What the fuck is this?
Glossolalia, the SE++ forum RPG series started up by DE?AD two years ago.
Oh this is that one roleplaying thread that I never click...
That's right! Hopefully this should clear things up for you!
So what exactly is this all about?
It's a play-by-post RPG that has a tendency to get fairly silly, run by our modest GMs DE?AD and Dubh (and also Speed now!). We've gone through a number of games already: from Glossolalia 4++ (which covered a scat-filled medieval setting to one filled with space-faring cats), to RADlands (Post-Apocalyptic), to the three newest games, Deucarta (Science-based medieval), Royal Blue (Wacky narrative-based world where any and all things exist) and Derelict (Nautical themed fantasy?).
Alright, can I make a character to kick sand in your character's face?
Sure! Currently we have three games running: Deucarta (run by Dubh), Royal Blue (DE?AD) and Derelict (Speed Racer). The former is currently on hiatus, but the latter two are still open for new players so feel free to make your interest known in the thread and we'll help you out!
So how do I make a character?
We play using DE?AD's homemade 100% system, a free-form set of guidelines that whittle your character sheet into two neat lines of text. All rolls are done with a d100, but here's the kicker: the GMs are kind enough to take all the logistics on their side! That means 0% number crunching and power-gamey bullshit, 100% narrative gameplay.
The link to the rules is at the top of the thread, and the GMs and other players will surely help you make your character!
Click HERE for the rules on how to make your character!
Alright, so which game should I play?
Royal Blue or Derelict, read about them below:
Magic is science. Golems are robots. Spirit philosophers roam the land. Psychics and Wizards battle over ancient artifacts that defy all natural law and reason. This is Deucarta.
Pack your bags and don't forget your sword, 'cause there will be Hell to pay before this journey is over and you don't got the time to stop for lunch.
Choose your adventure! (During play, include the two code words with your stat line!)
Characters: Marinus (AA), Rok (T4CT), Ess (Squall), Epictetus (Shock), Aaron (Stilts), Arthur (Dux), Y (DE?AD)
"Our time together in the League of Rovers was short, but was beneficial to us both. The ban on privateer organizations has hit our type hard, but I wish to continue to our services to the public underground, away from government scrutiny. With my connections and your skills, we could take advantage of this revolution and gain a great deal of wealth, or even favor from the winning side. These are uncertain times, and at the very least we can save a few lives while making a better living than working at the prisons or on riot control. Meet at the boathouse at the end of Omen street, near the ruined lighthouse. We can work out the details there."
Characters: Garent (Cyense), Desmond (Tommy), West (Shabooty), Aralia (Anti)
(Fliers sent to various wizard academies and mercenary companies)
EXPLORE untamed wilds!
DISCOVER ancient ruins and legendary artifacts!
MINGLE with barbarian warlords!
HUNT rare beasts!
BECOME part of the most important research EVER!
Research assistants needed to conduct retrieval and courier services for acclaimed royal researcher Armades Kinas, currently conducting research in Sevyn Turs, deep within the Dreamwilds. Rooms and supplies provided per diem, payment will be rendered after each job. Inquire at your local arcane college for more details and to schedule an interview. References required.
[The Mediran Plains][Dokk]
Characters: Gorlaf (Cheese), Castleguard (Rane), Furnace (Dichotomy), Carmine Beel (Valve), John (Speed), Baird (Captain K), Shu (Bahamut)
(Backroom of a closed ale house in the city-state of Etlin)
"All right you bastards, the gates of Etlin are closed up tighter than the princess's cunt with Jevin's army at the gate. The city can hold up for a few months, give or take, before supplies are out. After that? We're crushed under the boot heels of those slavering rock gnawers. The council doesn't have a lot of options, and that's were I come in- recruiting you would-be mercenaries to bust out and find a way to end this siege. The other city states aren't keen on getting involved, and that has to change for Etlin to have a chance at living through this. I'm not promising a great deal of wealth, here, but I can guarantee a shit load of action, fame, and- if everything turns out lucky- the gratitude of goddamn civilization. Can you pussies take the blood oath and fight this out to the end? If you can't, turn your ass around, march out that door and get your pale white ass out of my sight."
[Rules for Character Creation]
The Code of the Royal Blue
An Agent must be an upstanding citizen and an exemplary person of impeachable moral fiber.
An Agent sacrifices himself to protect others. To do less is grounds for removal.
An Agent suffers no weakness of character that would render him a danger to others.
An Agent wears his badge proudly, and openly. His uniform is the colour of the Shield.
An Agent upholds Compassion, Peace, and Freedom, but above all Justice.
An Agent is before all things is an Agent.
Character Concepts must be delivered in two sentences or less
Characters are outstanding at whatever they do.
Characters must want
to be in the Royal Blue.
Characters must want
to do good.
Begins on Nov. 14
Long ago, civilization was destroyed and the world became a vast desert. Now mankind struggles to survive in the ruins of its former greatness.
also it's nautically themed because why the fuck not.
[DLC ACCESSORIZERS AND BAUBLES]URL="https://www.paypal.com/cgi-bin/webscr?cmd=_donations&business=MTWSharlow%40gmail%2ecom&lc=US&no_note=1&no_shipping=1¤cy_code=USD&bn=PP%2dDonationsBF%3abtn_donateCC_LG%2egif%3aNonHosted"]Add Points[/URL
Location: southern South America
This was supposed to be easy money. You were hired on as the crew of an old sailor who needed some folks to do the heavy lifting for him on a scavenging job. Unfortunately, when you reached the dig site it turned out that a Lockjaw ship had beaten you to the punch. You're at their mercy, and you'd better work something out fast because they're not known for taking prisoners.
[The Great Cargoship Caper]
Location: Southeastern Indian Ocean
A cargo ship is travelling to Trullia, the largest National city outside of the continent. You are among a small handful of people that have taken up residence in the small passenger compartment for the four day long journey. The quarters are getting a bit cramped but you can't really complain. Considering the Naval escort the ship is receiving and how deep into National territory you are there is absolutely no chance of pirates attempting to attack the ship at all. Nope, you are absolutely, one hundred percent safe.
...Did anyone else just hear that?
Introducing The RED Room
[Glossolalia Black Account]
Located in Central City's thriving commercial district, adjacent to the world famous Black night club, the RED Room is an exclusive establishment catering to those looking for a more meaningful purchase than the tourist traps and chain stores can offer.
Players may trade in old, unwanted DLC, including Missions, Equipment, and Cards, for Glossolalia Credits, which can be used, in turn, to purchase from the RED selection of items. Old DLC has a trade in value of 250g each, while Glossolalia Collectible Card Game Cards fetch a full 500g. If you have a Platinum card, you may trade it in for 1000g, though we ask that you hold onto your Black Cards, as they offer entrance to the notoriously exclusive Black club, along with the obvious benefits of status.
Hat Pack - 250g
Bloody Raccoon Armor - 250g
Whore's Armor - 250g
DLC Mission - 250g
Old Gloss Card - 500g
Pt Card - 1000g
New for the 2010 Holiday Season are Patches
, small insignias that grant the character mechanical benefits outside of their Traits.
On Sale Now: Patch Pack 1
- Scimattar Patch (400g): Boosts Occupation and Flaw by +20%.
- Catspaw Patch (200g): Gain Special from alcohol. Loose ability to speak properly.
- Engineer Patch (200g): +30% Chance to technical rolls. -1/2 Special Gain.
- Green Thumb Patch (200g): Gain bonuses to Chance when near plants.
- Haze Patch (200g): Rolling 24 will grant you a vision of the future.
- Black Door Patch (400g): As long as you have Special, you cannot be killed, only rendered unconcious.
- Grizzly Patch (600g): Gain Special from failures.
- Red Eye Patch (200g): Increases effect of medical actions.
- Shield Patch (200g): Lowers Stress Gains from physical effects.
- Six-Shooter Patch (300g): Gain Special when reloading.
[A heavy, black graphite card with a picture of a strange city engraved into it. Just knowing you own it makes you feel suave and important.][Special: VIP: You're a very important person, NPCs know it, and will react favorably.]
[Introducing the Glossolalia Collectible Card Collection! Be the envy of your friends! Impress women! Show that dick at work who's boss! You are! If you collect Glossolalia Collectible Card Colelction Cards! Each Card comes with a unique, useful, and occasionally devastating Glossolalia Collectible Card Collection Card Capability! Collect all the Glossolalia Collectible Card Collection Cards and be the Glossolalia Collectible Card Collection Card Collection Commander! And, thanks to the patented Glossolalia Collectible Card Collection Carry-Over, all Cards remains with you through all Glossolalia-Brand Games! Only 500g, ORDER NOW!
[Glossolalia Collectible Card Collection Cards Currently Available]
...and many more coming soon!
Seasons now available on UMD!
There's no way I'm reading through all of this bullshit.
Yeah don't, it's all crap. Also you don't need to know any of it for the new campaigns.
Glossolalia 4++:            
RADlands:                    
Deucarta, Royal Blue & Derelict: