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This is a thread for the ladies. But fellas, listen closely

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    SwillSwill Registered User regular
    edited April 2010
    my sex thread was better

    Swill on
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    KusuguttaiKusuguttai __BANNED USERS regular
    edited April 2010
    Reginald wrote: »
    Raneados wrote: »
    Reginald wrote: »
    Hey if you don't have a condom there's always the butt.

    is this a joke post i can't tell

    yeah, it is. i don't even wanna think about anal without a jimmy. unless the girl is somehow poopless.

    if you have anal sex and get shit on your dick you did it wrong
    the colon is not a poop storage unit

    Kusuguttai on
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    Cilla BlackCilla Black Priscilla!!! Registered User regular
    edited April 2010
    Swill wrote: »
    my sex thread was better

    wasn't your sex thread a spectacular failure?

    like, the only one ever that's been bad?

    maybe this was someone else though

    Cilla Black on
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    FrankoFranko Sometimes I really wish I had four feet so I could dance with myself to the drumbeat Registered User regular
    edited April 2010
    Cloudman wrote: »
    or when you're fucking and right when you blow the hugest load of your life, you realize that you were fucking a kodiak bear and then the bear mauls you.

    I hate it when that happens.

    come back home dad, we miss you

    Franko on
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    RaneadosRaneados police apologist you shouldn't have been there, obviouslyRegistered User regular
    edited April 2010
    Reginald wrote: »
    Raneados wrote: »
    Reginald wrote: »
    Hey if you don't have a condom there's always the butt.

    is this a joke post i can't tell

    yeah, it is. i don't even wanna think about anal without a jimmy. unless the girl is somehow poopless.

    a little poo on your dick ain't no thing

    Raneados on
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    FrankoFranko Sometimes I really wish I had four feet so I could dance with myself to the drumbeat Registered User regular
    edited April 2010
    Kusuguttai wrote: »
    Reginald wrote: »
    Raneados wrote: »
    Reginald wrote: »
    Hey if you don't have a condom there's always the butt.

    is this a joke post i can't tell

    yeah, it is. i don't even wanna think about anal without a jimmy. unless the girl is somehow poopless.

    if you have anal sex and get shit on your dick you did it wrong
    the colon is not a poop storage unit

    bitches don't be knowin' how to use TP

    Franko on
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    TonkkaTonkka Some one in the club tonight Has stolen my ideas.Registered User regular
    edited April 2010
    Swill wrote: »
    my sex thread was sexier

    Tonkka on
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    KusuguttaiKusuguttai __BANNED USERS regular
    edited April 2010
    like proper anal sex preparation will keep poop from being on your dick

    Kusuguttai on
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    RaneadosRaneados police apologist you shouldn't have been there, obviouslyRegistered User regular
    edited April 2010
    Kusuguttai wrote: »
    Reginald wrote: »
    Raneados wrote: »
    Reginald wrote: »
    Hey if you don't have a condom there's always the butt.

    is this a joke post i can't tell

    yeah, it is. i don't even wanna think about anal without a jimmy. unless the girl is somehow poopless.

    if you have anal sex and get shit on your dick you did it wrong
    the colon is not a poop storage unit

    ksusu you must not have had a lot of anal sex

    you'll see some poo sooner or later

    you're not like stirring a pot of pudding or anything but to want completely poo-free anal sex is insanity

    Raneados on
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    FrankoFranko Sometimes I really wish I had four feet so I could dance with myself to the drumbeat Registered User regular
    edited April 2010
    Kusuguttai wrote: »
    like proper anal sex preparation will keep poop from being on your dick

    you gotta use a waterpik in her first, flush it out

    Franko on
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    Clint EastwoodClint Eastwood My baby's in there someplace She crawled right inRegistered User regular
    edited April 2010
    Raneados wrote: »
    Reginald wrote: »
    Raneados wrote: »
    Reginald wrote: »
    Hey if you don't have a condom there's always the butt.

    is this a joke post i can't tell

    yeah, it is. i don't even wanna think about anal without a jimmy. unless the girl is somehow poopless.

    a little poo on your dick ain't no thing

    seriously who gives a shit

    hahaha get it? no but seriously if you're gonna have poop sex then turn the light off if the thought of poop bothers you

    Clint Eastwood on
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    FrankoFranko Sometimes I really wish I had four feet so I could dance with myself to the drumbeat Registered User regular
    edited April 2010
    Raneados wrote: »
    Kusuguttai wrote: »
    Reginald wrote: »
    Raneados wrote: »
    Reginald wrote: »
    Hey if you don't have a condom there's always the butt.

    is this a joke post i can't tell

    yeah, it is. i don't even wanna think about anal without a jimmy. unless the girl is somehow poopless.

    if you have anal sex and get shit on your dick you did it wrong
    the colon is not a poop storage unit

    ksusu you must not have had a lot of anal sex

    you'll see some poo sooner or later

    you're not like stirring a pot of pudding or anything but to want completely poo-free anal sex is insanity


    half the fun is having your weiner smell like farts after anyway

    Franko on
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    KusuguttaiKusuguttai __BANNED USERS regular
    edited April 2010
    Raneados wrote: »
    Kusuguttai wrote: »
    Reginald wrote: »
    Raneados wrote: »
    Reginald wrote: »
    Hey if you don't have a condom there's always the butt.

    is this a joke post i can't tell

    yeah, it is. i don't even wanna think about anal without a jimmy. unless the girl is somehow poopless.

    if you have anal sex and get shit on your dick you did it wrong
    the colon is not a poop storage unit

    ksusu you must not have had a lot of anal sex

    you'll see some poo sooner or later

    you're not like stirring a pot of pudding or anything but to want completely poo-free anal sex is insanity

    i've had some anal sex
    no poo yet

    i am knocking on wood

    by wood i mean

    my boner

    Kusuguttai on
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    ReginaldReginald When I am Pres., I will create the Department of ______Registered User regular
    edited April 2010
    Franko wrote: »
    Kusuguttai wrote: »
    like proper anal sex preparation will keep poop from being on your dick

    you gotta use a waterpik in her first, flush it out

    does this count as foreplay?

    Reginald on
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    TLHTLH Registered User regular
    edited April 2010
    TLH wrote: »
    Or wearing a condom and everything is great and then you finish and notice the condom has ripped and then you start freaking the fuck out

    pretty much had this happen

    And she freaks out asking how I didn't know it broke

    Yes. And the only reason I can think I would know is because it felt good.


    So then every time it feels good thereafter there are always thoughts it your head about how it broke. Thank you, for that guilt, Amanda.

    TLH on
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    SwillSwill Registered User regular
    edited April 2010
    Swill wrote: »
    my sex thread was better

    wasn't your sex thread a spectacular failure?

    like, the only one ever that's been bad?

    maybe this was someone else though

    I dunno

    http://forums.penny-arcade.com/showthread.php?t=101849

    it went to a hundred

    Swill on
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    Clint EastwoodClint Eastwood My baby's in there someplace She crawled right inRegistered User regular
    edited April 2010
    personally i don't like the idea of having buttsex

    can't imagine things would look too nice back there, no sir.

    Clint Eastwood on
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    RaneadosRaneados police apologist you shouldn't have been there, obviouslyRegistered User regular
    edited April 2010
    Reginald wrote: »
    Franko wrote: »
    Kusuguttai wrote: »
    like proper anal sex preparation will keep poop from being on your dick

    you gotta use a waterpik in her first, flush it out

    does this count as foreplay?

    it sure does!

    Raneados on
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    TonkkaTonkka Some one in the club tonight Has stolen my ideas.Registered User regular
    edited April 2010
    Cloudman wrote: »
    Raneados wrote: »
    Reginald wrote: »
    Raneados wrote: »
    Reginald wrote: »
    Hey if you don't have a condom there's always the butt.

    is this a joke post i can't tell

    yeah, it is. i don't even wanna think about anal without a jimmy. unless the girl is somehow poopless.

    a little poo on your dick ain't no thing

    seriously who gives a shit

    hahaha get it? no but seriously if you're gonna have poop sex then turn the light off if the thought of poop bothers you

    If poop bothers you, you probably don't want to have anything to do with a butthole in the first place.

    No light switch is going to change that.

    Tonkka on
    Steam: evilumpire Battle.net: T0NKKA#1588 PS4: T_0_N_N_K_A Twitter Art blog/Portfolio! Twitch?! HEY SATAN Shirts and such
  • Options
    RaneadosRaneados police apologist you shouldn't have been there, obviouslyRegistered User regular
    edited April 2010
    Cloudman wrote: »
    personally i don't like the idea of having buttsex

    can't imagine things would look too nice back there, no sir.

    depends how well they keep it

    some people have impeccable poopers

    some people do not

    Raneados on
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    Volucrisus AedriusVolucrisus Aedrius Registered User regular
    edited April 2010
    Sometimes it takes something simple, like positioning myself correctly, to help stave off premature orgasm.

    Or sometimes I don't, and I go a little early, so I re-suit and then I get to have at it until she goes without fear of me fucking up the rhythm.

    Thats... my contribution to this thread.

    Volucrisus Aedrius on
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    KusuguttaiKusuguttai __BANNED USERS regular
    edited April 2010
    Cloudman wrote: »
    personally i don't like the idea of having buttsex

    can't imagine things would look too nice back there, no sir.

    it's awesome
    you should try it

    Kusuguttai on
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    RaneadosRaneados police apologist you shouldn't have been there, obviouslyRegistered User regular
    edited April 2010
    i am talking about poop a lot in the last few days

    first that H/A thread now this

    Raneados on
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    BelruelBelruel NARUTO FUCKS Registered User regular
    edited April 2010
    Franko wrote: »
    the worst thing is when you are wearing a rubber and you cum and the girl pulls out without telling you so you can't get a proper grip on the bottom of the condom and the condom unrolls itself and turns inside out and gets stuck in her vagina and semen gets everywhere and you have to pull the condom out of her vagina and you think semen got in her vagina and then you start freaking the fuck out

    h...have a thicker dick?

    Belruel on
    vmn6rftb232b.png
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    M.D.M.D. and then what happens? Registered User regular
    edited April 2010
    what about if you are banging a chick from behind will you finger her poop hole

    M.D. on
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    Blake TBlake T Do you have enemies then? Good. That means you’ve stood up for something, sometime in your life.Registered User regular
    edited April 2010
    Japan is also the place where there are forums like this one.

    Except instead of talking about the latest comic, they are talking about where they should gather, then surround a girl and do what can only be described as group rape/grouping.

    Blake T on
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    Clint EastwoodClint Eastwood My baby's in there someplace She crawled right inRegistered User regular
    edited April 2010
    Kusuguttai wrote: »
    Cloudman wrote: »
    personally i don't like the idea of having buttsex

    can't imagine things would look too nice back there, no sir.

    it's awesome
    you should try it

    nah

    i like putting my dick in vaginas more. mouths are okay too.

    Clint Eastwood on
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    KusuguttaiKusuguttai __BANNED USERS regular
    edited April 2010
    Sometimes it takes something simple, like positioning myself correctly, to help stave off premature orgasm.

    Or sometimes I don't, and I go a little early, so I re-suit and then I get to have at it until she goes without fear of me fucking up the rhythm.

    Thats... my contribution to this thread.

    this is my ejaculation story

    the first time i had sex, i did not cum

    i dont know why
    i just didn't


    this went on for like a year. even with my girlfriend i couldn't do it.
    then one day it just kinda clicked and since then i have been achievin sex orgasms!

    also one time we did it on her couch and we both came in like 20 seconds

    it was awesome

    Kusuguttai on
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    RaneadosRaneados police apologist you shouldn't have been there, obviouslyRegistered User regular
    edited April 2010
    Sometimes it takes something simple, like positioning myself correctly, to help stave off premature orgasm.

    Or sometimes I don't, and I go a little early, so I re-suit and then I get to have at it until she goes without fear of me fucking up the rhythm.

    Thats... my contribution to this thread.

    that's something i never understood

    people getting upset when the guy comes before the girl

    I mean, he can still do the do!

    He's not insta-soft and he should stay hard for as long as you continue to have things touch his dick

    Raneados on
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    M.D.M.D. and then what happens? Registered User regular
    edited April 2010
    TLH wrote: »
    TLH wrote: »
    Or wearing a condom and everything is great and then you finish and notice the condom has ripped and then you start freaking the fuck out

    pretty much had this happen

    And she freaks out asking how I didn't know it broke

    Yes. And the only reason I can think I would know is because it felt good.


    So then every time it feels good thereafter there are always thoughts it your head about how it broke. Thank you, for that guilt, Amanda.

    Yea same here, every time it feels too good I question myself and have to look.

    M.D. on
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    KusuguttaiKusuguttai __BANNED USERS regular
    edited April 2010
    what about if you are banging a chick from behind will you finger her poop hole

    done dis

    Kusuguttai on
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    YaYaYaYa Decent. Registered User regular
    edited April 2010
    I bang my lady all the time

    we're good at it I guess

    she's mildly thick which is fun as hell

    although I'm also crushing on this other girl who's in a long-term relationship and she's also totally crushing on me and there's literally no good solution to this problem sooooo I haven't had the urge to get my bone on in the last few days

    what do you think thread

    YaYa on
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    Clint EastwoodClint Eastwood My baby's in there someplace She crawled right inRegistered User regular
    edited April 2010
    like, if i was with a girl who really wanted to do that, i would do it. but i'm not gonna go out of my way for it.

    Clint Eastwood on
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    Cilla BlackCilla Black Priscilla!!! Registered User regular
    edited April 2010
    Koshian wrote: »
    I want to get buttfucked

    sounds like a good time

    seems like something that would be worth a try once

    not really into dudes though

    wonder how many women would not freak out at the prospect

    Cilla Black on
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    RaneadosRaneados police apologist you shouldn't have been there, obviouslyRegistered User regular
    edited April 2010
    Koshian wrote: »
    I want to get buttfucked

    sounds like a good time

    koshian i am relatively experienced with buttlove so shoot me a PM if you ever need sage advice

    Raneados on
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    SwillSwill Registered User regular
    edited April 2010
    I have these big ideas sometimes

    like I will get these illusions of grandeur about the sex between my partner and I. Some scheme about how we will stay up all night and go at it like rabbits, explore the darker stuff and what have you. The idea of anal comes somewhere in here.

    Orgasm comes around, and little death hits me like a goddamned train

    My mind goes blank, which is archetypal, but then everything after that is a disaster. I can't muster up the emotion to give a shit about anything or anyone. I think these awful, spontaneous thoughts that my mind seems to be incapable of conjuring up when my mind isn't a blank slate.

    And I mean this is some awful shit, at least to me personally.

    After a little while i'm alright, but I don't make for a very good post-coitus cuddler because I am broken and get the shakes after getting laid.

    Swill on
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    101101 Registered User regular
    edited April 2010
    Blaket wrote: »
    Japan is also the place where there are forums like this one.

    Except instead of talking about the latest comic, they are talking about where they should gather, then surround a girl and do what can only be described as group rape/grouping.

    w-what

    101 on
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    Blake TBlake T Do you have enemies then? Good. That means you’ve stood up for something, sometime in your life.Registered User regular
    edited April 2010
    Yaya what I think is well done for calling another woman fat.

    Blake T on
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    KusuguttaiKusuguttai __BANNED USERS regular
    edited April 2010
    YaYa wrote: »
    I bang my lady all the time

    we're good at it I guess

    she's mildly thick which is fun as hell

    although I'm also crushing on this other girl who's in a long-term relationship and she's also totally crushing on me and there's literally no good solution to this problem sooooo I haven't had the urge to get my bone on in the last few days

    what do you think thread

    get over your crush
    how does this not have a solution

    Kusuguttai on
  • Options
    Clint EastwoodClint Eastwood My baby's in there someplace She crawled right inRegistered User regular
    edited April 2010
    Swill wrote: »
    I have these big ideas sometimes

    like I will get these illusions of grandeur about the sex between my partner and I. Some scheme about how we will stay up all night and go at it like rabbits, explore the darker stuff and what have you. The idea of anal comes somewhere in here.

    Orgasm comes around, and little death hits me like a goddamned train

    My mind goes blank, which is archetypal, but then everything after that is a disaster. I can't muster up the emotion to give a shit about anything or anyone. I think these awful, spontaneous thoughts that my mind seems to be incapable of conjuring up when my mind isn't a blank slate.

    And I mean this is some awful shit, at least to me personally.

    After a little while i'm alright, but I don't make for a very good post-coitus cuddler because I am broken and get the shakes after getting laid.
    i don't know about the last couple paragraphs but i frequently want to do more stuff after orgasm and usually do nothing instead.

    Clint Eastwood on
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