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Mysteries are Solved in this [Chat]

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    TavTav Irish Minister for DefenceRegistered User regular
    edited November 2008
    Is that being a bigger dick? I don't know. Honestly I suppose it really doesn't matter as she lives like an hour and a half away now but she wants to see me over thanksgiving break and I feel like I should explain my being a dick for the last X years.

    It's the first one Aldo. Like she went out of her way to make it apparent that she was attracted to me before and I went out to party and grab strange hot tail etc.

    Is this guilt?

    Can you not apologize without explaining it? I know it may come across as being deceptive, but personally, I think that going into detail about things is kinda dickish.

    Tav on
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    ViolentChemistryViolentChemistry __BANNED USERS regular
    edited November 2008
    Dude, don't tell people why you didn't want to date them before when you're trying to date them. Unless it's a funny story, but yours isn't.

    ViolentChemistry on
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    DeShadowCDeShadowC Registered User regular
    edited November 2008
    Dude, don't tell people why you didn't want to date them before when you're trying to date them. Unless it's a funny story, but yours isn't.

    Yeah. DUE yours kind of comes across as, "You're not what I really want, but as I've gotten older I'm desperate and my standards have gotten lower so I guess I can date you now."

    DeShadowC on
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    TavTav Irish Minister for DefenceRegistered User regular
    edited November 2008
    japan wrote: »
    GIS "puppies".

    I get puppies.

    There's nothing unexpected on the first ten pages, even with safesearch off.

    EDIT: To be fair, one of the results is of a dead puppy with a fatal congenital deformity.

    Looking up "mittens" used to bring up something hilarious, but not anymore :|
    Tav wrote: »
    I wonder if Kanye West takes himself seriously.

    I wonder this of most rappers.

    Yes and yes.

    :(

    Tav on
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    DasUberEdwardDasUberEdward Registered User regular
    edited November 2008
    Hm. It's not so much of a lowering of standards. It's more of a

    "whoops i've been a cunt while there's a great person i'm ignoring"

    but yeah i'm not going to make anything of it. i'll just continue the awkward and lingering tension for propriety. I'm sorry for the h/a, I haven't slept.

    DasUberEdward on
    steam_sig.png
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    AlectharAlecthar Alan Shore We're not territorial about that sort of thing, are we?Registered User regular
    edited November 2008
    Tav wrote: »
    I wonder if Kanye West takes himself seriously.

    I wonder this of most rappers.

    Yes and yes.

    Kanye West seems like kind of a douche. No one gets to declare themselves the voice of a generation.

    Alecthar on
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    DeShadowCDeShadowC Registered User regular
    edited November 2008
    Tav wrote: »

    Looking up "mittens" used to bring up something hilarious, but not anymore :|

    Bondage mittens?

    DeShadowC on
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    AldoAldo Hippo Hooray Registered User regular
    edited November 2008
    Hm. It's not so much of a lowering of standards. It's more of a

    "whoops i've been a cunt while there's a great person i'm ignoring"

    but yeah i'm not going to make anything of it. i'll just continue the awkward and lingering tension for propriety. I'm sorry for the h/a, I haven't slept.
    Grow a pair, you dolt.

    Aldo on
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    DeShadowCDeShadowC Registered User regular
    edited November 2008
    Hm. It's not so much of a lowering of standards. It's more of a

    "whoops i've been a cunt while there's a great person i'm ignoring"

    but yeah i'm not going to make anything of it. i'll just continue the awkward and lingering tension for propriety. I'm sorry for the h/a, I haven't slept.

    Just ask her out.

    DeShadowC on
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    TavTav Irish Minister for DefenceRegistered User regular
    edited November 2008
    Alecthar wrote: »
    Tav wrote: »
    I wonder if Kanye West takes himself seriously.

    I wonder this of most rappers.

    Yes and yes.

    Kanye West seems like kind of a douche. No one gets to declare themselves the voice of a generation.

    Jay-Z refers to himself as "Jayhova".

    Tav on
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    TavTav Irish Minister for DefenceRegistered User regular
    edited November 2008
    DeShadowC wrote: »
    Tav wrote: »

    Looking up "mittens" used to bring up something hilarious, but not anymore :|

    Bondage mittens?

    uh, nsfw
    two chicks on their backs, another one wrist deep in each of them with the caption "these will keep my hands warm".

    Tav on
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    AldoAldo Hippo Hooray Registered User regular
    edited November 2008
    DSC, the point is that Tube doesn't want to change names, period.

    Aldo on
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    DeShadowCDeShadowC Registered User regular
    edited November 2008
    Tav wrote: »
    DeShadowC wrote: »
    Tav wrote: »

    Looking up "mittens" used to bring up something hilarious, but not anymore :|

    Bondage mittens?

    uh, nsfw
    two chicks on their backs, another one wrist deep in each of them with the caption "these will keep my hands warm".

    Oh I know about that. Right now on page three you get "bondage mittens" I'm just a little in o_O mode.

    DeShadowC on
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    Shazkar ShadowstormShazkar Shadowstorm Registered User regular
    edited November 2008
    why is pot thread so idiotic, why did i read that

    Shazkar Shadowstorm on
    poo
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    DasUberEdwardDasUberEdward Registered User regular
    edited November 2008
    Aldo wrote: »
    Hm. It's not so much of a lowering of standards. It's more of a

    "whoops i've been a cunt while there's a great person i'm ignoring"

    but yeah i'm not going to make anything of it. i'll just continue the awkward and lingering tension for propriety. I'm sorry for the h/a, I haven't slept.
    Grow a pair, you dolt.
    DeShadowC wrote: »
    Hm. It's not so much of a lowering of standards. It's more of a

    "whoops i've been a cunt while there's a great person i'm ignoring"

    but yeah i'm not going to make anything of it. i'll just continue the awkward and lingering tension for propriety. I'm sorry for the h/a, I haven't slept.

    Just ask her out.

    No really it's not that. We go to two different universities now. It's just awkward and I feel as though I should apologize for fucking things up quite a deal in the past. But that's not exactly an easy thing to bring up or a wise thing to bring up.

    DasUberEdward on
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    DasUberEdwardDasUberEdward Registered User regular
    edited November 2008
    why is pot thread so idiotic, why did i read that

    Because it's about pot.

    DasUberEdward on
    steam_sig.png
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    DeShadowCDeShadowC Registered User regular
    edited November 2008
    Aldo wrote: »
    DSC, the point is that Tube doesn't want to change names, period.

    I know but normally he givens hilarious name changes to those who ask in the thread. Like the guy who was named captain reading comprehension or something like that.

    DeShadowC on
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    Shazkar ShadowstormShazkar Shadowstorm Registered User regular
    edited November 2008
    why is pot thread so idiotic, why did i read that

    Because it's about pot.
    fair enough

    Shazkar Shadowstorm on
    poo
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    DasUberEdwardDasUberEdward Registered User regular
    edited November 2008
    DeShadowC wrote: »
    Aldo wrote: »
    DSC, the point is that Tube doesn't want to change names, period.

    I know but normally he givens hilarious name changes to those who ask in the thread. Like the guy who was named captain reading comprehension or something like that.

    LOOK AT MY NAME. I ALWAYS MISS THAT DAMN THREAD BY TWO MINUTES.

    DasUberEdward on
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    ViolentChemistryViolentChemistry __BANNED USERS regular
    edited November 2008
    DeShadowC wrote: »
    Tav wrote: »
    DeShadowC wrote: »
    Tav wrote: »

    Looking up "mittens" used to bring up something hilarious, but not anymore :|

    Bondage mittens?

    uh, nsfw
    two chicks on their backs, another one wrist deep in each of them with the caption "these will keep my hands warm".

    Oh I know about that. Right now on page three you get "bondage mittens" I'm just a little in o_O mode.

    What the kind that make all your fingers useless? And sometimes have like a metal ring at the tip to tie or clip them to something?

    ViolentChemistry on
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    ElendilElendil Registered User regular
    edited November 2008
    I am hella into Stereolab

    Elendil on
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    DrezDrez Registered User regular
    edited November 2008
    Aldo wrote: »
    Hm. It's not so much of a lowering of standards. It's more of a

    "whoops i've been a cunt while there's a great person i'm ignoring"

    but yeah i'm not going to make anything of it. i'll just continue the awkward and lingering tension for propriety. I'm sorry for the h/a, I haven't slept.
    Grow a pair, you dolt.
    DeShadowC wrote: »
    Hm. It's not so much of a lowering of standards. It's more of a

    "whoops i've been a cunt while there's a great person i'm ignoring"

    but yeah i'm not going to make anything of it. i'll just continue the awkward and lingering tension for propriety. I'm sorry for the h/a, I haven't slept.

    Just ask her out.

    No really it's not that. We go to two different universities now. It's just awkward and I feel as though I should apologize for fucking things up quite a deal in the past. But that's not exactly an easy thing to bring up or a wise thing to bring up.

    The answer is this: You don't apologize to her. Apologizing to her is a selfish action designed to assuage the guilt you apparently feel. All it will do to her is make her feel bad. Consider her behavior: Does it seem like she's angry with you? Does it seem like she blames you for anything? Only you know for certain but based on the data you've given here, I'd have to conclude that the answer is no.

    I don't mean to be insulting, but that's the blunt truth. Apologizing to someone because you feel guilty is very rarely about the other person at all.

    Drez on
    Switch: SW-7690-2320-9238Steam/PSN/Xbox: Drezdar
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    AlectharAlecthar Alan Shore We're not territorial about that sort of thing, are we?Registered User regular
    edited November 2008
    Drez wrote: »
    Aldo wrote: »
    Hm. It's not so much of a lowering of standards. It's more of a

    "whoops i've been a cunt while there's a great person i'm ignoring"

    but yeah i'm not going to make anything of it. i'll just continue the awkward and lingering tension for propriety. I'm sorry for the h/a, I haven't slept.
    Grow a pair, you dolt.
    DeShadowC wrote: »
    Hm. It's not so much of a lowering of standards. It's more of a

    "whoops i've been a cunt while there's a great person i'm ignoring"

    but yeah i'm not going to make anything of it. i'll just continue the awkward and lingering tension for propriety. I'm sorry for the h/a, I haven't slept.

    Just ask her out.

    No really it's not that. We go to two different universities now. It's just awkward and I feel as though I should apologize for fucking things up quite a deal in the past. But that's not exactly an easy thing to bring up or a wise thing to bring up.

    The answer is this: You don't apologize to her. Apologizing to her is a selfish action designed to assuage the guilt you apparently feel. All it will do to her is make her feel bad. Consider her behavior: Does it seem like she's angry with you? Does it seem like she blames you for anything? Only you know for certain but based on the data you've given here, I'd have to conclude that the answer is no.

    I don't mean to be insulting, but that's the blunt truth. Apologizing to someone because you feel guilty is very rarely about the other person at all.

    Like when I apologized to you last night. I basically just did it so that if you kept on the issue I'd be able to claim the moral high ground and feel good about myself and turn people against you.

    Edit: Too much truth, or just enough?

    Alecthar on
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    DeShadowCDeShadowC Registered User regular
    edited November 2008
    Alecthar wrote: »
    Like when I apologized to you last night. I basically just did it so that if you kept on the issue I'd be able to claim the moral high ground and feel good about myself and turn people against you.

    Edit: Too much truth, or just enough?

    God its annoying when people do that.

    DeShadowC on
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    DasUberEdwardDasUberEdward Registered User regular
    edited November 2008
    Drez wrote: »
    Aldo wrote: »
    Hm. It's not so much of a lowering of standards. It's more of a

    "whoops i've been a cunt while there's a great person i'm ignoring"

    but yeah i'm not going to make anything of it. i'll just continue the awkward and lingering tension for propriety. I'm sorry for the h/a, I haven't slept.
    Grow a pair, you dolt.
    DeShadowC wrote: »
    Hm. It's not so much of a lowering of standards. It's more of a

    "whoops i've been a cunt while there's a great person i'm ignoring"

    but yeah i'm not going to make anything of it. i'll just continue the awkward and lingering tension for propriety. I'm sorry for the h/a, I haven't slept.

    Just ask her out.

    No really it's not that. We go to two different universities now. It's just awkward and I feel as though I should apologize for fucking things up quite a deal in the past. But that's not exactly an easy thing to bring up or a wise thing to bring up.

    The answer is this: You don't apologize to her. Apologizing to her is a selfish action designed to assuage the guilt you apparently feel. All it will do to her is make her feel bad. Consider her behavior: Does it seem like she's angry with you? Does it seem like she blames you for anything? Only you know for certain but based on the data you've given here, I'd have to conclude that the answer is no.

    I don't mean to be insulting, but that's the blunt truth. Apologizing to someone because you feel guilty is very rarely about the other person at all.

    Revelation. Thank you Drez. I am bad at these intimate and sincere things but that is very helpful. It ain't about alleviating my guilt.

    DasUberEdward on
    steam_sig.png
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    AldoAldo Hippo Hooray Registered User regular
    edited November 2008
    Ok, problem solved, what's next on the agenda?

    Question round?

    Aldo on
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    DasUberEdwardDasUberEdward Registered User regular
    edited November 2008
    Alecthar wrote: »
    Drez wrote: »
    Aldo wrote: »
    Hm. It's not so much of a lowering of standards. It's more of a

    "whoops i've been a cunt while there's a great person i'm ignoring"

    but yeah i'm not going to make anything of it. i'll just continue the awkward and lingering tension for propriety. I'm sorry for the h/a, I haven't slept.
    Grow a pair, you dolt.
    DeShadowC wrote: »
    Hm. It's not so much of a lowering of standards. It's more of a

    "whoops i've been a cunt while there's a great person i'm ignoring"

    but yeah i'm not going to make anything of it. i'll just continue the awkward and lingering tension for propriety. I'm sorry for the h/a, I haven't slept.

    Just ask her out.

    No really it's not that. We go to two different universities now. It's just awkward and I feel as though I should apologize for fucking things up quite a deal in the past. But that's not exactly an easy thing to bring up or a wise thing to bring up.

    The answer is this: You don't apologize to her. Apologizing to her is a selfish action designed to assuage the guilt you apparently feel. All it will do to her is make her feel bad. Consider her behavior: Does it seem like she's angry with you? Does it seem like she blames you for anything? Only you know for certain but based on the data you've given here, I'd have to conclude that the answer is no.

    I don't mean to be insulting, but that's the blunt truth. Apologizing to someone because you feel guilty is very rarely about the other person at all.

    Like when I apologized to you last night. I basically just did it so that if you kept on the issue I'd be able to claim the moral high ground and feel good about myself and turn people against you.

    Edit: Too much truth, or just enough?

    You apologized to me last night? For what?

    DasUberEdward on
    steam_sig.png
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    ElendilElendil Registered User regular
    edited November 2008
    Aldo wrote: »
    Ok, problem solved, what's next on the agenda?

    Question round?
    why won't I ever be truly happy

    Elendil on
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    ViolentChemistryViolentChemistry __BANNED USERS regular
    edited November 2008
    DeShadowC wrote: »
    Alecthar wrote: »
    Like when I apologized to you last night. I basically just did it so that if you kept on the issue I'd be able to claim the moral high ground and feel good about myself and turn people against you.

    Edit: Too much truth, or just enough?

    God its annoying when people do that.

    Man, he's not gonna help you. That whole system was his idea.

    ViolentChemistry on
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    DasUberEdwardDasUberEdward Registered User regular
    edited November 2008
    Aldo wrote: »
    Ok, problem solved, what's next on the agenda?

    Question round?

    Wait. I should just not even bring it up and keep things awkward right? Because she's like an hour and a half away and i'm a whore who likes pretty things so I don't think i'd be able to survive being 21 and faithful.

    Is it cruel to even continue talking to her if that's providing some sense of false hope?

    DasUberEdward on
    steam_sig.png
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    AldoAldo Hippo Hooray Registered User regular
    edited November 2008
    Elendil wrote: »
    Aldo wrote: »
    Ok, problem solved, what's next on the agenda?

    Question round?
    why won't I ever be truly happy

    Because you don't start your sentences with a capital letter and end them with a !/?/. when appropriate.

    Aldo on
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    JamesKeenanJamesKeenan Registered User regular
    edited November 2008
    Drez wrote: »
    The answer is this: You don't apologize to her. Apologizing to her is a selfish action designed to assuage the guilt you apparently feel. All it will do to her is make her feel bad. Consider her behavior: Does it seem like she's angry with you? Does it seem like she blames you for anything? Only you know for certain but based on the data you've given here, I'd have to conclude that the answer is no.

    I don't mean to be insulting, but that's the blunt truth. Apologizing to someone because you feel guilty is very rarely about the other person at all.

    Wait, what? How the hell does that work? "I feel guilty for doing such and such, and I know you don't blame me, but I still wanted to apologize."

    How the hell should that make her feel bad? Unless you mean "feel bad" in the same way someone "feels bad" when a child skins their knee.

    What the hell is wrong with him apologizing? An apology isn't some kind of ancient pact wherein one's soul is given up for judgment.



    [edit]: All he'd be doing is admitting he recognizes that, to himself, he made some mistakes he feels bad about, and he wanted to more formally acknowledge and put a bit of closure to the issues.

    JamesKeenan on
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    DrezDrez Registered User regular
    edited November 2008
    Alecthar wrote: »
    Drez wrote: »
    Aldo wrote: »
    Hm. It's not so much of a lowering of standards. It's more of a

    "whoops i've been a cunt while there's a great person i'm ignoring"

    but yeah i'm not going to make anything of it. i'll just continue the awkward and lingering tension for propriety. I'm sorry for the h/a, I haven't slept.
    Grow a pair, you dolt.
    DeShadowC wrote: »
    Hm. It's not so much of a lowering of standards. It's more of a

    "whoops i've been a cunt while there's a great person i'm ignoring"

    but yeah i'm not going to make anything of it. i'll just continue the awkward and lingering tension for propriety. I'm sorry for the h/a, I haven't slept.

    Just ask her out.

    No really it's not that. We go to two different universities now. It's just awkward and I feel as though I should apologize for fucking things up quite a deal in the past. But that's not exactly an easy thing to bring up or a wise thing to bring up.

    The answer is this: You don't apologize to her. Apologizing to her is a selfish action designed to assuage the guilt you apparently feel. All it will do to her is make her feel bad. Consider her behavior: Does it seem like she's angry with you? Does it seem like she blames you for anything? Only you know for certain but based on the data you've given here, I'd have to conclude that the answer is no.

    I don't mean to be insulting, but that's the blunt truth. Apologizing to someone because you feel guilty is very rarely about the other person at all.

    Like when I apologized to you last night. I basically just did it so that if you kept on the issue I'd be able to claim the moral high ground and feel good about myself and turn people against you.

    Uh, ok. That has nothing to do with what I just said unless you apologized solely out of guilt, which is what I'm talking about, but doesn't seem to be what you're talking about because you had a different motive for apologizing. But thanks for sharing.

    Drez on
    Switch: SW-7690-2320-9238Steam/PSN/Xbox: Drezdar
  • Options
    OboroOboro __BANNED USERS regular
    edited November 2008
    Gosh, Drez, you're so socially-knowledgable. It gets me hot. :3

    Oboro on
    words
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    DeShadowCDeShadowC Registered User regular
    edited November 2008
    Aldo wrote: »
    Ok, problem solved, what's next on the agenda?

    Question round?

    Wait. I should just not even bring it up and keep things awkward right? Because she's like an hour and a half away and i'm a whore who likes pretty things so I don't think i'd be able to survive being 21 and faithful.

    Is it cruel to even continue talking to her if that's providing some sense of false hope?

    How long have you known her?

    DeShadowC on
  • Options
    ElendilElendil Registered User regular
    edited November 2008
    Aldo wrote: »
    Elendil wrote: »
    Aldo wrote: »
    Ok, problem solved, what's next on the agenda?

    Question round?
    why won't I ever be truly happy

    Because you don't start your sentences with a capital letter and end them with a !/?/. when appropriate.
    i am not happy with this answer

    Elendil on
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    AlectharAlecthar Alan Shore We're not territorial about that sort of thing, are we?Registered User regular
    edited November 2008
    DeShadowC wrote: »
    Alecthar wrote: »
    Like when I apologized to you last night. I basically just did it so that if you kept on the issue I'd be able to claim the moral high ground and feel good about myself and turn people against you.

    Edit: Too much truth, or just enough?

    God its annoying when people do that.

    I cannot tell you the number of times I've heard the words "Well I said I was sorry" uttered as a defense.

    I also hate it when people attempt to end an argument by demanding you speak to them in private if you want to continue the conversation. If you keep going regardless you look like an asshole, and if you go along with them you look like you're dancing to their tune.

    Alecthar on
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    AldoAldo Hippo Hooray Registered User regular
    edited November 2008
    Aldo wrote: »
    Ok, problem solved, what's next on the agenda?

    Question round?

    Wait. I should just not even bring it up and keep things awkward right? Because she's like an hour and a half away and i'm a whore who likes pretty things so I don't think i'd be able to survive being 21 and faithful.

    Is it cruel to even continue talking to her if that's providing some sense of false hope?

    She's still in love with you? Yeah, you might want to tell her you don't feel the same about her. Or if you do then ask her out.

    Aldo on
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    DeShadowCDeShadowC Registered User regular
    edited November 2008
    Aldo wrote: »
    Elendil wrote: »
    Aldo wrote: »
    Ok, problem solved, what's next on the agenda?

    Question round?
    why won't I ever be truly happy

    Because you don't start your sentences with a capital letter and end them with a !/?/. when appropriate.

    Damned grammar/English Nazis.

    DeShadowC on
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    Loren MichaelLoren Michael Registered User regular
    edited November 2008
    i hope you get bone cancer and waste away in front of your loved ones

    Loren Michael on
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This discussion has been closed.