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Pfft..I wish..

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    Donovan PuppyfuckerDonovan Puppyfucker A dagger in the dark is worth a thousand swords in the morningRegistered User regular
    Hermano wrote: »
    TheStig wrote: »
    I'm a huge fan of hopping in the shower after a poop

    Wouldn't you just get poo all over your foot though?

    You still wipe.

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    DirtyDirtyVagrantDirtyDirtyVagrant Registered User regular
    Hermano wrote: »
    TheStig wrote: »
    I'm a huge fan of hopping in the shower after a poop

    Wouldn't you just get poo all over your foot though?

    You still wipe.

    I'm really surprised that this isn't just a given.

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    HermanoHermano Registered User regular
    Hermano wrote: »
    TheStig wrote: »
    I'm a huge fan of hopping in the shower after a poop

    Wouldn't you just get poo all over your foot though?

    You still wipe.


    Well sure, but then you're just hopping up and down right where you shat, doesn't seem too smart


    PSN- AHermano
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    HermanoHermano Registered User regular
    OBVIOUSLY the joke didn't work like it did in my head so


    PSN- AHermano
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    TamTam Registered User regular
    nyuk nyuk nyuk

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    TheStigTheStig Registered User regular
    Honestly I've just been shitting while I shower. Cut out the middle man.

    bnet: TheStig#1787 Steam: TheStig
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    TefTef Registered User regular
    edited November 2013
    TheStig wrote: »
    Honestly I've just been shitting while I shower. Cut out the middle man.

    Use your toe to smoosh it down the drain hole

    Tef on
    help a fellow forumer meet their mental health care needs because USA healthcare sucks!

    Ever tried. Ever failed. No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better

    bit.ly/2XQM1ke
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    DirtyDirtyVagrantDirtyDirtyVagrant Registered User regular
    Oh my god what no

    NO.

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    TrippyJingTrippyJing Moses supposes his toeses are roses. But Moses supposes erroneously.Registered User regular
    You know, if you flush with the seat cover up, poo particles go everywhere.

    b1ehrMM.gif
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    Brovid HasselsmofBrovid Hasselsmof [Growling historic on the fury road] Registered User regular
    I wish this thread hadn't reached a place where "poo particles" was a phrase somebody would be saying

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    VeldrinVeldrin Sham bam bamina Registered User regular
    Ah, the poo particle displacement argument.

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    DirtyDirtyVagrantDirtyDirtyVagrant Registered User regular
    Fucking AUGH

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    WheatBun01WheatBun01 Face It, Tiger Registered User regular
    I wish I was happy.

    I wish I didn't have to poop ever again.

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    WheatBun01WheatBun01 Face It, Tiger Registered User regular
    I wish all this Christmas stuff wasn't making me feel completely and utterly alone.

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    InquisitorInquisitor Registered User regular
    TrippyJing wrote: »
    You know, if you flush with the seat cover up, poo particles go everywhere.

    It happens if you flush with the seat down too.

    I fully agree with Japan putting the toilet in its own room separate from everything else. Your towels, your toothbrush, your sink, etc. Just a room with a toilet and nothing else.

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    PiptheFairPiptheFair Frequently not in boats. Registered User regular
    personally I just spray shit everywhere I go

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    TheStigTheStig Registered User regular
    edited November 2013
    If I could time travel it would be to the time when all of the world embraced japan's toilet room and the west's comfy seated toilet and the bidet. Truly that will be the golden age of mankind.

    Also flushable baby wipes please.

    TheStig on
    bnet: TheStig#1787 Steam: TheStig
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    PiptheFairPiptheFair Frequently not in boats. Registered User regular
    if I could time travel I would try my damndest to seduce heady lamar

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    Duke 2.0Duke 2.0 Time Trash Cat Registered User regular
    This line of thinking is weird until you find out they have been bathing in the toilet

    VRXwDW7.png
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    TamTam Registered User regular
    edited November 2013
    PiptheFair wrote: »
    if I could time travel I would try my damndest to seduce heady lamar

    should've married her when you had the chance, Phil

    also why the fuck do I like the cheap cotto salami way more than this fo rizzle Italian kind I bought today
    it's so bitter

    Tam on
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    TefTef Registered User regular
    Quite a few places in Australia segregate the toilet too

    help a fellow forumer meet their mental health care needs because USA healthcare sucks!

    Ever tried. Ever failed. No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better

    bit.ly/2XQM1ke
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    InquisitorInquisitor Registered User regular
    TheStig wrote: »
    If I could time travel it would be to the time when all of the world embraced japan's toilet room and the west's comfy seated toilet and the bidet. Truly that will be the golden age of mankind.

    Also flushable baby wipes please.

    Most toilets in Japan have comfy western style seats these days. And most of them are heated which is incredible in the winter, and they almost all have bidets too.

    Japan has got toilets pretty well figured out. (Well, building them at least, that whole sound princess thing to obscure the sound of you peeing is still very odd to me.)

    Out in the rural areas where I am you will still run into the occasional squat toilet which is not ideal, but, especially in homes it is pretty much all separate room, comfy, heated seat and with a bidet.

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    CorehealerCorehealer The Apothecary The softer edge of the universe.Registered User regular
    PiptheFair wrote: »
    if I could time travel I would try my damndest to seduce heady lamar

    Did she have a thing for 24 hour poop spray?

    488W936.png
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    HermanoHermano Registered User regular
    PiptheFair wrote: »
    if I could time travel I would try my damndest to seduce heady lamar


    ???

    hedley_lamarr.jpg


    PSN- AHermano
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    VeldrinVeldrin Sham bam bamina Registered User regular
    Somebody just create a wasteless digestive system please.

    We need to be making use of the whole kill.

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    CorehealerCorehealer The Apothecary The softer edge of the universe.Registered User regular
    Veldrin wrote: »
    Somebody just create a wasteless digestive system please.

    We need to be making use of the whole kill.

    I'd prefer a sexy robot body.

    488W936.png
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    VeldrinVeldrin Sham bam bamina Registered User regular
    Corehealer wrote: »
    Veldrin wrote: »
    Somebody just create a wasteless digestive system please.

    We need to be making use of the whole kill.

    I'd prefer a sexy robot body.

    The two don't need to be mutually exclusive!

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    MorivethMoriveth BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWNRegistered User regular
    Hermano wrote: »
    PiptheFair wrote: »
    if I could time travel I would try my damndest to seduce heady lamar


    ???

    hedley_lamarr.jpg

    It's Hedly.

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    TamTam Registered User regular
    Pip can't spell
    it's a thoroughly documented phenomenon

    it's Hedy Lamarr and in addition to being a brainiac, she was supes beautiful

    gfdd1cf30.jpg

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    CenoCeno pizza time Registered User regular
    edited November 2013
    I wish I hadn't spent all of college in a relationship with one girl.

    I am a better person because of that relationship, but in the "this was so fucked up I was forged into sterner stuff" way, not the poetical rom-com way. And I'm happily married now (not to that girl), but good grief.

    Kids, date around during college.

    Ceno on
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    WybornWyborn GET EQUIPPED Registered User regular
    I wish I was a better writer

    dN0T6ur.png
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    InquisitorInquisitor Registered User regular
    Ceno wrote: »
    Kids, date around during college.

    I don't think that's really solid, one size fits all advice.
    Wyborn wrote: »
    I wish I was a better writer

    Just keep reading and writing, and you will become a better writer! Try not to get discouraged and keep at it.

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    CenoCeno pizza time Registered User regular
    edited November 2013
    Inquisitor wrote: »
    Ceno wrote: »
    Kids, date around during college.

    I don't think that's really solid, one size fits all advice.

    Probably not, but I scream it at my past self on occasion.

    Ceno on
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    WybornWyborn GET EQUIPPED Registered User regular
    This is not me speaking as a beginner

    I've been writing fairly seriously for something like a decade and been trying to get some short stories published for a couple of years

    I'll revise it

    I wish the things I wrote were good enough that people wanted to pay money for them

    dN0T6ur.png
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    TheStigTheStig Registered User regular
    Wyborn wrote: »
    I wish I was a better writer

    You can start by putting periods at the end of your sentences.

    At least pretend you're trying, jeez!

    bnet: TheStig#1787 Steam: TheStig
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    RalgRalg Registered User regular
    Inquisitor wrote: »
    TrippyJing wrote: »
    You know, if you flush with the seat cover up, poo particles go everywhere.

    It happens if you flush with the seat down too.

    I fully agree with Japan putting the toilet in its own room separate from everything else. Your towels, your toothbrush, your sink, etc. Just a room with a toilet and nothing else.

    spoiler alert

    its conceivable that youjust smelled a molecule that passed cromwell's bladder

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    VeldrinVeldrin Sham bam bamina Registered User regular
    edited November 2013
    edit: whoops, can't read

    Veldrin on
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    InquisitorInquisitor Registered User regular
    Ralg wrote: »
    Inquisitor wrote: »
    TrippyJing wrote: »
    You know, if you flush with the seat cover up, poo particles go everywhere.

    It happens if you flush with the seat down too.

    I fully agree with Japan putting the toilet in its own room separate from everything else. Your towels, your toothbrush, your sink, etc. Just a room with a toilet and nothing else.

    spoiler alert

    its conceivable that youjust smelled a molecule that passed cromwell's bladder

    Oh, I am not remotely germaphobic or anything, so you are barking up the wrong tree on that front. It just seems a better set up if only just for smell reasons.

    But yeah, I plop my bare butt down on public restroom seats. I no scare.

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    VeldrinVeldrin Sham bam bamina Registered User regular
    tee hee

    plop

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    DirtyDirtyVagrantDirtyDirtyVagrant Registered User regular
    I wish I could find some really good (really angry) thrash metal (or similar music) that I could use to just light the 'get the fuck away from me' signal.

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