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Your First Time

1356752

Posts

  • BroloBrolo Broseidon Lord of the BroceanRegistered User regular
    edited July 2007
    neville wrote: »
    My first post was probably in the WoW forum, sadly.
    I don't think I did much when I first joined. I had been lurking for over a year and had never really posted, so I don't think I had much reason to post when I made my account either.

    And first time sexually was pretty bad. The guy was O_o and I remember him saying "Your first time is the best; everything after will just be less, so enjoy it." And he was awful. I thought "Hmm, I guess I won't be doing this much then, this is kind of boring"

    good times!


    Neville you seem pretty gay but you are from the worst gay we have on these forums.

    Brolo on
  • HunterHunter Chemist with a heart of Au Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Knob wrote: »
    Bogey wrote: »
    Go on...

    oh you know

    bearskin rug, lava lamp, best of led zeppelin on his 8-track

    all talkin' sweet like, 'you go ahead and get that wine cooler in you, then ditch your pants because you're giving me a backrub'

    Disco Stu would be so proud

    Hunter on
  • nevilleneville The Worst Gay (Seriously. The Worst!)Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Rolo wrote: »
    neville wrote: »
    My first post was probably in the WoW forum, sadly.
    I don't think I did much when I first joined. I had been lurking for over a year and had never really posted, so I don't think I had much reason to post when I made my account either.

    And first time sexually was pretty bad. The guy was O_o and I remember him saying "Your first time is the best; everything after will just be less, so enjoy it." And he was awful. I thought "Hmm, I guess I won't be doing this much then, this is kind of boring"

    good times!


    Neville you seem pretty gay but you are from the worst gay we have on these forums.

    uh
    thanks?

    neville on
    nevillexmassig1.png
  • naporeonnaporeon Seattle, WARegistered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Rolo wrote: »
    neville wrote: »
    My first post was probably in the WoW forum, sadly.
    I don't think I did much when I first joined. I had been lurking for over a year and had never really posted, so I don't think I had much reason to post when I made my account either.

    And first time sexually was pretty bad. The guy was O_o and I remember him saying "Your first time is the best; everything after will just be less, so enjoy it." And he was awful. I thought "Hmm, I guess I won't be doing this much then, this is kind of boring"

    good times!


    Neville you seem pretty gay but you are from the worst gay we have on these forums.
    neville is such a bad gay that he doesn't have a pen in his car.

    naporeon on
  • BroloBrolo Broseidon Lord of the BroceanRegistered User regular
    edited July 2007
    neville wrote: »
    Rolo wrote: »
    neville wrote: »
    My first post was probably in the WoW forum, sadly.
    I don't think I did much when I first joined. I had been lurking for over a year and had never really posted, so I don't think I had much reason to post when I made my account either.

    And first time sexually was pretty bad. The guy was O_o and I remember him saying "Your first time is the best; everything after will just be less, so enjoy it." And he was awful. I thought "Hmm, I guess I won't be doing this much then, this is kind of boring"

    good times!


    Neville you seem pretty gay but you are from the worst gay we have on these forums.

    uh
    thanks?


    oops

    you are *far* from the worst gay we have on these forums

    That title goes to Keith.


    For shame, Keith.

    Brolo on
  • nevilleneville The Worst Gay (Seriously. The Worst!)Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Rolo wrote: »
    neville wrote: »
    Rolo wrote: »
    neville wrote: »
    My first post was probably in the WoW forum, sadly.
    I don't think I did much when I first joined. I had been lurking for over a year and had never really posted, so I don't think I had much reason to post when I made my account either.

    And first time sexually was pretty bad. The guy was O_o and I remember him saying "Your first time is the best; everything after will just be less, so enjoy it." And he was awful. I thought "Hmm, I guess I won't be doing this much then, this is kind of boring"

    good times!


    Neville you seem pretty gay but you are from the worst gay we have on these forums.

    uh
    thanks?


    oops

    you are *far* from the worst gay we have on these forums

    That title goes to Keith.


    For shame, Keith.

    I think that's because Keith's bi.
    I'm a better gay than that.

    Girls are for gabbing with and shopping.
    Not for sexing.

    neville on
    nevillexmassig1.png
  • bsjezzbsjezz Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    i didn't orgasm either of my first two times because i didn't have condoms

    so they were pretty unremarkable

    also i posted here sometime when the Writers Block was slow and i wandered down here.

    bsjezz on
    sC4Q4nq.jpg
  • naporeonnaporeon Seattle, WARegistered User regular
    edited July 2007
    I lost my virginity to another virgin.

    On a waterbed.

    Because, you know, we figured that two virgins fucking wouldn't be awkward enough on its own.

    naporeon on
  • HunterHunter Chemist with a heart of Au Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    bsjezz wrote: »
    i didn't orgasm either of my first two times because i didn't have condoms

    so they were pretty unremarkable

    also i posted here sometime when the Writers Block was slow and i wandered down here.

    Wait...what?

    So because you didn't have a condom, you didn't finish off utilizing any number of alternate methods that could have sealed the deal? Damn, that's like blue balls to the extreme.

    Hunter on
  • BroloBrolo Broseidon Lord of the BroceanRegistered User regular
    edited July 2007
    naporeon wrote: »
    I lost my virginity to another virgin.

    On a waterbed.

    Because, you know, we figured that two virgins fucking wouldn't be awkward enough on its own.

    The rolling waves are supposed to soothe you and relax you.

    Or you accidentally puncture the bed with your dick and in a series of poorly timed flailing motions manage to drown the both of you.

    Brolo on
  • BroloBrolo Broseidon Lord of the BroceanRegistered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Hunter wrote: »
    bsjezz wrote: »
    i didn't orgasm either of my first two times because i didn't have condoms

    so they were pretty unremarkable

    also i posted here sometime when the Writers Block was slow and i wandered down here.

    Wait...what?

    So because you didn't have a condom, you didn't finish off utilizing any number of alternate methods that could have sealed the deal? Damn, that's like blue balls to the extreme.

    Pfft, no wonder.

    He posts in the Writer's Block.

    Brolo on
  • HunterHunter Chemist with a heart of Au Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Rolo wrote: »
    naporeon wrote: »
    I lost my virginity to another virgin.

    On a waterbed.

    Because, you know, we figured that two virgins fucking wouldn't be awkward enough on its own.

    The rolling waves are supposed to soothe you and relax you.

    Or you accidentally puncture the bed with your dick and in a series of poorly timed flailing motions manage to drown the both of you.

    How sharp do you think his dick is, unless he's wielding a katana down there or some crazy shit.

    Hunter on
  • naporeonnaporeon Seattle, WARegistered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Here is a story about what my parents thought (and possibly still think) was my first time.
    So, I was in community college at the time, 19, and still living with my parents. One day, when both of my parents were at work, my girlfriend and I came back to the house for some sex between classes. We were in my bedroom, and had just gotten all our clothes off when I hear an ominous noise. Our family's dog is barking. Now, this dog barked for one reason and one reason only: my Dad was coming up the sidewalk.

    Not waiting for visual confirmation, I throw on my bathrobe and run out. At this point, my parents still think I'm a virgin, and for some reason, maintaining this illusion seems like the Most Important Thing in the World at that moment. Anyhow, I make some small talk with my Dad, who tells me that he came home for lunch (rare, but it did happen on occasion). He asks if I'm hungry, and I say yes, so he makes me a great sandwich, and we sit and eat. Probably half an hour goes by. My girlfriend is still hiding, naked, in my bedroom, but I'm thinking all is cool, since my Dad is apparently none-the-wiser. We finish lunch, chat some more for a bit, and he gets up, saying that it's time for him to get back to work.

    As he opens the front door to leave, he says over his shoulder, glib as can be:

    "You can tell her to come out now."

    naporeon on
  • bsjezzbsjezz Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Rolo wrote: »
    Hunter wrote: »
    bsjezz wrote: »
    i didn't orgasm either of my first two times because i didn't have condoms

    so they were pretty unremarkable

    also i posted here sometime when the Writers Block was slow and i wandered down here.

    Wait...what?

    So because you didn't have a condom, you didn't finish off utilizing any number of alternate methods that could have sealed the deal? Damn, that's like blue balls to the extreme.

    Pfft, no wonder.

    He posts in the Writer's Block.

    nothing wrong with the writer's block

    anyway at least they orgasmed, which i always find far more satisfying

    bsjezz on
    sC4Q4nq.jpg
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] new member
    edited July 2007
    The user and all related content has been deleted.

    [Deleted User] on
  • TossrockTossrock too weird to live too rare to dieRegistered User regular
    edited July 2007
    bsjezz wrote: »
    Rolo wrote: »
    Hunter wrote: »
    bsjezz wrote: »
    i didn't orgasm either of my first two times because i didn't have condoms

    so they were pretty unremarkable

    also i posted here sometime when the Writers Block was slow and i wandered down here.

    Wait...what?

    So because you didn't have a condom, you didn't finish off utilizing any number of alternate methods that could have sealed the deal? Damn, that's like blue balls to the extreme.

    Pfft, no wonder.

    He posts in the Writer's Block.

    nothing wrong with the writer's block

    anyway at least they orgasmed, which i always find far more satisfying

    That's what they told you at least

    Tossrock on
    sig.png
  • BroloBrolo Broseidon Lord of the BroceanRegistered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Hunter wrote: »
    Rolo wrote: »
    naporeon wrote: »
    I lost my virginity to another virgin.

    On a waterbed.

    Because, you know, we figured that two virgins fucking wouldn't be awkward enough on its own.

    The rolling waves are supposed to soothe you and relax you.

    Or you accidentally puncture the bed with your dick and in a series of poorly timed flailing motions manage to drown the both of you.

    How sharp do you think his dick is, unless he's wielding a katana down there or some crazy shit.

    Naporeon always has his saber sharpened.

    Brolo on
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] new member
    edited July 2007
    The user and all related content has been deleted.

    [Deleted User] on
  • bsjezzbsjezz Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Tossrock wrote: »
    That's what they told you at least

    why would you go and destroy my only happy memories

    bsjezz on
    sC4Q4nq.jpg
  • nevilleneville The Worst Gay (Seriously. The Worst!)Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    nap that story is A+

    neville on
    nevillexmassig1.png
  • MKRMKR Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    naporeon wrote: »
    Here is a story about what my parents thought (and possibly still think) was my first time.
    So, I was in community college at the time, 19, and still living with my parents. One day, when both of my parents were at work, my girlfriend and I came back to the house for some sex between classes. We were in my bedroom, and had just gotten all our clothes off when I hear an ominous noise. Our family's dog is barking. Now, this dog barked for one reason and one reason only: my Dad was coming up the sidewalk.

    Not waiting for visual confirmation, I throw on my bathrobe and run out. At this point, my parents still think I'm a virgin, and for some reason, maintaining this illusion seems like the Most Important Thing in the World at that moment. Anyhow, I make some small talk with my Dad, who tells me that he came home for lunch (rare, but it did happen on occasion). He asks if I'm hungry, and I say yes, so he makes me a great sandwich, and we sit and eat. Probably half an hour goes by. My girlfriend is still hiding, naked, in my bedroom, but I'm thinking all is cool, since my Dad is apparently none-the-wiser. We finish lunch, chat some more for a bit, and he gets up, saying that it's time for him to get back to work.

    As he opens the front door to leave, he says over his shoulder, glib as can be:

    "You can tell her to come out now."

    A+ would read again

    MKR on
  • naporeonnaporeon Seattle, WARegistered User regular
    edited July 2007
    neville wrote: »
    nap that story is A+
    My dad is one sharp and funny motherfucker.

    naporeon on
  • BroloBrolo Broseidon Lord of the BroceanRegistered User regular
    edited July 2007
    pegging
    99 up, 10 down

    When the tables are voluntarily turned on heterosexual anal intercourse and the female servicee becomes the servicer for the man. Because most women don't have penises, a strap-on dildo is necessary.

    Brolo on
  • nevilleneville The Worst Gay (Seriously. The Worst!)Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    naporeon wrote: »
    neville wrote: »
    nap that story is A+
    My dad is one sharp and funny motherfucker.

    indeed.

    now reply to my PM or get on aim, damnit

    neville on
    nevillexmassig1.png
  • tony_importanttony_important Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Rolo wrote: »
    pegging
    99 up, 10 down

    When the tables are voluntarily turned on heterosexual anal intercourse and the female servicee becomes the servicer for the man. Because most women don't have penises, a strap-on dildo is necessary.

    woah this is news

    tony_important on
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • TxdoHawkTxdoHawk Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    I have no idea what my first post in the forums was. I probably started in G&T.

    First time attempting having sex was with a girl that had just dumped me and wanted a fuck before she went home (long distance relationship). This didn't work out, I didn't have my heart in it for obvious reasons. She flipped out and acted like a complete bitch after all was said and done, so I wasn't too upset about the whole thing.

    TxdoHawk on
    TuxedoHawk.png
  • BroloBrolo Broseidon Lord of the BroceanRegistered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Rolo wrote: »
    pegging
    99 up, 10 down

    When the tables are voluntarily turned on heterosexual anal intercourse and the female servicee becomes the servicer for the man. Because most women don't have penises, a strap-on dildo is necessary.

    woah this is news

    I put the number of penisless women in the low 60s.

    Brolo on
  • TossrockTossrock too weird to live too rare to dieRegistered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Rolo wrote: »
    Rolo wrote: »
    pegging
    99 up, 10 down

    When the tables are voluntarily turned on heterosexual anal intercourse and the female servicee becomes the servicer for the man. Because most women don't have penises, a strap-on dildo is necessary.

    woah this is news

    I put the number of penisless women in the low 60s.

    Absolute or percentage

    Tossrock on
    sig.png
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] new member
    edited July 2007
    The user and all related content has been deleted.

    [Deleted User] on
  • tony_importanttony_important Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    I'm too lazy to look for my first post, But it was probably in G & T as well.
    Eventually, I found SE++ more fun.

    First time with sex?
    My girlfriend and I did it in my room. Nothing eventful (besides than the sex) happened, other than that the next morning, my mom's friend (who was renting a room in our house at the time) saw my girlfriend up stairs and said "Oh, that's what the commotion was about *wink*".

    tony_important on
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • Garlic BreadGarlic Bread i'm a bitch i'm a bitch i'm a bitch i'm a Registered User, Disagreeable regular
    edited July 2007
    Rolo wrote: »
    neville wrote: »
    Rolo wrote: »
    neville wrote: »
    My first post was probably in the WoW forum, sadly.
    I don't think I did much when I first joined. I had been lurking for over a year and had never really posted, so I don't think I had much reason to post when I made my account either.

    And first time sexually was pretty bad. The guy was O_o and I remember him saying "Your first time is the best; everything after will just be less, so enjoy it." And he was awful. I thought "Hmm, I guess I won't be doing this much then, this is kind of boring"

    good times!


    Neville you seem pretty gay but you are from the worst gay we have on these forums.

    uh
    thanks?


    oops

    you are *far* from the worst gay we have on these forums

    That title goes to Keith.


    For shame, Keith.

    i'm the worst sex

    Garlic Bread on
  • Garlic BreadGarlic Bread i'm a bitch i'm a bitch i'm a bitch i'm a Registered User, Disagreeable regular
    edited July 2007
    naporeon wrote: »
    neville wrote: »
    nap that story is A+
    My dad is one sharp and funny motherfucker.

    does he have the looks, though

    Garlic Bread on
  • Calamity JaneCalamity Jane That Wrong Love Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Keith.

    Man, what a faggot.

    Calamity Jane on
    twitter https://twitter.com/mperezwritesirl michelle patreon https://www.patreon.com/thatwronglove michelle's comic book from IMAGE COMICS you can order http://a.co/dn5YeUD
  • #pipe#pipe Cocky Stride, Musky odours Pope of Chili TownRegistered User regular
    edited July 2007
    naporeon wrote: »
    Here is a story about what my parents thought (and possibly still think) was my first time.
    So, I was in community college at the time, 19, and still living with my parents. One day, when both of my parents were at work, my girlfriend and I came back to the house for some sex between classes. We were in my bedroom, and had just gotten all our clothes off when I hear an ominous noise. Our family's dog is barking. Now, this dog barked for one reason and one reason only: my Dad was coming up the sidewalk.

    Not waiting for visual confirmation, I throw on my bathrobe and run out. At this point, my parents still think I'm a virgin, and for some reason, maintaining this illusion seems like the Most Important Thing in the World at that moment. Anyhow, I make some small talk with my Dad, who tells me that he came home for lunch (rare, but it did happen on occasion). He asks if I'm hungry, and I say yes, so he makes me a great sandwich, and we sit and eat. Probably half an hour goes by. My girlfriend is still hiding, naked, in my bedroom, but I'm thinking all is cool, since my Dad is apparently none-the-wiser. We finish lunch, chat some more for a bit, and he gets up, saying that it's time for him to get back to work.

    As he opens the front door to leave, he says over his shoulder, glib as can be:

    "You can tell her to come out now."

    please give your dad a high five for me

    #pipe on
  • IpseDixitIpseDixit Treat me like a pirate And give me that bootyRegistered User regular
    edited July 2007
    My first post was in some thread in SE++ after lurking for about 6 months, and creating an account about a week earlier. I don't even remember what it was. I think somebody yelled at me for the join date, and then got yelled at by somebody else.

    As for my first time sexually I'm still waiting...

    IpseDixit on
    ipsesignew.jpg
    Flickr - PSN ID - IamTetsuo - Steam
  • NoomNoom Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    My first post was in the AC.
    I think Grifter called me a faggot and told me to cross-hatch less.

    Noom on
    sig.gif
  • HunterHunter Chemist with a heart of Au Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    My first post was in SE++ or whatever it was called 5 years ago.

    My first time having sex was with a friend when I was a freshmen in high school. She was a nice girl who wasn't afraid of sex, but only slept with boyfriends she had been dating a while. I guess she felt the need to teach me some moves, we dated a month or two, and went back to being friends. The first time was kind of a surprise and she was all "OK, it's time to do stuff, let me show you". I was an easy lay, she didn't even have to take me out to dinner or a show.

    Hunter on
  • tsplittertsplitter Registered User regular
    edited July 2007
    my first post here was the thumbs up emoticon

    that is still more interesting than any of my sex life

    tsplitter on
    FqmsaJ6.png
  • BroloBrolo Broseidon Lord of the BroceanRegistered User regular
    edited July 2007
    Noom wrote: »
    My first post was in the AC.
    I think Grifter called me a faggot and told me to cross-hatch less.

    It's nice to know Grifter hasn't changed.

    Brolo on
  • Garlic BreadGarlic Bread i'm a bitch i'm a bitch i'm a bitch i'm a Registered User, Disagreeable regular
    edited July 2007
    Noom wrote: »
    My first post was in the AC.
    I think Grifter called me a faggot and told me to cross-hatch less.

    are you jim lee?

    Garlic Bread on
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