fi movie he's working on for Fox.

    I don't know how he does it all.

    PAD ID - 328,762,218
  • Disco11Disco11 Registered User regular
    RedTide wrote: »
    Atomika wrote: »
    man, when does Noah Hawley get to make a movie?

    After seeing Legion and the first two seasons of Fargo, this guy needs to do things on the big screen

    I'd have to guess he probably has a lot of creative control and or freedom and either hasn't had the write story or deal come his way.

    In addition to running half the slate at FX, he apparently has a sci-fi movie he's working on for Fox.

    I don't know how he does it all.

    It is hilarious that FX has unofficially made him their creative director.

    And good on them for doing so. Legion is a trip in all the right ways.

    PSN: Canadian_llama
  • Captain TragedyCaptain Tragedy Registered User regular
    I keep waiting to hear more about the Cat's Cradle miniseries he was supposed to be doing for FX (in between everything else).

  • AstaerethAstaereth In the belly of the beastRegistered User regular
    RedTide wrote: »
    Atomika wrote: »
    man, when does Noah Hawley get to make a movie?

    After seeing Legion and the first two seasons of Fargo, this guy needs to do things on the big screen

    I'd have to guess he probably has a lot of creative control and or freedom and either hasn't had the write story or deal come his way.

    In addition to running half the slate at FX, he apparently has a sci-fi movie he's working on for Fox.

    I don't know how he does it all.

    According to Hawley he just gets up in the morning, goes to the office, writes from 9 to 5, and then just clocks out for the day, and in this way he's written 4 seasons of television and a fucking novel in 3 years. It's monstrous and I hate him.

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  • PreacherPreacher Registered User regular
    Astaereth wrote: »
    RedTide wrote: »
    Atomika wrote: »
    man, when does Noah Hawley get to make a movie?

    After seeing Legion and the first two seasons of Fargo, this guy needs to do things on the big screen

    I'd have to guess he probably has a lot of creative control and or freedom and either hasn't had the write story or deal come his way.

    In addition to running half the slate at FX, he apparently has a sci-fi movie he's working on for Fox.

    I don't know how he does it all.

    According to Hawley he just gets up in the morning, goes to the office, writes from 9 to 5, and then just clocks out for the day, and in this way he's written 4 seasons of television and a fucking novel in 3 years. It's monstrous and I hate him.

    Man that's some dedication.

    I would like some money because these are artisanal nuggets of wisdom philistine.

    pleasepaypreacher.net
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