I would love it if you all came and lived on my block and helped raise my kids kthx also then maybe porp would let me adopt more like I want
We have obvs been thinking about adoption, and there are some fucking racial disparities when it comes to who does and doesn't get adopted, so now I am weirdly conditioned to think about kids any time I see a cute little girl who isn't white.
So it turns out there is a shortage of nice beaches in Belize. Most of the beaches on the ocean side are covered in sargassum/seaweed and kind of smelly and gross. A little bit deeper out the water is clear and amazing, but the ocean side beaches themselves are largely not good.
On the other hand, the backside of the island, as we discovered during the fishing trip, is stunning. It's just forever of crystal clear water like three feet deep and beautiful sand bottom and no waves. The problem is there's not really many ways to get back there on land, because there's a whole mangrove swamp and lagoon between the beaches and the areas where you can actually stay. There is one road, but it leads to this kind of overdeveloped beach night club area, which is beautiful, but not really our scene. As we went past though on Saturday I saw that there were a bunch of totally empty beaches just a little ways up or down the coast from the area you can access. My plan was to rent a kayak and paddle to one of the undeveloped beaches, and do the ring/kneeling thing there, but MissNub didn't want to rent a kayak and I obviously couldn't tell her why I wanted to rent a kayak.
So we went with plan B, which was just walk along in the water until we found something more quiet and isolated. I set her up on one beach and said I was going to go fishing on the next one. I had stashed the ring in the bottom of the backpack I was using and wrote a "will you marry me?" in the sand, and used a crab I found as the dot for the i and the ring box as the dot for the ?.
That done, I put the ring in my pocket, and went to get Christina and said "I found something to show you." She asked what, and because I'm not very smart the best I could come up in the moment with was "there's a dead crab over there." At which point she knew what was up, but humored me anyways.
Anyways, we went over and she saw the thing and we cried and I did the kneeling thing and she said yes and there we are. But now we can just say "sometimes there's a dead crab" and we both know what it means and thats kind of nice. And, in my defense, there was in fact a dead crab.
+22
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ShivahnUnaware of her barrel shifter privilegeWestern coastal temptressRegistered User, Moderatormod
I want to live in a weird commune
+5
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Blameless Cleric An angel made of sapphires each more flawlessly cut than the last Registered Userregular
As my friends have their social lives obliterated by children, thus destabilizing mine as well, I can't help but think that our weird, isolated traditions of child-rearing also contribute
Of course if it were different, I'd have to like, deal with their kids more often, which sounds terrible tbh
Do it
Be weird uncle EM, who just kind of sits in the corner and can't figure out what to do when a kid runs over to him.
When my cousin was visiting with the new baby, his wife asked me if I wanted to hold him, and I said "no," and everyone yelled at me
Then I held him, dutifully, and he started crying immediately
The child is weak and I do not respect him
I've told this before i'm sure but not too long ago porp was at a playgroup thing and a mom was there with a newborn
mom handed said newborn over to porp to hold for a bit as she needed her hands free and porp audibly said "gross"
oops
I really don't understand the holding of the baby thing. I don't want to drop the little tyke!
But holding kittehs, that is good and noble and right, even if the kitteh doesn't want to be held.
Yeah this happened to me with my son, they were all "don't you want to hold him..."
But seriously when I'd bring in the little shit goblin I was super selective on who got to hold him because he's not a puppy!
I would like some money because these are artisanal nuggets of wisdom philistine.
As my friends have their social lives obliterated by children, thus destabilizing mine as well, I can't help but think that our weird, isolated traditions of child-rearing also contribute
Of course if it were different, I'd have to like, deal with their kids more often, which sounds terrible tbh
Do it
Be weird uncle EM, who just kind of sits in the corner and can't figure out what to do when a kid runs over to him.
When my cousin was visiting with the new baby, his wife asked me if I wanted to hold him, and I said "no," and everyone yelled at me
Then I held him, dutifully, and he started crying immediately
The child is weak and I do not respect him
I've told this before i'm sure but not too long ago porp was at a playgroup thing and a mom was there with a newborn
mom handed said newborn over to porp to hold for a bit as she needed her hands free and porp audibly said "gross"
oops
I really don't understand the holding of the baby thing. I don't want to drop the little tyke!
But holding kittehs, that is good and noble and right, even if the kitteh doesn't want to be held.
babs are so warm and sometimes they grab onto you with their teeny little hands so tight and their heads release an inexplicably alluring odor that i think is basically like a cat's poop toxins that makes you want to take care of them
See, I don't get that, at least with human babies. Kittens, though...
As my friends have their social lives obliterated by children, thus destabilizing mine as well, I can't help but think that our weird, isolated traditions of child-rearing also contribute
Of course if it were different, I'd have to like, deal with their kids more often, which sounds terrible tbh
Do it
Be weird uncle EM, who just kind of sits in the corner and can't figure out what to do when a kid runs over to him.
When my cousin was visiting with the new baby, his wife asked me if I wanted to hold him, and I said "no," and everyone yelled at me
Then I held him, dutifully, and he started crying immediately
The child is weak and I do not respect him
I've told this before i'm sure but not too long ago porp was at a playgroup thing and a mom was there with a newborn
mom handed said newborn over to porp to hold for a bit as she needed her hands free and porp audibly said "gross"
oops
I really don't understand the holding of the baby thing. I don't want to drop the little tyke!
But holding kittehs, that is good and noble and right, even if the kitteh doesn't want to be held.
babs are so warm and sometimes they grab onto you with their teeny little hands so tight and their heads release an inexplicably alluring odor that i think is basically like a cat's poop toxins that makes you want to take care of them
See, I don't get that, at least with human babies. Kittens, though...
i mean kittens are pretty adorbs
Allegedly a voice of reason.
+1
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ShivahnUnaware of her barrel shifter privilegeWestern coastal temptressRegistered User, Moderatormod
I used to do this a lot: "when I’m at work I am always analyzing how other people might be feeling or thinking in general or about me"
I have since realized that "no one cares or is thinking about you" is a much better way to approach the world.
How often would you say you think about what your coworkers are doing or what your thoughts about them are? Not directly related to you I mean.
I realized the answer is probably, pretty much never so the opposite is probably true. I might be interested in something they are doing, or worried about a fuck up that has happened, but I'm not devoting time to them in any meaningful way for the most part.
Second, the guy internalized feedback and is adjusting his behavior accordingly, you might argue with him about the internal reasoning, or be mad that he didn't empathize correctly in the past but he's making an effort to grow. There is literally nothing more that we should be asking of people than that, beyond that is all icing on the cake.
Or maybe I'm just a person with similar sociopathy as your father.
To be clear, I do not think about it with neurotic anxiety. I’m just curious about how other people’s lives are and how they feel and what they do at home and all that. People are interesting to me. (To be clear, if they’re miserable, I find that interesting rather than upsetting—so it’s not like I’m not a sociopath in that way)
Also, my dad asked me ‘ok well how should I act towards you’ and while that’s in theory a nice question, in practice this literally means me scripting every interaction and telling him what to do on every occasion. I don’t want to write his side of the dialogue as well as mine! that takes effort and isn’t very satisfying. That’s why I suggested that he think about what it might feel like to be me and what he might want from his parents if he were in a similar position. Then he can act based on that instead of just responding to negative stimulus (I yell or cut off contact) or based on a script I gave him (“I need you to tell me you unconditionally support me and still love me”)
Empathy blind spots are fascinating, every once in a while I will find myself in a position where I realize I had never thought about what some particular other person in some particular other situation must’ve felt like. Being really honest with yourself in that can be pretty rough sometimes, especially when you have a particularly overactive imagination. It’s a good practice, if painful.
Yes, my internal monologue often sounds like the dulcet tones of millennials and Ira Glass with vocal fry, all sitting around a couch, interspersed with poignant yet atonal snippets of music and street noises.
0
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HonkHonk is this poster.Registered User, __BANNED USERSregular
Maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan
How unlucky that they patched this game. It was working very well for me yesterday.
PSN: Honkalot
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TL DRNot at all confident in his reflexive opinions of thingsRegistered Userregular
HAHAHA FUCKING OWNED CHANUS U FUCKING SCRUB
Vish I'm so happy for you on this special day, god bless
+8
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BrodyThe WatchThe First ShoreRegistered Userregular
Everyone thinks communal housing is great until they have a truly bad roommate, ie me.
Sure, I'll do those dishes when I get a chance, I say, sitting bare-assed on the couch, industrial nail clippers making upsetting crunches as they grind through the thick wedges of fungal devastation I call my toenails, crescents of mottled beige flying into the air and lurking in the carpet to stab your foot three days later
Thanks, I hate this!
not a doctor, not a lawyer, examples I use may not be fully researched so don't take out of context plz, don't @ me
+3
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TTODewbackPuts the drawl in ya'llI think I'm in HellRegistered Userregular
One of life's finest pleasures is upending a container of tic tacs into your mouth. One? Pah! You are the apex predator, you are one who has lived through dangerous times and using a metal contraption powered by the force of exploding chemicals have propelled yourself to an establishment full of riches. While your parents asked you to preserve, to only take one, you can pour the entire thing into your mouth, taking care not to choke on the decadence that suffuses you.
This works for orange, I haven't tried other flavors in a really long time.
If we just keep talking about this cult compound/co-op for another two decades maybe we can make it actually happen
I'm sure I could stand living with a few of you
When we are all retiree age (which is to say, when I am dead and the rest of you are all retiree age) it would be totally feasible to just all move into a PA retirement community.
I know a few people who have lived in weird communes before.
100% of the time they came out worst than they went in.
1 buddy had to go through an aggressive treatment for a antibiotic resistant STI.
1 buddy of mine went into rehab twice to kick the addiction he picked up in his commune.
1 acquaintance left her cult and joined the military, then went to Korea and had a terrible time.
I know a few people who have lived in weird communes before.
100% of the time they came out worst than they went in.
1 buddy had to go through an aggressive treatment for a antibiotic resistant STI.
1 buddy of mine went into rehab twice to kick the addiction he picked up in his commune.
1 acquaintance left her cult and joined the military, then went to Korea and had a terrible time.
Their mistakes were not being cult leaders!
And also in the one case actually fucking people in the cult. Turns out that's a bad idea.
I know a few people who have lived in weird communes before.
100% of the time they came out worst than they went in.
1 buddy had to go through an aggressive treatment for a antibiotic resistant STI.
1 buddy of mine went into rehab twice to kick the addiction he picked up in his commune.
1 acquaintance left her cult and joined the military, then went to Korea and had a terrible time.
Tobias:
You know, Lindsay, as a therapist, I have advised... a number of couples to explore an open relationship where the couple remains emotionally committed but free to explore extramarital encounters.
Lindsay:
Well, did it work for those people?
Tobias:
No, it never does. I mean, these people somehow delude themselves into thinking it might, but... but it might work for us.
I don't mind communal housing so much as long as I get my own bathroom attached to my bedroom.
Being in a nudity-tolerant household helps. But still there are times when, say, I want to jump in the shower after having really messy sex and I don't want to walk through common areas while slathered with a visible mix of bodily fluids
Nudity is one thing. Cum is another.
every person who doesn't like an acquired taste always seems to think everyone who likes it is faking it. it should be an official fallacy.
Posts
We have obvs been thinking about adoption, and there are some fucking racial disparities when it comes to who does and doesn't get adopted, so now I am weirdly conditioned to think about kids any time I see a cute little girl who isn't white.
I got the other camera offloaded now:
So it turns out there is a shortage of nice beaches in Belize. Most of the beaches on the ocean side are covered in sargassum/seaweed and kind of smelly and gross. A little bit deeper out the water is clear and amazing, but the ocean side beaches themselves are largely not good.
On the other hand, the backside of the island, as we discovered during the fishing trip, is stunning. It's just forever of crystal clear water like three feet deep and beautiful sand bottom and no waves. The problem is there's not really many ways to get back there on land, because there's a whole mangrove swamp and lagoon between the beaches and the areas where you can actually stay. There is one road, but it leads to this kind of overdeveloped beach night club area, which is beautiful, but not really our scene. As we went past though on Saturday I saw that there were a bunch of totally empty beaches just a little ways up or down the coast from the area you can access. My plan was to rent a kayak and paddle to one of the undeveloped beaches, and do the ring/kneeling thing there, but MissNub didn't want to rent a kayak and I obviously couldn't tell her why I wanted to rent a kayak.
So we went with plan B, which was just walk along in the water until we found something more quiet and isolated. I set her up on one beach and said I was going to go fishing on the next one. I had stashed the ring in the bottom of the backpack I was using and wrote a "will you marry me?" in the sand, and used a crab I found as the dot for the i and the ring box as the dot for the ?.
That done, I put the ring in my pocket, and went to get Christina and said "I found something to show you." She asked what, and because I'm not very smart the best I could come up in the moment with was "there's a dead crab over there." At which point she knew what was up, but humored me anyways.
Anyways, we went over and she saw the thing and we cried and I did the kneeling thing and she said yes and there we are. But now we can just say "sometimes there's a dead crab" and we both know what it means and thats kind of nice. And, in my defense, there was in fact a dead crab.
I'm sure I could stand living with a few of you
I'd love it if you took a look at my art and my PATREON!
Yeah this happened to me with my son, they were all "don't you want to hold him..."
But seriously when I'd bring in the little shit goblin I was super selective on who got to hold him because he's not a puppy!
pleasepaypreacher.net
See, I don't get that, at least with human babies. Kittens, though...
i am dead
i mean kittens are pretty adorbs
Convenient, I have questions to write out and am lacking a tittle.
(skip to 1:15)
Empathy blind spots are fascinating, every once in a while I will find myself in a position where I realize I had never thought about what some particular other person in some particular other situation must’ve felt like. Being really honest with yourself in that can be pretty rough sometimes, especially when you have a particularly overactive imagination. It’s a good practice, if painful.
How unlucky that they patched this game. It was working very well for me yesterday.
Vish I'm so happy for you on this special day, god bless
@Shivahn wear gloves, and if you have a way to do so, have a big piece of cardboard under your car to catch all the oil you are going to spill.
The Monster Baru Cormorant - Seth Dickinson
Steam: Korvalain
Thanks, I hate this!
god bless
What game?
I figured distance was a main factor, or more generally how often people have to move.
What I'm saying is join your local elks club or something.
This works for orange, I haven't tried other flavors in a really long time.
I offer this drawing I did of our Mayan site tour as evidence
When we are all retiree age (which is to say, when I am dead and the rest of you are all retiree age) it would be totally feasible to just all move into a PA retirement community.
100% of the time they came out worst than they went in.
1 buddy had to go through an aggressive treatment for a antibiotic resistant STI.
1 buddy of mine went into rehab twice to kick the addiction he picked up in his commune.
1 acquaintance left her cult and joined the military, then went to Korea and had a terrible time.
Their mistakes were not being cult leaders!
And also in the one case actually fucking people in the cult. Turns out that's a bad idea.
Why does the orange guy have such a big penis?
Tobias:
You know, Lindsay, as a therapist, I have advised... a number of couples to explore an open relationship where the couple remains emotionally committed but free to explore extramarital encounters.
Lindsay:
Well, did it work for those people?
Tobias:
No, it never does. I mean, these people somehow delude themselves into thinking it might, but... but it might work for us.
Being in a nudity-tolerant household helps. But still there are times when, say, I want to jump in the shower after having really messy sex and I don't want to walk through common areas while slathered with a visible mix of bodily fluids
Nudity is one thing. Cum is another.
the "no true scotch man" fallacy.